Puzzle 01

Puzzle 01

"I mean, can I buy you an ice cream or something?"

"Oh, well, I mean, um, no, yes, no and maybe, so?"

"Oh, um, answers like that make me think that you work for the government, so?"

"Um, no because I don't know you yet and yes because it's nice to be asked and no because I finally have my weight and shape where I want it and ice cream is the devil and finally, maybe because we haven't yet discussed that I'm a guy and I already had one swollen cheek once, so?"

"Well, I'm David, so can I buy you a soft yogurt for your health and then hate fuck you?"

Jeez, that David guy, right? The nerve of him asking me to share an ice cream with him, right?

Anyways, hey there, they call me Puzzle, but not because I'm hard to figure out. They call me Puzzle because I'm impossible to figure out, LOL. Not really. They call me Puzzle because back in the day, I mean, I picked up puzzles more than I picked up a game controller and that suited me just fine. And that suited my family too, although, wow, it left me on the outside looking in from my friends a little bit. But no generation is 100% this or that, so video gaming wasn't on the top of my list.

But I'm not saying that I was shunned either, so some of my "outside looking in" was from my side. I mean, for one, it's a little boring hanging out with your gamer buddies when you just don't play and for two, whoa, sometimes I would use my time with the guys and um, cater to them and I didn't want to become the designated "servant" girl, so I held back plenty and watched from the outside. I mean, guys are creatures of habit, so once you start retrieving the snacks and beverages, I mean, it quickly becomes your job, right?

But I like my friends, so I chip in once in a while. Oh, and to be clear, it's never gone any further than normal creatures of habit involvement, meaning no sex stuff, ugh, no kissing, which I need practice at and nothing more than the flirty hand offs of a soda or a bowl of pretzels.

Also, ooh, you may not like this, but my hair is basically white. I like it and nobody has ever said to my face that they wouldn't buy me an ice cream because of my hair, but I know that can be a bit much for some, so that's on you, but I will respect your likes and opinions.

I'll also have one of those soft yogurt parfaits, so. With Raspberry pieces, please.

Anyways, I think I would be a decent partner, but David above was a hint. Getting me into a "hate fuck" situation might be your best bet at first and I'm too puzzled about that stuff to say anything else, except for maybe to not give up me so quickly. And my last hint is that if I can role play a girl, so to say, then I can role play someone putting up a fight.

Also, I mean, come on, look at me and my size! I'll lose every single wrestling match!

But enough about how I think about sex, but may never act upon those thoughts.

I hang out on the Strip in Middleton and my spot is in front of the Odd Gifts Shop, which is half way in between the Lava Java Coffee Shop and the Red Bag outlet store. Which is also right near one of the narrow alley walkways in between buildings, which is a great place to practice kissing. FYI.

"Hey, Puzzle, I ordered something for you through my store's system and it arrived today, so grab me a triple quad from the Lava Java Coffee Shop and visit me for a minute, okay?"

Well, I don't buy a lot from the Red Bag store, but Darlene has a guy eye for undies that suit me, so.

"Gianna, Darlene would like a triple quad, so?"

"Puzzle, and I want to know what all the fuss is about with three is enough, so?"

And that's why I support being referred to as Puzzle. Some of the people in Middleton just puzzle me sometimes.

[Squirt, fizz, grr, steam, squirt, flying liquid drops, grr, steam, clunk, clunk]

[Cup plops down] well, Puzzle? Are you ready for some lips smacking lessons from a real woman then, hmm?"

"I'll be back, Gianna, so?"

Well, Gianna is quite the real woman and all and one should always keep their options open, so.

"(Sip) dressing room #2, Puzzle and stop with the puzzled look on your face! They are just some undies that I found in our system, so, get after it then (sip)."

Well, you see, folks, there are undies and then there is plastic food wrap in a few different translucent colors. I mean, they were cool as hell and apparently, there was little chance of anyone ever seeing me in such sheer and transparent undies, so why not, right?

[Knock, knock]

"I assume you found the color coordinated fishnet pantyhose too then, Puzzle?"

"Well, since you carefully laid out everything together, Darlene, duh."

"Well, you need help sometimes, Puzzle. I mean, quite frankly, some of your fashion choices just puzzle me, so, um, I know that pink isn't your color, but they are just so sheer that, um, well, all I've ever heard is that "three" is too cute to ignore, so, selfie material, right Puzzle?"

I mean, sometimes it's just best to not respond to everything, right? But oh boy, Darlene was right about the sheer pink undies!

"So, I never saw you wear a super short skirt, Puzzle, so, I mean, should I pass anything else into the dressing room then, hmm?"

"Um, no, Darlene, I like my shorts, so."

"Yeah, but Puzzle, I'm puzzled again. I know about your favorite comic strip, so?"

"Darlene, stop hacking my phone! Anime can create anything, so?"

[Dressing door cracks open and a new pair of shorts appears]

I mean, sure, I like Gwen the Tranny food delivery driver, but that's just from the creative mind of an artist and has nothing to do with real life, so.

"Well, I think the blue fishnets and sheer blue undies would make for a great way for you to visit your gamer buddies, so?"

"Oh, and like with a trench rain coat on too?"

"I mean, I'm betting that they will like it and I'm betting that they don't have it in them to do anything outrageous, so?"

Oh, oh, Darlene sounded more puzzled with that statement than reassuring, so.

"And I'm daring you to wear it out of the store tonight and to stay on the Strip for at least one hour, Puzzle, so?"

Hah! There was no way that I was falling for that!

"Ahh, no way, Darlene! But I'll wear the deep red fishnets out of the store tonight, so?"

Well, they were darker and I didn't want anyone to get puzzled and confuse me for a Strip alley worker, so. I mean, with the maroon Denim shorts and all, it was a nice match and the sheer red undies were the least transparent, so.

[Dressing room door creaks open]

"Huh? Say "hey" to Toby for me, Puzzle."

"Who said I would be stopping to talk with Toby then, Darlene, hmm?"

"Well, that outfit for one, Puzzle!"

Well, the Red Bag Outlet store comes with instructions, so.

"And Puzzle, Toby's cock goes here [pokes finger into mouth] and then there is this in and out motion [performs back and forth action with finger] and then Toby's cock goes boom [makes blown up motion with fingers] and then you go gulp, gulp, gulp, right here [circles throat with finger] and then you had your first boyfriend [pats belly], so?"

Huh, instructions with very little puzzlement to them then.

"(Gulp) I mean, ooh, well, I mean, Darlene, well, if I happen upon Toby, I mean, whatever, so."

Oh, and the Red Bag Outlet always sees it's customers to the door and out of the door with a nice butt pat! Or seven.

"It's okay, Puzzle, I know you won't follow through, but get up in there a little bit. I mean, another thing never comes if there isn't one thing to get the ball rolling and you look very flirtable, so, get up in there and test the waters!"

And for my last oh, oh, I guess the Red Bag Outlet store also comes with philosophy advice too! But her words that I looked flirtable didn't puzzle me. I liked that part. And maybe I liked her demo on how a blow job works, but you would have too if the roles were reversed and it was you standing there panting in black high tops, so.

Also, huh, I think maroon was my new color. At least my new color for hanging out on the Strip.

Ugh, but at glance in mirror before I was butt patted out of the store, I mean, ugh, I think I needed a red streak or four in my white hair, but that's for another day, I guess.

"Oh, hey Toby, hey guys."

"Puzzle! Ooh, Puzzle, you got a new look then."

"Hush, Toby."

"No, no, Puzzle, I like it. I mean, tee he, we like it, right guys?"

[Frank] "(Fag much Toby?) Yeah, that's a nice color on you, Puzzle. You should come around tomorrow evening, so."

[Gene] "(Shoot.) Well, you were voted the most capable of change, Puzzle, but yeah, you should come around soon."

[Hank] "(Aha, aha, aha) Whatever, but we do miss your catering skills, Puzzle, so."

"LOL, guys, it felt like you were being spoiled with my catering, so. Anyways, Toby, a guy has been bothering with me tonight about fattening ice cream, so, I mean, can I get an escort to my truck then, hmm?"

[Toby] "(Ooh, alley sex then?)"

[Frank] "(Oh, his ice cream was fat for that, I'm sure.)"

[Gene] "(Damn it, there goes my excuse.)"

[Hank] "(Aha, aha, aha, I got your ice cream!)"

"Toby???"

"Oh, sorry, I lost in thought for a moment, so, oh, the long way to your truck then, Puzzle?"

I mean, duh! The long way was the best way to be seen on the Strip and to you know, show off a little. And with so more access walkways to the alley in between the buildings on the Strip, I mean, they offered a lot of places to you know, take a breather from walking the long way to your vehicle, so.

[Both dart into an available alley access walkway]

Yep, it was a mutual darting.

[Mwah, ummah, smack, smooch, lip smack]

"Holy hell, Toby, you kissed me first then? And pushed against me?"

[Mwah, ummah, smack, smooch, lip smack]

"Are you complaining, Puzzle or am I puzzled about things, hmm?"

[Mwah, ummah, smack, smooch, lip smack]

"No, I just said some words while I tried to gather my thoughts, Toby."

[Mwah, ummah, smack, smooch, lip smack]

"We're having sex, Puzzle!"

[Mwah, ummah, smack, smooch, lip smack]

"Whew, this is sex, Toby! But the guys, Toby, they will most certainly become puzzled about things if we go much further. Also, whew!"

Well, I wasn't puzzled at all about what Toby was pushing into me, so, so, um, that's all. Other than we kept kissing and he kept pushing into me! OMG, alley access walkway after alley access walkway! I mean, the alley access walkways are designated for making out and dry humping, so you know, it was stick and move up and down the alley! But I knew how to kiss by the time we reached my truck!

But here's the thing about arriving at my truck. I mean, if I were to have taken my seat in the driver's seat, I mean, through the window, our lips would have been in a good alignment, but since my truck has those side step bars under the doors, I mean, that's where Toby had me sit and oh boy, did that position align something else or what? I mean, well, the alignment was perfect!

And holy smokes, who took over my body and thoughts and started the unbuckling process of Toby's pants? I mean, they were my hands in action and all, but I didn't even know how to do that! But I did that! And screw Toby for smirking so big as I did that! But I didn't stop doing that. Or somebody was doing that. I mean, it was getting done, so I guess it was me.

And by the way, it was me undoing Toby's pants as I sat there gazing at this second heart beat! I mean, the belt, pull, flip, swoosh to the side and Toby's smirk got even bigger! And then just like snapping my fingers at a music concert, snap, the button was undone and Toby's smirk was becoming wide enough to drive a truck through! But the defining moment, right? Pushing his zipper down, tooth by tooth was almost as mesmerizing to me as it was to Toby and oh boy, everything was pulsating and throbbing and the zipper went down tooth by tooth and whoosh, the moment of truth became painfully obvious!

[Siren whoop, lights flash, siren whoop, lights flash, siren whoop]

It was the damn cops who patrolled the alley! Fortunately, well, open truck doors offer a little cover for the reversal of the unbuttoning process! Which Toby did himself because I was way too slow.

"Everything alright here, folks, hmm?"

"Ahh, ahh, yes, officer, um, we were just, um, looking for my, um, we're okay, officer, so?"

"Well, we try hard to keep Middleton 25% respectable, so is this boyfriend or just your boyfriend for the night, hmm? And by the way, alley workers don't kiss, so?"

[Kiss, kiss, smack, smack, smooch, kiss peck]

"Um, no, um, Toby is my boyfriend and we were just leaving, um, so, well, did you just think that I work the alley, officer, hmm?"

"Just doing my job, missy, just doing my job. Anyways, let's straighten things up and take it to your house or at least to the seedy hotel, folks, so move along then."

"The shady hotel, officer?"

"Oh, gawd no, my wife brought home bed bugs from the shady hotel and my girlfriend ended up getting bitten! And so did my girlfriend's daughter! And well, so did my girlfriend's mom, so let's move it along then."

"Well, what about grand mama then, officer?"

"Oh, she's holed up in the old folk's home, so I investigate stuff over there, so, give the boyfriend a few more lip smacks and then let's move this along, folks."

[Mwah, ummah, smack, smooch, lip smack]

"Aha, aha, aha, I mean, have a nice evening folks."

[Whoop, lights flash, phone camera flash, whoop, lights flash]

I mean, talk about a Toby boner killing defining moment, am I right? Yeah, for 30 seconds!

And maybe I was a little faster and less deliberate with the unbolting and the unbuttoning and with the unzipping of his jeans shorts the second time, but whew, Toby was very deliberate with trashing my mouth! I mean, technically, I can't even say that I blew him! But I can say that one of my openings was fucked and fucked hard.

Oh, and I can't even say that I swallowed as Toby went that crazy and deep for a direct deposit!

But I can say that Officer Petey used his computer system to get my phone number, but ewe, bed bug issues, right?

End Puzzle 01