"Pretending" to Make Out

This was unusual for me. I'm not attracted to guys my own age, and ordinarily I'd never let one of them anywhere near my vagina. Indeed, before I'd agreed to even consider Beth's idea for a creative payment option, I'd demanded three references. I'd only agreed to this, in the end, because he'd obligingly provided four. And so it was that I'd sat in Harborside Book and Tea with Tracey Yamaguchi, the most convincing of the whole quartet, as she gushed about him. But, to hear her tell it, she'd gushed a lot more last time she'd been with Jason.

"I'm telling you, Heid," she urged, her Valley Girl tones not quite hidden by her low whisper, "he's the real deal. You've totes got to try him."

I wasn't sure. My interest in older men was well known. "Like, what's so great about him?"

Her gorgeous eyes took on a faraway look as she remembered, a dreamy smile emerging slowly. "Mmm. Like, there's this thing he does... it's hard to explain. I think he, like, won the Outstanding Student Award in anatomy last year, so he just, like, knows what's supposed to go where. Like, he really knows what a cunt looks like." I repressed a frown; I dislike the word.

I selected a bagel bite from the basket we'd ordered. "How far underneath does he go?"

She sipped at her latte. "Girl," she murmured, shaking her head, "if you let him, he'll shove his tongue so far up your shitter he'll end up licking your colon."

Well. That, I decided, I had to see. We'd agreed on a 50% discount if he could make me cum.

And he really was excellent. He was craning way, way back now, my hips going crazy over his face, and he was taking every goddamn thing I could give him. Vaguely I heard my own gasps echoing against the high ceilings, and I clamped down hard on my knuckle just as he did the same to my clit.

I was exploding.

Fuck, even his nose was in just the right place, pressing insistently against my navel, adding a little extra excitement. Both thumbs were busy lower down, at the bottom of my slit, punctuating everything like a pianist's left hand. "Oh, mother bitch!" I gasped, unable to stop myself, and he just kept nibbling away, and the maple-syrup creep of my own juices was already starting to tickle my inner thighs. My nipples were in agony, like they usually got when I was really turned on. I tossed my hair back, my whole body arched across the bannister behind me while my legs quivered over the guy under my skirt, and that's when I saw Mr Norlin watching me from the top of the stairs.

Jesus fuck, I hadn't heard him approach, but in fairness I'd been a bit preoccupied. The lighting back here sucked, leaving him in shadow up at the top step, but I could see how wide his eyes had gone. He said nothing; he stood there with his stainless steel travel mug shining in his hand, his other hand resting on the bannister as if he'd just been ready to come skipping down the stairs.

A lesser woman would have immediately flushed scarlet, dismounted, and fled in shame, leaving the brave Jason to take the rap. But I didn't even consider it. I'd like to say I was bold and confident, daring him to come down and stop me, but that wasn't it. Actually, I was simply feeling so fucking great that I was quite incapable of stopping. I was moving easily now, thrashing over Jason's long tongue, only now I was staring straight up at Mr Norlin.

He left after just a few moments, but it seemed longer; one of my hands was already creeping desperately toward my left tit, the bigger of the two, in a vain effort to drag my bra cups away and give myself a little relief, and I knew I could have totally ripped my dress off and cavorted naked in front of my teacher then and there, and my overheated libido would have given precisely no shits.

But like I said, he left before I could get my raw nipple out into the air, and a few seconds after that Jason Bennett stuck his finger experimentally into my asshole and I wasn't thinking of much else after that.

Afterward, Jason was transparently proud of himself as I stood there trying to decide whether I could decently put my soggy underwear back on. His dick was hard, I'd noticed, which I appreciated; I like a guy who gets aroused when he makes his woman cum. "So, the paper got an A," he smiled. "Thanks."

"No, thank you." I made my decision, and chucked the nasty thong down the stairwell. "That was great. Tracey wasn't lying; you're very talented."

He still smiled, but his forehead wrinkled. "Tracey..."

"Yamaguchi?" His eyes lit up in understanding.

"Right. The Japanese chick." He shook his head slightly; he seemed to remember something funny about her. "Yeah. She was... different."

I opened my pocketbook to find him a breath mint. "So, we're square," I mused, debating about whether to extend our business arrangement. Eventually, I nodded; I'd never forgive myself if I didn't make another try for his tongue. "Um, if you've got any more papers you need me to write, I'm happy to." I held out the mints. "Same price."

He took two. "Sure! My teacher thought my paper was killer. We'll make plans; I've got another essay due on the fourth." He eyed me up and down. "You're pretty hot, Heidi. You and me should hook up sometime."

I smiled wryly. "What do you think we just did, dumbass?"

"No, no, no," he chuckled. "That was business. I mean, you know... hook up."

I patted him on the shoulder. "You're sweet, Jason, but I only fuck older guys."

"Really?" He sounded disappointed. His hand was massaging the front of his pants, just absently masturbating. I hadn't paid much attention, but now I did. "Because, you know... If you want, you could give me a little sucky-sucky?"

I laughed in his face. "If I want? Shit, Jason, like I'm going to beg to suck your dick?" I shook my head. "No, I'm late for class already. Besides, I don't owe you shit. This was your payback, remember?" I might have done it anyway, but I didn't like his attitude. That sense of entitlement... "So, the fourth?"

"Maybe after that?" he said hopefully, his fingers still busy. "I'm dying here."

"I'll give you some privacy, then," I winked. "Bye, Jase. Just email me that assignment."

"Sure." He winked and started to unzip himself. "Oh, and can you, like, trim a little better next time? It was a little rough."

"Oh, shit. Sorry Jase; I'll make sure." Christ, how rude of me. "You didn't mind the landing strip, though?"

"Naw, naw. A little hair is cool." Just a normal, light conversation about pubic grooming, the essence of modern high schools. "See you, Heid."

"Ta ta." I passed my underwear a couple flights down, just another bit of garbage for the custodians to pick up. It was already out of my mind.

* * *

Okay, so yeah. Maybe I was ready for things to be a little strained after that. Of course, I certainly didn't care that he'd seen me, but I figured Mr Norlin probably would. So I was ready for some awkwardness the next day as I ventured back into his room with my lunchbag in hand. "Mind if I eat here?" I asked cheerily from the door.

Surprise! His blue eyes were the same as they'd ever been: benign, cynical, and glued to my body. "Sure. Come on in."

Excellent. I used my normal sashay, nothing too extreme, as I headed for my seat. I'd been sure not to wear a skirt again; I didn't want to trigger the poor man, not so soon. So I was back in my alternate outfit: tights.

Of course, given my underwear choice, he was probably triggered anyway.

I took my seat and dug out my salad. He was staring at me, heavy-lidded, sitting back in his rolling chair, and I could see I'd have to be the one to do the heavy lifting here. I let the silence stretch a bit more. He'd be imagining me as I'd been in the stairwell yesterday, wild-eyed and stinking of pussy and sweat. I liberated my fork, applied my dressing, and then sighed. "I didn't sleep well last night, Mr N," I confessed at last. True: Chip had been feeling adventurous.

"No?" He was doing smoked turkey on rye today. He watched me carefully.

"No. I was worried that, you know, you'd look at me differently now," I lied. I blinked over at him disingenuously, already prepared for his silence. "I don't want to disappoint you, Mr Norlin."

"Oh. Uh, you didn't," he replied. Norlin's not an idiot, but it was still just his second year, and I doubt there's a class in teacher school about how to deal with students after you've seen them receiving oral. Not that that would have mattered, though; he had no idea what he was up against in me, anyway. I shrugged.

"It's just something that kids do. Normal kids." I forked some endive into my mouth, careful not to drip; the dressing was impossible to get out of my clothes. "I try to be a good girl."

"I'm sure." He took another bite of his sandwich. "It was just really, really surprising, is all."

I allowed myself a small laugh, a rueful one. "Yeah, I'll bet." Silence again; it had worked last time, so why not this time? I waited him out.

"I guess," he began slowly, "I should stay away from that back stairwell when I'm on hall duty."

"I know, right?" I nodded seriously. "Nothing good happens back there. You remember Seth Gamble and Brenda Chang."

It was out in the open now, and he was nodding right along with me. Good. "Scary shit."

"Watch your mouth, Mr Norlin," I chided gently, and then I was smiling, and he was smiling, and the tension as oozing out of the room just as I'd oozed out into little Jason Bennett's mouth yesterday. I scratched absently at my neck. "Seth slashed your tires after that, I heard."

"All four," he sighed, and then he was looking at me a little mischievously. "You wouldn't do that, would you?"

"I'm hurt at the accusation," I shot straight back, and the flirt was back on. "Still," I mused, frowning, "April Fool's is right around the corner..."

He snickered. "Are you the prankish sort, Heidi?"

"Shit, Mr N, you have no idea." I was, too. Ever since childhood, I've tended to surround myself with the kind of friends I could dominate easily. I'd trick them at Halloween, pinch them on St Patrick's, and prank the shit out of them for April Fool's. I'd only quit doing it to Beth a couple years ago, out of boredom: she was far, far too easy to tease. Such a prude, really; I mean, she's obviously not a virgin, and sometimes she'll blow stoners for extra pot, but for the most part she's just so disapproving of everything.

Shit, but it would be fun to get her again this year...

I shook my head. The Flirt had no time to think about Beth. "Oh, and I just wanted to make sure to stick up for Jason, too." Not as much as Jason had been sticking up for me, of course, but still. "I know he's in your other class."

"Jason?" He looked confused, but then I remembered: the kid had been under the skirt. Norlin had no idea who'd been eating me out yesterday. I hadn't counted on that; I should have quit talking earlier. But I recovered fast.

"Sure. That was Jason Bennett yesterday, back in the stairwell with me. I thought you knew." I was packing up my shit with my usual well-practiced motions. He frowned.

"I didn't know you two were dating," he said blandly.

I laughed richly at that one. "Oh, that's funny!" He was looking on with a half-smile as I giggled. "Me and Jason, dating. No, that's not what's going on."

"I guessed that."

"Right. No, I did some homework for him." I zipped my backpack, then glanced over at him mischievously. "Not the Spanish homework," I added saucily. "Just English. Then he... well, he sort of paid me back, you know." I straightened slowly and slung my backpack, watching him closely.

He took the bait. "It's just something that kids do, right?" he replied flatly. "Normal kids?"

I smiled broadly. "I knew you'd understand. And, uh, I'm not sure he or I would do any better if the administration knew... right?" A wink and a wave. He sighed. "See you later!" And when I left, I did so with maximal sashay. He'd earned it; it had been a tough conversation.

I swear, I should teach a class. Manipulating Younger Teachers 101. I'd never have gotten away with any of this shit with someone like Mr Bacon.

* * *

Mr Norlin's question about pranks had got me thinking dangerous thoughts that night as I sat around, bored. I get myself into some weird shenanigans when I get bored. I'd lost my virginity that way, on a dare, to a nameless thirty-year-old guy my friend Gia had met at a party. Hell, I'd only hooked up with Dave the first time because I'd finished my homework early, and Beth was grounded and couldn't come over.

And now I was musing about Beth, and the vaguely insulting way she looked at me sitting with Mr Norlin, and I started getting ideas. I'd never had a pet teacher before. And hell, April Fool's was coming...

Yeah, she was definitely no angel, our Elizabeth Sheely. Aside from her occasional pothead favors, she and I had done a little bit of fumbling of our own. We hadn't really meant to; once again, I was bored, and I'd basically gone all freaky on her late one night after her parents had gone to bed. She'd been pretty game, too; it was the first time I'd ever seen a pussy up close like that, and I'd been fascinated. I wouldn't say either one of us had enjoyed it all that much, but if you know what I mean, we hadn't really unenjoyed it either. She surely hadn't been shy at the time, not at all.

And now she was judging me.

I loved her, and wanted only great things for her. I might not have died for her, but I'd certainly have killed for her. But she was annoying me, and so she needed to be put in her place, and my pet teacher was giving me the germ of an idea about how I might do that. If I could get Mr Norlin to go along.

I'd ask him tomorrow. No time like the present. My phone picked that moment to warble, my calendar app telling me I didn't need to be bored anymore: Chip was on his way to pick me up. I sighed. It was difficult sometimes, being a sexy bitch.

But I always seem to manage.

* * *

"So, I've got a really weird idea I need to run by you, Senor," I began, my voice carefully modulated. I was fresh and clean in a short dress and fishnets, with a pair of clunky black combat boots. I'd brought it all with me to Chip's, and then I'd insisted on showering. It was a rush, doing that in a coed bathroom. The shower stall next to me had been running at one point, while I trimmed my pussy, and it had been deeply thrilling to think there might be some strange naked boy in there, separated from me by nothing but the cheap partition. "Like, really weird. Like, the kind of idea I'm almost scared to mention."

The hook sank right in. Mr Norlin sat back in his chair. He must have already eaten; he'd had a free period the hour before. He had nice eyes, really, when you stopped and paid attention to them. "Well. Come on, Heidi," he shrugged. "You can't leave me hanging now."

Oh, I wouldn't. The man got a boner very time he looked at my legs; once he heard what I had to say, no part of him would be hanging. It would all be painfully hard. I was across from him now, in one of the detached chairs he kept for group work, just on the other side of his desk. I thought about putting my own feet up, right next to his, but then I decided that would be a bit too much. "Well... Forget it. It's too creepy."

He blinked. "Uh, Heidi," he said in a quiet voice, "remember what I saw on the stairs. If that's not too creepy, nothing else is."

On cue, I brightened. "Hey! That's a good way of looking at it!" I sipped some juice, swished it around in my mouth, and launched right in while I speared an olive. "So, like, you know Beth thinks we're sleeping together, right?"

He blinked at me, looking oddly like an ostrich. I popped the olive into my mouth and had it halfway chewed before he remembered how to speak. "Huh. Like, you and me?"

"Oh yeah." I was calm, the breeze from the open window fluttering my hair. "She totally thinks we're having an affair." The olives were good; not too tart. "She tends to get all judgey about me and my sex life, is the thing. Or," I laughed shortly, "as you'd say, my love life."

He looked as though he'd rather be anywhere else. "Um, Heidi, this isn't really a conversation I think we should have."

"No no no," I said in my best Spanish accent, wagging my finger. "Come on. You told me not to leave you hanging, remember? Besides," I shrugged, "this isn't what it sounds like. I'm not here to unburden my soul to you, the caring adult." I grinned slowly, almost cruelly. "I'm here to ask you if you'll help me out with a little April Fool's prank on my dear friend Beth."

He perked up, thinking he'd have a way out, thinking there was no way I could get him into trouble. Shit. He had no clue. But then, again, I honestly wasn't trying to get him into a jam. Just like I'd never meant to turn him on. I swear. "A prank..." He turned his head and looked at me sideways. "I'm intrigued. But, uh, is she telling people you and I are... like..."

"Fucking?" I asked innocently, my eyebrows ascendant. Jesus. He just couldn't get that thought out of his mind, the wicked little man. "How would I know? She's pretty quiet, though, so I wouldn't worry much. No," I sighed, "I'm not concerned about that." Not from Beth, at least. Was he blind, or just willfully ignorant? Juana and Ana and at least half our class probably figured we were knocking boots; Elizabeth Sheely was the least of his problems. "But she believes it, and I want to use that against her in a little... well, like a skit. A prank skit."

His blue eyes narrowed. "And, what, you want to use my room for this skit?"

Well no, actually, I'd been planning on the athletic offices down in the basement, but whatever made him happy. "I knew you'd agree!" I gushed, and I even clapped a couple of times; not because I like to applaud, but because I knew he liked to see my breasts bounce. He hadn't agreed, really, but he had now. "We'll definitely do it in here. And actually," I went on casually, "that'll make it easier. More believable. When she sees the skit, I mean." I was coming at this from a roundabout way. My psych teacher had taught us that people who commit to a small act will agree to a bigger one later, and he'd already committed to helping me. "Thanks for hooking me up, Mr N; you're awesome." I sipped some more juice. "See, that's why you're my favorite teacher."

He hesitated, knowing there was more. "So what's the skit?"

Here it was. We'd see if my psych teacher was right. "Right. Well, she usually drives me home." My deadbeat parents couldn't afford a car, and Chip was leery about letting me drive his with no license. Whatever. "So I won't be there after school on April Fool's. She'll get impatient. She'll come into the building. She'll figure I'm here, like we're chatting or something." We. In my mind, he and I were already a team. "Make sense so far?"

"Go on." He was leaning his chin on his fist now.

"So she comes in, and she sees us making out, and we turn to her and shout, 'Surprise! April Fools!' And then she freaks out, and that's the prank." I returned to my juicebox, shrugging again. It struck me as a completely simple, practical prank, and no harm done. "What do you think?"

Mr Norlin just stared at me, as I guess I'd expected. "Wait. Back up," he said, his voice a little hoarse. "We're not making out."

"Of course we're not making out," I scoffed. "It's not real, Mr N. It's acting. We're just pretending like we're making out, but see, she won't know that." I rubbed my hands together. Jiggle, jiggle jiggle. "She'll be totally freaked out."

Not yet, though. No, right now the only one freaking out was Mr Norlin, and for the life of me I couldn't figure out why. It really did mean nothing, at least to me; I hadn't expected any real difficulty from him. "We can't do this, Heidi," he insisted, agitated, his feet in frenzied nervous motion.