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Over and again, my fans of incestuous erotica tell me their sad stories of how they were incestuously used and sexually abused too. Traumatized and stigmatized by the experience, they tell me that they too were so incestuously used and sexually abused by their mother, their father, their sister, their brother, their cousin, their uncle, their aunt, their grandmother, and/or their grandfather. They tell me that what happened to them left an indelible mark on their personalities and that they'll never been the same person they were before having the incestuous sexual experience.
As survivors of incest and as if we're all members of an incest survivor club, is incest something we're all doomed to repeat? Vicariously reading while being stuck in the Twilight Zone and sexually fantasizing about having sex with our blood relatives, are those who were victims of incest drawn to read incestuous erotica in the way that I'm doomed to write incestuous erotica? Thinking that I understood why I am who I am, incest is something I can't always compute. I don't fully understand why I have the need and the urge to write such incestuous mother and son erotica. Is it because of my mother having sex with my brothers that I feel so compelled to write and rewrite the mother and son incestuous experiences as stories that never end? Being that I'm one of my brother's daughters, is incest in my DNA? Is incest my Hell on Earth and I'm doom to repeat it by writing it?
Not having a son to lust over, I don't even have any children. I wanted children but my ex didn't. He had a vasectomy without telling me. How about that? Can you imagine doing that to your wife while knowing that she wants a child? Yet, there was an ulterior motive to him having a vasectomy.
Instead of having children and raising a family, he pressured me to participate in the swinging lifestyle. Then, suddenly jealously possessive over me and who I slept with, when I received more attention from men than he received from women, he was done swinging. We spent two years trying to have a child before he confessed and told me that he had a vasectomy. I was devastated. I was done with him. Our marriage was over.
Notwithstanding my longstanding puzzled confusion, my having such incestuous, sexual thoughts all makes sense to me now. Those tortured people who write me that they're incest survivors too, just as I was, were bitten by a vampire too. Controlled by incest, we're all incestuous zombies. Those of us who have been so incestuously abused and sexually used, those of us who think that we've survived the incestuous, sexual abuse, think that they're healed but we're not.
We're not healed. We're broken. We're not normal. We're abnormal. We're all twisted in such a way that we continue to embrace incest in our lives by reading it and, in my case, by writing it. Instead of recoiling from incest and rejecting such perversely sexual thoughts, after doing the dirty deeds we were forced to do, incestuous sex is as normal to us in the way that incestuous sex is as abnormal to those who have escaped being forced and/or coerced to have sex with a blood relative. God help us because only he can.
Unfortunately, unable to stop from reading incestuous stories, those of us who have had incestuous sex are all doomed to relive the experience again through the eyes of someone else while reading their incestuous stories. As if waiting to die on death row, we're all waiting to read our next, best incestuous story or, in my case, to write my next, best incestuous story. Condemned to Hell by our attraction to incest and to all things that are incestuous, newly deemed disciples of the Devil, when once we were all so innocent, we're all playing with fire in the Devil's playground now. Just as the women think about sleeping with their sons, brothers, fathers, uncles, cousins, and grandfathers, the men fantasize of bedding their daughters, sisters, mothers, aunts, cousins, and grandmothers. Where does it end? Is it all an unending and an unbreakable incestuous cycle of abuse.
So many fans have asked me why I write incestuous erotica and why I write so many mother and son stories. Thinking that I knew the reason and had the answer, I smugly told them all the same thing. I told them to read my story, Why I Write Incestuous Erotica. I told them that just as they were, I was bitten by a vampire too. I always believed the answers were there in that incestuously disturbing story but they're not. Damaged long before that even happened to me with my uncle and cousin incestuously abusing me and sexually using me and my brothers continuing where my uncle and cousin left off, I was wrong.
I always thought the reason why I write incestuous erotica was because, bitten by a vampire, my uncle and cousin incestuously abused me and sexually used me. After having been forced to have sex with my uncle and cousin, I thought the reason why I'm so twisted today is because my brothers had their wicked way with my naked body. Fucking me and forcing me to suck them, six men who were supposed to love, honor, and protect me, I thought they all were the reason why I write incestuous erotica today but I was wrong.
After thinking long and hard about all that happened to me so long ago, I think the reason why I write incestuous erotica and especially mother and son incest stories stems from growing up with my whore of a mother and my perversely perverted four, much older brothers. An innocent victim, I was forced to concede that I'm a product of my environment. My family life is what has shaped and molded me. My prostitute of a mother and perverted brothers are the reason why I'm the woman I am today.
To be continued...
- COMMENTS
Blromaover 2 years agoTruth is odd. My mother and myself have been attracted to each other. My parents divorced when I was young. Well I looked just like my dad. Thing is I am kind, gentle, very loving. I help everyone. My mother would kiss me more than a peck. At times it would become a deep kiss. When I was older she let it know that she was having thoughts a mother should not have. Were were playing backgammon on a Saturday morning and she was in hose and this one piece thing. All I had to do was say something. I didn't because I knew she would regret it later. I would have loved it!
Kinkyric82about 4 years agoThank you, I made the mistake of only giving you 1 star should of been 5, me and my mother are lovers have been for 20 years
Lee0413about 4 years agoFirst, you are not broken you went thru the fire and came out whole....they are broken....let me say that I am not an incest survivor but it is my goto erotica...I grew up in an Ozzie n Harriet kind of home but I still came out addicted to see and especially incestuous stories. You are a strong person to have gone through what you did and not just given up and let them continue using you. I just wanted you to know (and I think you already do) that you are a Survivor. Wishing you only the best !!!
bbwdoggover 4 years agoI respect and understand that this is therapy for you, this is a way for you to make what happened less demonized and a form of control is placed where you would have needed it. Then again I may be wrong, but I appreciate your time and effort spent here. I've always preferred the written word for my filth 😁, you're characters are coming from places that are seen everyday but overlooked for the unease that it causes folks to see. The first series of your stories I read are about the ex marine and lady collecting cans that gets attacked and I still read them sometimes. Don't let the negativity get to you, keep up the awesome work 👍
Jackspeed2uover 5 years agoYour story is just paragraph after paragraph of fucking ranting, I just gave up. I initially tried skipping all the rant at the start but you can’t. The rant just goes on and on and on, you also drop little story details in now and again, so if I don’t read the rant I’ll miss details.
Why the fuck would I read a rant? It’s as if your yelling at ME, so why would I continue to read it. Get over yourself and tell a story or just fuck off.
darkdance69about 7 years agoI am sorry for the pain in your past. Stories like this keep me from ever seriously considering incest IRL. I mean I do constantly fantasize about consensual incest between adults, but let's be honest, we all know about the pain that can come from these relationships. So my incest daydreams will remain in my fantasies and far away from anyone who might be harmed by them.
Shouldiagain2about 8 years agoI admit that I answered a lot of your questions, even though I suspect they were rhetorical. I have fantasized about some female family members. Although I have never felt that way about my mother, one of my biggest turn-on's and role playing scenario's involve an older woman, playing as my Mom. I think it is sexy, just because it is so taboo. However, when it turns to rape or non-consent, then I cannot get on board with that. You are a product of a consentual, incestuous relationship and you are a victim as well, for that I am sorry. You have seen things that you should not have, and that has shaped your view of things and behavior of your adult life.
arkwolfover 10 years agoYet, now that I know that I'm a product of incestuous sex, I wonder if what happened to me, happened to someone else too. with this being said I was wondering if this iis a true story. I have been in a few consensual incest relationships, with my nieces, that were just a couple years younger than me at their instigation. I married, divorced my 2nd cousin. I wanted my stepsister but she said no, either due to being stepsiblings or the 14 year age gap she never said
tacobell1over 10 years agoWow. i wish and hope you have coped well despite the circumstances.
I hope there are as few of you too, and those few having a constructive outlet as writing.
As a son, and as a reader of incestuous erotica. i have never been subjected to any abuse/trauma in my childhood, not if you count losing a toy or failing math. Nor as a growing teenager have i fantasized about (gah) my mom. minus a weird vague dream that left a lousy taste in my mouth and off incest reading for a while. but i came back to the taboo erotica. i have no idea why. its not "MY" mother. but the idea of carnal relation between a curvy buxom mom and her son. does that make me even more sick since i have no reason?? i don't seem to have a psychological issue but i get off on incest???? I love submissive moms who cater to every need for their child. maybe because i wasn't affectionately loved by my mother through my growing years. that in reverse i crave it more??? right now i am at best a good son who helps his mother who looks at me as equal. nothing more. that doesn;t seem right either since i wasn't starved for love respect and affection from the rest of the family.
sorry for the long post. but reading this got me thinking "why incest"?
rjbalmosabout 11 years agoMay I offer my sympathies to you for the trauma you suffered both before and after you left home. I applaud your courage to share your life with others so that you and others can understand and cope with the issues and feelings that are forming your life both past and present and I admire and appreciate your stories. Most of us that have never had such experiences do have these fantasies and appreciate stories like yours without knowing if they are fantasy stories or true life experiences so we can only appreciate the stories and the efforts of the authors. So as a fantasy side person I would like to thank you for your efforts. I do believe it is true that most people probably do exaggerate their stories or they are sometimes complete fantasies. But I am sure, just as you are, that there are more true life experiences being conveyed that can ever be verified simply because some people see sex as sex, regardless of who it is with, not just incest, they most likely live by the feelings that if it feels good then do it regardless of the consequences. I am glad you are able to cope and create, and I wish you the best in your future and thank you for stories.
stealth311about 11 years agoI have had incestious fantasies my entire life. I used to peek at my mother and my older sister in the shower when I was younger.
I appreciate the fact that your honest and self-aware. To me, while nobody deserves the experiences that made you who you are today, being able to write, and publish your most personal feelings and experiences, and not just write them down and throw them away, shows me that you are ok with it on some level. If that means that you understand what happened to you and have grown from your experiences, great. If it means that your ok with what happened and you now enjoy fucking your uncle, brother or son, great. Embrace who you are. You have no reason to be ashamed.
As long as you dont abuse others, get off however you need to. I'd happily play son to your mommy anyday, just ask...
Matt
yahoo id - Stealth31172
stealth31172@yahoo.com
JimJam2012about 11 years agoI was molested when I was 8 by a neighborhood boy who I looked up to. I thought he was cool & he was wanting to hang out with me. He was 12 or 13. Well, he started making me suck his dick & then after awhile I was fingering him. Then he started fingering my ass. I stopped it when he tried to fuck me. He threatened to kill me if I told anybody but after I finally stood up to him & got him to stop I got really paranoid that he was going to tell everybody that I was gay. After almost a year of almost non stop molestation by another boy, I was more worried about what he'd say than about him maybe forcing himself on me. After a few years & we started going to different schools I stopped worrying about it. When I got older, although very straight, I started watching copious amounts of gay porn. To this day I'll watch a lot of gay porn yet I've never done anything with another guy since I was 9 when I finally stopped it. I believe it is our subconscious minds trying to somehow change the memory &/or the experience to make it more positive in our minds so we no longer feel shame or bad about it. A defense mechanism. I've known plenty of men & women who were abused or molested who years later were suddenly having crushes on the men or women who abused them. I dated a woman who had been molested by her father from until she was in high school. She confided in me that after she graduated college, she found herself desiring him. She went back home & basically seduced him & they had a consensual affair until he got sick with cancer & couldn't anymore. She felt bad but I reassured her that it was her mind telling her to take control & make it a positive experience (even though it's still twisted) so she would no longer feel bad & ashamed about what happened when she was a kid. Plus, you're always going to feel a strong emotional attachment to your first. No matter who it is.
gperry2843over 11 years agoI can tell by what is said and what you are not allowed to share that this can nowhere come close to describing the trauma in your life.
stuwatcher52over 11 years agoTalk about hitting the nail on the head-this story hits home in so many ways and really gets a person to thinking about family life and what really goes on behind closed doors. I have complete admiration for Susan to be able to get this off her chest and into a sensitive read. While maybe it's opened up some old wounds for me, at least I can say that I feel more like talking or writing about even if it's only in my personal journal and that therapy makes me realize the way life is for my particular episodes. I look forward to most all of SJP's writings, but especially the next chapter(s). Susan has the talent to write intelligently and I for one don't need the sex acts or words to enjoy what she is trying to get across. :) the bird
slayerv69over 11 years agoI feel where your coming from and understand. I feel that due to our frustration with what happened and where we are in our lives we need a way to express our feelings. And due to what happened the best way to deliver that is sexually. Whether it be in writing, role playing, or what have you. This is by far the healthiest way to expressing it, and you shouldn't feel ashamed doing so.
