Reconnecting the Dots

She needed to go to therapy—that much was obvious. At first, the issues were small and understandable. It took her a few weeks to feel comfortable enough to take something from the refrigerator without asking and another month before she started requesting foods she liked. But by the two and a half month mark, it got to the point where Ashley's guilt and anger started getting the better of her. There were times when she would be totally involved with the family, only to be found alone in her room the next day, picking away at her guitar, not wanting to be disturbed. They quickly realized that no matter how much love and support they gave her, it wouldn't be enough. She needed professional help. And when they first suggested it, she refused outright, so they kept trying to find ways to convince her, but by the second month the anger and guilt was starting to overwhelm her. They all tried to convince her, but she had dug in her heals.

And to Claire's dismay, Ashley's issues started affecting her husband. Ever since Ashley's return, Claire could tell the demons from Jake's past were reawakening. There were times, especially after a particularly emotional moment, where she would catch Jake with a faraway look in his eyes. She would stop him before his anger consumed him or before he retreated too far into himself, but the frequency of those occurrences had been increasing. So, she decided she needed to do something about it. The question, though, was what? She wasn't about to let that woman destroy her family.

And that's why she knew how to deal with Ashley. Father and daughter were so much alike, it was scary. Not only were they both incredibly musically talented, but there were times when Ashley would do or say something where Claire would have to do a double take. They might not look alike—except for the eyes—but they had similar mannerisms, facial expressions, and speech patterns. But the biggest similarity was the way they dealt with uncomfortable situations—or more specifically, how Jake used to deal with uncomfortable situations.

So, Claire doubled down on her efforts to protect her family. And to her delight, Kara was a huge help. If Ashley and Jake were similar, the same could be said for herself and Kara. There were times when Claire would be focusing on Jake where Kara would take it upon herself to focus on Ashley. And that was another thing she found surprising. Kara and Carter were both on board and didn't feel the least bit slighted if Ashley was given a bit more attention. They understood, and were more than willing to do whatever it took.

Finally, after three months, Claire was able to convince Ashley to attend therapy. When Jake would ask her how she did it, she would joke and say she had special powers, but what she really did was apply the same tactic she used on him: Time and persistence. Going through a similar experience herself, she knew trust was the most important thing to rebuild. So, back then, she made sure never to break his trust. He tested her over and over again, but she never wavered, and over time, the trust grew into love, which was supported by the trust, which was supported by love, and so on and so on. She called it her circle-of-love. It took a while, but eventually it worked. In Ashley's case, she was just as persistent, and it also worked—eventually. And in the seven weeks since Ashley started therapy, there were some improvements, but there were also lots of issues that still needed to be worked out. Claire didn't know how long it would take, but she was happy about the progress she'd seen so far. And a very surprising, but unintended consequence of Ashley therapy, was how it also affected her husband. Seeing Ashley finally on the road to recovery did wonders for him. He had his own way of dealing with things, music being one of them, but in the end, they all came together as a family and did what had to be done.

But the biggest question that remained was: Why didShedo it? Being a mother herself, Claire could never treat her children the wayShetreated Ashley. When Jake first brought up the prospect of contactingHer,Claire knew it most likely had to happen, but was worried how it would affect him. He had come so far and didn't want him slipping back into his old ways. The fact he was even willing to make the call, though, made her love him even more. He was the type of man to do anything for those he loved. But for the preservation of her family, Claire decided to take on the burden alone. She had to. Even though he was willing, she knew it would affect him in ways nobody could expect. She couldn't take that chance. He was her everything, and like him, would do anything for those she loved.

So three weeks ago, Claire put the most daunting, yet important part of her plan into action. She contacted a private investigator to trackHerdown, and today, when she received the phone call, the final part of her plan could be set in motion.

Putting the laptop down, Claire looked around the family room. Her eyes landed on the cable box where the time read 2:26. She patted the napkin in her pocket. All she had to do now was wait for everybody to leave.

-----

The house was empty. Everybody had left and Claire was finally alone. She walked into the kitchen absentmindedly patting her pocket. It was time. However, she paused for a moment, thinking. She felt a bit guilty doing this behind her husband's back. She never did anything behind his back. But her mind was already made up.I'm doing this to preserve my family. It has to be done. Now was not the time to turn back.

Sitting at the kitchen table, Claire reached into her pocket, pulled out the napkin, and put it on the table. Looking at the name and number, she took a deep breath.Here we go.

Taking out her cell phone, she dialed the number. It rang once, twice, then a third time. She grimaced as the fourth ring started to sound. She had prepared for the possibility that it might go to voice mail. It wasn't what she wanted, but it would have to do for now. The fourth ring ended. Expecting voicemail to pick up, she was a caught a bit off guard when she heard a tentative, "Hello."

Claire took a deep breath, and as calmly as possible, said, "Hello. Am I speaking to Gina?"

"Yes. Who's calling?"

Claire's heart pounded in her chest. She was actually talking toHer. She didn't know what to expect, butHervoice didn't sound like anything she'd imagined. It sounded normal. For some reason, Claire expectedHervoice to match the picture she'd painted in her head—that of a monster.

"Hello," cameHervoice again, snapping Claire from her thoughts.

"Yes. I'm sorry. I'm calling in regards to Ashley."

Silence rang out. Claire thoughtShehad hung up untilShesaid in a terse, yet confused tone, "What! Who is this!?"

"My name is Claire, and I'm calling in regards to Ashley. Are you her mother?"

"You bet your ass I am! Who is this!?"

"My name is Claire."

"I know. You already said that. But who the hell are you?"

Steeling herself, Claire said, "I'm Jake's wife."

There was silence for a few seconds, then: "WHAT! What the hell do you..." Then the line went silent. Once again, Claire thought She'd hung up, untilShesaid, "So that's where she went. That...ungrateful...little...bitch. After everything I did for her, she leaves me high and dry and goes to him? Let me tell you something, lady. You tell that little—"

"Now hold on a second." Claire promised herself she wouldn't get into an argument withHer. Claire was calling for answers that would help her family, but she had to walk a fine line. Being too pushy might causeHerto hang up. Claire needed to be careful. Taking a deep breath, she said, "First things first, can we keep things civilized? There's no need for any name calling."

"Screw you. That little bitch up and left me when I needed her. You tell her how disappointed I am...wait. Let me tell her myself. Put her on the phone."

Claire took another deep breath. Right now she felt the need to read this woman the riot act; maybe tellHerwhat a disgrace to motherhood or what a despicable human beingShewas, but that wouldn't accomplish anything. Claire needed to steer this conversation in a direction that would benefit her family. So instead, she asked, "Do you love your daughter?"

The question seemed to catchHeroff guard because no answer came immediately. FinallyShesaid, "What? I...uh...what? Of course I do. What kind of question is that? She's my daughter."

"If you really love her, then you'll answer some questions I have for you."

"What!? What the hell does that mean?"

"Ashley is hurting very badly and is—"

"What!? Put her on the phone. She owes me an explanation for what she did."

Claire ignoredHer. She needed a way to keepHeron the phone, and ifSheknew Ashley wasn't home, She'd most likely hang up. So, Claire carried on: "Ashley is hurting very badly and needs answers. She—"

"She needs answers!? Well, I need some answers, too! Why did that ungrateful little bitch just up and leave, huh? You tell me that. After everything I did for her, she leaves me when I needed her the most."

There's the monster I've was expecting.Claire felt like callingHerout and throwing all the liesShetold Ashley inHerface, but somebody had to be the adult. So instead, Claire calmly said, "I understand your feelings, but as mothers, we need to think of our children first. Don't you agree?"

"What the hell are you talking about? I always put my children first. And I'm not going to sit here and listen to you lecture me on motherhood."

Claire shook her head in disbelief. This woman actually believed she was a good mother. Claire could feel her frustration mounting, but she had to stay on track.

This is for my family.

But before Claire could respond,Shesaid, "If you're not going to put her on the phone, then I don't know why I'm listening to this. I have nothing to say to you, but when you see that ungrateful little bitch, tell her to call me immediately. She has some explaining to do."

NowShewas really starting to piss Claire off, which was rare for her—she never lost her cool. "Please don't call Ashley a bitch," she said a bit defensively. "She's a sweet girl who's hurting and just wants to know the truth. It's the least you can do for your daughter."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh...So you're telling me you didn't lie to Ashley?"

"I...I didn't lie to her," She said, but there was a tone toHervoice Claire couldn't immediately place. Was it guilt?

Yes, it was guilt. Maybe she isn't as bad as I thought. Seeing an opening, Claire took it. "So you didn't tell her that her father molested her and beat you?"

"Wh...what...I...I..." She started to say, then the line went quiet, though Claire could tellShedidn't hang up, because the sound of faint breathing could be heard on the other end.

"Ashley blames herself, you know," Claire continued. "She feels what happened is her fault. If you could only see her now, you might feel a little different. Please, for Ashley's sake, if you truly love her, please tell me the truth. She's such a sweet girl and doesn't deserve this. You say you love her, so do what's right and help your daughter out, and—"

"Bu...but...I...I—"

But Claire was on a roll. "...and as mothers, we should always put our children first. Sometimes we feel like we have to lie—that it might be the only option, but our children depend on us to guide them and—"

"Please stop,"Shesuddenly said in a quavering voice.

Claire sighed in relief, glad to be finally getting through toHer. As a mother herself, she knew a mother's love was universal—even if said mother was a horrible person. Capitalizing on the breakthrough, Claire pushed onward: "So, what happened?"

Silence rang out. Claire waited for a response, but nothing came. She was about to say something, just to break the silence, again, whenShesoftly said, "Kevin..." But then the sound of soft sobbing could be heard.

"Kevin?" Claire prodded gently.

"Y...yes. H...he made me do it."

Claire felt like saying, "Tell me something I don't know," but instead, she said, "I see. But that still doesn't explain why you lied. I can understand if you wanted to divorce Jake, but why the lies?"

Softly,Shesaid, "My kids were all I had. I...I couldn't lose them."

"But don't you think that was unfair to Ashley? If only you could see her now. She blames herself."

"Oh god..."Shequietly sobbed out. "I...I never meant for that to happen. After Kevin left, they were all I had. I...I'm sorry I hurt her. I didn't want that."

She never meant for that happen? What did she think would happen?

Claire shook her head in disbelief, then asked, "But why did you lie about Jake molesting her and beating you?"

"Th...that was Kevin's idea. He let me know Jake was cheating on me. He...he told me he still loved me and w...we could start our own family. He wanted t...to be a father to Ashley, but he said the only way to get full custody was to lie."

She thought Jake was cheating on her? That's a new piece of information.

Claire shook her head, again, in disbelief. It was as Jake always suspected. Some Casanova sweet talkedHerinto betraying him, but that still didn't explain the viciousness in whichShedid it. Or maybe it did? If She thought She was being cheated on...

"And you believed him," Claire said. It was a statement, not a question.

"Believed him?"

"You believed Kevin when he said Jake was cheating on you?"

"Why wouldn't I? He was."

Claire sighed resignedly. "I'm sorry to inform you, but Kevin lied. Jake never cheated on you."

"Yes he did!"Shereplied a bit heatedly. She wasn't quietly sobbing anymore.

Claire, once again, shook her head in disbelief. Here she was, talking to the woman who almost destroyed the man she loved, and for a moment there, she started to feel a bit of sympathy towardsHer. But now...

"He cheated on me,"Shecontinued, "and Kevin was there for me, so we decided to teach Jake a lesson—"

InterruptingHer,Claire said, "Jake didn't cheat on you. He is the kindest, most loving man in the world. He would nev—"

"He did cheat on me. Kevin told me."

"And you believed him!?" Claire replied a bit headedly herself this time. "Was there any proof?"

"No, but—"

"And you still believed him? This is the same man who left you high and dry. Even if you believed him back then, when he left—"

"But Kevin told me he was—"

"No he..."Claire started to say, but then stopped. She promised herself she wouldn't get into an argument. But once again, she felt like throwing every despicable thing She did in Her face. Feeling her anger rising, once again, Claire shook her head.

This woman is delusional.

She needed to calm down. Taking another a deep breath, she decided to steer the conversation back on a track, but before she could speak, She said something that derailed Claire's entire plan. Now, Claire didn't have a mean bone in her body. She was also a very calm person, and in all the years she was married to Jake, they'd had their disagreements—as all marriages do—but not once did she ever raise her voice. They were always able to discuss their issues like adults and come to a compromise. She also never raised her voice where her children were concerned. There were times when she had to use her "stern mom" voice, but she never actually yelled. But this woman was the one who finally drove her over the edge.

What She said was, "While I'm sorry what I did to Ashley, that loser deserved everything he got. He cheated on me and I made him pay. He wasn't a real man. Kevin was. I would do it all over again if I—"

And that's where Claire lost it. "THAT'S ENOUGH!" she yelled at the top of her lungs. "DON'T YOU EVER TALK ABOUT MY—she emphasized the word my—HUSBAND LIKE THAT AGAIN! DO YOU HEAR ME, YOU HUSSY!? YOUR'RE A DISGRACE TO HUMANITY AND MOTHERHOOD! ONLY A DESPICABLE HUMAN BEING WOULD DO THAT TO SOMEBODY—"

"FUCK YOU!" She yelled back.

But Claire ignored the interruption and forged on: "ONLY A DESPICAPABLE HUMAN BEING WOULD DO THAT TO SOMEBODY SHE CLAIMED TO LOVE! BUT YOU KNOW WHAT!? I WANT TO THANK YOU FOR THROWING JAKE AWAY! YOU DON'T DESERVE SOMEBODY LIKE HIM! AND DON'T YOU WORRY! I'LL BE THE MOTHER ASHLEY DESERVES! YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT HER EVER A-GAIN! AND JUST REMEMBER: WHAT COMES AROUND, GOES AROUND! GOOD BYE!" And she ended the call.

Claire sat there panting heavily. "That bitch!" she finally hissed out.

She is as bad as I thought.

Claire clenched her fists and pounded the table in frustration. "Damn her!" Taking a deep breath, Claire tried to calm herself. She didn't like losing control, but that woman went a step too far. Nobody talked about her husband like that. She pounded the table, again, in frustration, then shook her head and sighed resignedly.

I need to calm down.

Putting her face in her hands, Claire sat there trying to reign in her thoughts. Yes, she did lose her cool, but the question was: Did she accomplish what she set out to do? Well, she did learn one new piece of information. She believed Jake was cheating onHer. But Claire knew that wasn't the case. It was obvious Kevin used that at as a ploy—and not a very original one—to get into Her pants. And the fact that She believed him with no proof, showed Her true colors. But would knowing this new piece of information help her family? Claire thought about that for a moment.

Yes, she finally said to herself. It could definitely help. They knew why now, and the reason she had called in the first place was to find out why. Maybe it would allow both Jake and Ashley to have a little closure. Knowing the truth was always the best. But would that be enough? Claire thought about that. Will there ever be enough? she finally asked herself.

But one question she didn't get an answer to—for which she had only herself to blame—was: Why did She keep the letters? Her attitude towards Jake didn't support Her actions. If She truly thought that badly about him, She would have thrown the letters out immediately after receiving them. Claire wracked her brain to come up with a logical reason. She tried putting herself in Her shoes. The only thing she could come up with was maybe subconsciouslySheknew she was guilty? Who knows, Claire said to herself. Trying to figure out the why was pointless.

The important thing is Ashley found them, and now she's here. That's all that matters.

Continuing to gather her thoughts, Claire's mind wandered back throughout the rest of the conversation. She actually caused Claire to lose her cool. Nobody ever did that.

Well, my ex did, she reminded herself. And then she chuckled.Ex's and I don't seem to get along very well.But still, she hated that she lost her cool—she was an adult, not some sixteen year old drama queen. But nobody talked about her husband that way.

She chuckled again. It was kind of satisfying, though.

And did Claire mean was what said? Was she thankful She threw Jake away. Yes, I am. But, did that make her selfish? If she was honest with herself, she probably was, but for the right reasons. Jake had to go through a terrible ordeal—one that almost destroyed him—so they could meet and fall in love. And did she regret that? Claire thought about that for a moment. But the answer came quickly.