New Year, Old Crush

All the teasing was driving me crazy and I wanted him so badly. I sucked his fingers clean, carefully sliding my tongue between them and smirked around the digits when his eyes darkened. Hovering over me, he teased the tip of his cock up and down my folds before slamming into me, the shock of it making me gasp and arch my back. I moaned before quickly coming back to my senses. "Condom!" I cried, trying to squirm away from his shaft.

"Shit! Sorry Jules, I got carried away," He said before sliding out of me and grabbing one from his desk and starting to open it. "Should I be worried about STDs?" he half jokes and I shake my head no, blushing. "Well, you don't need to worry either, baby," he cooed before climbing back on top of me and thrusting into my waiting pussy again, about halfway. "I always check if I'm clean before I get dirty."

I laugh, surprised at how much his dirty talk was affecting my body; I'm already close to cumming and he hasn't even bottomed out. I couldn't help but clench around him, feeling his cock pulse in return as he refuses to move, sucking on my neck until I can't wait any longer. I groan and push on his shoulder to roll him onto his back before he can stop me. Climbing on top of him, I grab his cock and position it at the entrance of my hot pussy. I lowered my hips down until the head pops in, his thick cock filling me up as I slid further and further down. "Oh Jules, you're so fucking tight," he cries as I get him deeper and deeper inside me. I moan as I bottom out on his cock and start pumping up and down on his dick.

"Fuck, you're cock is hu..." I start to say, my speech cut off when he bends his knees, lifting my ass higher slightly changing the angle, now hitting my G-spot.

"Is that your little spot, baby?" Lewis said through clenched teeth. I lean forward and put my hands on his chest, a little overwhelmed from the new angle. He grabs my hips and starts thrusting fast and hard, hitting my spot over and over, the ribs of the condom hugging my inner walls.

"Fuck, fuck, oh fuck that feels so good," I start getting vocal as I get close to cumming. He reaches one thumb to my front and starts furiously rubbing my clit. "Shit! Fuck! Lewis, I'm fucking cumming!" I cry as my orgasm rocks through my body.

"Fuck!" Lewis cries and I feel his cock start pulsing, spurting his cum. My blood was still pounding as he slowly rocked his hips into mine, his cock barely entering and leaving me as we calmed down. Out of nowhere, he pushes me off of him and rolls over to the other side of the bed. "Thanks for that, babe," he says as he shifts to look at me, pausing before kissing me. He gets up, slides the condom off and into the trash before jumping back into bed. He turns away from me, and it wasn't long before he fell asleep.

I lay back in bed, thinking about what had just happened. My mind was clearing after I came, and my mind was now focused on looking back on the night. I wondered how casual this had been for him. He was so... professional after he came, like it didn't mean anything but sex. Maybe it didn't. To me, I thought it had, but it seemed to be a one-way street. I tried to relax so I could sleep, but my worry about my long-time feelings from this man resulted in me tossing and turning all night. I realized that he may have gotten all he wanted from me in this one night.

I woke to Lewis shaking my shoulder. "Jules, I have plans this morning, you can let yourself out. I'll see you when we skate on Sunday," he said before shooting me a smile and turning away, fully dressed, and heading out of the door of the bedroom. I frowned at his retreating back, hurt and frustrated. Lewis knows nothing about me anymore and clearly doesn't want to. Really, I know nothing about him, and I still have a grudge that I hold against him for betraying me in high school. Even thinking about all of this made me feel immature and stupid. I just need to accept that it was a one-night thing and get over it. I quickly dressed and had my first "walk of shame" back to my parent's house.

Sunday came quickly, and I hadn't heard from Lewis since we had sex. I realized that he had never even asked for my phone number. I told myself I wouldn't be seeing much of him after today anyway and tried to get over the ordeal. Instead, I focused on getting all my gear out for ice skating on Vincent and Sam's backyard pond. They live a bit further out from the city, with the scenery and house clear in my mind as I remembered how gorgeous it was with several acres of land. My reminiscing was interrupted as I heard a loud, drawn out knock on the door accompanied with some laughing. I go to the door and when I open it, I see Lewis on the ground just outside the door, his skates in one hand and a paper bag drink in the other. "Baby!" he cries sloppily, hiccupping as he does. "Ready to go skating?!?"

I shushed him; it was a Sunday morning and our neighbors were likely sleeping. "What the fuck, Lewis?" I whisper yell at him, grabbing his hand and helping him up. He stood close to me, and a strong scent of alcohol washed over me. "You're trashed, aren't you?"

Lewis leaned his face towards mine and I was suddenly trying to hold up his entire weight, which wasn't easy for a woman my size with a man his size. "Ssssshhh..." he says in my face, spitting slightly. I roll my eyes and wrap one of his arms over my shoulder and walk him in the apartment and sit him in a chair in the foyer. He grabs my wrist and pulls me down onto my knees in front of him, and then brings both of his hands up to my face and caresses it. "You are so..." he starts to say, but I cut him off.

"What are you doing here?" I ask angrily, pulling his hands away from my face. He brings one hand up and gently pushes my hair from my eyes.

"You were always my favorite in school, Jules. And the most pretty. And so dependable. I knew you would help me." He carelessly replied, twirling my hair in his fingers.

"That's great, good old dependable Jules, always taking care of everyone, no matter how they treat her or how difficult it is for her!" I cried in anger.

"I'm sorry..." he says quietly, and out of nowhere puts his face in his hands and starts sobbing. My heart broke; even after everything he had done, I still see him as the incredible boy I once knew, and I didn't want to see him break down like this. I brought one hand up to his hair and ran my fingers through it.

"What's going on, Lewis?" I ask with genuine concern in my voice. "You don't have to come skating today."

When I said that, his head shot up from his hands and his face looked wildly concerned. "No, no, no! I said I would go. I don't bail on things, Jules. I can't let this make me bail!" He looked so worried and I was confused, but on some level, I understood what he meant.

"What is it?" I asked again with little hope of getting a real answer.

He looked deeply in my eyes and a few more tears dropped from his. "I miss him," he said, and I know better than to push him further. I reach forward to hug him and he drags me close, totally enveloping me in a strong, tight bear hug. I feel a few tears fall on my forehead and then feel his lips follow them, kissing them away. After what feels like a long time, I pull away and smile at him.

"I don't think you're going to be able to stand on your skates," I say, trying to convince him to go home and go to bed. "No one will blame you for going home."

He takes my hands and shakes his head rapidly. "No. Please. I really, really want to go. Can you help me?" His begging was so sad, and I knew I couldn't say no to him.

After a substantial effort on my part, I had Lewis wrapped in some of my father's winter wear and in the front seat of my car. He slept most of the drive to my brother's, and we arrived only a few minutes late. When I woke him up, he was still intoxicated, but definitely in a more fun mood, rather than so emotional. When we approached the others, he almost seemed like he was just very happy this morning, rather than shitfaced.

However, when we got on the ice, it was a different story all together. He immediately fell flat on his back. "Oh my God! Are you okay?" I asked, kneeling next to him. He started laughing and held out his hand for help up. I tried to lift him, but he pulled me down with him, and in seconds I was lying on my back next to Lewis on the ice, both of us laughing. "Lewis!" I cried, punching him playfully. We both rolled on our sides, and there was a pregnant pause while Lewis smiled at me. I felt butterflies in my stomach, but I shook the moment off and pushed myself to a sitting position and helped Lewis do the same. This time I was more careful, and I got him onto his feet. He put his arm around my shoulder and I managed a fair bit of his weight as we skated. As time passed, he became slightly more coordinated, only needing to hold my hand. It was almost romantic, but the fantasy was ruined by my knowing that he was only drunk right now; if he was sober, all he'd want from me is sex.

After a few hours of skating, everyone was tired, so we came in to get some lunch. Lewis went to talk to Sam and Alex, and I headed to the bathroom. Vincent intercepted me on my way. "What is going on with you and Lewis?" he asked, always wanting to be in with the gossip.

"Honestly, we had a night together on Friday, but it meant nothing," I told him, then I explained Friday night and my disappointment, and then what I found on the doorstep this morning.

After hearing the story, Vincent ran his fingers through his hair. "Shit, Julia," he said. "Do you not know what he is upset about?" I shook my head, desperately wanting Vincent to explain. "His dad died in a drunk driving accident less than a month ago. It naturally hit him really hard."

"Shit..." I said, almost ashamed for being so out of the loop. "I had no idea."

"I think it's been really hard on him. He's been trying to take care of his mom and be strong, but I don't think he has anyone to talk to. You should have seen him at the funeral. He didn't cry, just stood there, almost dazed, like he wasn't even there. It was horrible."

I took in the news, trying to reconfigure how I felt about Lewis and his behavior. "I can't imagine going through all of that," I said to Vince.

"I know he wasn't your favorite in school, sis, but his family have always been close with ours, and they are going through a hard time. Just try to give him a break." Vincent said before heading back in to meet with the rest of the group.

After lunch, Lewis fell asleep on the couch, worn out from playing with my two nieces. Vince told me to head home, insisting that he'd take care of him.

The next day, Christmas Eve, I woke to a lot of hustling and noise coming from my parents' kitchen. I quickly took a shower before making my way to the kitchen to help. Eying the sheer volume of food piled up on the bench, I questioned mom about who was coming. My mom rattled off a large list of family and church friends, but I stopped listening after I heard one in particular. "Did you say the Swans were coming?" I asked, surprised to hear that Lewis and his family would be here.

"Yeah, after what happened to Lisa's husband, we didn't want them to have to feel his absence over Christmas," my mother replied.

"That makes sense. I'm sure they'll appreciate it," I replied, already wondering what tonight would bring.

Nearing lunchtime, everyone started arriving and, true to form, the Swans were the last to come in. Lewis walked in and locked eyes with me, staring at me with an intensity I had grown accustomed to in the past week. He walked straight towards me until he was standing in front of me, a little too close. He handed me the pie in his hands and leaned down towards me. "Merry Christmas," he said, and moved a small tendril of hair away from my face.

I cleared my throat, overwhelmed by his scent, upset that he still had this effect on me. "Merry Christmas," I stuttered.

He smiled down at me. "I'm sorry about showing up here like that, very embarrassing of me," he said, never taking his eyes off mine and, I noticed, not looking embarrassed in the slightest.

"It's not a problem." I said, trying not to faint from his sheer effect on me. "I did what anyone would have done in the situation."

"Well," he started, eyes trailing down my body slowly, "I'd rather always have that someone be you." With that, he was gone as quickly as he appeared, and my heart was beating through my chest.

We met several more times throughout the night, with the sexual tension between us growing stronger each time. I was sorely tempted to drag him into an empty room and let him have his way with me, but I already knew that I would end up getting hurt. He needed a friend now more than ever, and I refused to be anything else for him, even though the slightest touches felt like electricity and I couldn't stop thinking about our night together.

I was sitting in the corner by the fire after dinner sipping on some eggnog. I loved watching the snow fall from the window, something I hadn't been able to experience in several years. Suddenly, I felt another warm leg pressing against mine. I turned to see Lewis sitting beside me, his face tired looking. After a long silence, I spoke up. "Your pie was good," I said awkwardly, not sure how to talk to such a perfect specimen in a normal manner.

His curls fell over his eyes as he laughed. "Thank you, but my mother is the one you should compliment."

Of course, I'm such an idiot, I thought, kicking myself inwardly. "Oh, yeah... right," I said ungracefully, shaking my head at myself. Silence surrounded us, and he brought his hand up to pull hair away from my face. His touch was electric, and I felt it in my toes. He started to lean in, but I panicked. Not knowing how best to respond, I said, "I'm sorry about your father."

His expression quickly hardened, and he pulled away from me, his demeanor suddenly cold. "I didn't realize that my family's tragedy was anyone else's gossip. Maybe next time you can mind your own business and fuck off," he said forcefully before getting up and leaving the apartment, slamming the door behind him. He's angry with me? Is he serious? I thought, beginning to get pissed off myself. What the actual fuck? He's the prick, and yet somehow, he thinks it's okay to be pissed that I know about his dad? It wasn't gossip, he's at my family's Christmas Eve dinner for Christ's sake, it was just information. I headed into the kitchen to refill my glass after I downed my eggnog in frustration. That was it. I was so sick of dealing with Lewis Swan's bullshit. I was done with him, whether he liked it or not.

The next few days were full of family and festivities, but they did little to subside my anger about what had gone down with Lewis. I decided that he had been totally in the wrong, and from his lack of contact with me I assumed he felt the same way. However, New Year's Eve was approaching, and I knew he would be at my old friend Stacey's party. I was sure he would avoid me, but I still tried to convince Alex to let me stay home.

"No, babe, you are coming and that is final. You aren't going to let him ruin your night! He probably won't even come if he is that pissed at you," she insisted.

"Fine, but I refuse to enjoy it!" I replied, eyeing a couple of dresses in a nearby window. We entered the shop, and I picked out a few dresses with Alex before going to try them on. "How's this one look?" I asked as I stepped out of the dressing room. It was a gold dress with long, tight sleeves that led up to a wide V, which showed off my cleavage and my clavicle. It hugged my legs, making my butt look fantastic.

"Sexy!" Alex said, marveling at me. "How's mine?". She spun for me, gorgeous in a navy dress, but I knew she could do better. So, we continued shopping for a couple hours more before we settled on a perfect dress for her. The both of us happy with our purchases, we started to make our way to the exit of the shopping center when I felt my phone buzz in my pocket.

"Hello?" I answered, curious of who was calling.

"Miss Evans?" A woman's voice replied.

"Yes, who is this?" I responded.

"This is Mrs. Baxter from the homeowner's association for 1024 West 8^th apartments. I'm calling to inform you that your application for apartment 202 has been processed and you are free to move in in the new year, pending payment of first and last month's rent as well as a security deposit," she said.

I was ecstatic and jumped up and down in the store. "Wow, thank you, thank you!" I cried in to the phone. "I'm just surprised, I thought there were many other applicants?" I questioned.

"There were," Mrs. Baxter began, "However, you had an incredible character reference from another tenant in the building, a Mr. Swan. We often trust our other tenants in these matters." I felt like I had been shot; I was stunned. Not only had Lewis listened when I told him I had put in an application, but he went to the trouble to vouch for me. What an incredibly decent thing to do, I thought. "Miss Evans?" I heard Mrs. Baxter say into the phone.

"Oh, yes, sorry! Thanks again. May I call you back on the 1st for more details?" I asked, still trying to process this new information.

"Absolutely, Happy New year," she said, and I heard the line go dead.

I immediately turned and told Alex the news, her excitement only increasing mine. I knew I was going to have to thank Lewis tomorrow, regardless of if I wanted to or not. I owed him that much.

When we arrived at the party the next evening, I felt confident and knew that I was not only capable of facing Lewis, but that I would also look stunning while I do so. Despite this, I decided I had better take a couple of shots of liquid courage before he came in, late as usual. I spent the next hour or so anxiously watching the door, waiting to see him. When he didn't show after another 30 minutes, I decided that it was a lost cause. I found Alex and told her that I didn't feel very well and that I was heading home early. She shot me a look of concern, but I waved it away and kissed her on the cheek before saying my goodbyes to our host and some other friends. I grabbed my coat and stepped out the door, turning to close it behind me. When I turned back to leave, I was face to face with Lewis.

"Uhhh..." I said, momentarily stunned by his incredible smell and the sight of his wide shoulders in front of me. "Hi," I mumbled.

"Hello," he said back in a deep voice. "Leaving?" He asked. I nodded, swallowing at his severe tone.

"I wanted to talk to you," I managed to say.

"Then talk." He replied coldly.

"I just wanted to..." I started, looking down at my feet, my confidence dwindling.

"Spit it out, Julia," he said. I don't know if it was his harsh words or the fact that it was the first time I can remember him calling me anything other than Jules, but I lost it on him.

"You know what? Fuck you, Lewis. I wanted to apologize to you for god only knows what, trying to fucking be there for you, and thank you for being considerate enough to recommend me for that apartment, but I'm done with you. This is bullshit. You ignored me all through high school for no reason and broke my heart, and then I see you again some ten years later, you make me feel special, sleep with me and leave without more than a few words! I am so over this bullshit. You're just an asshole. Don't speak to me again!" I yelled at him, furious and trying not to let tears run down my face.

I push against him to try to move past him and leave him behind in the doorway, but I feel his hands press against me, one on my hip, one on my shoulder, holding me back. "Stop," he said quietly, looking down at me. "I'm sorry. You're 100% right. I'm an asshole," he sighed.