Oceans

"Legs smiled at him and told him it would do. Then Legs asked him how much he wanted for it. The crowd started looking at Denny's other pieces. Denny thought he was going to start selling his pieces."

"Two thousand dollars," he told Legs. "Legs reached into his wallet and started counting out cash."

"Denny was almost giddy. "I own this now, right?" asked Legs. Denny nodded."

"Yep, you bought yourself an original Denny Wainwright painting," he said. "Where are you going to put it? It would probably look good in..." That was all he had a chance to say before Legs lifted the large painting and slammed it on top of Denny's head. Denny hit the ground like a sack of potatoes. Legs then spit on him and told him that the next time he said anything about his wife he wouldn't be so nice. He started telling everyone there that Denny had no talent and his paintings were all worthless. Everyone who'd been looking at a painting stepped away from it."

"Denny called out to Legs as he walked away and said that as an artist Legs was too old fashioned and that he was the newer, more modern artist. He had fused technology and art and Legs was only jealous."

"I guess I'd been so pissed about Chloe that I never tried to find out anything else. Chloe was the first client I'd ever lost. I found out that I no longer represented her the day of the Commerce show. For three solid weeks, beginning when he went on his promotional tour, I hadn't seen or heard from my husband. I thought he'd been simply concentrating on all of the last minute changes to the statue. I knew that he was angry at me and I'd practiced several different ways for us to get over our problems. The thought that my marriage was over had never occurred to me."

"I'd been working very hard over those weeks because I'd decided to try to sell my agency. It had come between Legs and I and I couldn't allow that to continue. If I went back to handling all of his interests myself there'd be no need for him to have Dana anymore. I was also sure that nothing had happened with Chloe yet."

"Over those few weeks I hadn't noticed it but there had been changes around our house. Maybe he done it before he went on the tour but I hadn't noticed it. Maybe I'd been so preoccupied with myself that I hadn't noticed what was right in front of me."

"The morning of the show, I woke up because I heard noises outside. I looked out my window and saw two flatbed tow trucks, the longer kind that can carry a couple of cars. Legs had five Mustangs at that time. It looked like he was moving all of his cars out of our garage. That was not a good sign. My heart was beating so loudly that I thought I'd die. I ran out of the house and saw one truck pulling away. I was dressed only in a robe that I thrown on with nothing underneath it."

"I barely caught up to the driver of the second truck as he tied down Legs car. I asked him where he was taking the cars. He showed me a work order with Legs' signature on it. He had a photocopy of the titles to all of the cars and the owner's written permission to move them. There was nothing I could do about it. He also wouldn't tell me where the cars were going. He was very polite and very professional. I grabbed him by his arm and let my robe open a bit."

"He immediately noticed. I begged him to tell me where he was taking the cars. I told him that my husband and I might be heading for a divorce if I didn't get a chance to talk to him. He looked down at my breasts. I let the robe open a bit more. "They're being moved to that big transport and storage facility downtown," he said. I asked him what the name of it was. There were several places downtown that stored cars. He just smirked and looked down again. I opened the robe all the way up."

"He gasped when he looked at me. He could see everything from my face to my feet. He spent a lot of time looking hungrily at my pussy before he answered. "Dawson International," he said."

"I asked him if there was any way that he could not take the cars. From the look in his eyes I was sure that there was. I shook my head and started walking back toward my house. There was no way I'd ever do that. Okay, I'd already done it, but this was different. I'm sure that it was similar to sins I'd already committed but I was never going to do that again."

"When I got into the house, I called Dawson International and was told that they couldn't give me any information on any of their clients or their clients' vehicles without permission from the client."

"I started looking around the house. Most, but not all, of Legs' swords were gone. There were none of his paintings left except for the one that hung over our bed, the painting of me that he'd done before we got married. It was still our favorite piece. The fact that it was still there meant that there was still some hope."

"I felt like I was going to die. I needed to talk to him so badly."

Kerri stopped and looked up at us then. I guess she wanted to measure our reactions to what she'd said. Anna was rapt. All of this was new to her and Kerri had been very vague when describing what she'd done. Kerri's dad sat there with his mouth open. For years he'd thought that I'd been the bad guy. He thought that I had run out on her for no reason, or because I'd simply gotten tired of her.

"Bullshit," I said. "You seem to be giving them the Kerri version of what happened."

"It's the truth," said Kerri.

"It's the truth skewed in a way to make what you did seem like it wasn't that bad or that it makes sense," I said.

"You also left a lot of things out," I continued.

"Like what?" she asked.

"You pretty much told the truth until you got to the part about your cheating," I said. "But you left out a lot of things. Maybe you never knew about them or simply didn't understand. So why don't you take a break and let me talk for a while."

"First," I began. "You make it seem like art has always been the big focus of my life. And you make it sound like we had this grand plan to take the art world by storm. None of that is in any way true. In fact, I didn't want to be an artist. And art was never as important to me as you make it sound."

Everyone in the room was shocked. Even Kerri's mouth dropped open.

"Kerri, the only part you got right was that from the first day I ever laid eyes on you, you were the most important thing in the world to me. When we were kids in school, I was never the biggest kid in the class or the smartest. I wasn't the fastest or the toughest or the best looking, I was a nothing. I had nothing to offer you at all. I was totally unremarkable. I reminded me of the lyrics to that old song that says, "Don't ask about the shape I'm in. I can't sing, I ain't pretty and my legs are thin."

"In short, I was a loser. I would have done anything I could to have you notice me. When we went to art class, I put everything I had into making something nice. Not for a grade or because I liked art, but for you Kerri. I know it sounds odd because at that age I didn't even like girls yet, but I knew that I liked you. I liked you so much that I just wanted to bust every time I saw you. When I gave you that stupid picture and you liked it, that was what made me start on the art thing. It was all to get your attention. Men have been doing stupid things since time began in hopes of pleasing some woman."

"Truthfully, I'd have given art up in a second if you hadn't liked it so much. In the early days, I could only draw or paint if I focused on you. During the time that we were away from each other, everything I did was because I knew that someday we'd meet again. I started doing martial arts because I'm not big and I needed to be able to protect you. Somewhere along the way, I got into Samurai culture. I stopped unarmed martial arts and concentrated on swords and fencing."

"There was a saying in Japanese. "Katana wa bushi no tamashii," The sword is the soul of the samurai. It didn't apply to me because Kerri you were my soul. But until I found you again, a sword would be a good substitute."

"The closest equivalent to the Samurai in our culture, were, of course, the cowboys. I guess that cowboy mentality somehow morphed into the Mustang thing. Even during middle school when I discovered that one of my classmates lived across the street from you, I ate a lot of shit to become her friend so she could send you messages. Everything I've ever done was just to get closer to you."

"I started thinking about our future a long time ago. Once again, the only thing I was good at, like it or not, was the art thing. I never wanted to be a doctor or a lawyer or any of that bullshit. I guess if I had my way, I'd have been a cowboy or a Samurai. But in this day and age all that would have gotten me was committed, so I took the cards I'd been dealt and did the best I could."

"After a while, you were so into the art thing that I couldn't stop. It also looked like we'd be able to make a living at it. I really didn't care if we were going to be rich as long as we were together. I figured that I'd keep it up until we made enough money to be happy and then I'd quit. But after a while you started driving the bus and all I could do was to hang on."

"I didn't mind doing it. In fact, I guess maybe I did like having people want to see my work. And being one of the best at something is a real turn on. But the focus was always you. "

"I don't know when I started to feel that something was wrong. I guess it was when I'd find myself at home all the time painting or doing something to get the next piece ready for the next show and you were just never there anymore. You were representing all of those other guys and always spending time with them instead of me. I know it sounds like I was a jealous child and I'll admit it, I was."

"Please remember that both of us were broken toys, you with your missing pieces and me seemingly unable to do anything without your support. I guess in a way we both had some growing up to do. We both needed to face reality."

"To me it just seemed like I was no longer important to you and neither was our marriage. If you never had time for me or us, there was really no need for me to come home. So I started to spend more time at the new studio. I stopped telling you what was going on because you didn't seem to be interested anyway."

"I pretty much became a recluse. I guess I was in kind of a depression. I walked around like one of those Goth kids. I dressed all in black every day. I carried only my black sword and drove my black Shelby GT 500."

"I started to rely more on Dana for everything. She was always there for me. But there's something you also need to realize. Dana, despite what you want to believe is really pretty. She's got that really hot girl next door type of good looks. It's different from your type of beauty, Kerri. But a lot of people would find her more attractive than you are."

"There are so many types of beauty and so many beautiful women. Dana has that girl next door type. Kerri, you always had that elfin punk girl look, like Amanda. Anna is a classic beauty. But none of it matters. In the end, you fall in love with a person not their looks."

"The thing you've always missed though, Kerri, is that Dana and I were never more than just friends. I was never in love with her. We weren't having sex. The only person in my heart was always you. Your ridiculous jealousy against Dana was for nothing."

"We pumped up the security around the new studio because of the value of the statue. You weren't included on the list because you hadn't watched me work even when I was still working from home in the previous months."

"There were also other reasons for the move. The statue was huge and there were certain types of equipment, like cranes and scaffolds that just wouldn't fit in the house."

"To tell you the truth, in some ways I liked it. I'd go to the studio and be alone with my thoughts. Dana hated it. She called the new studio my den of depression. I did have friends drop by a few times and Amanda and Raphe came by often. I think one of their visits really forced me to see what was going on and that it wasn't just my jealousy. They tried to convince me that our relationship was no longer good for me. For my own sanity, I needed to either change things or just get out and start fresh."

"What I told Amanda when she asked me why I put up with you was like the lyrics to my favorite song, "Oceans," by Evanescence."

* * * * * *

Don't want to be the one to walk away

But I can't bear the thought of one more day

I think I finally understand what it means to be lost

Can't find the road to lead us out of this

A million miles from where we burned the bridge

Can't keep pretending everything's going to be alright

With the whole world falling down on me

* * * * * *

"I played that song over and over again while I worked on the statue. It seemed to convey exactly what I was feeling. Sometimes it made me daydream while I worked. I'd imagine all kinds of things. They always revolved around you though."

"I remember dreaming that I was aboard a pirate ship. We were sailing very quickly with the wind at our backs. We were chasing another ship across a churning ocean. It all seemed so real, like I was actually there."

"I could feel the wind ripping across my face. I could feel the weight of the cutlass in my hand. I barked out orders to put on more sails even with the risk of running too much sail in the storm. Nothing mattered to me, not my ship or my crew. Even my life didn't seem to matter as much to me as catching that fucking ship."

"Hour after hour, we drew closer to that ship. When we got within canon range, my first mate ordered the guns loaded. "Belay that order," I screamed. Then I pushed him to the deck. "Any man who fires on that ship will have to deal with me," I screamed."

"Using my spy glass, I could see someone tied to their mast. Of course, it was you Kerri. Just before midnight we were almost on the ship. They unloaded on us with their cannons. They didn't have the same reason not to fire that I had. I lost a third of my crew in their first volley. The second did so much damage to my ship that it was a wonder she stayed afloat."

"They were about to launch their third volley that would probably have sent my ship to the ocean floor when we threw our boarding lines. We pulled our ship over to theirs until we were side by side. The two ships were now locked in a death struggle in the middle of the ocean."

"I was one of the first over the side. The cutlass sang in my hand dealing death with every swing. A big crewman wearing a uniform of some sort stepped between me and the mast you were tied to. His swing at my throat caused me to take my eyes off of you for less than a second. I parried it and swung at his legs, opening a deep gash in his upper thigh. The pain caused him to grab for his leg which cost him his head."

"My slice through his neck caused his head to leap from his body and roll across the deck. Unfortunately for me, while I dispatched him, they'd moved you to the bow. I ran full speed down the length of the ship but it was for nothing. They threw you over the side. I knew that the water was too cold for you to survive or me for that matter but I dove anyway."

"I surfaced in water that was as cold as ice but I couldn't find you. I dove again and again and finally came up with you, but it was too late. I screamed out in pain and frustration. But in the end I'd failed. I was hauled back aboard my ship with my teeth chattering. I was already beginning to go into shock from my plunge into the icy waters."

"Before I passed out, I gave the order to kill all of the survivors. As my eyes closed in the dream, I awakened bathed in sweat back in my studio. Dana was standing in front of me and I had my angle grinder in my hand. The sanding wheel was whirring away and I was just staring into space."

"Dana asked me if anything was wrong. I just shook my head and told her I'd just gotten lost in my thoughts. I shrugged my shoulders and began to sand the statue again. How the he'll could I explain to her that I'd crossed the ocean in my mind to try saving you?"

"Kerri, at that point there was no doubt in my mind that I'd find a way to fix what was wrong with us. I think that you and I had the exact same idea in mind. We both thought that I just needed to get the Commerce Bank sculpture done and over with and then we could try to fix us. I guess in my version I was planning on taking a long break from working. It would be years before I worked again, if ever. I blamed us working so much for us drifting apart. There was no need for it. We had more money than we'd ever spend and it would keep rolling in for years to come."

"I guess that during that period of time, I daydreamed a lot but I also worked myself to the bone trying to complete the statue so I could put our lives back together. I missed you something awful. All the way up until I had to go on the road to promote the prints of some of my earlier pieces. Those prints were a big money maker. We'd also licensed photographs, wallpaper, video game themes, computer wallpaper and even lunchboxes. The prints were, of course, secondary to getting my name out there to have people thinking about me for the bank opening."

"I was also excited because you were supposed to be going on the tour with us. Dana called you four times at the airport. She'd called you three times the previous day. Finally, we got on the plane and left for the tour. That was the beginning of the end."

"When you called during the taping of the Letterman show a few days later, Dana told me after I was done that you'd called. But I was too angry to even think about talking to you."

"That night I gave Dana the job as my new agent. There were no contracts to sign or no notice to give you because I'd never actually signed with your agency. Your agency just sprang up around us."

"After Dana went to her room to sleep, I lay there in my bed thinking about how far Kerri and I had fallen."

"Before I knew it, I was in another dream. This time I was on some type of modern boat. It appeared to be kind of cheaply made. I was wearing a navy uniform. I looked around and realized that I was on a PT-boat in the middle of the ocean. We were heading for an island that was some distance away from us. We were going slowly and had no lights on. It was as if we were hiding from something."

"After a few conversations with the men on the ship, I realized that I was once again in command of a ship. I also realized that the running silent thing had been my idea. We skirted the island and found an area where we could go ashore without alerting whoever inhabited the island."

"After a few minutes, I left the ship followed by four men. We waded through thigh deep water because we didn't dare bring the ship in any closer. In fact, as soon as we went over the side the ship pulled even further out into the bay."

"I looked at a map and took off jogging lightly but quickly through the dense jungle. About two kilometers further inland, we came upon a group of buildings. There were patrols scattered around the buildings and I realized immediately what was wrong even in the dream. I was carrying a gun. I didn't know shit about guns. What made me realize it was seeing the men we were going up against. This was obviously a World War 2 fantasy because the men guarding the buildings were Japanese soldiers. I looked around for an officer and spotted one behind the building to the left."

"That building was as good a place to start as any. We circled around behind it. We came up behind the men guarding the building as well. We took them down silently using knives and choke holds. Then we entered the building after I'd relieved the officer among them of his sword. I felt much better then. The sword, a naval pattern Kyu Gunto, was a custom piece. The sword's typical machine made blade had been replaced by what was probably one of the officer's family blades."