Loving The Corporate Prince Ch. 17-18

Copyright © 2021 by M.J. Moréo

All rights reserved. This book or any portion of, may not be reproduced, used, or distributed in any manner without prior written permission of the publisher or author, except in the case of brief quotations for critical reviews and other non-commercial uses.

Trigger Warning:

This book contains scenes that may trigger dysphoria including transphobia and penetrative intercourse (not at the same time). This book contains kink scenes including limb restriction and more. If these are themes you are not prepared to handle, please do not continue. Always read and play responsibly!

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⟡ CHAPTER SEVENTEEN ⟡

RIVER

Bzz. Bzz!

Bzz. Bzz!

Bzz. Bzz!

I hardly remember getting back to Ellis, but I remember being thankful for Stephanie giving me a ride from the airport back home.

Bzz! Bzz!

I got home under the cover of night and promised Steph I'd give her a call in the morning after a silent ride home.

Bzz! Bzz!

I didn't mean to be so edgy with her, especially because she was doing me a favor and I gave her loose details so she'd know I wasn't upset with her but after that day, I didn't have it in me to talk to anyone about anything. I hardly had it in me enough to think, let alone explain.

"How was your trip?" She smiled when I entered the car.

"The trip was... I... I don't think we're together anymore..." I tried not to think about it because crying in front of someone felt embarrassing to me even though I knew it wasn't.

"Oh my God, River! I'm so sorry, what happened?"

I shook my head.

"I don't even know right now."

When the obnoxious buzz of my phone woke me up, I was sure it'd be Steph. My eyes cracked open with what felt like all the strength I had left in my body. The small window at the top of my wall let in a blinding stream of light that stabbed me directly in the eyes and once I saw it, I groaned, suddenly being let back into the world of the conscious.

I looked down at my hoodie and jeans. My shoes were at the end of the bed - I must have kicked them off in my sleep.

Bzz. Bzz!

"Ugh, what!?"

I finally grabbed my phone and my heart stopped when the screen lit up.

10 iMessages from Dustin

5 iMessages from Cas

8 iMessages from Stephanie

1 iMessage from Gil

12 Missed Calls from Dustin

14 Missed Calls from Unknown numbers

4 Missed calls from Cas

11 Voicemails

'Did someone die?'

The reality of the situation hit me when I began scrolling through Dustin's texts.

"River, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry for everything."

"Please forgive me, I know I was wrong to not believe you."

"I put my past hurt onto you and that alone was fucked up I feel so fucking stupid."

"Cas figured it out, what the paparazzi and everyone meant."

"We think someone outed you to The Oracle Insider."

"River I'm so, so, so sorry. This is all my fault. You wouldn't even be in this position if you didn't know me."

"River, please text or call me when you get this."

"My dad is doing everything he can to figure out who the source is."

"Be careful what you say to people while we figure this out."

"I love you. So much."

Cas's texts mirrored Dustin's and so did his voicemails, but maybe it was my grogginess that didn't allow me to understand the situation fully.

'Someone outed me to The Oracle Insider? I don't even know what that is.'

Steph sent me screenshots of The Oracle Insider's front-page headline. In big, bold letters read,

'Dustin Garnier's Boyfriend's SECRET Revealed!'

Finally, I got to Gil's text.

"Dude, this is fucking ridiculous. There's tons of people with cameras outside our apartment. I could hardly get out the door. It's fucked that I get to deal with this bullshit just because you went and got a rich boyfriend."

I couldn't help but squeeze my phone out of rage.

'You have to deal with this bullshit?' I thought, scoffing out loud.

Gil and I's relationship still hadn't been fully repaired and to say that all our interactions were strained was a severe understatement. I did feel bad though.

'I really felt like I brought this on him... On this whole town... Why did I have to feel like this?'

'Be careful what you say to people while we figure this out...'

I had been so caught up in feeling angry about the fact that I was outed that I had completely forgotten that someone had done this.

'Someone went to this publication. Who though? Could it have been Dustin and Cas? Could it have been someone from Ellis? Or maybe some random person was just snooping around...'

I sighed, searching through my messages before clicking Dustin's contact and letting the phone ring in my ear.

✧

DUSTIN

The last time he was this hungover was at his apartment in Lake Stanfield and he, fortunately, had River there to take care of him. This time, Dustin's head throbbed and his body ached when he was brought back to consciousness. His eyes cracked open like broken glass and the room spun. He silently thanked the lord that he had something to focus him when he reached for his buzzing phone.

"River?" Dustin said. His voice was gravely and dry.

"Hey... You told me to call you?"

"Yeah... Um..." Dustin had almost forgotten the mayhem of yesterday. "First of all I wanted to say I'm sorry."

"It's OK," River said.

Dustin had seen River be cold, especially when they first met, but this was different. It wasn't necessarily as intentional as it was before. This time, it was sad and it broke Dustin's heart.

"River... It's not OK. It's not OK at all. In terms of the article, my dad's talking with the editor of the Oracle right now and getting the article pulled so we're working on that. I'll let you know updates on that but... About the other thing..."

"The trust thing?" River said and again, Dustin noticed the difference.

"Yeah,"

"What about it?"

"I wish I knew how to make it up to you. I'm so sorry I ever doubted you. There were so many small, doubtful voices around me and paired with my own trust issues... How can I make this right?"

There was an awkward pause that fell between them.

"I don't know, Dustin. My brain feels kind of fried right now... Everything is so overwhelming."

Each word he spoke was like a small jab at Dustin's gut. He caused so much hurt to the only person who's ever fully loved him and he felt like there was absolutely nothing he could do to fix it.

"Um... Do you have any idea who it might have been?"

"No... I don't... I don't know..." River finally broke, silently and alone. The only hint Dustin could tell he was breaking from the other end of the line were the small cracks in his voice.

"It's OK River, we'll figure this out..."

Dustin couldn't see, but could somehow sense River nodding his head on the other end of the line.

"Where does that leave us?" He whispered, receiving a deep, guttural inhale from River.

"I think I just need to be alone for awhile. If anything, to figure out where the hell my head is at... I'm sorry,"

"No, no. Don't be sorry. Y-You didn't do anything, at all. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I want you to know that whatever you need, whenever you need it - anything - I'm here. I'll be back in Lake Stanfield n-next week." Dustin's own voice shook. He did his best to keep in his tears because he didn't want River to feel any guilt whatsoever. "I'll let you know when there are updates on the article or if we hear anything else but otherwise, I'll give you your space..."

"Thank you,"

"River?"

"Hm?"

Dustin needed to say, "I love you River. I love you so much," but given that River had just said he needed some time to be alone, Dustin thought it wasn't appropriate.

"P-please stay safe, OK?"

"You too. I'm gonna go now."

"OK, Bye."

"Bye."

Dustin's overwhelming headache caused him to bury his head in his hands, but the emotion made his heartbreak until tears pooled in his palms. He gasped for air while his body shook.

"Fuck!" He cried. "Fuck,"

Dustin jumped at the sudden feeling of a warm hand on his shoulder. Spinning around, he saw his dad and Cas standing beside him with a cup of coffee and sympathetic expressions. Marius wrapped his arms around his son, rocking them back and forth as Dustin cried into his shoulder. Cas sat down at Dustin's feet.

"What did he say?" Cas said, quietly.

"He said he needed some space and I don't blame him. I mean if being outed to the national public wasn't enough, I accused him of being an untrustworthy liar." His last words sent Dustin into another fit of tears. Marius and Cas exchanged sympathetic looks.

"How do I fix this?" asked Dustin.

"Dustin," Marius began, with a small smile on his face. "Let me tell you a story. Now, these things happened long before you were born, but occasionally, your mother and I - we would have these arguments. When we would fight, I would always want to talk about it right away, right then and there. I hated her leaving but whenever she didn't get the space to leave, our fights would go for longer and longer and longer. We would argue ourselves in circles.

One night when we were fine, I asked her why she always needed to leave. She told me that she would get so upset that she couldn't think and that if she had a moment of silence, she could figure out why she was upset. She was able to come back to me and communicate exactly what was the point where we had a miscommunication.

So then, if we were fighting, I would give her a few minutes before we would continue talking - and you know what? Our fights wouldn't last nearly as long. It was then that I learned that giving someone space wasn't a bad thing and it didn't mean you don't care and it doesn't mean they won't come back... Sometimes... People just need the quiet..."

✧

RIVER

'I can't believe I've already been back to Ellis for a week and haven't been to work.'

The day after I got back from the trip, I couldn't leave the house because of all the journalists sitting around the apartment so I thought I'd give myself a day of rest. I changed into sweatpants, closed the blinds, and laid in bed until my mind drifted back to sleep.

I woke up in the late evening to a few text updates from Dustin and texted Stephanie back but when I got up, I realized I actually felt worse than before. Somehow, my exhaustion level plummeted and any small amount of energy I must have had, evaporated.

My thoughts whirled any moment I was conscious. I couldn't escape them.

'I was more honest and open and vulnerable with Dustin than I had ever been with anyone in my whole life, so why doesn't he trust me?'

'Who was it? Was it Dustin? Cas? Someone from here? I've known these people my whole life, would they really betray me and my safety that way? What would they get out of that?'

Suddenly, my small, dingy surroundings didn't feel so safe but there was absolutely nothing I could do about it. I woke up the next day in the middle of the afternoon. I didn't have to work until next week because I had taken Dustin's advice of taking some time off but now, I had no idea what to do with myself.

I laid in my bed, staring at the dark wet spots that had formed on my walls.

'I could write...' I thought. 'About what, though? Love? Romance? How could I when my own love life was in shambles?'

Images flashed through my mind. Images of Dustin. His lips, his jaw, his eyes... My guts plummeted. It's only been a few days but I already missed his touch and the way he filled up a room even when he wasn't saying or doing anything.

'He doesn't trust me... Have I done something...?'

I had little tools to cope with the sudden absence. So another beer eventually got dumped down my throat...

'Well, you are a piece of shit boyfriend anyway! You can hardly pay for anything. Not to mention he's been so open and vulnerable with you, have you told him anything about yourself other than you're trans and you like to write?

He doesn't know about your family, your relationships... He's right, he's never even read your writing! Maybe that's a good step to being vulnerable. I could show him some writing... But what if he hates it or makes fun of it? Worse, what if he's indifferent? You know what? He's never asked to read anything so maybe it's not a good idea...'

"UGH!"

That was the first time I had heard my own voice in days.

I stared at my blank notebook. It felt like it was torturing me more than my thoughts, so I tucked myself into bed once again and tried my best to create a happy world in my mind to drift away to.

The next day, a jolt of energy zipped through my body when I received a text from Stephanie.

"River!! The paparazzi have been gone for days, what do you say we get you out of the house tonight?"

As much as I felt wary about going out with anyone in Ellis right now, I couldn't keep sitting under this roof with my own thoughts.

"OK," I texted. "I miss you :("

"I miss you too sweetie. How's 9:30 sound?"

"Perfect,"

"I'll come by your place then."

✧

Stephanie had come over a few minutes earlier than she told me she would. She said she had something to tell me before we went out and what she told me would unknowingly set the mood for the rest of the night.

Part of me is kind of thankful I had already started drinking. It numbed me to the pain of her words and when she suggested I didn't drink when we went out. I felt attacked at the suggestion, but when she said she could see I was hurting and that the drinking wasn't the answer, I knew she was just trying to help. So I didn't.

"Just a pitcher of Bud and 3 glasses," Gil ordered as we sat at the beat-up table at Triple S. I stared down at the graffiti drawn and carved into the wood and memories of our first official date flooded my mind.

"Make that one glass, I'm driving and River's not drinking," said Stephanie before ordering us a pizza with a smile.

"Wowww, pussies."

"Ugh," Stephanie rolled her eyes for the both of us. "Remind me why we hang out with you?"

"Because I'm so handsome?" said Gil, actually bringing a smile to my face for the first time in a while.

"Whatever you say," Stephanie laughed. "How did you do this semester?"

"Fine, same shit different year ya know?" Gil groaned, downing his beer.

I felt like such a third wheel, but thoughts of Stephanie's plan flooded my thoughts and a sudden, reassuring air overwhelmed me.

"I, for one, am ready to forget about this semester," I said, clanking my glass of water against Gil's. "Who wants to pick out some songs with me? My treat."

"Ohh, I'm not really in the mood," Steph huffed. "Gil, you go with him. I'll stay here and make sure no one takes our table."

Gil and I got up, and I could tell he was already feeling the booze in his veins because he wrapped his arm around my shoulder. His face was abnormally close to mine and his eyes were glossy.

"Let's get this place hoppin', brother!"

'Ugh, barf.' I thought.

I wrapped my arm around Gil and steadied him as we stood at the jukebox and I slid in a few dollars. I watched Gil scroll through the music for a moment before my eyes glanced toward Stephanie at our booth. She shook her head with her eyes wide as she gazed down at Gil's phone.

"Howzzat?" Gil asked, thankfully not paying any attention to me whatsoever. Steph looked up at me mouthing, 'not yet' and I instantly turned back to Gil.

"Hmmm, wait wait, I think we should pick a few more, it's not like anyone else is pickin' any good music today," I laughed, slipping another few dollars in the machine.

"Ya gotta point!" Gil scrolled through for a few more minutes and I silently groaned at every song he picked but he was thankfully too drunk to notice.

I glanced back at Stephanie who gave me a thumbs-up, smiling a little too innocently.

"Good?" Gil asked.

"Perfect! Yes, let's go eat like kings!"

"Waid, I gotta piss,"

"OK, I'll meet ya back at the table,"

Once Gil disappeared around the corner I bolted back to the booth.

"Quick, while he's in the bathroom. What'd you get?"

Stephanie's eyes glazed over and I could tell she was feeling apprehensive.

"What?"

"I can't say anything for sure but there are a ton of calls to New York and weird texts to the same number. Don't worry I got it all on here," Steph said, holding her own phone up. "We'll do some digging when you and I get back to my place but for now, let's eat. The sooner we finish, the sooner we can leave."

"We're going back to your place?"

"I wouldn't leave you alone, River. Especially not with that prick."

I squeezed her hand across the table, a small sense of security having been restored within me.

✧

"Are you ready?" Steph asked.

We planted ourselves on the floor of her bedroom, with pictures and notes sprawled about like we had become citizen detectives of our own true crime.

I nodded.

Stephanie had entered the number to New York she had found so many calls to in Gil's phone and pressed call.

My stomach plummeted to new lows as the phone rang.

Ring!

Pause.

Ring!

Pause.

Ring!

I don't know how many times the phone rang. No one picked up, but we eventually reached the mystery person's voicemail.

"Hi, this is Jeff Lewis. Sorry I missed your call, but leave me a message and I'll try to get back to you."

Steph hung up quickly before we got a chance to make an awful voicemail and scribbled his name on a sheet of paper.

"Jeff Lewis? Who the hell is Jeff Lewis?" I asked.

"I'm not sure, but that name sounds vaguely familiar."

Steph typed into her phone with the speed of someone who's been doing it their whole life. She gasped.

"What?" I asked.

Stephanie showed me her brightly lit screen with who knows how many search results.

"Jeff Lewis, Editor-In-Chief of The Oracle Insider since 2004. Previously the editor of Puffington Host"

"So Gil sent texts to this Jeff Lewis guy, he asks when he'll be compensated for his info..."

"I think it's pretty safe to say that Gil's the one, huh?" I said. The feeling was bittersweet and I was obviously glad that we had finally found out who did it, but to find out that it was someone so close...

"River, I'm so sorry. Are you OK?"

"I'm OK. This might sound weird but... I think I've always suspected he disliked me for some reason or had it out for me... I don't know. Are you OK? I know how close you and Gil are..."

"Were. I can't keep treating someone like family when I know things like this happen.." Steph said as her face grew red. The whole town knows Steph and Gil are practically siblings. Their families are so close, their siblings are so close.

"What are you gonna do?" I asked.

Stephanie shrugged.

"About Gil? There's nothing for me to do. All I can do is back you up and make my place known. He'll understand that I'm done with him after that. What are you gonna do?"

"About Gil or Dustin?"

"Both."

"Gil... I mean, I don't have another choice but to talk to him about it, I mean I live with the guy and he's clearly not going to come out and tell me..."

"And with Dustin?"

I scribbled mindlessly on our sheets and sheets of notes, drawing a black circle over and over again.

"This whole thing got so blown out of proportion but I still can't help but dwell on the idea that he doesn't fully trust me..." My voice got quieter. "After this whole thing with Gil, seeing how people you've known your whole life can just turn on you, I don't really blame him because he's been dealing with this since he was a kid. But how do I earn his trust?"

Stephanie tucked her golden blonde hair behind her ears while her posture slumped and a loud sigh escaped her lips.

"If there's anything I've learned about trust and relationships, it's that some trust is earned over time and some trust is earned with action. I think you two have to understand what trust means to you and how you know you trust someone and move from there. It's OK to have your walls up with all you two have been through and especially because your relationship is so fresh, but over time, maybe... Reward yourselves for reaching milestones with each other."