Pauline

Leslie was a little more blunt. "I never liked the bitch. Never. I knew she would break your heart."

Instead of offending me, it made me smile. If your friends ever reached the point that they couldn't tell you the truth then that friendship was in deep trouble. Looking back, I can see how everyone close to me had tried gently to see what they saw but I was so in love I didn't understand.

"You know, you're one of the most intuitive people I've ever met until it come to romantic entanglements. I suggest if there is a next time, you be a bit more pragmatic."

"Sage advice, Carmella. I probably won't take it; some sort of character flaw I guess, but I'll work on it."

"What are you going to do now?"

I don't know. I probably won't stay in Ohio, but beyond that everything is up in the air."

"There's nothing wrong with Ohio."

"Spoken like a true Buckeye, Les."

"You could go back to your old company. It's yours after all. Michael is on the verge of a breakdown. The stress he has to deal with is getting to him."

"Only because he hasn't learned to tell those bitches to shut up and do their jobs. Models are like doctors, they're mostly narcissistic and have a god complex."

Leslie exploded with laughter and Carmella frowned. I strove to correct my mistake. "The exception is you, soon to be Dr. Carmella."

"Nice semi-save, Jas. I know what you meant. To a great degree it's true. That's why you're so good at what you did. You know exactly when to lend a sympathetic ear, or give a sharp kick in the ass. They listen to you, know you keep their best interests at heart. They know they can trust you with their secrets and their life, if it came to it. There's been a bit of a vacuum since you moved on. Time to come back and fill it. You have to admit, it would keep you from getting bored."

"I wasn't bored with what I was doing. It felt good to have average people around me for a change. Know what I discovered the difference was? Nothing. Really. They had their own set of traumas and hardships, the same dreams and ambitions. They may have been more modest and muted, but they were there. They were just as prone to jealousy, anger, retribution, infidelity or any other emotion as supermodels, business magnates or artists, but they mostly had a better grounding. A five thousand dollar raise meant just as much as a five million contract in their eyes, and some would do anything to get it."

"So you're saying everybody sucks?"

"Yes, and no. What I'm saying is we're all pretty much the same creatures of habit and environment."

"Damn, Jas, maybe you should get your own PhD. Not bad for someone who's specialty used to make the beautiful look even more so."

I shrugged and opened another bottle of Andre's excellent wine.

*****

I got back ten days later and cabbed back to my condo, wondering if it would be empty.

It was. On the same dining table I'd left my evidence, there was a simple letter. "I don't know if you're coming back, or if you'll ever read this, if you do, but I want to tell you a few things.

"First, I'm sorry I betrayed you. I really do love you, as much as I can grasp the concept of love. I know on a basic level why I did the things I did, I just can't understand why I keep repeating them. I have a feeling you were my last chance at happiness and I destroyed that pretty thoroughly. I've had a session a day for the last week with a really expensive counselor, thanks to my parents, and he seems to think I'm afraid of real life. His words, not mine. Me, the pampered princess, daughter of one of the richest men in the state, who has almost always gotten what she wanted since she was six, afraid of common things like commitment and children. Especially children. He said in our last session that I was probably the most spoiled person he's ever met.

"I told him about you and he looked you up. I saw most of what he had, and he must have had better investigators or your friends thought it really didn't matter now, but he had quite a different opinion of you. He said your reputation as a hardnosed businessman was well known in the business, as well as your efforts to do the absolute best for whoever you worked with, and your generosity with your friends.

I know you'll never forgive me, and I if I thought I had any chance at all of getting you back, I'd beg on my knees in front of everyone for you to take me back. Instead of the drama, I'm giving you a gift. Get a lawyer, write up a fair divorce, and I'll sign it when my lawyer looks it over. You keep what's yours, I'll keep what's mine, and we'll join the ranks of the once married. I will tell you I took a few things that had meaning to me from the condo. Nothing valuable, just the things that held fond memories for me. If you see something missing that you wanted, just let my lawyer know. I won't fight over whatever it is and return it.

"I know it isn't much, but that's all I can say. I'll always love you, always regret what I did, and wish you a happy life. Think of me from time to time, happy memories, and smile. I will."

She didn't sign it. She didn't have to.

I was in Rob's office the next day and he had a look of profound sadness. "I was really hoping this was the one. Monica and I have grown to love you like the son we always wanted. She's still crying. Maybe you can take her to lunch, or better yet have dinner with us. I know you want to leave, but please, reconsider. I had visions of turning the business over to you and Pauline in five years or so and retiring early, taking Monica on a world cruise or long vacation, then coming home to spoil the grandkids. You would have made an excellent CEO. I doubt Pauline will ever be ready to take the reins. I'll probably sell the businesses when I'm tired of running them."

"Rob, I'll always be grateful for the job you gave me and the trust you had in me, but it's time to move on. I'm sure you knew my answers and are already looking. I hope I'm around long enough to help you, but in thirty days I'm moving to Europe, at least for a while."

I looked up at his fish photo and smiled. "The girls aren't moving, and they'll need a fishing buddy, so I'm sure they'll stay in touch. Make sure Monica keeps playing golf, and make sure you pay the attention to her she deserves. She's stood by you during the long hours and missed celebrations while you built your business, and now it's time to pay it back."

Monica cried when I came over for dinner, almost constantly, but both Rob and I were gentle and understanding, and she actually smiled there at the end. I took her to lunch a couple of times and teased her as Giuseppe drooled over her from afar. Rob and I fished twice more on Holloway Mountain before I left.

I sat on the plane and wondered how he would like my goodbye gift. I'd stood them for membership to the club, paying five years in advance when they were approved. They should be getting the acceptance letter any time now.

I had a visitor two days before I left. I'd already gotten my PA reassigned to a good man, and was just tidying up when I heard the knock.

It was Bob, just plain Bob, and he had a sad smile on his face. "I wanted to talk to you before you left. I'm probably the only one in Ohio who can understand how you feel. She broke my heart and I didn't make it to the marriage. Gina says I shouldn't hold a grudge, but I still have unresolved issues I keep buried. That's not what I wanted to talk about. I want to talk about Gina. She brought me around, showed me that true love was still possible. Seven years in and I'm still convinced she walks on water. You're a good man, Jason. Your Gina is out there somewhere. May good luck follow you in your life from now on."

And just like that he was gone. It did make me feel better.

*****

Eighteen months went by. I spent a month at the Tuscan villa, soaking up solitude and healing. I started out small, but soon I was back in the driver's seat of my old company. I never sold it, just turned the day-to-day operations to my subordinates while I went off and played at being a middle manager.

I dated after a few months, and with my looks, wealth and business connections, I had women throwing themselves at me. It was fun, and getting all sweaty with models and heiresses can never be underrated, but usually by the fourth date they realized I wasn't ready to commit. The ones who wanted substance faded away, the ones that just wanted to have a good time stayed in my orbit. Still, empty fun is better than no fun.

Carmella came to me about with a business deal. She wanted to buy a minority share of my business and give it to Leslie, something she was a bit familiar with and hopefully not take a lot of training. I thought about it and agreed, selling her ten percent with an option to buy fifteen percent more over the next five years.

After that, whenever we did a shoot together, Leslie wore two hats: model and businesswoman. Carmella and I had coached her and she had developed far beyond the shy beauty she had been when she first started.

We contracted with a sports magazine to do a swimsuit spread. Pretty run of the mill stuff until we ran into a problem. There was a young model, just eighteen, who found out she wasn't getting the cover and became a big problem. She disrupted two days of shooting, and in most businesses and especially ours, time is money. Leslie was handling it and she called me, outlining what she was going to do. it sounded like so much fun I dropped what I was doing and flew out to the island location.

I got there just in time to make the meeting between Leslie, the model and her agent. I carried a manila envelope with me, sliding it over to Les. She peeked in and grinned.

The agent started the meeting with the hope that we could work this out. Her stunning natural beauty should assure her the cover and he couldn't understand why we were being so difficult.

Leslie exploded. "Natural beauty? There's hardly a thing natural about your client. She's had a nose job, a hair line adjustment to take out a very pronounced widow's peak, her cheekbones have been shaved, and her lips thinned. I understand she's due some chin work after this shoot. So tell me, where is this natural beauty you go on about?"

She opened the envelope and a photo spilled out of the model when she was thirteen, her mouth full of braces, wearing thick glasses, her thick hair going almost to her eyebrows, with a pronounced hook to her nose, and a chubby face. The model took one look and fainted. She was South American, and there were several countries there where beauty was big business. If you ever see a flawless woman from one of those countries glide across a stage it's a pretty safe assumption that how she looked now was a bit different from her early years.

Les drove her point home. "Regardless of how your client got her beauty, she is still an exceptionally attractive woman. This shoot will be good for her career and maybe in a year or two she'll have a cover. It won't be this year. When your client wakes up tell her that. And tell her that if she isn't on that beach ready to work by noon today, not to bother. I'll replace her in a second. I already have two on standby hoping she stays difficult. You should also tell her that her misbehavior will get around, and good shoots will be a little harder for her to come by, particularly with this company. Is this matter settled?"

I thought the agent was going to break his head off the way it was bobbing. We walked out while he woke her and explained how the real world worked. Models were commodities, like wheat or corn. If it's molded or unfit for use, the price and availability goes way down. The sooner the guys and girls learn this, the better off they are. I do have to say the newer models are a lot savvier and better educated than ten or fifteen years ago, probably because they viewed it as what it was. A business.

Leslie grinned when I told her how well she did. "I didn't even have to mention the vision surgery or the ear tacks. There's probably not one thing that's original equipment on that girl. Can you hang around for a day or so? I have a surprise for you."

"I can stay until tomorrow afternoon. Then I have to meet the crew for some snow shots in the Artic Circle."

Leslie shivered. "I remember my first one. I nearly froze to death. You got the sauna room set up yet?"

"It'll be right behind the cameras. We'll shoot a minute, tops, before we hustle them into the warmth. Nothing motivates you to get it right quite like subfreezing temperatures."

Carmella flew in and I entertained her with stories about what a tough little bitch her lover had turned into. She just smiled and hugged her tighter. We shared the suite Les had rented and spent a nice night talking about old times.

"We went fishing with Rob the last time we were home. Monica still tears up at the mention of you. They can't get over you giving them a membership."

"They deserved it."

"It was also a nice thing you did flying them over to visit you and you mother, as well as her new husband, at his villa. He seems a good man."

"He is. He lost his son in Afghanistan early in the war when the English were still heavily involved, and his daughter died of an accidental overdose at a party. He was pretty lonely until he met Mom."

"I've seen the pictures. You're the closest thing he has to a son left. You should have heard Monica when she talked about how impatient they were getting for grandchildren."

"It's still a bit early to walk that road again. I still have faith the right one will show up."

I thought about their grins as I dropped off to sleep. They were up to something.

*****

Something turned out to be about five feet nothing of Island Goddess. Marta came up behind me, wondering why the girls had wanted her to come here. She had become friends with them and they supported the literary project she headed on her home island. They had five schools going and they all existed solely on donations. I sent a hefty sum twice a year, and I knew the girls had talked their friends into helping out. Thanks to the combined efforts, 220 children got an education, enough to eat for them and their families and clean clothes to wear. Marta hired the best of the parents for support roles, cooking the meals, maintaining the buildings, providing transportation, everything it took to keep the schools running. They hired the very best teachers and paid them well. Their second set of high school seniors were going to graduate soon.

She saw who was sitting with them, let out a shriek that let everyone on the island know she was there, and plowed into me so hard we both went down in the sand. The girls had huge grins on their faces as they helped us up. When I sat down, she sat in my lap and refused to move. After about the fortieth kiss I managed to pry her lips off me to tell her how happy I was to see her.

"I've missed you, my little Island Goddess."

"I know. The priest keeps me informed. Oh, before I forget."

She pulled out a little vial and dusted it across my hair and shoulders.

"What was that?"

"The remainder of the love potion I've been carrying for almost four years. You'll never get away now."

I looked down in her beautiful face and had the thought that maybe I wouldn't try so hard this time.

*****

A year later I was standing under a bower in a garden in Tuscany, waiting for my bride. There was a preponderance of models there, most friends, and a few who wanted to see what kind of woman finally captured my heart.

The string quartet started playing Canon in D and she appeared in a lace and satin gown, a wreath of pearls and lace around her face. She held tightly to the arm of the man escorting her. I had invited Rob and Monica and they surprised me by coming. They had become friends with Mom and my new stepfather, and visited each other twice a year. When Monica met Marta and found out her parents had passed in a plane crash, she stepped in, performing mother of the bride duties. Rob decided if Monica was doing that, it was his duty to present the bride.

When the priest asked who gave the bride, his voice could be heard clearly. "Monica and I do."

My best man grinned hugely. Carmella had on an elegant tux that matched mine ,but left no doubt a woman was wearing it. Leslie was dolled up in a pink creation, standing for Marta as Maid of Honor.

As the sun set on a glorious Tuscan day, with the scent of fresh grapes and new mown hay hanging in the air, Marta and I became one. I lifted the sheer veil from her beautiful face and shared our first kiss as husband and wife. I felt her tiny body against me and imagined I could feel a baby bump, but she was only two months along.

The reception lasted long into the night. The last sight I saw as I took my bride upstairs was of Carmella and Leslie snugged together in a slow dance. Mom and Nigel was just past them, then Rob and Monica.

Everyone was hungover a bit the next morning and a little slow, but when Marta announced that our first child would be arriving sometime in late March, the mood got festive again. I'd flown in two uncles from my father's side, along with their wives, two cousins and their husbands. My grandfather wanted to come, but his health wasn't that good. Marta promised him we would visit within the month.

Six weeks later we were in the mountains of North Carolina, in a big farmhouse. My grandfather was quite taken with the little Goddess. The cousins, uncles, and aunts didn't know quite what to make of us, but they warmed up pretty quick. I took Marta on a few walks along the streams and fields of my childhood. She surprised me with a request.

"Will you buy us a vacation home here?"

I showed her the eighty acres I'd inherited from my father. There was a modest house there and I had a cousin living in it and taking care of the property. Marta wasn't interested in it, she pointed to a bench halfway up a mountain. "There. I want a log cabin there."

Her idea of a log cabin and my idea of a log cabin were completely different. Mine had an open floor plan and hers had two stories and six bedrooms. Guess which one got built. The first time we spent the night in it I knew one of these days we'd come and never leave.

Marta traveled with me in her old position as personal assistant until she got close to her due date. I purposely handed off all my business to my partner Leslie, starting two weeks before the expected date and a month afterwards.

Jason Halston Jr. was an easy birth, according to the doctor and nurses, but I still shudder when I saw how much pain it caused Marta. I wasn't sure I wanted her to experience that again. When I told her my thoughts she stood as tall as her four foot eleven and a half inches would let her and gave me an earful. I never brought it up again.

Two years later Maria joined us, and the year after that it was Angelique. I was ready to stop, but Marta got that expression on her face that told me we'd stop when she was ready to stop.

The next year the twins arrived and Marta finally said enough and closed the baby factory. I got to help name then. The boy was named Andre Robert, for my stepfather and Rob. Tiny little Ashley Monica, after my mother and Monica, would grow up to be an almost exact duplicate of Marta, down to the size. She'd always be the baby of the family and her size may have had something to do with it.

Both sets of "grandparents" doted over the children. Monica picked out a small villa, near my mother, and they bought it. An event had happened that made Rob reexamine his life goals and he sold his businesses for a nice piece of change, and they retired. They lived in Ohio for a bit before relocating to Tuscany. I walked in one day to see them holding the twins while my mother and stepfather grinned at me.