Poppy Seed Ch. 01

"(Tee he, Babs went lesbian in the elevator just now with a young woman and I saw it! Whisper, whisper, no, no, that's a purdy boy and his dick still works and I saw it! Tap, tap, text, Barbara is testing the myth that three is enough and I saw it! Whisper, whisper, Babs is switching some crossdressing funny boy back over by stripping down to her stockings and heels in the elevator and I saw it! Tap, tap, text, Babs just let her boobs out for the purdy boy for the win and I saw it! Tap, tap, text, Barb is pregnant and the father is the entire Bellhop staff and they have a cute purdy boy on the side to keep it spicy and I saw it! Whisper, whisper, Babs is letting some cute little purdy boy adjust her feeder bra in the elevator and I saw it! Whisper, whisper, Babs just her tits out in the elevator for everyone in lobby and her bitch boy is milking them towards the glass doors and I saw it!"

Well, gossip machines, right?

[Grr, brr, grr, brr, the glass elevator glides slowly up]

"So, you are, hmm?"

"Oh [shakes off the rumor mill], um, I'm Poppy Seedy and I'm here with a couple of my friends for the Hero Con weekend, so?"

"Oh, well then, I'm sure many men have popped off over your booty, so, that tracks. I'm Mrs. Bills and I may or may not be on the meow cougar hunt this weekend, you know, if you know anyone who wants to play their poker cards my way, Poppy Seed, so?"

LOL, I've been many a name before, but I've never been called a pimp!

"Tee he, you can my pimp for the weekend!"

Fine, I've been a pimp once, but just then.

[A low ding as the elevator passes the second floor]

"I mean, Mrs. Bills, I'm not saying anything, but I might be hanging out by the ice machine later tonight in case you sneak out to fill your ice bucket in a negligee, um, purple or something sheer, um and not for because I know what to do with a woman, um, but for, um..."

"LOL, that's how I hooked my first boyfriend back in the day, Poppy Cock, I mean Poppy Seed."

[Ding, the elevator doors swoosh open on the 3rd floor]

"Don't you dare post any photos of me on some stupid "caught & posted" website, Poppy Seed! Well, not without my approval first, ta, ta."

[Another pair of shuffling feet]

"Hold the elevator, please."

[Poppy Seed didn't even bother looking this time and just held the elevator door open]

"Thanks. [Mr. Wide Eyes inhales] also, you're my Hero Con girlfriend, right?"

Stupid nerds who think those ads in Gamer's Monthly are real.

"Oh, no, but are you here in the hotel for Hero Con because your step momma rented you a hotel room for you and your nerd crew because that's still how it works for you, hmm?"

Well, I didn't mean to make him cry.

"Going down."

[Oh, the super nerd heard that]

"[Sniffle] oh, you feel sorry for me and you're going down on me then [sniffle]? And what's your name since you're weekend hotel girlfriend, huh?"

[Again, the hotel needs to change its name to the "no, no" hotel]

"Oh, no, no, none of that is happening, but come on, get up off of the floor [grunt]."

[Ah, that was a fake grunt from Poppy Seed because Poppy Seed can't lift that amount of basement arm chair belly fat]

"[Sniffle] but I promise that when I lay down that my belly rolls and then flops out of the way [sniffle]."

"Um, no, ewe, no, ewe, um, OMG, how long does it take this elevator to go down 3 floors!"

[Oh, again, the big bellied nerd heard that]

"Really? Did I just finally win?"

Um, well, you knew it was coming folks, so, no, no.

[Ding, finally, the elevator reaches the lobby level and the doors swoosh open]

"Waah, waah, waah [gets a dainty foot push out of the elevator and huh, his belly saved him]

"Hold the elevator, please! [Dodges the flaying nerd belly as it rolls into the lobby area]

[Feet scurry, roll, roll, huh, a mini house keeping cart, scurry, roll, roll]

"Whew, thanks, whoa, um, thanks, um, I'm supposed to use the service elevator, but it's messed up and sticks between the 3rd and 4th floors sometimes, so, well, floors 4, 5, 6, 7 & 8, but we'll start with the 4th floor since I don't want you push all the buttons right now, so, 4 please."

[Huh, are housekeeping uniform skirts the same as club skirts these days?]

"Um, I'm Poppy Seed and I'm the part time elevator operator and I like starched and crisp fabric and some people have had nice things to say about my appearance before, so.]

[Um, Poppy Seed should have just said that he carried a watermelon, but whatever since her response was that left hand flash that girls learn from page 3 of the playbook. And everybody knows that the ring finger is the 2nd place people look anyways]

"Well, Poppy Seed, I appreciate the ride, I mean, for some stupid reason, it's trending around the hotel that brushing teeth together is a thing and half of the rooms have requested extra hand towels! Also, Margo from the front desk and her boyfriend needed some spice to save their relationship, so, good job, Poppy Seed, good job!"

Sarcasm? I'm asking.

[Ding, it starts with the 4th floor, I guess.]

"You would totally rock white thigh highs with little white bow ties! And I carried a watermelon, so?"

"Darla, sweetie. And stay away from my boyfriend because your spice might put me on ice!"

[The elevator doors swoosh closed and then, OMG, they swoosh open]

"Maybe some little Poppy Seed bagel will get lucky tomorrow at shift start and catch me off guard in a photo while slightly lifting my crisp housekeeping skirt to make an adjustment to the white bow ties on my white thigh highs by the ice machine, bye."

[The elevator doors swoosh closed and then, OMG, they swoosh open, again]

"Ahem, I'll have to approve the "caught off guard" photo first, of course."

[The elevator doors swoosh closed and then, OMG, they swoosh open, again because housekeeping wears black on Friday's and Poppy Seed needed to know that?????]

"Whew, I thought you slipped away with the elevator, oh, hit the stop button and let's get acquainted then! I'm Darrin and I'll forget all about playing poker for an hour with you! What's your name and what's your game then, huh?"

"Oh, Darrin, um, my name is Poppy Seed and my current game is part time elevator operator and I may not be the worse date ever, but I'm in the running for a trophy and I carry watermelons, so?"

[Ding, the doors swooshed closed which caused Poppy Seed to sweat]

"Well then, Poppy Seed Body McGee, the way I see things for this long weekend, I mean, I'm banging you with condom later tonight and then you're sucking me silly tomorrow afternoon before the poker tournament starts and then I'm going bare back crazy on you Saturday night while we roll around on my poker winnings and then, to finish things off proper, you're swallowing my cock on Sunday morning as a great way to say goodbye, so?"

[See? These are the pickup lines that transitioning people have to deal with and why Poppy Seed was sweating a bit. But, wait for it...]

"Um, no, no, just like the new name of this hotel, no, no, none of that is going to happen, Darrin! But I might accidently slip in a quick twerk at the ice machine if you figure how to get my, um, my friend into a game for tonight or for tomorrow night, Friday, so?"

"OMFG! The ice machine, Poppy Seed? What are you, a teenager?"

[Thinks about age, um, well, next week is my 20th, so, yeah, technically, yeah, I am!]

[Ding, it's about time the elevator hit the lobby level!]

"[Squawk, squeal] attention hotel guests, for the last time, the hotel is not, I repeat, not offering a class on "brushing teeth together" in the Rose Room! Also, it's not that hard, people [squeak, squawk]."

Hey, don't look at me. I'm just the elevator operator.

[Several shuffling feet approach the elevator while it's still at the lobby level]

"Oh, the elevator is here, um, 7 please. Now, Mildred, for the last time, when your tooth brush goes to the left, then your fat booty goes to the right! It's a sequence."

"Ahem (and lean forward)."

"See, Susan? I told you! The girl with an Adam's apple knows! You have to do it like this, now, watch me."

[I cannot verbally describe that. Also, OMG, I need to have that shaved down!]

"OMFG, Mildred, that's just, well, not everyone has the Rocky Mountains on their chest, so."

[I do not need to verbally describe that. Other than to say just under Mrs. Bentley]

"(Giggles)"

[Ding, the elevator doors swoosh open of some unknown floor because Poppy Seed was searching for tracheal surgery openings and costs on his phone]

"Hold the elevator please! It's Hero Con weekend and I'm excited!"

[Shuffling feet, oops, a trip, a tumble and a roll and whoa, a bounce back up straight up! Smooth move.]

Lobby please, oh, uh-oh, Palmer..."

[Oh, Poppy Seed shushes Gene! With his lips instead of just a finger!]

"[Mwah], hush, Gene, it's Poppy Seed now, so?"

"But, but, but, but we..."

[Oh, shushing people with the lips must be Poppy Seed's thing now, like all of a sudden]

"[Smooch] we almost and then we kind of did and then we went back to almost, Gene."

"Yeah but, yeah but, yeah but..."

[Alright, already, find a hotel and get a room! Oh.]

"[Smooch] it was amazing, Gene. Best swim ever! Well, you talk now about that day, um, that night, so?"

Well, he passed out in the elevator because holy shallow water sand bar 10pm swim, that was a swim to remember!

So, let me tell you a little about and it all starts with why do they even call Lake Sheen a lake anyways when it's more a huge sand bar for about 1/3rd of the way out, hmm? But it's nice to be able to wade out so far and never be over the chest line until you hit the drop off and by the way, with how swallow the sand bar area is, I mean, mm, bath water almost, right?

But that's just the lake. What had happened one evening last summer while Karla's family hosted what I guess was a second graduation party, there was a bunch who attended and had a day of fun in sun on swallow lake, but then what had happened was, um, but it seemed natural to everyone but me, so, I went with the flow. I also went with flow because Gene arm hooked me, I mean, chose me, but here's what happened since I wasn't expecting that at all.

It was nearing the 10pm hour and everyone was sitting around the grassy area of the beach and just like they did it all the time or every year, I mean, two by two, the people started to stand up and walk towards the shoreline and then they just stepped into the water and started to, um, water mingle???

I mean, nobody took their jeans off or their shorts off or even their sweat pants off! They just started to wade around the way they were dressed and as astonishing as that was, Gene was not going to leave me behind and he didn't and before I knew, I was a swallow water 10pm wading date! Just like everyone else.

Except that I threw a hissy fit under my breath because my designer warm up suits cost like a bazillion dollars, so, I slipped out it and then took Gene's arm for guidance. Besides, I wear nice activewear and all I had to fight off was the moonlight. And Gene, but I suppose that comes with being a water wading date at 10pm.

Also, for another time, how does it work with lakes that the swallow area sand feels like soft carpet under your feet, but take one step on the drop off and it's ick, ewe wet weedy squishy under your feet just that quick! For another time.

Because, mm, mm, if you don't know what happens to cotton sweat pants that are lake soaked after you waded out about a bit with someone and you pop a boner, I mean, there are no secrets! Um, my point being that, tee he, there was no way in hell that Gene was going to exit the lake in that condition with the moonlight beaming down on it! And if you don't believe me, slip your sweat pants, surf my selfies and jump in a lake! Boink! LOL, no secrets.

And no, no, LOL, I didn't mind. It was actually a little mesmerizing. And challenging. And my activewear is tough enough to get off when it's dry, so, I happily went along with what I call 10pm wading, which is different than nighty, night sleepy time brushing teeth together.

And I didn't even complain when Gene swung around and positioned himself behind since that allowed me to see who was where and who was watching us. And apparently, reaching back and length testing his soaking wet sweat pants was a huge hit with Gene! I mean, like just five or six times. And the length measurement test results came back as two hands and a built-in space between us. Or, and the third measurement was, tee he, Gene probably wished I was taller! But he figured it out.

[Humps along with the gentle 10pm wave movements]

"You're not calling me out, Poppy Seed, huh?"

"Gene, hush your voice because it will carry right over the surface of the water in this night air! And I'm calling you out because, um, this feels rather nice, but my activewear is more like a chastity belt than anything else when wet, mind you, so?"

[Oh, really? Finger hook around the upper waistline seam, wiggle, push, wiggle, push, swoosh!]

I did not help Gene. Tee he, there wasn't enough time before my activewear went swoosh down!

But I didn't fight it since we had our private wading space and since, damn, the feel of human skin, right?

And not to break up my wading thigh sex story, I mean, I had to bend over to grab my activewear shorts, right? I mean, no, no, mascara and water don't mix well. Just check out your girlfriend after she gets caught in rain storm. I mean, can you spell massive mascara splotches? Which might be a wild look for a Halloween party, but not for sneaky thigh sex in the wading lake. Well, for when exiting the water anyways, but tee he, nowhere near as bad a wet sweat pants, boing, boing, boner!

[Rub, saw the cake with a mushroom knife, rub, poke, poke, rub, rub, split the valley, poke, rub]

"Gene, no, no, that's not my thigh gap from the rear, so, no, no, not there, I say!"

Oh, that was a little forward reverse déjà vu then, right?

[Gene has water in ears from wading in lake and doesn't hear that, apparently]

"Prop back just a little further, Poppy Seed, we're almost home."

[You readers have water in your ears and did not hear that correctly because Poppy Seed is innocent]

"(Yelp!)"

[Some people may have heard that]

"Hello? Elevator operator, hello? Quit gawking at your boyfriend since he's passed out on the elevator floor and get me to the lobby! I need a new tube of tooth paste! Also, tee he, his dick looks like it might be longer than your body is thick, tee he, um, oops, the lobby, please!"

"Oh, um, sorry, ma'am, I was just day dreaming about our water wading date last year, so, um, the lobby it is then, um, you talk now, ma'am."

"Tee he, waist deep wading is how I hooked my first boyfriend! And had my first butt sex because everyone knows that's how you do it in shallow water! Anyways, I hope the lobby is above us because I haven't gone down since the next day after the wedding, so?"

"Um, no, no, ma'am, the lobby is a couple of floors below, but I'll hum elevator noise and music in reverse so you don't have to think about going down, ahem, especially since you're already down on your knees and humming my shallow lake boyfriend!"

[Oomph, slush, hum, oomph, gasp, oomph, hum, slurp, oomph, suck, oomph, gasp, gag, ooh, gag, ooh]

"Well, were you going to do, hmm, purdy boy? Men have to have it or they die! Also, you heard me just say that your boyfriend's cock is longer than your body is thick, right?"

"Next stop, the lobby."

[Grr, brr, grr, brr, the glass elevator hums slowly down]

End Poppy Seed 01