Matt and Jason Ch. 05

I swear that was the longest day of my fucking life.

I mean, I couldn't help but feel wildly self-conscious, wearing Matt's clothes at work. Wearing... his underwear. Fuck, I had a new appreciation for the movie "Bull Durham," with Nuke wearing ladies' garters on the mound. It wasn't all bad... for one, I'd have to admit that Matt had better style than me. More to the point, the image of his dick having previously filled out those boxer briefs...yeah, I was just this shy of walking around with a boner all fucking day.

But that wasn't the only thing gnawing at my thoughts. I... I mean... well, I'd been having gay sex. A lot of it. Me. A fucking bastard who had never looked at a guy that way in my life, and was famous for mowing down the ladies. I was having gay sex. And I loved it. I fucking loved it.

Oh my fucking GOD I loved it.

And all that was sending my thoughts exploding in a thousand different directions, all at once.

Jesus. A week ago I would have never thought it possible. I would have laughed in your face if you suggested it. Hell, depending on how much I had been drinking, maybe I would have decked you. But when push came to shove, I didn't have any second thoughts. Not even the slightest hesitation.

And what did all this say about me, really? That I was an equal-opportunity lech? That I'd always been gay and was just repressing it? Would any other long-held convictions blow up the minute I tested them? Was I that fickle?

...Would whatever I had going on with Matt blow up the minute some different hottie walked into our hangout?

And what would people say if they knew? I had lived my whole world in a man's man world, where quips about being gay had been thrown around, recycled, and thrown around again. Would my buddies... change... if they knew?

God, and what about my co-workers? In some ways, they were even... more... unreconstructed than my buddies. Especially towards the low guy on the totem pole. Which I most certainly still was.

I mean, shit, were they figuring it out already? Did anything... show? Were the guys at work sizing me up like I was a $10 whore? Snickering the minute I left the room?

Panic started to simmer inside me, but as the day went on, nothing really happened. The only comments the guys threw my way were irritated barks to get my head back in the game... justifiably so. My thoughts were so disjointed, I was completely distracted from what I was doing. Thinking about... Matt.

Matt.

Man... he wormed his way into everything. Memories tripped by the stupidest thing would suddenly explode into real life. Memories of him. Being with him. It wasn't just his dick, it was... him. Everything. His half-smile. It was never a smirk--he wasn't that... harsh. Such a chill guy. Such a great guy. No, it was just a humorous half-smile that with such little effort I could pull into the biggest, laughingest shit-eating grin you've ever seen. A grin that fucking lit up the room. And then there was his beard. I'd never... you know, played with a guy's beard before. The way my stubble fascinated him. That feeling of his hand as he ran his fingers across my jaw, almost in wonderment. The friction when we were together. Friction. The way....

...the way his cockhead pushed through me, lighting me up from the inside. His cock when....

Shit. Okay... so maybe I was thinking about his dick, too.

Fuck, here I was at work, barely working, just pacing around like a tiger in a cage. When I did sit down, my leg involuntarily started bouncing wildly, making the desk vibrate. Thinking about him was torture. But not thinking about him wasn't an option.

At least I wasn't writing notes to him, like I was some goddamn school kid. At least I hadn't stooped that low.

Oh shit... speaking of that, I should text him and confirm I can still stop by after work and pick up my clothes. And, you know, see how his day's going, and....

Wait. Fuck. FUCK!

Christ on a cross. It was like puberty all over again. Like the first time I saw my Middle School teacher Miss Sommers and realized she wasn't wearing a bra. What really blew my mind is that even having experienced it before, I was responding in exactly the same way as before. My body was responding in exactly the same way. Even if it was a guy this time, and not Miss Sommers. Shit. I was too old, too cool, too experienced for a crush. Or was this just like a phase? Was this something I was going to go through again and again? Like, was I going to have my world rocked like every 10 years or so, out of the blue?

Or was...

...was Matt something... special?

Shit. What was going on with Matt? Were we just fucking around, excited about the newness of the whole thing? Excited about how it was all taboo and all?

I shook off the question, I mean... Jesus, we were way, way, WAY too early in the game to think about that. What good could possibly come from trying to label us? Label what we were doing. I mean... get a grip, Jason. Quit overthinking. What's wrong with you? You never used to spiral like this. Jesus. Just enjoy the ride.

Riding him.

Shit.

I leaned back and let myself remember... remember the feeling as Matt and I collided. The fucking feel of us. Our eyes locked. His hairy...

A co-worker came in, and I slammed my body back to attention. He looked at me. "What the fuck, Jason? You've either been running around with your hair on fire or drifting off into la-la land. You fucking score last night or what?"

The blunt directness of the question blew past all my defenses. I could do nothing but blush ruby red.

Which only made the remainder of the day even more nightmarish. The guys were all over me, trying to suss out the gory details. Imagining what, um, "she" looked like. What "she" was like. Juicing up their own dull sex lives by living through mine.

Jesus. Men, sometimes. I tell you....

I gave just enough details to keep them happy--enough that the goddamn fuckers were probably gonna go jerk off in the bathroom stalls as it was--but I obviously kept several of the key details secret, or just vague enough that they could fill in the details themselves. Easier that way.

But just talking through things was... hard. In more than one way. Emotionally. Physically. Erectionally. Shit, I had gone from a semi to a full-on boner, and was hoping against hope I wasn't leaking enough precum to make a wet spot in my pants.

In... Matt's pants.

Shit. That didn't help.

Fortunately, all this shit went down towards the end of the day. Quitting time finally came--well, close enough--and I was able to bolt for the door, with the hoots and knowing hollers of my co-workers ringing in my ears as they cheered me on. Matt and I never set up specifics for meeting after work, but I wanted to at least scoot over to his place and get my clothes.

Oh, who the hell am I kidding. I wanted to scoot over to his place and get OUT of my clothes.

By the time I left work, I was so fucking horny I could have bitten through steel. Bragging to the guys about how I had gotten lucky had put everything front-and-center in my mind. Matt's place was only a short hop away from my work, but the minutes stretched to what felt like hours because of ALL THE FUCKING TRAFFIC MOVE YOUR GODDAMN ASSES YOU STUPID FUCKS OR I WILL FUCKING END YOU. All I could see in my mind's eye was Matt's hairy body, drenched in sex sweat. With that half-smile, cocky with satisfaction. I was only dimly paying attention to the road. Thank God I didn't kill anybody. My pits and palms were sweaty, my dick was about to rip a hole in my clothes, and my leg was bouncing so violently, it about made the whole car shake.

What the hell was wrong with me? No one had ever... hit me like that. I mean, I was fucking rocking in my car seat, physically reaching my ass out, just thinking about Matt's dick spearing me. My hole clamping reflexively at his imagined cock. I've never been so worked up in my fucking life. Not even my first time. With a woman.

I did a piss-poor job of parking, and fucking ran to his door like a thousand screaming demons were in hot pursuit. My fist pounding against his door. Horny. So fucking horny....

Matt finally threw the door open and I fucking slammed into the guy, nearly knocking us both over.

God, I hope he didn't have company over.

I'll say it again... it's so fucking different being with a guy. Especially a real guy like Matt. My excitement/desperation would have flattened any woman I've ever known. Matt not only stood his ground, but as he smashed his lips against mine, he actually flattened me against the door, slamming it shut behind me as our collective wight pressed against it.

We kissed so violently that one of us drew blood, swirling that tell-tale metallic taste into our passion (teeth, Jason, teeth... you stupid fuck!). We fucking ground against each other, hard as fuck... with our dicks hard as fuck. Fucking each other with our clothes on. Our hands were everywhere, with grips of steel, as we leveraged for support and just luxuriated in the fucking feel of each other.

I put my hands on his pecs and roughly pushed him away, almost sending him staggering back. He looked momentarily confused until I dropped to my knees and all but ripped open his pants. His Jockeys were wet with precum. I hauled them down and fucking drove my face into his hairy crotch. Breathing in so hard I was fucking gasping, desperate for his musk. The smell of his balls fucking ripping my mind open.

The fucking smell of sex. MAN sex.

I pulled back and fucking slammed my mouth down his cock, swallowing him down as hard and as fast as I could. Sucking like my life depended on it. From Matt's bellowed roars, I knew he was into it. I went at him so hard and fast that his knees buckled slightly, and he fell forward a bit, grabbing my head and shoulders for support. I fucking went to town on him, knowing how he liked it. How he needed it. Mouth-fucking him, teasing his cockhead with my tongue, tickling his piss slit. Driving down hard, again and again, deep enough that I was all but gagging and forcing me back. My spit ran down his shaft. I took his balls into my mouth, sucking them hard--hard enough to make the man squirm. Smelling them as I went, fucking needing it. Needing it all. Making his dick mine.

Matt was totally into it, his whole body rippling in time with mine as I sucked him, but he needed more. He reached down and grabbed me under my armpits, then hauled me to my feet, slamming my shoulders against the door. He laid on a kiss hard enough to stop traffic, as his hand clumsily wrenched my belt open, then pulled my pants and underwear down in one massive jerk.

Then he went after my dick, even harder than I went after his.

I mean, holy fuck. It was a good thing he had all but pinned me against the door, as I doubt I could have stood upright. God... all I can say is I hope someday you can find a cocksucker as enthusiastic as Matt was... it's an experience every guy should have. Matt was fucking living for my dick, going after it with thunder and rage, and a desperate hunger. Mouth-fucking me hard, sucking me down. Swallowing my shaft, playing with the head. Fucking inhaling my balls and rolling them around in his mouth. Over and over, in rapid-fire succession, keeping me wildly off my toes. I was bucking against him, needing more. Desperate for more.

Then to my befuddled surprise, he spun me around harshly. He roughly wrenched one leg free of my pants and spread my legs. Oh fuck... he was gonna....

YES! The motherfucker buried his face in my hairy ass and fucking feasted on me. FUCK. He was like a rabid Grizzley Bear, fucking making out with my pucker, ramming his tongue inside me as far as it would go. Wildly swinging his head, and fucking shredding my skin with his beard. Huge licks up and down my crack. I roared out my passion; trying to encourage him... although my words collapsed into garbled raw animal sounds. I pushed hard against him, desperate for more of his mouth... more, more, FUCKING MORE. I realized that sound I kept hearing was me screaming out "FUCKMEFUCKMEFUCKMEFUCKME!"

Matt's mouth came off me with nearly an audible "pop." I couldn't see what he was doing, but it was like he fished something out of his pocket and then stepped out of his pants entirely. There was a vulgar splatter of a sound, and then... POW! He slammed his rock-hard dick up inside me, his balls to my balls.

I belted out a gasping cry. That fucking incredible first thrill of penetration! But... weirdly enough, it was so fucking easy. Surprisingly easy. My brain was reeling, as Matt slammed my shoulders into the door, my left cheek flat against it. His hand pressed against me, and his bearded face pressed tightly against my ear. "Like that? I got some lube on my way home. No excuses any more... now, we're gonna REALLY fuck!" He roughly licked my ear, and my knees quivered.

And then Matt fucked the shit out of me.

It felt strange, and FUCKING WONDERFUL. There was next to no resistance as his dick powered through me, his head finding my magic spot and setting my body on fire. GOD that fucking golden light FILLED ME. My hair standing on end, my skin shivering. That fucking FIRE as Matt slammed into me, again and again, AGAIN AND AGAIN. Rougher than ever before, rougher than I thought possible, with the lube creating a frictionless glide. I was fucking screaming like a bitch in heat. Sweating. Sweating like a fucking pig. Power strokes ripping though me. Matt slowed, and ground his hips against my hairy ass, like a fucking obscene hula dance, getting his dick inside every possible part of me. Opening me. Setting off fireworks in my mind even brighter than the light already flooding through me. As much as I could, I slammed my ass back against him, reaching around with one hand to try and open myself up so he could drive in deeper. Needing, fucking NEEDING his dick. There was nothing but his dick and my ass.

Matt started slamming against me. Whole body slams, like he was using my body as a battering ram to break down his own door. His arm looped around my chest for extra leverage. Pounding me, fucking POUNDING me, harder than fuck. Pressed against me, mashing my face against the door. My body on absolute fire. Roaring as flames exploded out of control. Fire. RAW FIRE. It was like I was cumming, but the feeling kept going. Fire. Roaring. More. MORE. My balls churning. FIRE. Finally, a cascade of nuclear explosions in my mind as I lost all control. I screamed out a braying cry as I blasted a bucketful of cum all over his front door.

That just got Matt even more worked up.

My mind was in a haze, but moments later I realized I was laying on the floor, chewing his carpet, while Matt hauled up my ass and fucking POUNDED me. Faster than I thought possible. I could fucking feel his cockhead rip through me, setting my guts on fire. Each blow landing like a plane crash. Fast. FAST. FASTFASTFASTFASTFASTFAST. I screamed, no other recourse. I hadn't even come down from shooting my load; the explosions in my mind just kept building. And he kept pounding. Our bodies slapping together, his balls all but ricocheting off me with each hammer stroke. My still-hard dick slapping against my stomach from the impact. FASTFASTFASTFASTFAST. My entire being was on fire.

Then, I couldn't believe it... I could feel my body rising up all over again, readying....

And I fucking came all over again.

Matt's body responded, as my ass clenched down on his cock. His hammer strokes became wilder, less rhythmic, and I could feel his hands dig into me. A low wailing sound was building inside him, taking off a thunderous roar... and Matt exploded. I could feel his dick jerk inside me as he shot load after load of white-hot cum deep inside me.

One with me.

God, my body didn't know what to do with itself. Muscles spasming. A ringing in my ears. Seeing spots. It almost felt like I had been pummeled in an inch of my life... but underneath everything I felt like I was burning with LIFE. Like Frankenstein's monster on the operating table after being brought to life by lightening. Fucking ALIVE.

The fucking FEELING.

Matt and I made out for what felt like an hour... just thrilling at the feel of each other. Clothes half-on, half-off. Our hair drenched in sweat. Hairy legs entangled. Cum oozing everywhere. It was the ugliest romantic scene possible. And the most beautiful.

At some point, I looked at Matt. Amazed by him. Amazed at me with him. But there was the real world out there, and real-world commitments. Damn.

"Okay dude," I murmured. "This is the happiest I've ever been in my life, but I can't spend the night again. If nothing else, I have to get some actual sleep--I've got a major project to finish and today was pretty much a waste. Another day like today, and my boss will flay me alive."

Matt looked on with that half-smile, and a comically displeased demeanor. "Tssk. That figures. You men are all alike. Ten or twelve quick ones, and they just roll over and go to sleep on you."

I punched his arm and we started laughing. "Jesus Christ, man. You have officially rocked my world. It's so bizarre--wonderful, but bizarre--to fuck around with someone so... enthusiastic for sex. I mean... holy shit!"

Matt beamed. "I don't know if it's that way with all guys, or just you, but I know what you mean. Alicia was one extreme, but even when I was with 'high sex drive' women, nothing compares with what you throw down. What you push me to throw down. You're fucking amazing."

"Can I ask a question?" I ventured.

"Shoot."

"Just curious. Do you... well, do you like... you know, getting fucked or doing the fucking better?"

Matt paused, and looked off into the distance. After a second, he smirked and looked me in the eye. "I think its whichever one I'm doing in the moment."

I snorted derisively. "Talk about a cop out of an answer."

"Well, what about you?"

I reflected. I had been thinking about that very question quite a bit. "Well, the only reason I'm not gonna bust your chops about that answer is that mine is pretty much the same. When I fuck you... damn! It feels like I'm king of the world. Roaring with power. Gonna fucking take you and make you like it. But when you fuck me.... shit, it's like nothing I've ever felt in my life. You set my whole body on fire. Like I'm all but cumming the entire time, for like an hour straight. And when I do actually shoot, it's like cumming on another level. I feel like I'm finally alive. But then again, I feel that way when I'm pounding that hairy ass of yours, too. Like... I don't know. But also, it's like the biggest rush fucking you and seeing it on your face how into it you are."

Matt broke out the biggest, goofiest grin I'd seen. "I know what you mean, bud. The thing is... when I'm fucking you, God, you are fucking into it! Every part of you... it's in your eyes, your whole face, your entire body. Like, you're fucking glowing or something. It's like every single thing I do is driving you wild. It's such an intense connection... and the rush of knowing I'm doing that to you. It makes me feel..." Matt's voice caught, just for a second. "It makes me feel like the biggest stud on the planet." He paused longer, and went on in a nearly broken voice. "Like I'm a fucking stud. After Alicia... I didn't know how much I needed that. To feel like... a man again. To feel... desirable again. To feel... shit... like, I'm sexy again."

I think my heart broke a little for Matt right then, knowing what he had just been going through with his ex. Not just the break-up, but even before. I remember being cheated on, and how it shredded your confidence. Made you question so many things about yourself, especially sexual performance. It took me a very long time to come to terms with that, all the while denying there was a problem. I was... touched with his honesty. His vulnerability.