Paying My Dues

Faye spoke first, "Every word she said is 100% true, Quinn. I love you with deep, true, undying love. Tamara and I miss you terribly. We want to be a family with you again. I'm sure this has been a lot for you to absorb in one sitting but we had to perform this intervention to help you see the love all around you. PLEASE choose the first option, and let us come back where we belong so we can all be a happy family again as we were before you exploded everything."

Brandon jumped in, "That's right, Quinn. No hard feelings? I still feel bad about screwing up mom's chances of having you as her daughter. I'm fine with either option one or two. I'll back you 100% either way. I've got your back, always have."

Mom chimed, "Thank you, kids. I'm sure that means a lot to Quinn. Now that you know the whole truth, and I swear that every word of it is factual, what do you want to do? Tell us. Tell us how we can help you get through this. We'll do whatever we can, all four of us together. What's it going to be Quinn?"

All four of them stared into my eyes expectantly, as if some fount of wisdom was expected to be bubbling to the surface of my thoughts. They tried their best to read my mind. I just wanted to escape this living hell they had just put my pathetic soul through.

I looked each of them square in the eyes one last time. "I've been overwhelmed with information overload today. There's no way I can make an informed decision right now. I need time to think about everything I've been told today. I did as you asked. I listened to every word you had to say without raising my voice. You gave me your word that I would be released after hearing it all. I am asking you to honor your word to me now, and let me go."

"But can't you say something, give us a clue? Anything at all about which way you may be leaning? I've told Tamara that you may put our family back together again. Can I please tell her that her daddy might make everything better soon? We love you, Quinn. If you divorce me, it will cost me a million dollars because Tamara isn't eighteen yet. Take us back, Quinn. I'll split that million with you. Think about it, a half-million dollars to spend any way you like," begged Faye.

After all of the revelations that had just been disclosed, if a nuclear bomb had been dropped a hundred yards away from me, I'd have been less surprised.

"I have no answers to give until I think about everything. Give me at least a week or two to sort things out. Please, either kill me or release me," I stated emphatically.

They suddenly realized their predicament. They'd hoped to receive an immediate answer but had agreed to release me once I listened to their presentation. Dad finally nodded to Brandon who removed his pocket knife and sliced the duct tape, freeing my appendages. I rose from the chair, rubbed my wrists a few moments, and left Faye with this parting shot.

"That's all this is about, isn't it, Faye? Money. Three million dollars? I guess that makes you one of the highest-paid whores in the country, doesn't it? You and shit-head may have bought Tamara. You can't buy me. There isn't enough money in the world."

I walked away without another word. As I left the quartet of stunned traitors in my old bedroom, I thought I glimpsed someone quickly exiting the house ahead of me. I briskly walked straight to my car and left without speaking to anyone else at the gathering.

Monday, I received a firm offer from Halvorson Freight located three states away in Kentucky, and accepted their terms, accommodating my start date on the following Monday. They emailed me all the necessary forms and paperwork to fill out online. I was all set. Kendra, my realtor, had found a buyer who was willing to accept everything 'as is' concerning the house. A cash price that was acceptable to me was agreed upon. The closing took place on Thursday afternoon at 1:00. I was given one week from the closing date to clear out. I wouldn't need it past Friday and provided the new investor with a set of keys. All money that I had on hand as well as funds from the sale of the house were deposited into a national online bank.

Tamara was fourteen and a half. She would turn eighteen in three and a half years (42 months). My child support requirements were $400.00 per month. $400.00 times 42 months comes to $16,800.00. I wrote a check for the full amount and dropped it off at my attorney's office. I also signed some other papers while I was there in anticipation of their need. I would not be around to address any further legal matters.

I took Friday off as a vacation day. I rented a small utility trailer, took Tamara's boxed belongings over to my attorney's office, and dropped them off. He said he had a pickup truck he could use to deliver them when it suited his schedule. He would also drop off my child support check at the same time, one day next week. I had him tally his bill. I paid him a handsome tip for doing such a great job for me. If everything went according to plan, they would be dropping Tamara off at my residence at 6 pm. that evening. Only then would it be revealed that I was gone. I did not feel any sense of obligation to tell any of them goodbye or where I was going.

I had one last stop to make before heading out of town. I drove straight to my grandpa's farm. Grandpa wasn't there. Maria, his cook, and live-in housekeeper said he'd gone into town for a meeting. She was unsure when he'd return. When I asked her about Luisa, she winced.

"She lives alone in one of the tenant houses, the blue one."

"I thought she married."

"She did, Quinn. She should receive her divorce decree in a couple of weeks. Luisa fell in love with and married a new hand that came to work for your grandpa several years ago, Alejandro Martinez. He seemed a nice enough man and worked hard to prove his worth. After a couple of years into the marriage, Alejandro became very jealous and controlling. He accused Luisa constantly of infidelity but there isn't a more honest and loyal woman on God's green earth. Evidently, he began physically abusing her. Most of her bruises could be concealed beneath her clothes but when her father, Juan saw her wearing sunglasses indoors, he pulled them off in suspicion. He badgered Luisa until she confessed her abuse. There was no stopping him, Quinn. He beat Alejandro to within an inch of his life. He'd have killed him if four men hadn't pulled him off. Alejandro pressed charges but abandoned Luisa, realizing that his life would be forfeit if he returned to the farm. So, Juan has another six months of his sentence left to serve."

I was shocked to learn that my best friend had suffered so, and I was oblivious to it all.

"I should have been there for her, Maria. We drifted apart. I should have stayed in touch better."

"There's nothing you could have done besides marrying her that would have spared her, Quinn. It's not your fault. That bastard Alejandro knows not to ever show his face around here again."

I cleaned up and rode my horse to Luisa's house while having another horse follow me with the reins. She hugged me fiercely when she saw me at her front door. Within fifteen minutes, it was as if no time had passed between us. Our connection was as strong as ever. We spent the evening riding the outskirts of the farm until dusk, as I recounted the ups and downs of my life since I last saw her. She invited me for supper, and I accepted. She was even more beautiful than I had remembered. She relayed her account of the hell that Alejandro had put her through. Of course, we knew that we were both coming from bad relationships and vowed not to let a rebound relationship occur. But our friendship bond was as strong as it had ever been.

Luisa and I pretended like it was another regular summer visit I was making. We rode together, rocked on her porch, held hands as we walked through the garden, and enjoyed every moment together. Although I didn't want to leave her behind, I knew I couldn't stick around for all the family drama that would soon be unfolding. Before I left, I took her into my arms and made her a promise.

"Luisa, you have always known me to be a man of my word. I would like for us to stay in close contact over the phone after I leave the state. But know this: one day I will return for you, and if you're available when I do, we will build a life together, one step at a time. I hope you'll wait for me. I promise it won't be too long."

I didn't even get a verbal reply. She kissed me so passionately, my toes curled up in my shoes, and I was floored. "Does that answer your question?" She mused.

"Completely," I rejoined.

We rode back to the barn together. She said she'd square away the horses so I could be on my way. One more blistering kiss and I was gone. One final detail was to call my supervisor.

"Carl, this is Quinn."

"Hey man, did you enjoy your day off?"

"Yes, I did. Listen, Carl, the reason I'm calling is to give you my official verbal notice of resignation."

"Resignation? What are you talking about, Quinn? Is there a problem?"

"Let's just say I've decided to move on to greener pastures."

"Are you serious?! You're quitting on me? Do Brandon and your dad know about this? They haven't said a word about it to me."

"Carl, I figured you could check in with them on my behalf if you feel it necessary. It's been a pleasure working with you, man. Take good care of that family of yours. You don't know how fortunate you are to have such a great family. Got to run, now. Bye." I ended the call and turned my phone off.

As I was heading upstate, making my way to Kentucky, Brandon, and Faye drove Tamara to my house for my bi-monthly weekend visitation. As Tamara exited the car and was walking toward the house, she noticed that, uncharacteristically, I wasn't coming out to greet her as I normally did. They decided to wait and make sure she was safely inside the house. After repeated knocking, Tamara shrugged her shoulders at them. Faye and Brandon walked up to the door and knocked loudly. Receiving no response, Brandon decided to try the door. To his surprise, it was unlocked. The three of them walked in while calling my name out loud. It became immediately apparent that the house had been vacated. They checked every room. Even Tamara's room was empty and her belongings were not there either. There was a handwritten note pinned to a wall with a set of keys hanging off it.

To the new owner, here is an extra set of keys. All of the utilities have been turned off and are no longer in my name. Thank you for working with me on such a fast turnaround.

Quinn Davenport.

"What's going on, mom?" Asked a concerned Tamara. "Where's daddy? Did he sell our house? Where is he now? I don't understand. I'll call him." She dials the number. "It says his number is disconnected or no longer in service!"

The three of them stood there in shock and disbelief. This isn't what was supposed to happen.

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

When I reported to work at Halvorson Freight on Monday morning, they had my truck ready for pickup. It was a fairly new model with barely six months of road service. I would be making coast-to-coast long-distance runs, and they didn't want to have to deal with breakdowns that might interfere with guaranteed delivery times. They usually partner new recruits with a seasoned veteran for a week or two but they were short-handed. A very gorgeous, very married secretary explained all of the procedures I would need to employ to stay in proper contact for pickups and drop-offs, as well as how to process my mileage to get paid. It was a large sleeper cab, so I was set. I would have to fit it with a dorm-size refrigerator, microwave, and TV to customize it to suit my needs. My first destination was Idaho. The comprehensive truck-stop-friendly GPS guided my way.

For the next three months, I settled nicely into my new routine. I was required to maintain meticulous records documenting hours on the road and down times. They were sticklers about those details. There were several truck stops where I made friends with other truckers and especially the waitresses. I always tried to be circumspect with them. I had asked my dispatchers, and people in the office to take any messages if anyone called for me, then toss them in the trash. They said no problem. Apparently, I wasn't the only employee who had severed ties with their past.

= = = = = = = = = = =

I dropped off my load at a location in California. It was the end of a long day for me, so I headed to a nearby diner for a sit-down meal, rather than a TV dinner. My food had just been delivered, and I was enjoying my first bites when in walked two unexpected individuals. There's no way this could be a coincidence, on the other side of the country from my ex-dad and ex-brother's residences. Dressed in suits, they both sat down in the booth across from me. I was hungry and was appreciating this good meal, so I ignored them.

Dad tentatively began, "God, Quinn. You have no idea how challenging it was to find you. How have you been?"

I didn't even look up. It irritated Brandon that, not only had I caused him to drive Tamara to an empty house that evening but disliked that I was ignoring our father.

He decided to try his luck with me. "Look, Quinn. We've come a long way just to see you. That should count for something. We wouldn't be here if we didn't care. Why did you turn your back on us and just cut and run as you did?"

I figured the banter could prove amusing, so I responded. "Come to collect on Tamara's child support? My attorney was supposed to deliver a lump sum check for the whole amount in full. Did you not receive it?" I sarcastically inquired.

"Do you think I care anything about your paltry child support?"

"Really? Then why did you cash the check?" I chuckled.

"Look, Quinn," dad inserted. "We didn't come here to argue. We came here to make you an offer. All five of us miss you terribly, especially Tamara. That wasn't right, what you did to her. It leaves emotional scars when a daughter is rejected by her father. She thinks it's all her fault that you left. Not only that, dozens of plant workers ask Brandon and me every day where you are and when you're coming back. We had no idea how influential you were with everyone at the plant. They all seem to think of you as their best friend, or something like that. We want you back, son. We need you to come back. We're prepared to double your salary if you come back with us today. You can stay with your mom and me until you get settled again. It won't cost you a dime. You can't beat that, now, can you?"

"Come back?" I questioned. "Why? So you can humiliate me some more? Or betray me all over again? No thanks. I'm quite happy where I'm at, thank you."

"Is that why you think we're here? You're a unique presence, son, and have made a positive impact on the morale of your coworkers. If not for us, come back for them. What if we sweetened the pot even more? How about a starting salary of two and a half times your previous amount? That's nothing to sneeze at, Quinn. Think about it for a minute, please!" He pleaded.

They seemed desperate, and I had no idea why. However, my mind was made up, "Remember back when you two wrestled me into that chair and had that whore duct tape me to it? As I recall, she offered me a half-million dollars to take her back and let her fuck me. A half-million dollars! If I turned down a half-million, what makes you think I'd be interested in coming back to work for the peanuts you're offering? I was given three options that day. As you can see, I've chosen option number three. I'm divorcing that whore's ass, and I don't need a stinking penny from any of you. Pay somebody else to fuck the whore. She isn't worth it to me."

"Why you damn sissy faggot!" Brandon exclaimed. Apparently, he had become offended at something I said. He moved to grab me from across the table when two of my fellow truckers stepped up to our table.

"Is there a problem, here, Quinn?" One of the truckers asked.

"I don't know, is there?" I inquired as I looked Brandon in the eye and said, "It's impossible to repeal the law of retribution, and one of these days, it's going to catch up with you."

"Come on, Brandon," dad urged. "He's obviously not ready to listen to reason. Let's get out of here."

The two of them unceremoniously left the premises. I thanked my friends for their assistance. It still puzzled me why they pressed me so urgently to return. There's a piece of the puzzle I'm not seeing.

Meanwhile, Luisa and I were growing closer every day, face-timing on our phones, even though we were thousands of miles apart. We made contact nearly every night so we could see each other while we talked. If there was another man involved in Luisa's life, I saw no evidence of it.

Three weeks later, I was in Texas under similar circumstances. After dropping off a load, I was at a luxury full-service truck stop. I had planned on a great steak dinner followed by a shower and shave as my truck was being fueled and inspected. I had just sat down at my table when I was again surprised, this time by Tamara, who grabbed my neck and hugged me fiercely. She was crying, (tears of joy?). I too was happy to see her and hugged her back just as strongly. She was an attractive young lady and was garnering her share of attention in the room.

"What are you doing here, Tamara? I KNOW you didn't come to Texas all by yourself. How on earth did you find me?" I queried.

"Mom and........your brother are outside in a rental car. See?" She waved to the parking lot, and I saw the whore wave back with a big smile on her face. I chose not to reciprocate. "Your dad hired a P.I. like last time to track you down. You're on the move so much it's hard to find you since you don't stay in any one place for very long.

"I see. They were wise not to come inside, and let you come in alone to meet me. Honey, I'm thrilled to see you as always but why are you here? Surely they didn't go to all this trouble just to arrange for you to visit me for a few minutes. There's got to be more to it. What gives, sweetheart?"

"You're right, daddy. But first, I need to know why you sold our house and moved away. You have no idea how hurt I was to learn the hard way that you had abruptly left. Do you hate me that much, daddy to leave without saying a word?" She teared up.

"I'll try to answer your question the best I know how, sweetheart. I could NEVER hate you. I love you now, and always will. Nothing will ever change that. I think you're old enough to understand adult matters at your age. Your mother and my brother have been lovers behind my back for our entire marriage. When I caught them having sex in our bed, I learned that not only had your mother been cheating on me the entire time, that's when I discovered that you were not my biological daughter. Their betrayal was nearly unbearable. But I fought tooth and nail for you, to have joint custody. You were the only bright spot in my life. When the judge ruled I could have temporary visitation with you every other weekend, I was thrilled. At last, I'd get to see my daughter again. But every single time you came over to visit, you begged me to give up our precious little time so you could go and have fun with your friends. When you called me Uncle Quinn, it nearly killed me. When I found out they were buying your love with money I didn't have, I realized I had lost you. I could never compete with what they could provide. I left so you wouldn't have to feel bad about ignoring me for them."

Tamara was crying after hearing the painful truth. "But they insisted that I call you Uncle Quinn and to treat you indifferently. Mom said that if I did that enough times, it would force you to let us come back home as a family. That's what I really wanted. They both swore it would work, daddy, they SWORE!"