PUNKS Ch. 13: It's Not Cheating

--- It's Not Really Cheating ---

Joe called Tina the morning after Jenna's plea for him to reach out. He had mixed emotions. He loved Tina. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt her. He wanted her as a close friend. Joe also knew that was hazard duty for his heart, She would be a distraction at a time when he was focusing on Jasmine, his business, and his life in California.

Again, Casey was excited when she realized it was Joe on the phone. "Thank you for calling, Joe. You're going to make someone very happy." Casey lowered her voice to a near whisper. "She hasn't been herself."

"That's was Jenna tells me."

"She leans on Jenna, they talk a lot, but when Tina began venting to me a couple of weeks ago, I knew it was bad," Casey whispered lower. "I'm her fucking hostess. What do I know?"

"Listen to your little trashy mouth." Joe laughed. "I've never heard you swear before. You're a naughty girl."

"What are you gonna do about it?"

"Connect me with T before I say something inappropriate about your dirty mouth."

It took a while for Tina to pick up. When she did, he heard the big deep breath she took, and the exhale, before saying, "Hi. Joe. It's nice that you called."

"Hi, T. I'm just checking in. I know I've been really shitty about staying in touch lately. It's nothing you did. I've been really busy and did a little business travel."

"Where did you go?"

"I drove to Phoenix for a long weekend and just got back from three days in Seattle. I'm looking for new bands and I think I just signed a good one from Arizona. How are you, T?"

"We haven't talked in a while," T said, "so I don't want to start whining about business problems and legal nightmares. I don't want to drag you down. You won't want to call again."

"How about you tell me with humor? Crack some dumb jokes about the people who are making life difficult. Laughing is better than crying. That's what a dark sense of humor is for."

"That's something you're good at, making fun of people who suck. I'm not so good."

"You start off by giving them a nickname, as I do with your husband, Mister Money Launderer, or Mister Home Foreclosure. Then you talk about how stupid they are, or rotten, whatever their problem is."

"Okay," Tina said. "I'll try." She took a moment. "Mister Ten Federal Felony Charges is so stupidly proud that he not only declined a great offer the feds gave him, he told them he's going to trial to prove their incompetence. He said that to a prosecutor's face against his attorney's advice."

"Wow, you married an arrogant moron, T. You didn't tell me that. Were you hiding this from me?"

Tina laughed, "Sadly, I'm just learning it myself."

"Arrogance and stupidity are a tragic combination that often ends poorly."

Tina laughed, which made Joe happy, except for the fact she was married to a frat boy Wall Street moron, and she knew it.

"I have this client," she continued, "Cruella DeVille, who I made the mistake of getting in a deal with. She a fucking nightmare. The woman calls me every day as if I don't have any other business but hers to manage. Her partner..." Tina struggled for a nickname, "Mister Magoo, came into my office and ripped me because I had not yet accomplished what I said would take months. We just got going a few weeks ago. Magoo is a little hot-headed Lebanese man with thick glasses. He's disgusting, no manners or grace whatsoever."

"Ya see?" Joe laughed, "You did it. You told me your woes and it wasn't depressing."

"It was kinda cathartic," Tina said cheerfully.

"I know."

Tina sighed, "This is why I need you in my life, Joe. In less than two minutes you made me feel better, and I got a laugh out of you. I miss this so much."

"Do you want my advice?"

"I don't think you're actually asking."

"Dump them all, Cruella, Magoo, and Mister I Want The Feds To Ass Fuck Me."

Tina laughed.

"You don't need to do business with shitty people, T."

"They could cause me a lot of trouble if I back out." Tina said, "They know everyone in our business."

"And I bet everyone in the business knows they're arrogant assholes. There are a dozen burned bridges behind them, all over Manhattan. People will know the truth without you even speaking it."

Tina didn't react to that advice, she thought for a moment. "It is true they have a lot of enemies, but that happens when you compete in business for decades. You collect art and enemies."

"And divorce Troy," Joe added. "Take half his money before his attorneys take it all."

"Troy has a lot of money," T added as if that was a defense of Troy?

"That was a big pension fund he raided. His lawyers know that. They want to take it before the feds do. Get your slice, T, and get out."

"I'll take your advice under consideration."

They had a nice talk, but not a long one. Joe kept his promise to Jenna and completed the mission. When she hung up Tina was in good spirits and thanked Joe for calling. He promised to keep in touch, mostly by email, and occasionally by phone.

After that first call, Joe figured if he was going to do this, he was going to have fun. He slipped right back into playing his teasing game. They exchanged a few emails, then Joe had some welcome news.

-- May 6, 1994, 8:22 PM PST

Hey, I only have time for a quickie tonight. I'm heading out to Redondo Beach to see one of our new bands. I wanted to give you a heads-up that I'm flying east in two weeks to sit in on a recording session. I'll have a fairly open schedule since I'm not the engineer. I'll be in town the weekend of the 21st.

Looking forward to seeing you.

Love, J

-- May 7, 1994, 6:38 AM EST

I'm glad to hear you're coming out. It's been so long. Weekends are hard, but I'll do my best to make time for us. Will you be here on that Friday or Monday?

I know you don't care, but I just learned my husband put me in legal jeopardy with our taxes. It seems his financial scheme included tax fraud. This is separate from his other case. Troy prepared our personal taxes. I handled my business taxes. I never see our returns. He handles it all, and now my name has been dragged into his mess because we file jointly. I'm so mad. I lost my cool the other night and said some things I've been keeping inside. He's so fucking greedy.

So, did you hook up with your friend in Redondo?

Love, T

-- May 7, 1994, 7:01 AM PST

Sorry to hear your name has been sullied by Mr. Hostile Takeover. I suspect your business taxes are squeaky clean. That will likely help your case, but not his.

Yes, I hung out with Miss Redondo Beach 1990 after the show. She's in my bed right now, recovering from a long, hard night.

Love, J

-- May 7, 1994, 10:44 PM EST

Are you serious? Is she really in your bed? She's what, ten years younger than you?

T

Joe didn't reply. He was surprised she remembered his tale of Miss Redondo Beach. When she mentioned 'his friend in Redondo', Joe gave her an answer he knew would get a reaction and possibly make her jealous. This was Joe's game.

-- May 16, 1994, 9:40 PM PST

Good morning, beautiful.

I had Laura change my flight to the red eye so I would arrive early and have open time on Friday. I just don't know what state I'll be in. The band arrives late in the afternoon. I'll have to be at the studio to greet them.

Laura grilled me about why I wanted a flight change. She asked what I was doing that day. I think she knows.

Call me at lunch so we can talk.

Love, J

*****

Jasmine had previously mentioned a Memorial Day weekend barbeque at her parent's house and how awkward it might be for Joe. Janice and PJ would be there, as well as the rest of The Black Pack. Everyone was aware of the gossip drama that ended the friendship between Joe and the Joneses. Joe hadn't spoken to PJ since Asia, nearly seven months.

She joined Joe on a rare weeknight because he was flying to New York for the weekend. Joe ordered Chinese take-out so they could spend less time cooking and more time fucking. Lying in bed after the fact, Jasmine reminded Joe of the barbeque.

"So, I won't be staying over next weekend," she explained. "I promised my Mom I'd help her cook on Saturday. Then I'm spending the night to help set up on Sunday."

"That's fine."

"Are you okay? When I mentioned it last week you seemed to ignore me."

"I didn't ignore you, Jas. I just didn't have anything to say. I agree with you. It could be uncomfortable for me to hang with your friends. I'm not saying it would be, but it could go south if Janice runs her mouth."

"And Janice always runs her mouth," Jasmine added.

"Yeah, she does." Joe paused because he had something else on his mind. "I have a question, I've met your parents, they know me well enough, but they have no clue you and I are dating, do they?"

"No, they don't."

"So I can't hang with your friends, even though I'm cool with everyone but Janice. Your parents have no clue we're together. It seems like I'm not actually in your life. We have our thing that's completely separate from your world. I've never even met a coworker."

One thing Jas adored about Joe was his directness. Even when he was full of shit Jas knew he was at least being honest. He had just stated facts that were not news to Jasmine, but she wasn't ready to address them. She sat uncomfortably for a moment with Joe staring at her.

"You know all my people," Joe continued, "and they love you. Most of them think we're a serious couple. It's strange to know you keep me separate from your people."

Jasmine had no answer to this, except an uncomfortable truth. After another awkward silence, she had no choice but to break some unfortunate news to him.

"There's something you need to know. I wanted to invite you, to tell Mom I had a guest, but after thinking about it I decided against it. My concern about Janice is real, but there is another thing."

"What is it?"

Jasmine pulled Joe closer, "My mom has a problem, her problem, not mine, with white men dating black women."

"Oh, really?" Joe leaned back in surprise. "That's not good."

"She had a bad experience as a young woman and she knows of others. She thinks white men objectify and sexualize black women."

Joe held back his scoff... "To be fair, all kinds of men objectify and sexualize all kinds of women."

"I'm not arguing," Jas raised a hand in acknowledgment, "but it's especially true of minority women, Asian women, and Hispanic. I'm not getting on a soap box. I know how the world works. I'm just telling you my Mom might be a challenge for us."

"Okay, I've been warned," Joe said, "it's not good news but you know I'm cool with your dad. He and I had a nice talk at the birthday barbeque a few summers ago. He joined you in breaking my balls about the Celtics."

"My dad likes you," Jas said, " and he respects what you've accomplished for yourself."

"I met your mom, but that gang of Brentwood mothers is a little scary. I just said hello when we were introduced and then got fuck out of there."

Jasmine laughed, "They are scary, and Mom is well aware of you. She has a problem with musicians too."

"Oh, fuck me. I already have two strikes against me?" Joe thought for a moment, "Wait, your dad's a musician!"

"Yeah, and so are most of his friends. That's why Mom knows you so well." Jasmine looked Joe in the eyes. "And you have three strikes, Celtics boy."

In the days leading up to his flight east, Joe pondered the state of their relationship. They were great together. He felt he had many reasons to feel good about himself and Jasmine. Every weekend they spent together was fabulous. They had fun and the sex was mind-blowing. There were times she was so affectionate Joe felt she was in love with him, or maybe she was on that path.

Joe had decided months ago that he'd defer to her. He let Jasmine set the terms and he would accept them without complaint. He was mostly okay with her terms. All she wanted was his weekends. Joe looked at the bright side, he always knew their schedule. From Friday at 6 PM until Monday at 6 AM, he had Jasmine. Was it enough to make him happy? Maybe not, but it was enough to keep him satisfied and hopeful.

There was also the issue of Jas seeing other men. It wasn't actually an issue, but Joe saw that as a sign she was not close to changing her mind. The news that her mother was an obstacle was just another challenge Joe would have to overcome to get Jasmine.

He laughed to himself thinking how Jas always says she loves that their relationship was uncomplicated when nothing could be further from the truth. They simply did well not to let the complications become problems. Jas didn't even ask him if he was planning to see Tina on his trip. That's how easy she wanted to make things - don't ask, don't tell.

*****

Tina was eager to see Joe. She hadn't laid eyes on him in more than seven months, and his last visit didn't end well. The difficulties they had weighed on her. She was afraid they were losing something they always had, trust. It started with the happy hour blow-up, then they had three fights over 1984. Tina felt Joe no longer trusted her, and it broke her heart. She called Joe the day before his flight

"What time do you have to meet your clients?"

"Their flight arrives at 2:45. I'll be at the shop around four."

"That won't leave us any time for The Cairo."

"I'm doing what I can, T. I told you Monday was the best day for us. You didn't want to wait that long - but you can't get away on the weekend. I changed my flight out for you."

"I know, I'm sorry. I haven't seen you in months and was hoping we'd have some quality time."

"It's not hard to figure out what you want from me. You want intimacy without guilt. What does that tell you, T?"

Tina didn't reply.

"Do you get this special attention from Mr. Insider Trading?"

"No," she said. "He's not like that."

"I'm looking forward to seeing you, and I'll be happy to give you what you need. It's not difficult. I like doing that for you."

"Are you not getting what you need?"

"You know the answer to that. I haven't seen you in months. When I do see you I take what you're willing to give and I accept whatever that is. I can get what I need elsewhere."

"You never answered my question. Was Miss Redondo Beach really in your bed that morning?"

"You don't want to go there, T. We're not married. I don't have to answer or justify my behavior. And I don't want you telling the girls at happy hour about me and Miss Redondo."

"That's cold, Joe."

"Facts are like that."

"So I'll take that as a yes, you fucked her that night."

"Believe what you want to believe. Look, I gotta go. I'll call your machine tomorrow morning from JFK and give you an update."

There was no Miss Redondo Beach in his bed. Joe was just messing with Tina. He was kinda being a jerk about it, but that was how he dealt with her prying into his love life. There was a Miss Redondo Beach in his bed at one time, but that was a long while back.

In the middle of the night, flying high above the heartland on board his LAX-JFK flight, Joe was uncomfortably awake. He always slept on planes and joked that it was his superpower. It was why he loved taking the redeye, "You don't lose a valuable business day to travel." On this flight, his mind would not rest.

After avoiding Tina for months, and working hard to move on with his life, he was a little surprised by how excited he was to be going to New York and to be seeing her. He had changed a flight to accommodate T's schedule. He felt an odd sense of comfort, that he was free to do whatever he wanted in New York; because that was the state of his relationship with Jasmine. Maybe that's not a bad thing, he thought.

-- NEW YORK --

When he arrived at JFK on the redeye, Joe walked off the jetway and began looking for a pay phone to call Tina's office. Instead, he had a surprise waiting as he walked toward the concourse.

"Hey, baby. How was your flight?"

"What are you doing here, at this hour?"

"I decided to be your chauffeur into the city," Tina smiled and put her arms around him.

"Chauffeur to where." He hugged her with his free arm.

"You can come to the gallery. If you want, you can take a snooze on my office sofa. I'll be down in the studio working with Casey from six to ten."

"This is nice, the last thing I expected."

"It used to be my thing, meeting you at the airport, remember?"

"How could I forget? You showed up everywhere; the train station, or bus station, or wherever I arrived from the road," Joe smiled. "Coming home was one of the best things about being with you."

They followed the herd of groggy redeye passengers through the terminal towards baggage claim. Tina held his free hand. Joe looked over at her. Tina smiled at him. She was so happy. He liked that.

"I always met you at the station because I wanted to see you as soon as I could. That's what happened last night. I decided to seize my first opportunity."

"Well," Joe said, giving T a one-armed hug, "an airport run is no small favor. Thank you."

On the drive into the city, they chatted lightly, about things that wouldn't lead down dark paths. Tina's tailgating and constant lane changing made it an anxious commute for Joe. Tina noticed and thought it was funny.

"Am I making you nervous?"

"You drive like a fucking..."

"New Yorker?"

"Yeah, an asshole."

"It's not like you didn't know this about me already."

"Yeah," Joe said, "that's why I never ask you to pick me up at the airport. You're a menace."

When they arrived at the gallery, Tina set him up on her loveseat sofa with a blanket, kissed him like a mother tucking in her child, and shut the lights off. A few hours later, she tiptoed into the office to change from her studio work clothes to her dress and heels. Joe woke up as she slipped out of her jeans in the shadows.

"Hey, what time is it?"

"Good morning, baby. It's 9:45. Did you sleep?"

"Yes, pretty good actually."

She pulled her T-shirt over her head. "Do you mind if Jenna and Casey have lunch with us today?" Tina opened her office blinds letting the day shine in.

"No, that's fine."

"You and I have Monday, right?" She stood in her bra and panties, dress in hand, without a thought that Joe was in the room.

"Yes, I promised you that day was yours."

"Lunch and the afternoon?" She pulled the dress over her head and began to shimmy to slip it down over her figure. Joe watched her. She smiled at him, happy he was watching.

"I'm all yours," he said.

"Good. I'll tell the girls they can join us for lunch today. They've asked me in the past, but I wanted you for myself."

Joe was fine having Jenna and Casey for lunch. He loved her gallery crew. They were cute and good sports when it came to his games. He wasn't expecting lunch to go as it did.

Three women gang teased Joe for nearly two hours over pizza and beer at Caprese, an Italian restaurant not far from the gallery. Tina told her girls embarrassing stories from their past. They tag-teamed Joe, trying to make him blush with flirty jokes and innuendos. A few times they succeeded, but mostly he enjoyed the attention.

He gave it back, flirting with Tina's proteges. Near the end, he showed Jenna and Casey he wasn't about to be beaten at his own game. When Casey made a lewd comment about men's private parts, he saw an opening.

"Has T told you anything about me, below the equator?" He met her eyes.

Casey glanced at Tina, mildly panicked.

"Ohhhh, she did, didn't she?" Joe smiled like the evil Grinch. "What did she say about my junk?"

Tina tried to rescue Casey. "I may have mentioned a few..."

"Oh no," he interrupted. "I want to hear it from her. What did T tell you about me?"

Casey sat quietly for a moment, then decided to just say it. "She said you have a big dick, thick and long." Then she blushed a little.