- NonHuman
- Redheaded Beauty
- Page 2
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He looked out the window, sad that he wouldn't see the beautiful woman named Rebecca any longer. He sighed heavily. "At least I have something to write about," he said turning back to the others.
"I'll go and start your lunch," Henri said.
"I've not ordered." The writer picked up the menu.
"Don't worry," the manager began. "We know what to give you." He stood and returned the chair, leaving Chance alone with the server.
She smiled at him and blushed. "There's another part of the story," she started. She leaned in and whispered. "It's one that only the women working here know about. Rebecca only appears to men that are good-hearted, men with beautiful spirits. The men she chooses to be with are also unselfish lovers, ones that every woman wants." She stood and kissed his cheek. "I'll be back with your drinks."
Etienne Pettijohn sat silent, stunned at her actions.
- COMMENTS
johnnyjonesover 10 years ago... nonhuman is not my preferred category but this was definitely interesting. I'd love to see the story continue. Perhaps why the wives left if he was so good-hearted and a good lover? Is he the exception that sees Rebecca twice or more? Why is he really called Chance? What is in the future with Ashley? What is the nature of the draining? Does he get his writing Mojo back?
Anonymousover 10 years agoNice story, but one editing note. Opaque means NOT transparent or translucent.
Anonymousover 10 years agoI caught myself in what I realized later was déja vu, when it was revealed that the red-headed woman was a ghost. After reading that the men never saw her again, I wondered if Etienne's experience would be any different.
But, then, to discover the server's story about the ghost, I wondered if Etienne would find himself seduced by her, or another of the hotel staff. I still do.....
Five stars, and a hope for a second chapter in the story.
angelicbeautyover 10 years agoI like the story a lot. It seems a bit rushed and the plot is very short. If you continue with the story, which i hope you do, i would love to see more of what happened to Chance and the redhead.
