More than Just Surviving

Disclaimer: I do not own The 100. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Author's note: This story takes place at the end of Season 4.

*****

"Clarke, it's okay."

"Shut up Raven." Clarke snapped.

"Just let me die." Raven whimpered in exhaustion and pain.

"No! You're not allowed to die! Do you hear me Raven?" Clarke yelled, before softly adding, "You came back to save me. I can't let you die."

"You kept saving everyone." Raven said weakly, "It's about time somebody saved you."

"You did." Clarke said softly, "You saved us both."

*

Clarke and Raven had some version of that conversation over and over again, which was extremely worrying. Raven normally refused to give up, regardless how bleak the circumstances were, but things for her had never been worse, so Clarke thought it was understandable. Either that or the radiation was already frying Raven's brain.

Either way it wasn't helpful. But they would both probably be dead if Raven hadn't insisted on driving out after Clarke as soon as she found out Clarke's jeep was attacked and damaged, ensuring that they could get to the satellite dish so their friends could escape. More to the point, it allowed them to get back to the relative safety of the underground lab, where they would at least be safe from the initial wave of Praimfaya.

The problem now was the radiation which was killing Raven fast, and even with the Night Blood running through her veins Clarke's skin was burning and her insides felt like they were melting. It was a miracle that they were still awake, let alone could move around, but somehow through sheer stubborn determination Clarke was able to get Raven to lie down on a table and find a syringe so she could just start using it as a blood transfer device.

It was a truly desperate attempt to save her friend's life, and might even endanger her own, but it was all Clarke could do at that moment, and she just couldn't let Raven die. She just couldn't. And yet eventually the overwhelming pain became too much and Clarke found herself passing out, cursing her weakness with what could be her final breath.

*

It was impossible to tell how long Clarke remained unconscious for, and when she finally came too she was so disorientated she wondered for a few long seconds if she was in some kind of afterlife, as she couldn't remember dreaming and she wasn't sure she should have survived that much pain.

In fact, she didn't feel great when she woke up. Just better than she had before she passed out. Then she remembered, Raven. Her almost certainly dead friend, whose body she was lying on top of, quickly getting up and studying her friend for a tiny sign of life. When the signs were inconclusive she just started smacking her face and desperately screaming her friend's name.

"Raven! Raven! RAVEN!" Clarke screamed desperately over and over again.

As she got no response, and her friend didn't even appeared to be breathing, but Clarke refused to be denied, especially if that meant she was left alone to die. So she continued hiting Raven and screaming her name, completely forgetting her medical training in the face of her pain and sorrow.

Then just as she started doing something useful, namely CPR, Raven suddenly started coughing, barely turning her head before violently vomiting up what looked like blood. But Clarke didn't care, Raven was alive! And maybe still dying, but she was somehow alive, meaning there was hope. So she screamed her friend's name one more time, this time happily, and then frantically embraced her, the two girls then breaking down and crying with relief and exhaustion.

*

Hours later...

Raven wasn't sure how she was alive. It should be scientifically impossible, but then again Night Blood was still very much a mystery to her. One hopefully that she would study some day. But right now, she was just so grateful to be alive. And not just for the obvious reasons, but because it gave her a chance to do something she should have done a long time ago.

Something she almost did when she thought she was dying, and something she'd almost done many times before. Every other time she had back down at the last minute, but not this time. Not now that she'd had a chance to freshen up, and the Night Blood had mostly fixed their appearances. And fix something else, which was even more unexpected.

"Clarke..." Raven began, waiting until she had her friends attention before walking forward slightly.

"Oh, hey Raven." Clarke greeted, "I've been checking out supplies, and we should have enough to wait out the initial storm if we... hey, your leg's fixed!"

"Yeah." Raven grinned shyly, "I guess you've got Wolverine blood."

"We both do now." Clarke grinned happily, before closing the short distance between them and hugging her friend, "That's really great. I'm so happy for you."

"Me too." Raven said softly, hugging her friend tight.

For a few long seconds Clarke just enjoyed that hug, and then pulled back slightly and began rambling, "Wow. I mean, wow! I was going to say we need to seriously ration ourselves, but we should totally pig out in celebration. Because, I mean..."

"Can I kiss you." Raven said abruptly.

"What?" Clarke said softly in surprise.

"Can I kiss you." Raven repeated, before quickly adding, "I wanted to when we first woke up, but my mouth tasted like puke."

"Okay, yeah... thanks for not doing that." Clarke said in disbelief, before cautiously asking, "Raven, you... you don't think you owe me something, do you? Because you don't. And you don't have too."

"I want too." Raven said quickly, before clarifying, "I mean, I am grateful that you're always saving us. Saving me. And maybe that's a small part of it, but mostly I, I just want you. I've wanted you since the beginning. I didn't want to admit that even to myself back then, because I hated you for it. Both for Finn cheating on me, and him dying. Which weren't your fault, but it was just easier to hate you, and I'm so sorry for that. I wish I'd been nicer to you back then, been able to see your side of it, but I was just blinded by grief. And then you just kept saving me, us, even from ourselves, no matter the cost to yourself, and... and no matter what, you tried to do the right thing. Make life about more than just surviving. And I couldn't help but love that about you. Plus you're smoking hot, so that helps."

The two girls briefly exchanged a smile, and then Clarke cautiously began, "Raven... I... I don't know about this. I-"

"I'm not proposing to you Clarke." Raven quipped dryly, "I just really want to kiss you, and maybe fool around a little. Where it goes from there is up to you. I just want you to know that it isn't just about showing gratitude. I just truly want to kiss you. And see you naked. And, well... it's not like we have anything better to do for the next few days, so why not?"

There was a long silence in which Clarke bit her lip and stared at Raven, thinking about all the reasons they shouldn't do this. Luckily Raven had thought of all of them to herself, and while some of them had kept her quiet for a long time Raven was also more than prepared to argue against them now she had finally gone for it.

Especially now that she finally had the nerve to see it Raven realised just how badly she actually wanted to kiss her. To kiss all over that beautiful body of hers. To see that beautiful body naked. And most of all, just to fuck the beautiful girl. God, she wanted to do that so bad. Thankfully she was finally about to get her wish.

"Okay." Clarke said softly and hesitantly.

"Okay what?" Raven gently pushed.

"You can kiss me." Clarke smiled, already leaning in.

Not needing any more encouragement Raven grinned happily and then leaned in, their lips meeting in a soft, tender kiss. Maybe a bit too soft considering the overwhelming gratitude Raven was feeling towards Clarke, and the equally overwhelming need to celebrate the fact they were alive.

But on the other hand this was something Raven had wanted for a very long time, and she wanted to savour it, and perhaps more importantly not to overwhelm Clarke or make her second guess what they were doing. So that soft, tender kiss continued for the next few, long minutes, until finally Raven just couldn't take it any more and she started kicking things up a notch.

Fortunately Clarke was on the same page as she greeted Raven's tongue with her own, those tongues then practically doing battle as the two girls made out like horny teenagers. Along the way Raven gently started pushing Clarke backwards, and then down onto a nearby chair so she could straddle her waist. All of which she did while still maintaining the kiss.

Then only then did she allow her hands to start wandering over female flesh for the first time in her life, Raven finding herself surprisingly calm about the whole thing. Maybe it was the fact that Clarke's lips were so soft and welcoming, or that her friend was just a great kisser, but she felt nothing but overwhelming confidence. And maybe something greater than that.

Clarke was certainly surprised by that. Surprised, and yet delighted. It wasn't like she had expected Raven to be shy exactly, but this was bold, even for her. Maybe it was a sign that Raven had been with a girl before, the thought making Clarke feel surprisingly jealous.

It was rather unlikely, because Clarke felt strongly that she would have heard something about it, but she couldn't help imagining Raven with some other girl learning the joy of lesbian sex. Maybe even Octavia. Which Clarke would almost certainly have heard about, but she couldn't help imagining now, partly out of jealousy and partly because it was just such a wickedly hot picture.

She would be lying if she claimed she hadn't thought about it before, or better yet herself sandwiched between them, and Clarke had definitely thought about what it might be like to be with one of them.

Especially Raven, who she'd been weirdly connected to ever since they first met, and while she regretted everything that happened with Finn she was so glad they had managed to find friendship through it all, and now perhaps something more. But Clarke didn't want to think about the past, or the future right now. She too just wanted to celebrate the fact they were alive, and also show her gratitude to Raven, who had saved Clarke just as much as Clarke had saved her.

At this point of the gentle celebration and gratitude had long since passed and they were literally tearing at each other's clothes, Clarke being the only one with the presence of mind to try and take them off first before doing any damage. Then when they were both naked Raven suddenly broke the kiss, bent her head down and lashed her mouth to one of Clarke's nipples.

Clarke let out a loud pleasure filled cry at this, and gently cupped Raven's head to show her approval. She then continued showing her approval as Raven went back and forth between her tits, cupping each of them into her mouth while playing with the other with her free hand while Raven frantically licked, sucked and even gently bit her nipples.

This seemed to last an eternity, almost the entire time Clarke feeling guilty over not at least insisting on swapping over so she could return the favour. Then Raven started moving her mouth lower, and Clarke felt guilty for not being the one to do this first, especially as there was a good chance this was the first time Raven was doing anything with a girl.

Clarke should have asked. She should ask now, but she was just so busy moaning, gasping and whimpering in pure pleasure Clarke just couldn't seem to find the words. Then Raven was kneeling in between her legs, looking up at Clarke with nervousness in her eyes which seemed to confirm this was her first time doing this, and Clarke should really be the one to show her how to do it. Although for better or worse, Raven didn't give her the chance.

Raven was normally good at hiding her nervousness when faced with something she hadn't done before, but she thought it was pretty understandable she was doing a lousy job of it now, considering this wasn't just her first time with a girl, but it was her first time with Clarke. Both those things were big, but especially the latter, because well, this was Clarke!

Clarke Griffin, Wanheda, the unofficial leader of their people, the girl who had saved them countless times, who had saved Raven countless times, and pretty much the most bad ass chick Raven had ever known. Most of all, the only girl Raven had ever had real feelings for, and the second person overall.

Being bisexual was easy when anything with the same sex was merely a passing thought, or even an increasingly frequent fantasy, but it was another thing when finding yourself pressed up against somebody who's body was similar to your own and frantically kissing them, before moving lower.

For Raven it was a wonderful thing, and she especially liked giving Clarke's big boobs the attention they so richly deserved. The attention that Raven had been aching to give them. She just hoped that she would feel the same about eating pussy, because Raven promised herself when she started she wasn't going to stop until she made Clarke cum in her mouth and all over her face.

Thankfully as it turns out there was no need to be nervous, as the second her tongue touched Clarke's cunt Raven's taste-buds were set on fire with a flavour that she instantly loved. She even moaned almost as loud as Clarke as she slowly slid her tongue from the bottom of the other girl's pussy all the way up to the top.

Raven then repeated this process, at first trying to keep her licks slow and gentle, but she quickly lost control and started rapidly increasing the pace. Partly because she loved hearing Clarke crying out in pure pleasure because of her, but mostly because Raven obviously wanted more of that yummy girl cream.

She got plenty of it, because while Clarke's pussy had been encouragingly wet by the time Raven got to it just her gentle tongue work was enough to make her juices really start to flow. Soon Raven had no choice but to wrap her mouth around as much of that yummy treat in front of her just so that Clarke wouldn't ruin the chair beneath her.

Or at least that was the excuse Raven told herself. Although it was hard to debate it when Clarke's pussy cream started literally sliding straight into her mouth and down her throat, making Raven literally whimper with joy. Besides, it wasn't like Clarke was complaining. In fact Clarke was doing the exact opposite, as she was moaning, gasping and whimpering in pure pleasure.

Clarke continued to be surprised about just how bold Raven was being. Honestly it was wonderfully intoxicating, and Clarke more than welcome that, even if she didn't entirely welcome the way in which Raven was choosing to use that boldness right now. Because sure, what the other girl was doing to felt amazing, but it was all too much, too soon.

Especially considering this was their first time together. Clarke very much hoped that it would be the first of many, and if that was the case no doubt there would be times when they would be in a hurry, but right now they were literally trapped indoors, and would be for weeks, which would hopefully be filled with hot lesbian sex.

It was hard not to become distracted by the idea, especially as with every stroke of Raven's tongue she was hitting Clarke's clit. But Clarke had to focus. She had to focus on stopping this. Finding the words to tell Raven to slow down before she came too soon.

For better or for worse, that wasn't easy, as every time Clarke opened her mouth to complain Raven did something else which was wonderful, rendering the mighty 'Wanheda' completely speechless. In the end Clarke was only able to focus enough by remembering the first girl who had done this to her. The girl who she had been hopelessly in love with, regardless of what had happened between them. Lexa...

"Raven, stop." Clarke finally croaked, immediately feeling guilty about the way that Raven pulled back slightly with a heart-broken expression on her face. Then before Raven could say anything Clarke quickly interjected, "Oh baby, that was so good. Mmmmm, too good. You are going to make me cum, but I'm not ready for that. Not yet. Ohhhhhh Raven, I want to do this all night, but if you aren't careful you'll nock me unconscious."

"That's the idea." Raven grinned cockily, leaning forward again.

"Yeah, I get that. But, we don't have anywhere else to be, so slow down." Clarke moaned softly, before crying out as Raven started to lick her pussy again, this time wonderfully slowly, "Ooooooh yesssssss, that's it Raven! Lick me just like that. Just like that, ohhhhhhh Goooooddddd! Mmmmm yeahhhhhh, nice and slow, lick my pussy nice and slow! No! Oh shit, avoid my clit, yes, that's it, oh fuck yeah! Oh fuck!"

Even as Raven obliged and not only started gently licking her pussy but avoiding her clit entirely Clarke felt overwhelmed with pleasure simply because this was Raven going down on her. Especially as it could be the first of many times.

Or at least, Clarke certainly hoped it would be, and she would be more than happy to return the favour to make that happen, especially as having Raven in between her legs was proving to be even better than she thought it would be, Raven proving to be just as eager and knowing about eating pussy as she was so many other things.

It was honestly hard to continue giving her instructions for one reason, although Clarke managed it for the same reason she had been able to tell Raven to slow down, that being her former lover.

Using Lexa's memory as a way Clarke could have more satisfying sex with another woman made her feel incredibly guilty, but Clarke truly believe that Lexa would do the same if the roles were reversed. The Grounders had always lived by a code of the ends justify the means, and Lexa had been guilty of that to a fault.

Only Clarke had been able to reason with her, and in the end it had been the ultimate reason behind Lexa's death, which would always make Clarke feel incredibly guilty. That guilt and heart-break were enough to dump icewater on the blaze which was Clarke's lust, and while normally it was enough to snuff it out completely now that fire was just too large, and was threatening to become like the Praimfaya itself as it completely consumed Clarke.

For now Lexa's memory was enough to keep it at bay, as much as Clarke hated herself for it. Although she was having sex with a girl, so it would have been impossible not to think of Lexa. Lexa was her first love, and no matter how much time passed Clarke would probably always think of her.

Especially while picturing herself in some kind of relationship with another girl, which yes, was purely physical for now, although if she was being honest Clarke wouldn't mind it becoming more. Which made her feel kind of scared as well as guilty, but mostly she just felt incredible pleasure as Raven continued licking her pussy, Clarke eventually becoming lost in it, and admittedly pleasant memories of Lexa.

Inevitably blissful pleasure gave way to a burning need for more, forcing Clarke to think of increasingly unpleasant memories just to prevent herself from cumming. Or more accurately give Raven the permission she was clearly waiting for to make her cum.

Not that Raven made this easy on her as after a long time of just gently licking her pussy the brunette ever so slightly increased the pace of her licks and her attention to Clarke's clit. It was the latter which was Clarke's downfall, Raven first just brushing against that sensitive bundle of nerves with every other lick, then with almost every lick, then with every lick before finally lingering on Clarke's clit with several licks directly to it.

Eventually Raven even took Clarke's clit into her mouth and sucked on it, at which point the blonde lost control completely, "Oooooooohhhhhhhhhh yessssssssss, ah fuck Raven! Raven! Oh Raven! Make me cum, please make me cum, ohhhhhhhh fuckkkkkkkkk! Yesssssssss, fuck me, fuck me with your tongue, aaaaaaahhhhhh fuck! Tongue fuck me, oooooooh shit, please Raven, stick your tongue inside my cunt and fuck me with it! Fuck me and make me cum, fuck me and make me cum, fuck me and make me cum, ooooooohhhhhh fuckkkkkkkkk yessssssssss, aaaaaaaahhhhhhhh Gooooooodddddddd Raven! Aaaaaaahhhhhhhhh fuckkkkkkkkkkk!"