Prolific: Farm Life Multiplied

I looked at Ann, and put on my business hat. "I want to be fair, but ... I think I could get more than $500 for a room here, especially since they're huge rooms. If you help out cleaning, too, say, some number of hours a week?"

Ann was excited by this idea. "Glad to!!! I really would be, like, SOOO much better than where I am now."

And, with that, it was settled.

I looked at them and said, businesslike, "So, we agree then. I think we have to ... decide on house rules, though? To keep things clear? No surprises, that'd be good, I ... maybe?"

They nodded kind-of sideways, implying I should continue, so I said, "First, uh... no alcohol? Or, at least, no getting drunk, no crazy-making. I had too much of that in the dorm and... otherwise. Okay?"

They nodded. I flashed a thumbs-up and we all did it, so we'd gotten that one down.

Ann's face came over kind of worried, and she said, "Okay, I have one. It's that... my room is, Mine. That is, you don't get to walk in anytime, it's mine. You have to knock and wait for permission, and I might say no."

I raised an eyebrow as if this was self-evident. "Duh, of course. Easy, yes."

Yee piped up and looked at Ann and then me and said, "Yes. This. Me, same."

I shrugged, "Of course."

(I didn't echo this because frankly it'd be crazy for them to come into my room - they were soooo much better looking than me, that'd clearly never happen).

Thinking a little more, I looked at the table, and back up at them, and thought about all the things that could go wrong.

Deciding, I gave voice to it. "Okay, one worry I have. Not a rule yet?"

I stood up from the table and paced on my side of the table twice, working up the courage to phrase this without offending them.

They waited, and finally I said, "When I saw you today, both of you, I thought, 'Wow, they... you, are... uh, Seriously Beautiful?!' So, now you know, and I guess my worry is, I'm not supposed to stare, right? But, I know me, and if you're around me, I might stare - accidentally stare - at you, both of you, sometimes? I'm sorry but...?"

They kind of took that in and didn't say anything.

I followed it with, "And, I guess, I don't want to seem like a bad person, it's just... it's hard to not... Notice."

Ann interrupted with a hand wave and an increasing smile. "Kevin. Stop. I've seen you stare, today. I could tell, you were trying not to, and failing. I get that. But, it's okay. As long as you are respectful and you stop if we tell you to stop, it's fine."

I nodded.

Yee added, "Okay look. Look only, is okay me. Not touch. Not, stand close. Stay. Respect."

We all nodded, and I got the idea that was settled (to my relief).

Something occurred to me. I asked, "Ann, it sounds like your deal is, I charge you money, you do some work. But, I don't charge Yee money, and she does cooking, which ... is that more work than the work you'll do? Is that fair to both of you? Are you... both okay with that?"

Ann dismissed it, "It's totally fair! I know how much work cooking is. Yee will have a daily job, 2 hours Every Single Day, times maybe 30 days a month? That's 60 hours a month, at some minimum wage, that totally pays for rent. Me, I'll have like 8 hours a week, or whatever, helping out. Plus, my rent will add cash so we can eat something. It works out."

I held out my hand, we shook, and I had roommates.

== Chapter: Moving Two ==

I stayed home.

Yee drove Ann's car back to her place and got her stuff, and Ann took the truck out again and picked up their stuff. I walked around the house and looked for where they could sleep.

I wanted the ground floor master since it was the biggest and most up to date (and, I kinda owned the house)(really!?!? Weird feeling about that). The 2nd floor bedrooms were full of super-old furniture, though. All those bathrooms were super dirty, just from not being used.

I walked into one and found the toilet tank had been turned off. I turned it on again and it worked, happily.

So, as long as the electrical didn't burn down the house, we'd be fine.

But - they didn't have a shower curtain.

I made a list of the things we'd need - towels, soap, laundry soap, food... I figured, hey, it's time to call Mr. Tamberlin.

A nice lady answered and put me right through.

Mr. Tamberlin told me there was a temporary checkbook in the papers he'd given me, but that a set of credit cards and a real checkbook would be in the mailbox soon, I'd have to look for them.

In the short term, I said, I'd need some cash, but he told me, "Just write a check payable to 'cash', and give it to people, and they'll take it like cash."

I'd never done that before, so we laughed about that. I had a bigger question, though. "How much can I spend?"

"Don't go overboard, Kevin. Get good quality things and you won't have to buy the same thing twice. Go get a good mattress. I walked through that place, you'll definitely need one, probably all the bedrooms need 'em. You can buy a TV, even a car or two, in any given month, but if you aren't really careful, you'll end up with no money and some part of the house will fall apart in a way you can't fix."

"Oh." I decided to be up front and said, "I decided a roommate might help with expenses."

"Good idea. Your household expenses don't cover buying diamonds, though."

I could hear the turn in his voice, he was making a joke about me rushing out and getting married. I laughed and didn't say what I wanted to say.

(What I wanted to say was about diamonds. That is, how One Company had an artificial world monopoly on otherwise inexpensive crystalline carbon and advertised to make it seem expensive and rare. He didn't need to hear that from me.)

Sometimes (especially when I was really young), I'd remember cool stuff and feel compelled to tell people, but then I'd figure out they really didn't care as much as I did, or everyone already knew it and was laughing at me.

Laughing at me, I'd seen lots of people do that. The constant drinking-bender embarrassment cycle with my mom? I changed the explain-cool-stuff mode into the shut-the-hell-up mode.

Still, sometimes I felt the urge and had to fight it.

I thanked him and we said goodbye.

Deciding to double-check, I went back upstairs, imagining I was going to move into the first bedroom. Immediately, I saw the bed linens, even the ones in the hall closet, were dusty beyond measure.

I got those stripped off and even the linen-cupboard ones into one of the industrial washers. The laundry soap it took was in a built-in half-full giant tub reservoir, so at least I didn't have to buy that.

Just as I was feeling good about that, I turned my head to see hinges and drawer pulls in the laundry room that needed fixing, so I figured I'd rustle up some tools to at least be able to do that much.

Visiting the shop led me to walk around and look at things. That led to adding to my to-get list (for the shop) like some organizers and bins. But, trying to figure out what kind, I just had to look at all the odds and ends piled high, on the floor, on dirty shelves, in existing bins, on shelves in cabinets and rolling-tables, etc.

Eventually, I had to come in.

Ann and Yee were back, and having tea. The kind of tea they were having... was from the special jar!!

Neither of them were talking, just staring at each other.

Oh My Fucking God.

I had to think fast. I knew the tea was medicinal, somehow, but also was a kind of religious thing?

Out of deference to Agnes and sadness at her memory, I felt a pull, a strong memory of the ritual Agnes had done with me, a compulsion to just do what ... had to be done?

As I sat down at the end of the table, they turned to look at me, blank faced.

The whole scene I'd had with Agnes started playing out in my head, really vividly and kind of in real-time.

I could hear her speaking, the words echoing clearly and loudly into my head. She'd said some things in Latin. Strangely, I could remember those words. More than that, spontaneously, those words started coming out of my mouth!

The feeling I had was, it was just the Right Thing to Do, a moment of clarity, like some kind of puzzle had come together. I didn't know why, really, but everything just made sense.

When someone drank that tea, the person there, they HAD to do the ceremony.

I've thought about this moment, sometimes, because I had some sensation that I wasn't really in control of my fate. I wondered as it was happening if I could stop myself, if I could make some part of it go a different way than it appeared in my mind?

The strange thing was, I wanted it - I was on autopilot, and my mind was working on the problem of WHY this was happening instead of trying to STOP it from happening. My mode of thinking, I realized later, was that the doing was just a given, required and assumed, but I could think all I wanted about the why of it as it was going on.

When you start tying a shoe, do you stop in the middle?

Once you start some actions, some part of the muscle memory lights up and the rest just automatically goes.

For instance, one time in high school I walked out of the locker room showers and an incredibly powerful deja vu took me over. I remembered having a dream, from some previous day, and it vividly played into both my memory and my actions, so I walked over near someone and this conversation happened next to me, all that stuff just was my dream stamping itself into reality.

With Ann and Yee, right then? The experience with Agnes WAS my experience with Ann and Yee, all mixed up together and yet lining up perfectly with What Should Be.

I heard my voice asking, "Ann, what is your full name - first, middle, and last?"

"Annabelle Clarice Davidson."

"Yee?"

"Daesoo Yee-sing Moonas"

The memory re-enactment got Much Stronger, ringing in my head and I was the observer from outside and inside both, speaking and hearing myself, "Mid-summer day, Tea of the Arsennot, Giver of Bounties, Filler of Souls. Finish your teacup, then tell me no lies."

They both drank down their tea in a series of quick gulps. I waited, feeling the relief, the happiness of something going correctly, relaxing and loving that we were in precisely The Right Place, and the calm that came was a Correct Calm, if there is such a thing.

I breathed, deep breaths, and I saw they did, too, calming even more with each one.

A long time passed, or a short one, maybe 3 minutes, maybe 10, I didn't know.

The moment passed, and I spoke again. "What are your real goals - Ann?"

Her voice was calm but bright, too, happy at being asked. She said, "To live inexpensively, to be safe from my stalking ex boyfriend, to get a degree, to get married, and to have a family."

"Yee, what are your real goals?"

"Live cheap. Get degree. Get job. Married, have family. Be happy."

The thing Agnes asked wasn't just a prediction, it was a request for a commitment. I could see that, in the logic of the words, plus... It was a metaphor, too. "Will you ever steal from me?"

They both replied in unison (freaky!), "I will never steal from you."

I knew the words were talking about the farm more than me personally.

My mouth said, "Will you bring bounty to this farm, with love?"

They repeated, more in unison this time, "I will bring bounty to this farm, with love."

Obviously, the next part came out like a benediction at the end of a church service, a river of sound, formed because rivers do that, they flow.

"Daesoo Yee-sing Moonas and Annabelle Clarice Davidson. I bind you and and enjoin you. You will bear love and bring bounty to this farm, and the life it contains and cossets. I free you from burdens of want. I charge you to use your gifts to make more of this life than you take from it. If you use your gifts wisely they shall never disappoint. If you misuse them, you shall ever feel their dig towards a more noble path."

At this point, it was like I was in a widening tunnel, sort of, about what I could do, but I had, it seemed, some measure of choice back. I could think more clearly, at least.

I inhaled, and it seemed like something was missing. I said, "Say, 'I Do Swear.'"

"I do swear."

Looking at the table, then, I saw the ornate jar of tea and suddenly was struck with worry. What would happen if they just decided to have it again? Or, they decided to put new tea into it? I had a sense of needing to safeguard the tea.

It was a jar; I could just hide it. But - that wouldn't work. They were cleaning, and they'd find it. Guaranteed, they'd find it, and I didn't want to hide it in another part of the house, since there was an incredible sense of Belonging There that just having the tea in the kitchen gave.

After I'd had the tea, really, after I woke up and since, I knew I'd been drugged. The thing was, I didn't bear ill will about it, with Agnes at least. With these two, I had no way of knowing.

It wasn't just being drugged, though. I couldn't open the freakin' door.

Her invocation didn't stop me from Wanting to go out. I kind of did. But, I also knew I couldn't, and it shaped my sense of the possible.

Still, being drugged was something women talked and worried about, I knew that much, there was too much ugliness in the world. This wasn't that, but I could still end up in jail.

They could think, hey, he drugged us and did this ritual thing; they could go to the police. Then, I'd be arrested and kicked out of school and my life would be over.

So, step one, safeguard the tea. Step two, play this off as... somehow okay? So I don't get arrested?

Once those thoughts occurred to me, the words started again, spontaneously.

"Yee and Ann. This tea is special. You will not need to drink it again. You will keep it safe. Drinking this tea is a ritual of coming to live on this farm, it's perfectly natural."

That seemed right-making as it came out, and I calmed down a little from my nervousness, even if I wasn't totally in control.

We just sat there. What happened next?

"Now, go upstairs and go to bed. Sleep until morning. From now on, we are all... perfectly comfortable here, and with each other."

That last bit was winging it, mostly me but maybe not, I'd never know. I hoped I'd done okay, at least.

They got up and went upstairs. I followed them to their rooms, worrying about them walking since they looked so groggy. They looked like I felt when I got up in the middle of the night, coping with one of mom's home-late puke-everywhere yell-then-snore benders, and all I wanted to do was sleeeeeep.

Yee split off first, so I stopped at the door to watch her, seeing and suddenly remembering I'd stripped her bedsheets to wash them.

In one long move like she'd done it before, she grabbed a thin blanket from atop the leather-strapped massive steamer trunk by the bed and dragged it over the saggy old mattress. There was another under it, and she grabbed that one to be like a top sheet.

She was faced away from me as she did this, so I was watching her unobserved, and I thought she would just get in.

She didn't.

Pulling her t-shirt over her head (!!!), she then pulled off her jogging-bra (!!!!) and put her shirt back on. I'd seen her mostly from the back, but I did get a hint of side-boob.

I was a little embarrassed, but my interest was piqued. It hadn't taken so long that I got turned on by it - that would happen in my memory later - but it was a super-sexy move.

Shucking her shoes then, she got in, still faced away from me on her side. One pull on the pillow and she was down for the count.

Her window was open and there was airflow on the medium-warm day, so I left her door open to keep the breeze going.

There was a sound from Ann's room just down the hall, so I walked over to look in. I'd promised to not go in without being invited (a farm rule, we'd decided), so I stood there and leaned forward against the jamb to watch as she came out of a bathroom where she'd just flushed and washed her hands.

She made no notice of me, only repeating what Yee had done. This time I could see her motions dragging the blanket better since she was facing me across the bed.

When she pulled off her shirt, fast, it became obvious she had much MUCH larger boobs, which was something that I suspected but was hidden by the way she wore her shirt and the type of bra she had on.

It wasn't that Yee's breasts were small - they were nice for her - but Ann's stuck out forwards toward me, a significant presence, shall we say. Both they and her nipples were pointed slightly upwards, with small pink areolas just larger than the prominent nipples themselves.

I wondered what they'd be like from close up. I was very horny, being around girls that, as I'd said, were so pretty that they were out of my league.

Of course, it happened so fast I only really appreciated what I saw as a mental replay, her beautiful chest without obstruction. I also appreciated that the motion she went through was so fast it had to be a well-practiced motion and not anything special for that moment.

As she got in, not having looked at me the whole time, she said,"Good night, Kevin. Thank you so much. I have to take a nap now, I'm so tired."

"No problem." Like Yee, I left her door open for the cross-breeze, and ducked my head in a respectful nod, walking back downstairs away from the two of them quietly.

Walking down, I had a repeat of my earlier worries. I thought, hey, dude, this isn't good! I had accidentally drugged my two female tenants! They put people away for this kind of thing!

Granted, I hadn't assaulted them or anything. They got out the tea themselves, it wasn't me. Still, that's not how the charges would read, I was sure of that. If it ever went that far. I'd know in a couple of hours, either they'd freak and yell at me, or we'd all be good.

It wasn't like I'd done anything on purpose, but how do you tell a cop that? "Sorry officer, I was enraptured by the spirit of a dead woman and a raw spirit of nature that pervaded my driveway. Sir."

The actual ritual, to me, FELT good and right and proper, SO proper, that in no way was it a worry about the actual ethics but only how they'd be perceived. Maybe it should have been that, too, but I didn't feel it, and a lot of my sense of ethics was intuitive and only really based on the Golden Rule.

Sitting at the kitchen table for a few minutes, then getting up and putting the tea things away, my brain stuck on the only real facts in evidence: They were drugged. It was my house. I was responsible for them. I owed them an obligation of some measure of devotion, to keep them safe, to ensure they weren't hurt by this.

Doctor Who had talked about this once - a 'duty of care'.

I realized that maybe the obligation and enrapturing sensation I was feeling, maybe it was the farm's, filling in my assumptions about the world. Maybe the house (the whole farm?) had a plan, and I was a part of it. Yee and Ann were part of it. If that was true, there would soon be parts I didn't know yet, but the very shell of a building, the vibrant trees and garden and fruit and barns and places for animals - all of these parts, my parts, their parts, seemed ... better together?

I fit in on this farm. I hadn't grown up on a farm, I didn't know much about farms. I WAS an engineer, and from what little I knew about farming there was a lot of fixing and making do, just like being an engineer anywhere else.

Anges had taken advantage of me, probably, almost certainly, by pulling me into this place and giving me this giant thing... No, not as an object - she'd given me an Activity. A farm wasn't a _thing_, it was a thing to _do_.

Her goal may or may not have been her idea, or her magic, or her original thought. Sure, it might have been, but I had the deep suspicion it wasn't.

Agnes was a part of this mechanism, and now I was. The mechanism's goal was to exist, not to DO anything specific. By existing, it made things happen, not selfish things for itself, but motions that were part of its design just happened because that's the way the parts moved.