Rendezvous

"I know, hun. Unbelievable is what I'd call it. Mayhap indescribable. You are truly the most passionate, insatiable woman I have ever been with."

Callia smiled, " I aim to please."

Callia knew she wasn't the only woman he'd been with. His skill as a lover was far too great to be a novice. She wondered how many others he had bedazzled during his time out on the range. Jealously peaked, yet she was loathe to show it. She knew he enjoyed her because she was like him in her attitude about their affair. They both enjoyed the thrill of the conquest without being tied to it permanently. Yet something deep inside Callia wanted more. She longed to possess him in every way possible...body, heart, and soul. She longed for that eternal love, that great passionate love.

He broke her thoughts as he slid out of her body with a groan. "I think it's time to clean up."

Callia groaned as he removed his weight from her. "Ugh, I'm sore. I think we made pigs of ourselves. But morning is such the perfect time to indulge our passions."

Nathan chuckled, as he gave her a lusty grin. Rolling away from her, he helped her up and lead her back to the creek where they made a game of washing. Carnal desires returned and he pulled her to him. She wrapped her body around his and indulged in their need for one another once more while standing in the water. Nathan wasn't sure what is was about Callia that made him keep wanting her as he did. Usually once he had had a woman he had quenched whatever desire he had for her. Yet he couldn't understand what made her so different. He knew he must discover her allure. What made him want her so? She had spoke of a life together yet he didn't feel it was in his blood to settle down with her or any woman just yet...maybe never. Sooner or later, he'd have to tell her and hope she'd understand. Until then, why not enjoy what she offered?

A week passed before they reached The Moonwood. Occasionally they had encountered small bands of Orcs and Gnolls. Callia and Nathan fought side by side claiming victory over their attackers. Stopping in Quaevarr, they re-supplied and spent a night in the inn. It felt good to sleep in a bed.

Setting out for the Clan Blackhawk hold, Callia became increasingly nervous. She knew Karowyn would have a few words for her about her behavior. And what about her mother? Would she still be hanging on waiting for her daughter? What was ailing her? Questions assailed Callia and with each passing moment, her anxiety grew.

Nathan noticed it right away. He understood her moods well, even in the short time he had been around her. "Callia," he said, stopping her. "I can tell you are nervous and worried, but I'm sure everything will be fine."

"I hope so. My mother means a lot to me. I know I haven't told her how much in a long time. I think only of myself and my needs more than I should. It's not only her on my mind. I am sure I have a lot to answer for. I almost dread facing Karowyn." Callia admitted. "I know he'll be disappointed, maybe even angry with me."

Nathan drew her into his arms. "Just don't dwell on it right now. You'll cross that bridge when you come to it. Focus on your mother."

"I will," Callia smiled. "Thank you."

"Anything for you, luv," he said as he kissed her on the cheek. "Let's go."

Callia led him to the clan hold. As she reached the thick outer wall surrounding the hold, she took in a deep breath. This was it. She was home at last after many months. She walked up to the entrance, a smile firmly in place hiding any anxiety she was feeling deep inside.

"Welcome home, Callia," several armed guards greeted her amongst various guffaws and chuckles. Nathan cocked his head as he thought he overheard whispers from a few of the men about the camp lightskirt being back. He scowled, yet kept his angst to himself. He had heard some of the same things the last time he was here. It seemed most of the men knew Callia in more than a personal way. He had even heard her referred to as the camp mattress, because everyone had taken their turn laying on her. But truth be told, like mother, like daughter.

"It is good to be home. How is my mother?" she asked, noticing some of the gestures from various members of the guard.

"Last I heard she was fairly sick. The shaman would likely know more."

"Or Lord Karowyn."

"Thank you, Daelric." Callia replied as she lead Nathan through the entrance. They walked through the maze of hide covered lodges until she reached her mother's. Her heart pounded as she stood outside.

She took in a deep breath. Apprehension gripped her and she sent a look of longing at Nathan.

"Be strong, luv. Go on in," he urged.

Callia shook her head. " Maybe I should speak to Karowyn first."

Callia said as she headed for the central meeting lodge where she expected him to be this time of day. She found him to be where she thought he would be. He was speaking to the council when Callia walked in. Quietly she waited at the back of the lodge. She loved hearing Karowyn speak. His words were most eloquent. He was a born leader. As she listened, she became lost in her thoughts. She thought back to her youth. How she had idolized big brother Karowyn. She used to follow him around when he was home. She recalled how he used to take her hunting when she was still in pigtails. That seemed like eons ago. Now there was always some meeting he had to attend. There was always some demand on his time. Her mind wandered back to how wildly she had grown up...she had such little supervision. Her mother let her do whatever she wanted.

She recalled how Amakiir could be such a sneak. He often tortured her with his budding magical abilities. How she hated him for it. She hated that Shocking Grasp spell he would hit her with repeatedly. His torture had ultimately colored her judgement against magic. It was only until Onis had taught her differently that her hatred lessened. He and Briar had taught her otherwise.

Callia jumped, startled out of her reverie, as she felt someone touch her shoulder. "Huh?"

"Callia?" Karowyn repeated.

"Sorry, I was thinking." Karowyn stifled a chuckle. "That's a new one."

"Ha-ha." Callia retorted.

"I see you made it home. Have you been to see mother?"

"No, I haven't yet. I wanted to talk to you first. I need to know what is wrong with her. How did she get sick? What happened? What's ailing her?" She blurted out.

"She's dying from the wasting. The shaman could cure her. He could ease her pain. She says she has lived her life."

"Is she just giving up?" Callia asked, as tears stung her eyes.

"I'm afraid so, unless you can convince her otherwise."

"What can I do?" Callia asked.

"Go to her. Talk to her." Karowyn replied, as he walked out of the council lodge with her.

"Why has she given up?"

"She said she was tired of living. She was doing fine until Tharundel left. It is a sad tale, Callia. One best heard from her."

"Tharundel left her? Why? Where'd he go?" Callia asked, confused.

"That I can not tell you because I do not know the answers. I do know he left and mother hasn't been the same ever since. We don't know if he is alive or dead."

"Has no one searched?"

"Yes, we have many times." Karowyn replied.

"I will talk to her. I will convince her not to give up, to accept whatever healing the shaman can provide for her. How long has Tharundel been gone?"

"Three months."

Callia let out a deep sigh, shaking her head. "I thought they were deeply in love. I don't understand. Why would he leave her?"

"That's not all that weighs heavy on her mind. It's not only Tharundel."

"Who else?"

"You."

"Me?" Callia squeaked. "What did I do?"

"What haven't you done?" Karowyn retorted, "We hear things here. The rumors alone are enough to cause her more grief. Did you ever stop to think how your actions affect other people? How it sheds an ill light on all of us? Do you ever think at all? I have enough to deal with without constantly refuting rumors of you screwing half orcs and lord only knows what else? Callia, use the brain you have inside that beautiful head of yours. You are better than that. You waste your beauty, your talents, and your life on men who are unworthy of you. I know that human ranger returned with you. Think, Callia. He's human. He'll die long before you. I don't want to see you throwing your life away. I don't want you to grieve for him for the rest of your life. You are so young. You have so much to offer someone worthy when the time is right. This human...I spoke to him at length when he delivered your last letter. He isn't interested in settling down. He has women scattered throughout Faerun. You are one of many and that is all you'll ever be to him. Set your sights elsewhere and save yourself from that kind of lifelong torment. And as far as you playing matchmaker for me, don't. I will find my own bride. And one more thing, Callia, as far as that moon elf wizard, you'll only be wasting your time. You can do better than a wizard who'll lock himself away in some tower. Is that what you want?"

"No, I'm over him. He is but a fond friend who has saved my life on numerous occasions. And I've never ever screwed a half orc. You should know me better than that. As for Nathan, I know how he is. I'm only having fun. Maybe you should try having some once in a while? Or have you forgotten how amidst all of the endless meetings and your duties as clan leader. I don't need a lecture from you."

"No, Callia, you need a wake up call." Karowyn retorted. "Just promise me you'll think things through before making any rash decisions."

"Yes, I'll think. I'll consider how my behavior makes you look bad." Callia countered as haughtily as she could.

Karowyn scowled at her, and took in a deep breath. "Callia, your behavior reflects more on your mother more than it does me. So if you must cause her more grief, that truly shows how selfish you really are."

Callia took his words like a slap in the face. They hurt more than she wanted to admit. She never wanted to cause her mother any grief or any pain. Was Karowyn right? Or was he just being the same overbearing hard ass in her mind she often portrayed him to be? She shrugged off her thoughts and turned matters back to him.

"And what about you, big brother? You have yet to follow up on the council ruling. You have yet to take a wife. Were you aware that your precious Khaira is alive and well within The High Forest?"

"Yes, I am. Things can not be, though," he replied, with a shake of his head. " Her death grieved me tremendously."

"Do you know she was reincarnated in the form of a bear? She is now the protector of Greengrove. She, along with our other companions, fought a demon for possession of it. She grabbed hold of it and wouldn't let go while the human fighter and the halfling rogues helped defeat it. I guess they banished it back to hell. Khaira got her voice back, but she remained a bear. She even changed her name. She took us all to her village. I met her mother and father. I can see why you and her father were friends. He is quite admirable."

"Yes, Moorkell is. I saw many qualities I admired in him in Khaira. It grieves me that she will never be mine as I wanted," he replied.

"I only knew her as a bear, and damn, was she ever headstrong and stubborn. No one dared make her mad. One of our companions threatened the little female halfling rogue and she hit him with a water spell. Mind you, we were in The Spine of the World Mountains. She just about froze him." Callia laughed. "She was something else."

Karowyn laughed. "She did that to me in the desert. It was so hot. I could have kissed her."

"Why didn't you?" Callia asked. "You should've just grabbed her up and planted a kiss on her. If she was meant to be yours, why not woo her? You had just saved her life!"

"I tried. She wanted no part of it." Karowyn sighed.

"Then it is her loss. Now she's a bear. She knows she made a mistake. She and I had a talk once she got her voice back. She knows she misjudged you. I told her you are a good man who would've given her anything she wanted. She knows she messed up and said she'd spend the rest of her life paying for it. She said she knew deep down you were her destiny and that she was impressed how you saved her. She said she'd most likely spend the rest of her life guarding Greengrove, that she'd probably never marry, even though she'll gain the ability to change her form back into an elf."

Karowyn nodded. "I would never wish that on her. I would want her to be happy and know love. She is not for me, though. She is but an echo of what she once was."

"You are still grieving her loss. I can see it in your eyes." Callia observed.

"I loved her very much."

"You didn't even know her."

"Ah, but I did. I knew her father. She was so much like him. It was the only reason I would marry a moon elf."

"I am sorry I did not get to her in time to prevent her death. I would have brought her back to you if she had been alive." Callia said as she hugged him. "I must go to mother."

She flitted away towards her mother's lodge before the conversation turned even more serious than it already was. As she entered her mother's lodge, she noticed it was cold and damp. Almost dreary. She could smell the foul sickness. It permeated her lungs and made it difficult to breathe without coughing or gasping for air. Callia left the hide door open to allow fresh air to enter.

"Mama," Callia called out, as she walked to the raised pallet she lay upon. "Mama, it's me, Callia. I've come home."

Allia turned her gaunt face towards her daughter. Callia let out a startled gasp, her eyes growing ever wide.

"Mama," she cried, cringing at the sight of her sunken eyes, hollow cheeks and ghostly pale complexion. She had the look of an old crone. She had become rail thin, the skin hanging from her bones. Callia barely recognized her once beautiful mother. The disease had ravaged her, leaving behind an empty shell of what she had been.

"Mama," Callia repeated. "How? When? Why?"

Allia stared at her with a blank expression, "My daughter, my time is gone. The wasting has consumed me," she dryly croaked, wetting her parched, cracked lips.

"No, mama, it doesn't have to be this way. Please, I don't want you to die. I need you. Please allow the shaman to heal you. He can cure your body."

"But even he can not cure a broken heart," she whispered.

"What happened, mama? Why did Tharundel leave? When I left, you two were so happy."

"There are many things you don't know or understand, my child. This is one of them. Before Tharundel came here, he had a wife and a family with her. His village was attacked and she was carried off. He tried desperately to find her, to no avail. Years passed and he wandered aimlessly, searching in vain. Then he and I met. I had you by then. It took him a long time to get comfortable with me. He did eventually fall in love, as did I. Only recently did he learn that his wife was alive. He never married me because he felt he would betray her memory. Yes, he loved me, but not the same way. He went to her. He knew of the wasting. I kept it from everyone here, including you. I could no longer give him what his body desired. Ours was a relationship based on carnal need. I so grieve for him because I love him more than anything. I loved him more than I loved your father."

"Who is my blood father?" Callia asked.

"Do not ask that of me, for I can not tell you."

"Why can't you? Don't I deserve to know?"

"Callia, I have not the will to live. I have not the heart to continue on, for Tharundel was my heart." Allia replied, weakly.

"No, mama, I do not want you to die. I need you here with me. Who will I turn to for support if you are not here? You have always been my strength."

"Karowyn is here for you."

"No, mama, Karowyn doesn't understand how I feel. He is not a parent. He knows not how to comfort me as you do."

"Baby girl, I am tired and long to rest. I long not to feel such pain." Allia pleaded, extending a withered hand to her vibrant, headstrong daughter.

"Mama, tell me. Where is Tharundel?" Callia asked, somehow knowing her mother knew and had not told anyone.

"He is residing north of here, almost at the northernmost reaches of The Moonwood."

"Why did you not tell Karowyn? He said Tharundel was searched for." Callia asked, trying to understand.

"I had not the heart to tell Karowyn the truth. He would have gone after Tharundel. Too many forces work against Karowyn. I could not risk his life."

"And you think I shall not?" Callia countered, angered.

"Callia, leave well enough alone. Tharundel has made his choice."

"And you have obviously made the choice to die, regardless of how the rest of us who love you would feel when you are gone. The shaman can heal you. Time will mend your broken heart. There are other men within the clan who would gladly join with you and be your husband. I need you, mama. Is it wrong for me to be selfish in wanting you here with me? I need you to be here when I decide to settle down and become a mother. I can not do it without you. I need your knowledge. Don't you want to know your grandchildren?" Callia pleaded as tears slipped down her face.

"Callia, are you with child?" Allia's eyes seemed to momentarily light up.

"No, mama, not yet, but I have thought of it. I have died and come back. The way I look at things is different. I want to find one man to be with. If all is right and we are in love, only then will I forgo the precautions I have so faithfully stuck to and hope to conceive a child. Then I shall be complete. But I need you," Callia replied.

"I will think on it, my child. I am forever grateful the heavens granted me the joy of having you." Allia smiled a rare smile. A twinkle graced her eyes and Callia felt she was convincing her mother to hang on.

"The joy of having me? You sound as if you never had any other children?" Callia questioned, her confusion mounting. "You are my only blood child," Allia confessed.

"Karowyn is not my blood brother? And what of Amakiir and Liam?"

"No, they aren't. They are your clan brothers, not blood." Allia said, stunning her daughter.

"Why wasn't I told before now?" Callia jumped up, knocking over the low backrest she'd sat upon.

"I wanted to wait until you were old enough to understand. Karowyn is your brother in every sense of the word. What does it matter that it is not by blood?" Allia replied, hoping to soothe her.

"It is not the same. How dare you destroy my illusion?" Callia retorted.

"Your illusion, eh? And what illusion might that be, Callia? An illusion of power and importance? You ride his coattails because it suits you well. No one dares mess with you because of him." Fire blazed within Allia's eyes and she pushed herself up to her elbows. Gathering what strength she still possessed, she sat up, swinging her legs to the floor. She stood on wobbly legs until she got her bearings.

"Let me tell you something, child. You are strong enough to stand on your own two feet. You need not ride Karowyn's coattails. His path to glory is not yours. Nor should you use his name to make yourself seem greater than you are. Your time will come only when you have matured enough and are ready for it. You fancy yourself to have such power to be like Karowyn, yet you have not learned what he has. You have yet to understand what having power means. What sacrifices you must make for the good of those you lead. You only crave the power of being in such a position will provide you. You are not ready. You are young. Do not rush headlong into something you are not ready for. You must continue to grow and learn." Allia scolded, standing firmly on her own two feet with her arms braced on her hips. She felt life course through her body, invigorating her. Color returned to her cheeks and her eyes took on a renewed glow.