Reunion (the Horror)

"Just don't be stupid!"

Thursday I went down the checklist. One credit card was left open, the one Jane carried, but the credit line was reduced from thirty thousand to ten thousand dollars. We paid off the balance every month, so there was little danger this would alert Jane before the day of reckoning.

Friday morning at 8 am I was sitting in the attorney's lobby. He almost smiled when he walked in the door. He went right to his desk and handed me the envelop sitting there with my name on it. I signed where I needed to and he reminded me as I walked out the door, "Remember, I said don't be stupid."

I drove to the rental car office at SeaTac on my way south to Olympia and drove away with a white utility van. Here I sit down the block from Allen Ross's house (on the side furthest from the school, didn't want to get picked up as a pervert), waiting to see if this is the day my marriage blows up forever.

++++++++++++++

At 11:45 Jane comes around the corner wearing her jogging gear. She heads toward Ross's house, up the steps, reaches under a planter and lets herself in the door; just like it's her home. At 11:55 Allen Ross pulls up in his Mercedes and parks in the garage.

At 11:56 I drive the van over to Sarah's house. Sarah is surprised to see me, but not as surprised as when I tell her why I'm there. I tried to tell her in a way that wouldn't shock her, but that's probably being unrealistic. I asked her to call her husband Jim and meet us at home as soon as he could get away. I knew when this was over that Sarah would need Jim's strength.

"No Dad, no. That just can't be true. Mom loves you. She'd never cheat on you and I can't be that stupid; if she was cheating, I'd know. You must have it all wrong."

"Sarah, I'd give anything for it not to be true. I loved your mother for over twenty-five years. Damn, we were going to celebrate our twenty-fifth anniversary next year. But let me tell you what I saw."

I told Sarah all the evidence I had so far. Sarah remained reluctant to believe. We picked Bill Junior out of his crib and took Sarah's car with Junior in his car seat around the corner and parked in front of Allen Ross's house. Sarah stayed in the car while I went to the front door with the manila envelope.

I had to ring and knock before the shithead answered the door in his bathrobe.

"Who the fuck are you?" Pleasant guy.

"I'm Jane's husband, can you please call her to come to the door. I want to talk to her."

He stood there with his mouth hanging open, he tried to shut the door, but I was prepared for that and stuck my foot in the jamb; it hurt like hell, but kept the door open. I busted it open with my shoulder and yelled inside, "Jane, come here right now!"

Ross kept pushing on the door but it wasn't doing him any good because now my torso was in the way. I kept yelling for Jane to come to the door. I don't know how, but I kept my cool and didn't threaten either Ross or Jane; but I did keep shouting for her to come to the door.

When Jane finally appeared, she had her jogging gear back on, I'm assuming she was naked when Ross answered the door. She had a frightened look in those eyes I loved.

"Bill, what's going on? Why are you here?"

"That's not the real question Jane; the real question is - why are you here?"

I took this opportunity to grab the lapel of Ross's robe and pull it open, he was naked underneath the robe, of course.

Jane looked past me at this moment, the three of us were still standing at the door. I turned around and saw what Jane was staring at, Sarah was out of her car and watching the entire episode.

"You had to bring our daughter?" The bitch was mad at me!

"No, she wanted to come because she said there was no way her mother could be cheating on our marriage. She was anxious to prove this was all a figment of my imagination. And you can be pissed at me all you want, but I didn't make this mess, you did!"

I was starting to lose it, so needed to back out now. I handed Jane the manila envelope, she touched it as if I handed her a live grenade (only in my dreams).

"I'll be staying with Jim and Sarah tonight. You can stay with your long lost boyfriend. Read the paperwork, get a lawyer, don't come home until you understand what's in those papers and you can abide by the terms. I'll have Jim bring your suitcase and personal items from their house. I don't know what Sarah and Jim are going to do from now on, that's their decision. But you and I are getting a divorce. Goodbye Jane."

I turned and walked away. I thought I heard a wail from Jane, but Ross was slamming the door too hard to tell for certain.

"Dad, I'm so sorry. You better drive us back to the house. I don't think I can make it." Sarah practically collapsed in my arms as I opened the passenger door for her.

+++++++++++++

While my life sucked from that moment and for months to come, I don't think it compared to how much worse it was for Jane.

Jim was shocked when he was told about Jane and Allen Ross. He was so pissed that for months he refused to allow Jane in their home or to see her grandson. Sarah didn't argue with Jim; if Jim was pissed, Sarah was livid. I was in their home when Jane called Sarah to talk. Sarah basically called her own mother everything short of 'whore' and told Jane that she may never forgive her for breaking her father's heart.

Ross lost the Taylor account, and thanks to a call from Jeff Taylor to Ross's boss, eventually lost his job. Ross blamed Jane for his run of bad luck and ended up throwing her out of his house. Jane ended up moving in with her folks. Sarah later told me Jane's mother and father weren't happy with the situation, but realized Jane didn't have too many alternatives until the divorce and the financial settlement was finalized.

The divorce was final within six month; my battery of lawyers worked it out that Jane doesn't get a thing from the sale of the patent. They were able to shield almost all the money because the patent was sold to a foreign company and my portion was placed in an offshore trust; don't ask me how, all I know is it cost me six figures this make it all work, but it kept the money out of Jane's hands. She did get plenty, half the sale of our house, half of our savings, but well short of millions.

Soon after the divorce I did get a letter from Jane, but it didn't explain why she cheated. Maybe her excuses made sense to her but not to me. It contained the usual excuses - empty nest, feeling lonely, needing closure with Ross (even after all these years). What the letter didn't explain was why she would jeopardize what I thought was a great marriage just for such bullshit reasons.

Jane reacted poorly to her new reality - the loss of her marriage, the separation from Sarah and Bill Junior, and finally the second separation from Ross. Her behavior became erratic, she started drinking and continued to go downhill. Jane ended up going into rehab at her parents' incidence. I suppose most jilted husbands would feel some pleasure from seeing their whore ex-wife get what she deserves and there are times when a small smile crossed my lips thinking of her suffering. But let's face it, I loved this woman for so many years, so many years trying to shield her from pain, how could I just stop caring?

Thank goodness for the support I received from my kids. I may have been uneasy about destroying my ex-wife, but I had no qualms about messing with Ross.

I got a chuckle out of a couple things Jim did even after his dad got Ross fired. One evening Jim looked over the back fence and saw Ross entertaining a young woman. Jim went to the fence, called the woman over and proceeded to ask how she felt hanging out with a guy who fucked a married woman, then dumped her when the woman needed him. Jim laughed when the woman walked out the side gate, He watched as Ross walked out of his back door carrying two wine glasses and looking around the yard for his date.

Jim did the same thing a few weeks later when Ross was entertaining a group of friends in his backyard. Jim stood at the fence and asked the group what they thought of their scumbag friend. But the last straw for Ross came a month later when I was helping the kids with their move to a new home; Sarah had to get away from Ross and they needed a bigger place since Sarah was pregnant again..

Ross was out back cutting his lawn. I told Jim to wait a couple minutes, then start recording the scene on his smart phone, but make certain to put his thumb over the microphone. I jumped over the fence and started to talk to Ross in a low voice. I said a few things to get him riled.

Ross was so pissed that he took the bait. Jim caught it on video. I was standing with my hands at my side when Ross took the first swing. I was ready for it and ducked enough to only get clipped. My first roundhouse caught Ross right in the nose. The sound of his nose crunching and the sight of the blood made my heart swell. The second roundhouse caught Ross in the solar plexus. Ross doubled over and began puking. I had to back up fast to avoid getting my shoes covered with his bile. As he leaned over puking I grabbed his ear, twisted the hell out of it and whispered, "Next time you won't be so lucky, next time you'll get seriously hurt."

Ross was still doubled over when I walked out his yard through the front. Somehow his Mercedes got keyed (juvenile, I know, but it just seemed like the right thing to do at that moment).

I immediately went to the police station with Jim. My story was Ross invited me over to his yard, I figured it was to apologize, but when I got there, Ross took a swing at me and I only defended myself. Jim showed the cops his recording and I swore out a complaint of assault. Hours later Ross got out of the emergency room and headed to the police station to swear out a complaint against me.

The whole episode came down to "he said - he said" and I ended up walking out of the court house scot-free.

+++++++++++

It's funny (not hah-hah funny), I spent my entire career believing in the 'win-win' philosophy. Always looking for the way that both parties to a contract walk out of the room feeling good. There's nothing win-win in a divorce, at least nothing I can point to; it's definitely 'lose-lose', no matter how bad you stick it to your cheating ex-spouse.

It's been two years since that awful afternoon sitting in that rented van. I wish I could say that I met a thirty-something bikini model who loved to give deep throat head and pledged her everlasting love and fidelity to me, but we all know life isn't really that kind. I had twenty-four great years with the woman I loved with all my heart. I have two great kids - yes, I consider Jim to be a son, and now two great grandchildren. Financially, I'm in great shape - do you know how many men get shafted by the system and end up living in a one-room apartment while supporting a cheating ex-wife? Too many, but at least that's not my fate.

No, I have enough money to live comfortably and even travel. I'm currently spending a month touring Italy on a Ducati. Even took in the MotoGP races in Mugello. But as I sit having an espresso outside a café in Florence, I have to fight back the tears. Jane and I always said we'd do this together, tour Italy on a motorcycle with no deadlines and only each other. Now I'm doing it without her.

Jane did get out of rehab, but still lives with her parents. Sarah and Jim allow her to visit her grandchildren for no more than an hour every month. I think Sarah does as a form of torture, she still hasn't forgiven her mother.

The question haunts me, "How could she do this to us?"

Life isn't a movie where every question is answered before the credits. It's more like a Joseph Conrad novel; life just is - and often absurd - and the good guys don't always win.

I finish my espresso, put the helmet back on, start the bike and ride into my own Heart of Darkness.