My First "Girlfriend"

The night before our trip to the aquarium she called me at work she called out sick. I could hear her voice was different. She asked me to come see her after work. She said it wasn't urgent, but I drove as fast as I could to her house as soon as I was off work. When I got there, she was in tears. I hugged her and asked what was wrong, but she just kept telling me she would tell me later. I spent that night holding her and comforting her the best I could. The next morning she asked me if I could let her borrow two thousand dollars. I was curious but did not ask. I had saved up money so I got the money and gave it to her. She said, " I'll pay you back baby I promise." Those would be the last words I would ever hear her say.

I went to work that day like normal, she sent me a text telling me she was going to go see Sunny and Chrissy for a girls night out. I told her I would stay at my house and to have fun. The next day I tried to call her but it went straight to voicemail, sent a text, but the only reply I got was "I'm ok, I need time". I drove to her apartment, but no one answered the door, and her car was not around. I called the club and talked to both Sunny and Chrissy. Sunny said she had not seen her since she quit, and Chrissy said it had been a week since they talked, and that everything had seemed fine. My heart broke, I spent the next couple of months crying and feeling miserable. I tried her cell every day, but it always went straight to her voicemail. She was fired from work because she stopped showing up.

Chrissy gave me her phone number and we became friends, she comforted me the best she could. She would invite me to the club, but I would always decline. Eventually, she just stopped asking. Around Thanksgiving, I got a letter with no return address, just my address for both. The markings indicated it had been mailed from Miami, Florida. Inside was a letter and five-hundred dollars in cash.

"Hi Baby,

I just wanted you to know I'm ok. My ex proposed to me and well I had made a life with him before. I felt we needed a second chance. I loved you very much and it was not easy to let you go. I am sorry if I hurt you, be sure you deserve the best and that's not me. There many girls that would be lucky to be with you.

Love always,

Amanda"

I was glad she was ok, but that letter destroyed me even more. Made the heartache worse, but I just kept going even on the days when I was ready to give up. I stopped trying to call her and just worked and went home and vice versa. Most nights, I would cry myself to sleep. To this day, I don't know why that hit me so hard. As I was wrapping Christmas presents, I came across the letter. I had tossed them inside a drawer and found it while looking for tape. I read the letter, but this time it made me angry.

I decided to go and blow some money at the strip club. As I walked in, Sunny greeted me and went through the regular spiel. Chrissy was there, but seemed to avoid me. This time I asked for some shots and a beer. I had this rage and was feeling manly, but after a couple of shots my world started to shift from side to side. I had tipped one-hundred dollars to the girls on stage, and my bladder was full. I went to the bathroom to empty my bladder. As I came out, one of the girls asked if I wanted a private dance. I said, "Sure, why not?."

As we walked down the aisle we passed the DJ, and the door to the room where I had lost my virginity opened. Out came Amanda, and our eyes locked. My legs felt like jelly while my heart started beating so fast. Words could not escape me, but tears started flowing heavily. My eyes shifted to the guy who had a spot on his pants. Then between Amanda's legs. Her tights glistening from what I assumed had been the residue from their fucking. At that moment, Chrissy came running, grabbed me and took me outside.

I don't remember much of what happened later. I just remember crying, Chrissy taking my keys and my wallet driving me to a house. She helped me out and took me inside. She kept saying "I'm so sorry" over and over again. I woke up the next day in a strange room, in a messy bed with Chrissy on top of me. She was awake but holding on to me watching morning cartoons. I asked her when Amanda had gotten back to the strip club. " Today was her first day back. I did not expect you to come, otherwise, I would have said something," she said as she knelt next to me on the bed. "I guess I should come clean....i wrote you the letter she never did. I just wanted to help you out of that funk you were in. Her and her man do that all the time break up then get back together. She's your typical gold digger trying to get easy money." she said.

She was right while we dated I paid her rent and car insurance. Took her shopping and other things of course I never let her pay for anything. Around the time we were supposed to be moving in together she started talking to her ex and got back together or so I found out. Chrissy and I stayed friends for years and still are to this day. I never went back to the strip club and never ran into Amanda again.