Seawater Pours From My Heart Ch. 02

She bit into the apple and tapped her chin. "I don't know," she said, shrugging. "You were mating with me so well, I felt like I was flying, and my voice was burning away the clouds in my path until I reached a place of great peace. When it passed, I felt so good I could do nothing but scream or else I felt I would burst, and the voice carried it out of me."

"Your tongue allowed your mind to link with mine through contact with my tongue, do you think our parts coming together so deeply made the understanding permanent within you?" I asked.

"Perhaps. It feels very unique. I simply know how to create your words. It was a very powerful release of emotions, perhaps that penetrated the fog that surrounds whatever hidden store of common language I have within my mind."

"If only it worked both ways. I only feel relaxed. And hungry."

She laughed and I couldn't look away from the sight of it for a moment.

"Eat this, then!" she said, embarrassed by my focus on her newfound ability, pointing at the apple in my hand. "What is this called, anyway?"

"They're called apples. I never quite appreciated them until now."

Mana worked on her apple for a bit and then said quietly, "I haven't appreciated how good you make me feel."

"Oh, hush now, Mana. All is well."

"I mean it. I've been on my own for so long, I was driven by greed and fear. The thought of losing you threatened this treasure of happiness I've come upon being mated with you. And being mated by you," she blushed

"I've never felt this good, either. I will certainly show you my appreciation more from now on. Who knows, a ship may not even come."

Mana smiled slightly, and said no more. We carved the rest of the apples down and I filled the crate with the cores. I scratched a message onto the floor of the box with a rock, just for good measure. I sealed the crate again as best I could and pushed it into the water, where Mana pulled it with a hand out to sea.

She grinned at me when she returned, but I knew she wasn't happy, despite her decision to aid me. I embraced her and thanked her for helping me. I told her all would be well and she brightened a little and agreed. She kissed me and through our unspoken link, she told me as long as we were mated, no matter if we were together, she would be happy.

I felt my heart crack as I hoped that apple crate would crack against a reef before it was spotted by a ship.

++++++++

I wondered what I really wanted for the weeks that followed the arrival and departure of the cache of apples. Not even the lack of rain for a couple sets of days shook the conflict that drowned my heart. The love we made, and the love we showed each other leaked through the hole that was rent through my heart. The pressure slowly built within my engorged organ. I feared I would burst, dissimilar from the bright burst Mana described, for mine was fueled by turmoil. Mana noticed the change after a couple weeks but made no mention of it, for the sake of keeping our time together pleasant.

We would eat fish together after I awoke, caught by Mana in the early hours of the morning. The taste was trite to me, by that point, but it was of little importance, so I ate them as contentedly as Mana.

We swam together in the afternoons, sometimes with few moments unfilled with talk and laughter, other times scarcely a word was spoken. Mana showed me how to swim like she did, my legs undulating in place of a tail. I'd follow her deep below to the sea floor close to shore, gaining oxygen enough to stay down there from her mouth on mine. Shells and shiny rocks caught my eye on the bottom while she chased fish equally as bright and beautiful. Afterwards we would sink onto the beach and allow the sun to dry us while we dozed in each other's arms.

Inevitably, this led to lovemaking and extended periods of kissing. Though our choice of positions was limited due to my partner's unique body, every time our bodies touched felt magical, and loving. We attuned ourselves to the other's body, increasing the already tremendous level of pleasure we bestowed upon each other to blinding heights. We became one everyday, more often than not multiple times in a row until we were so sapped of energy we couldn't move.

Our exhausting mating would drive us to hunt once again, and retire to the cave to eat and talk until we fell asleep.

This routine was heavenly, for the first couple weeks. The better it felt, the more guilt I faced within myself. Mana's smile and the sounds she made in the throes of passion made me feel evil for causing them. I hoped the remains of the mysterious ship we were waiting for would wash up on shore, so I could accept that I was never going to leave the island, and I could live my life with the mermaid to the fullest. But we both knew that ship would come, and it did.

It was the morning I was sure Mana would finally confront my faraway look and remote presence during coitus that the massive three masted vessel appeared on the horizon. It's stark white sails clouds of fate floating above us all.

Mana and I looked to each other, and she nodded, before diving into the sea and swimming out of sight. Numbly, I stepped onto the beach and sparked my signal fire into a tall beacon of smoke to attract my rescuers. The ship spotted it quickly, and turned toward my island. It began to drift closer and closer, though through my tears I could hardly gauge its distance. I wanted Mana, but we could not risk her being spotted, in case the mariners expressed an interest too keen on up-close examination. I would glance back at the island once I was on board, and I would see her once last time. We didn't entertain the idea of carrying our relationship into the other world any longer. We both knew it wasn't possible.

The ship stopped and a lifeboat was lowered down the side. Two sailors and a man in a dark uniform were aboard, the former delegated to rowing while the latter gentleman crouched on the bow, peering at my island home.

"Ahoy!" he called as the boat came ashore. The sailors hopped over the sides and held the boat still before it ran too far from the water. The well dressed man wore some kind of cover appropriate to naval officers and a rather brief mustache under his birdlike nose. He peered down from either side of it with an arrogant degree of confidence.

"Greetings, sir." He extended a hand and I took it after a moment's hesitation, for I had not seen another man since I buried the Lookout.

"Hello," I said quietly, attempting to meet his eye.

His wooden smile shifted with his cocked head as he noticed something about me. His eyes did not falter, however, and he trained them on mine like a broadside.

"Did you set that apple crate afloat?" he asked.

"I did. I'm glad you found it."

"Yes. Well, if it were up to me, I would charge you for the cargo inside but the Captain wishes you only to be brought aboard and to port with us."

I almost missed his attempt at a joke, for degradation of my social skills or the veracity of his attempt I was unsure. I showed him my teeth but it must not have looked much like a smile, for he hid his own and made a coughing sound.

"Let's get you back to the ship. Is there anything you need to bring along with you?"

I looked around the camp, to the Lookout's cairn, and at my hidden cave. I shook my head and held up the makeshift spear as the only item worth taking.

"I see. Come."

I followed the stiff man to the boat and sat on the bench closest to the bow. The sailors pat my back before taking to their oars, likely sympathizing with what they perceived as a castaway. I smiled at them but turned back to the island, absorbing as much of it into my memory as I could. It was an unsightly, terribly tiny piece of dirt, but it was calm, and it was a sanctuary of a love I could never hope to recreate. I swallowed down the urge to cry when I noticed it just begin to shrink as we neared the side of the great ship.

The officer climbed up the rigging first and held out his hand to help me over the side. I accepted, for I felt weak and took in a multitude of faces staring at me from various stations of duty.

"Back to work, gentlemen. We've got to get back onto the route, no more dallying," the officer said firmly. Men grumbled, used to the strict treatment and turned back to their tasks. "Up here, sir. You must meet the Captain before you retire."

I nodded and followed him up the steps to the quarterdeck. A short, dark woman stood at the center of the deck, accompanied only by a tall, serious looking man in fine clothing. Her eyes were bright and scrutinizing as a captain's should be. She held her arms behind her back until she offered me a hand to shake. I shook her hand and regarded her as captain.

"Captain Fair Eve, at your service," she said, bowing slightly. "You've already met my first mate, Mr. Ire." The named officer nodded and excused himself back to his deck duties. "And this is the Count of Darkbay, Elcho Eel," she said, introducing the stoic gentleman beside her. "It was his insistence we check these islands that we found you."

"Relieved to meet you," he said, keeping his hands to himself. "I feared we would not find you in time."

"I am relieved as well, sir. I was beginning to accept my fate here," I said, gesturing toward the island.

They both glanced back at the tiny island and looks of sympathy and puzzlement crossed their faces, respectively.

"How did you survive in such a yard?" the Captain asked. " How long have you been stranded here?"

I told her I had fallen off a ship during a storm and asked her if she had any knowledge regarding its fate.

"I had heard about you, actually. You were one of two men unaccounted for once it made it to port," she said.

I nodded and crossed the deck to lean against the stern. "The other man was a lookout. He tried to rescue me but he drowned. I buried him on the island."

They were quiet for a moment and then the Count said, "His death was not in vain. If not for him, you would have perished as well. We will inform the family once we reach our destination."

"Yes, if not for him," I said.

"May we set sail, sir?" the Captain asked.

I broke from the island and found comfort in her kind eyes. "Oh, yes. Let's put it behind us, Captain."

"Very well. Let's get underway boys!" she called out to the deck below.

The sailors cried out their acknowledgement and the flurry of action characteristic of a ship shoving off was set loose. I resigned myself from all the noise and stared out at my island. Part of me was glad Mana had not stuck her head out of the water, while the other part was heartbroken. I felt myself begin to come undone, so I started to whistle the tune she had always sung when she was happy. I wasn't one for whistling, but I knew the song so well I could produce it with ease. I imagined a squall taking the notes over the sea and around the hill, swooping downward to enter the grotto and dive through the hole that was Ruby's entrance.

I imagined hearing her respond with the calm measure she produced when she was carrying the apple crate into the distance. I closed my eyes and I could hear it. I felt it enter the empty space of my mind and manifest itself into the being of Mana in my mind's eye. She sat on the rock that was our island, and she sang her sad song, a song of mourning. We had put our love into a box and willed it to sink beneath the waves for the sake of my life, the very life Mana had plucked from the oblivion of the sea to preserve and love and enrich, that I had abandoned in the first place during that storm. I saw myself flounder before the shore, miniscule compared to the mermaid and the rock. She sang on, scoring the rightful end of my life.

"Do you hear that, Elcho?"

"Yes, I do. It's not coming from the men."

I hadn't realized I was holding my breath until their voices roused me from the vision. I gasped for breath and looked around, searching for the source of the song. There, beneath that wave, a mess of hair that looked like stray seaweed. Red eyes bright as rubies lost to the ocean peered up at me from behind dark green seaweed hair. I lost my breath again staring into those eyes that I had seen such life, love, and fire behind. My heart began to pound, alerting me to its presence after such a long time doubting its existence or authenticity. I was overwhelmed. The island began to fade away fast as the wind took to the sails. I shook my head. The answer was the same as it was in the storm.

I climbed onto the railing

and I jumped.

The Captain cried out and Elcho jumped onto the railing, ready to dive in after me but stopped by the Captain's arm.

I laughed all the air in my lungs away as I plummeted to the sea. My feet shot through the surface and tore the way for the rest of me to sink like a stone. I opened my eyes and hers were before me. I held my arms open and she moved herself to me so I could hold onto her as we rushed back to our island. She threw me onto shore and we laughed and screamed and cried together on the beach. I kissed every inch of her face, every kiss an apology. She giggled incessantly like a maiden and told me how happy she was to see me jump off of a ship yet again.

"I love you, Ruby! I would jump off a thousand ships for you. Perhaps only because I know you'll save me, though."

She laughed and held onto my shoulders, a sober look emerging from the sea of excited emotion.

"We love you, too."

"Ruby..." I trailed off, laying my hands onto her stomach.

"Yes! Yes, my mate. I felt the first stirring this morning"

"Ruby," I repeated.

I kissed her, and I made sure to never look back again.