PUNKS Ch. 36: Three Amigos

November 1996

-- The Three Amigos --

When Joe joined Tina for her return to New York, he hated leaving Venice behind, especially because he didn't know how long he'd be gone. He found his groove in The East Village after he discovered his people in the shops he patronized. Joe focused on what he liked about living in the city rather than dwelling on his missing California. He enjoyed the walking and subway life but he missed his runs along the beach. He loved that Katz delicatessen was a short walk away, but hated that he was going to gain weight living in New York. He was cool with taking the subway to Chelsea and working part-time at Guerilla Records. Having coworkers was new to Joe, and he had fun getting to know the young guerillas. They liked it too. He was also happy the three amigos were back together.

Tina, Joe, and Jenna were a team again. Jen came over for dinner at least once a week, and there were happy hours at The Cairo, Davidoffs, and The Starlight. Tamara joined them on one occasion. On days off, Tina dragged Joe to every museum in Manhattan and Brooklyn. Jenna often joined them, and Joe loved it.

While T was dealing with Troy, playing her ace and forcing him to make a deal, Joe, T, and Jen were trying to manage this new reality. The couple had plenty of alone time at home, so, when they went out they often invited Jenna. When they first arrived in the city Jen happily accepted their invitations, depending on what the activity was. A movie or happy hour was always a yes. An offer to dine at a nice restaurant might be declined. As weeks went by, Joe noticed Jen was accepting fewer invites. He knew why. She felt like the third wheel.

During a happy hour at the Alphabet Club, a neighborhood bar Joe found close to Tompkins Park, he gave Jenna a hard time for not joining them two nights before.

"If we invite you we've already discussed it. We want you to come."

"It's okay," Jenna said. "I don't need to do everything with you guys."

"And you don't. Last week we went to that new Italian place everyone is raving about, Sardinia. We wanted alone time, so we didn't call."

Tina put her hand on Jenna's. "You have to trust that we know what we want, and we want you to be with us. Doesn't this feel like the old days on Jones Street? I'm loving it."

"Me too," Joe said.

Jenna didn't reply, but the answer was yes. It did feel like the old days, which wasn't all good for Jenna. She was delighted her best friends were back together, but Jenna's story does not have a happy ending. Her friendship with Joe had become complicated. She had a crush on him in the eighties. After their recent time together, that crush had turned to love. It was not always easy being with them. Joe sensed her discomfort and was very careful to be sensitive to that, as was Tina.

Tina more than anyone understood Jenna's dilemma. Not long ago, she was the odd girl out. When Joe was sleeping with Jenna he was using his platonic rulebook with Tina, and it drove her mad. T knew precisely how Jenna felt. Back home from happy hour, after a toss in the sheets. Tina brought it up.

"What are we going to do about Jen?"

"What do you mean? There's nothing we can do."

"That's what's bothering me. I can't think of anything. I feel she's avoiding us and I hate that."

"She's not avoiding us." Joe pulled Tina closer. "We went to the movies last week, the art & craps show the week before that. How many times has she been here for dinner? We have at least one happy hour a week. I think Jen is adjusting to this new life and deciding how much of us is right for her."

"I'm sorry, it feels like she's distant even when she's with us."

"That I understand. She does seem disconnected at times. I don't think she's enjoying us being together as much as she thought she'd be."

"She's not happy being with us."

"I think the right word is bittersweet."

A small challenge Joe faced was not slipping up and revealing the conspiracy to end Tina's marriage. There's no telling how she'd react. Joe and Jen didn't have to vow they'd never tell. It was simply implied. There were a half dozen occasions when Joe was talking to T, just rambling on, and realized he slipped. Each time he caught himself and Tina was none the wiser. He told Jenna over the phone about a close call.

"Tina was confessing how much she resented my platonic rules and said she was determined to break me. I said something about you and Plan B. She looked at me, confused, and I had to make up some bullshit saying the platonic thing was my Plan B because fucking her didn't win her back."

"It kinda was," Jen said. "You weren't lying."

"Plan B was more than that, it was a conspiracy to psychologically torture her. Then T says, 'What does Jen have to do with it? And I said Plan B gave me a free pass to sleep with you."

"Again," Jen said, "Not a lie. Not fucking her was always the most important weapon."

"You were nice enough to hold my hand through that."

"Do you really believe Tina would lose her shit if we told her everything?"

"Would you like to be the messenger?"

"Fuck no."

"That settles it." Joe exhaled. "We're never confessing."

"Until you slip up."

"Look, Jen, we're worried about you. I know it hurts to be around us. I feel it too, Jen. My feelings for you have not changed."

"I know. That's what's so hard, knowing we want the same thing but you want the other thing more. That hurts."

"Just don't disconnect from us over this. T and I are keenly aware of your feelings and how difficult this is. You're happy and unhappy in the same breath. We're trying our best to be sensitive to that."

"Like the way no you guys don't show affection around me? That's just dumb, Joe."

"We always show affection."

"Not as much near me. Trust me, I notice." Jen sighed. "You realize T doesn't want us to be alone, right?"

"Do you think she doesn't trust us?"

"Two weeks ago you called happy hour. I was in. Tina realized she had an appointment. First, she said, 'You guys go.' Then two days later she changed her appointment to make that happy hour."

"Yeah. I noticed."

"She does not trust us alone."

"I have a question that's been bugging me," Joe said. Since the amigos reunited he'd wanted to ask Jenna a question. He came close a few times but balked.

"What's that?"

"Did you ever think of what would happen if Tina never left Troy?"

"That was never going to happen," Jen said quietly. "She was ready to go before we started plotting the demise of her marriage."

"Did you ever think of what could have been for us?"

"Yes, Joe. I did. I allowed myself to imagine a future with you. Then I sobered up."

"You know I respect your level-headed pragmatism. But you're so consistently sensible and logical I sometimes wonder if that's a mask you wear to cover what you're really feeling."

"What does that mean? A mask?"

"You once said I could win the Oscar for the best clown in a romantic tragedy for my way of acting all happy and friendly when I'm actually deeply unhappy. I think you could win the best emotional rock in a tragic romance. You are strong, Jen. I admire you, but I wonder if it's real."

"I just told you it hurts to be so close to you. Anyone who has loved knows loss. How we deal with it defines us. I'll never fall to pieces, but I have my bad moments."

"I have those moments too," Joe said. "Walking home from the movies last week, you made me laugh a couple of times and wanted to kiss you so bad. It hurts when I feel that."

"That's why Tina doesn't trust us. A small moment like that, when we're alone, might end up in a kiss."

"You're the best of us, me, you, and T. You realize that, don't you?"

"I slept with the man my best friend is in love with. Hold off on the sainthood."

-- Brrrrrrr --

At the start of the holiday season, after nearly two months in New York, the cold weather rolled in. Joe was feeling homesick for sunny California. He felt he needed to get back into his own studio. Winter was coming and he had no intention of spending it in Manhattan.

Tina was not pleased. She was hurt and a bit dramatic.

Joe argued, "You don't need a bodyguard. The divorce is moving forward. You're in the middle of this gallery transition with the buyers ready to take over. Everything is under control here. I want to go home."

"I remember you said your home is wherever I am. What happened to that sentiment?"

"Thirty-seven degrees with rain and blustery winds will do that to me. I hate winter, T. You know that."

"How can you not be here for Christmas?"

"You should try Christmas at the beach. You'll get it."

"My mom would have a stroke if I wasn't home for Christmas, and I guarantee she and Dad are really happy you're with me and not that other guy."

"What's his name again," Joe pulled Tina in for a makeup hug. "Tony, or Ted... is it Timmy?"

Tina laughed. "It's Trent. I'm pretty sure."

Joe agreed to stay another month and go back after the holidays... under one condition.

"You're coming to Providence to spend time with my family. Just like in the old days, T. Your Mom is the queen of Christmas Eve, everyone comes to your house. We'll do the eve in Brooklyn."

"Then we'll drive to Rhode Island afterward?" Tina winced. "That was not an easy drive at midnight after Mom's party."

"No. My sisters were little back then. I wanted to be in the house when they woke up for Santa."

Tina laughed. "Joe, you were Santa to them. Christmas started when we tried to sneak into the house and one of the girls woke up. Then all hell broke loose at four in the morning."

Joe smiled, "It was Jeanie. I swear she was awake all night waiting for us."

Tina's face turned earnest. "This is going to be hard. Your sisters hate me."

"I've already told you, they don't hate you, T. They're just angry that you drove their big brother away because he couldn't live on the same coast as you."

"Oh," Tina's hands went to her hips. "Is that what they think?"

Joe smiled. "Kinda, but they didn't hear that from me. I made it clear to them that there was no villain. I fucked up and we ended."

"Then where did they get this I drove you away narrative."

"That's Jackie's interpretation. And if Jackie says so, Julie and Jeanie fall in line."

"So the kingpin hates me? Great. Jackie's the toughest one."

"By a mile. I'm even afraid of Jackie."

"No, you're not. She adores you." Tina put her head on Joe's shoulder. "This will be very hard for me, facing your family. I need you to help, not tease me about it, not in front of them."

"I will be there, standing by your side, telling everyone how happy I am. They will see how happy I am. It's that obvious. All you need to do is show them how happy you are."

"I can do that," she squeezed him.

"And grovel at the kingpin's feet confessing your sins."

"You're such a jerk."

Joe leaned back, holding Tina at arm's length. "You think I'm joking? No, I'm not. Jackie will respond to you admitting you fucked up. Just like I told her my sins. I told her long ago that I fucked up, and I'm sorry. If you say you fucked up too, and you're sorry, they'll see we're not pointing fingers and accept that we've fixed ourselves. If you win Jackie over and the whole family falls in line."

"Your Mom is not an easy woman."

"Jackie is the queen of my family. Mom will be happy when Jackie forgives and likes you. Plus you're a hardcore Catholic. You are the last great hope to save her son's soul. You'll tell my Mom in a private conversation that you're trying to get me back in church. She will love you just for trying."

Tina smiled, "You are such a conniving, manipulative shit. That angle is genius."

"It takes one to know one."

"What about your dad? He's quiet like you can be at times. I never know what he's thinking."

"He's the easiest of the pack. Dad adored you. He sees what I see in you. After we split and I got home from the Euro tour I spent two weeks at home. Dad and I talked late into the night, a few times. It hurt him to see me heartbroken."

Joe pulled Tina back in for an embrace. "He told me I have to move on and find my life. He said it wasn't in New York... after I told him this city held too much pain for me. He said it wasn't in Providence because I'd seen too much of the world to go backwards. Dad told me to go find my life, but I should circle back to you because you never know..."

"Your dad said those words?"

"He did."

"So we could blame him for you running away?"

"Oh, go ahead, try that one," Joe laughed. "The sisters would fucking crucify you."

After Christmas Eve in Brooklyn and a mildly stressful four days in Providence rehabilitating her reputation with Joe's family, they returned to the East Village. Joe was ready to go home to California. Tina then insisted he stay through his birthday, January 7th. He reluctantly conceded another week. This bi-coastal thing may not be so easy after all.

-- A Diamond With Peridots --

"I hate New Year's Eve," Joe said. "Can't we just stay in?"

"What's your problem with New Years?"

"For one thing, it's amateur hour for drinkers, just like St. Patrick's Day and Cinco de Mayo. Everyone's out to get their drink on but they can't handle their liquor. It's stupidity on parade."

"Jesus, Joe. You sound like an old man."

"T, temps will be in the teens that night."

Joe pressed Tina to stay home by being a whiny little bitch for two days, rejecting any ideas she had to party at midnight. They compromised. Tina made dinner reservations at a new midtown sushi restaurant but agreed to be home early.

It was 13' as revealers waited for the stupid ball to drop in stupid Times Square, an event they did once and Joe vowed to never do again, he was sitting against the headboard, pillows propped up, catching his breath after a year-ending carnal workout. He had just pounded Tina's pussy from behind. She was in the bathroom, cleaning up after a lot of cum had run down her leg, making a mess of her bedsheets. When she returned, he patted the bed.

"Come sit. I need to talk about something."

"Sure, offer me the wet side."

He smiled. "It didn't ooze out of my pussy."

"It's your cum, and in case you didn't realize it, this is your pussy."

"Do you want to change the sheets?"

"No. I'll get a towel to sit on." Tina went into the bathroom. "We can change them tomorrow."

"If we change the sheets every time we get cum on them we'll need more linens."

"I like cum, baby, but I don't like sitting in it."

"It dries."

Tina spread a bath towel over the wetness created by globs of jizz. "I don't like crusty bed sheets either." She sat on the bed, propped her pillow up, and snuggled beside Joe.

"I have a story to tell you," he said. "I was waiting for this night."

"Why this night?"

"You'll see." Joe exhaled. "It won't be an entirely fun story, because it takes place in 1984, but the ending is good."

"It can't be worse than how that year actually ended."

"No, but this story will make you think back to what might have been. You could get upset with me."

Tina looked up with concern, "What's going on? You're worrying me."

He kissed her forehead. "Don't be scared little girl. My story has a happy ending."

She nestled her head against his chest and shoulder. "I love you. I'm so happy here in Cali, with you."

"Did you just say, Cali? Ugh. Don't do that?"

"What?"

"Nevermind." Joe pulled her close. "So, I was thinking about jewelry the other day. I want you to have an engagement ring."

"You haven't asked me to marry you yet."

"I need the ring first, right? Isn't that how you ladies like it? The question popping and the bling come on the same day, right?"

"I don't need a ring, but I won't turn one down."

"I was thinking about what kind of ring to buy you. I know you don't always go for traditional jewelry. You like to be unique."

"And engagement rings are all the same, and boring," Tina said, a line she's used before. "more or less, with variations on size and price. When you see one it's obviously an engagement ring."

"That's what I mean." Joe made eye contact with T and held it. "You hate the obvious."

"Obvious is tacky," she said quietly, defending her mild snobbery.

'Back to my story," Joe fluffed his pillow and took a sip of whiskey from his bedside crystal glass, crafted for him by an artisan in Dublin, one of a kind. It was Kentucky bourbon in the crystal. Joe took a deep breath.

"Just before Christmas of '83, you and I went shopping together. We spent an entire day, starting with breakfast at The Parkside, shopping at Macy's, and FAO for my sister's gifts, Then we had a great dinner at some place I can't remember, and then..."

"Grigio."

"What?"

"Grigio was the place we had dinner," Tina said, leaning in. "It was one of the best dates we ever had. Oh my God." Tina took a breath. "I love that you remember that day." Tina squeezed him. "It was one of our best."

"Because we were shopping."

Joe looked at T, the News Year's Rockin' Eve countdown happening as they snuggled in bed with Dick Clark, three pounds of hairspray, Weird Al Yankovic, and KISS.

"I hate New Year's Eve because this is the night I lost you."

Tina scrunched her nose, thinking back to New Year's with Joe. "That was our last Christmas together." she exhaled. "I remember that day, Joe. We were so happy. Never in a million years would I believe that was our last Christmas."

"I know. I think about that day a lot. Do you remember we looked at jewelry because I wanted to buy you a nice gift?"

"Yes, and we saw that diamond with a ring of my birthstones clustered around it. It was beautiful and unique."

Joe held his chin. "It was silver with ten tiny peridots... and a clear as-sky diamond in the middle."

"You remember the ring?" Tina nudged him.

"Yeah. I wanted to buy it but you would not allow it."

"Because I looked at the price tag. It was way too expensive for your budget. You were twenty-two."

"Weeks from my twenty-third birthday."

"Still too expensive."

"It was, but you fell in love with that ring."

"I did, and I went back after the holidays and it was gone. Some guy bought it for his wife or stupid girlfriend."

"I remember. You told me. And you were disappointed even though the ring was too expensive."

"I just hated that it was gone."

Joe reached under his pillow and pulled out a box, an obvious ring box, dark gray felt with a gold S on the cover. He handed it to T. "Is this close enough?"

Tina sat up straight, box in hand, and looked at Joe. She smiled, "You bought me a ring? What's the occasion?"

"I'm trying to right a wrong turn in my life."

Tina opened the box. She gasped. "Oh my god! This is just like it. That was years ago, but I remember that ring. Where did you get this? Did you have this custom-made?"

"Just try it on."

Joe pulled the ring from the cardboard and felt holder. Tina put her hand out. He slipped the ring on her finger. She held her hand out as women do, admiring her ring.

"I know this is not traditional," Joe said. "but this ring is special. Will you marry me?"

Tina looked up, speechless. Her eyes went from dry to moist in a few seconds. "Yes. Of course, I'll marry you."

She hugged him, kissed him, and looked at her ring again, wiping a few tears away. "I love you so much. Thank you. Where did you get this? You had to have it made from memory."

"Pull the holder out of the box."

Tina pinched the ring holder and pulled. Under the felt was a tightly folded piece of paper. She removed and unfolded it.

"Simon's Jewelers? That was the store..."

"Look at the date."

Tina gasped, "Oh. My. God." She looked at Joe. "You bought this in eighty-three?"

"Yes."

"This is the ring? Why didn't you give it to me?"

"That's the story I have to tell. It's not a good one, T."