Second Rate Love

It was going to be a theme running through some of my stories within LW of 'You can love two people at the same time. But you have to choose.' But I have decided to make it a series. Sometimes it's the wife, sometimes the husband and even the lover at times. Sometimes it is Love of a person, or a lifestyle. Some are BTB and some RAAC.

Let's see where this one goes.

I got carried away with this one. One event led to another and I had to follow through. If you wish I may tell the husbands side of the story later.

I was at the wedding of the man I loved the most in this world, but it wasn't me he was marrying. I was standing at the back of the Registry Office; I hadn't been invited; I don't think anyone saw me. I will sneak out before the ceremony finishes.

He should be still married to me, but I fucked up. I got out as they were signing the Registration Book. As I walked away to watch from afar I thought back to how I got in this mess.

It started with Jason at work. He was only a few years younger than me. He was quite good looking, not that my old man, Simon, wasn't good looking. Jason was definitely fitter. Again, not that my old man was shabby, he got a promotion a couple of years ago and was doing mainly office work instead of being out on site and he had put on a little bit of weight despite playing cricket and golf.

Simon and I met during our last year at University. He was doing Structural Engineering, and I was doing Social Sciences. We hit it off straight away, for that last year we were inseparable. We laughed a lot. We made love a lot. And when we graduated Simon got a job in his hometown. I went with him, we moved in together as if it was the most natural thing in the world. Simon worked for a construction firm, and I got a job with an insurance company. When we'd been out of Uni for a year and both of us settled into our jobs Simon asked me to marry him, I said 'Yes' like a shot. I knew him well enough by now and I could see him working up to it. If he hadn't asked me, then next year was a leap year and I was going to ask him.

Jason was married and had two children. Simon and I didn't have any, they just never seemed to come along. We worked hard and we had a good life, nice house, decent cars, lovely holidays and if we needed children, we borrowed them from my brother. Just to remind ourselves how well off we were without them. They were a couple of brats.

Jason and I seemed to hit it off, a little bit of sexual tension. A little spark would jump between us occasionally. I was coming up to my 40th in a year and I've heard things change.

So, when Jason asked me up to lunch one day with a couple of the girls from the office, I went along, it wasn't a personal thing. But it became a regular thing every Wednesday lunchtime, we would all go out to a local pub grab a bite to eat, a glass of wine and chat. I told Simon about it, he didn't seem that bothered, especially when I told him all the girls were there. Then slowly the other girls stopped coming until it was just me and Jason. I don't think I mentioned this to Simon, it didn't seem important at the time.

Simon had met Jason and his wife, Carrie, at some of our company summer parties. He told me he didn't particularly like Jason, but admitted he didn't know why. It sort of took the edge off the last party we went to as Jason and Carrie kept hanging around us, we even gave them a lift home.

Simon's company parties were much more fun, probably because it was hard working builders blowing off a little at the boss's expense. Plus, we got on very well with the finance director, Angela and her husband Joe.

Simon was a wonderful man, he often brought me flowers or surprises, he told me constantly he loved me. Our sex life was great, we did passionate, risky, a little kinky and sometimes rampant sex. And I loved him with all my heart. But Jason was in the back of my mind.

And then one Wednesday Jason surprised me, he bought me a small bunch of flowers, he gave them to me in the pub. He got a serious look on his face, and he said to me,

"Polly, you know I'm very attracted to you, don't you?"

I had noticed it. But I pushed it away. It was the little touches he did for me; he would hold my chair out, hold the door open for me but none of the other girls. I wondered if the girls noticed and that was why they stopped coming. I had to admit I was attracted to him. But I was married, I would never do anything with another man, only my Simon,

But to have an attractive younger man tell me he felt an attraction to me did feel good. But nothing must come of it. He is married with two children. I didn't think Carrie would stand for him cheating. I don't think my husband would forgive me.

Jason and I carried on seeing each other on Wednesday lunch time. He ended up sitting closer, initially I started moving away so there was a distance between us, but eventually I gave in. Because it was nice.

Then one dark winter's evening as we were leaving work Jason caught up to me. I unlocked my car and he opened the door for me. I turned to say thank you to him, as I did that he leaned in and kissed me on the lips. He stuttered. "Sorry, I wanted to do that for a long time." There was a small spark. He didn't sound sorry, but he must have planned that. I was late for work this morning and the car was parked in a dark corner and was away from the prying security cameras.

It did feel good, it had been years since I kissed another man apart from Simon. It gave me a little tingle. I pushed him away, but I must admit, it was only half hearted. "No Jason, stop it, we can't do that." I didn't sound very convincing, even to myself.

"Don't worry." He said. "It's just a kiss."

"Yes, but I know where kisses can lead to, and I can't afford to risk my marriage." Again, I didn't sound very convincing.

I got in the car and drove home, I was all of a tither. Certain parts of my body were tingling.

I'm not sure how I waited till I got to bed. I suggested to Simon an early night. I almost raped him. He asked me what came over me? Normally whilst I never turn sex down unless I'm really ill, I don't normally initiate it, mainly because Simon does first.

Simon kissed me and held me and told me how much he loved me. I started to feel guilty

I saw Jason at work and told him if he did that again I would report him to HR.

He just smiled at me. I didn't think he took my threat seriously. I'm not sure I took it seriously either.

The next Wednesday at lunchtime he asked me if I still wanted to go to the pub. I said 'yes', I needed to clear the air. It didn't go as I expected.

He got drinks and didn't order food. He looked at me and smiled, he had a very engaging smile. I thought he was going to pussyfoot around but he didn't. He came straight out with it.

"Polly, you know I'm very attracted to you. I would like one night with you. Just the one. We're both married. I have two children and Carrie's father made me sign a prenuptial agreement. Carrie and I were a bit older when we got married, I had been around a bit and I'm not sure her father trusts me. But I'm so attracted to you, there is a hole in my life. Would you consider just spending one night with me? It could even be an afternoon."

I just sat there amazed, he was so blatant, he came straight out with it. And bloody hell, I was tempted to say 'yes' there and then. I had been pushing it to the back of my mind, but now Jason came out with it. Yes, I wanted to do it. I can't understand why because I had a loving husband and a nice life so why was I going to risk it. It was at that moment in time I decided I was going to go through with it. I didn't tell Jason. We would have to make it fool proof and not get caught.

I reached across and touched his hand gently, there was a spark between our fingers tips. "Look, we have a spark together, that's nature's way of telling us we should be together."

"I can't cheat on my husband, it would destroy him if he found out."

"It would be the same for me, so we will have to be careful and not get caught. There are ways we can do this. Have you considered asking Simon for an open marriage?"

I was aghast at that, that would never work and there was a chance I would end up divorced for even for suggesting it.

"If we do this, it's just the once. And I am not saying we are. I might take the risk once but not again. We will get too familiar, get caught and ruin two marriages. So yes maybe, but just once."

I think I had just admitted to Jason that I might do it.

We left the pub and Jason didn't come near me all afternoon. Which was unlike him because we had legitimate reasons to discuss problems and topics together. I kept an eye out around the office to see if any of the girls were giving me strange looks, I didn't see any. I felt guilty sometimes when I thought of Jason. I felt my skin flush and I wondered if I was going red and could somebody notice.

I almost raped Simon again when I got home again. That was definitely guilty sex trying to make up to him for something I hadn't done, but something I had thought about doing.

It was the next Wednesday when Jason spoke to me about this one night. And I had been thinking as well. I told Jason that Simon never goes away. I know I would never have an excuse to stay out overnight. My family lived too far away and I'm sure Simon would contact them, so it would have to be in the afternoon.

And saying that I realised I had just agreed to have sex with Jason.

Simon got a lot of love and sex that week. I did a lot of thinking for our next Wednesday get together. It appears Jason had as well.

"No contacting each other by any electronic means, no phone calls, no messages, no texts, nothing. Any planning we've got to do has got to be verbal and we agreed to it at the time. We can arrange times and places. Simon doesn't go away, but Carrie is taking the kids to a zoo in two week's time as part of a school trip. She will be on the bus and she can't just get off.

I told him I had a dentist appointment in two weeks and I might be able to shift it to coincide with Carrie's trip with the children to the zoo.

The plan was foolproof.

Jason and I made sure then we did not change anything around the office. It was quite hard to do.

Simon got even more sex, I had to be careful otherwise he would get suspicious, but just the thought of me and Jason revved me up.

I had told Simon I was going to the dentist at 1:00 for a check up on that Friday and I might take the rest of the afternoon off to do a spot of shopping or just wander around town.

I did go to the dentist. didn't take long. I left my car in the main car park in town, and I got a taxi to Jason's house. The taxi driver dropped me off around the corner as I'd been told. I walked in through the back gate so people wouldn't see a strange woman entering the front of the house.

I barely got into their lounge when Jason was all over me and I was all over him, he was kissing me deeply, I was undoing his shirt, he was undoing my blouse. One hand was fondling my breasts, it was lovely. His other hand delved into my knickers and found my love channel. I was soaking, I had been since I got into the taxi at just the thought of this. I shuddered at his hands. I almost collapsed; he took hold of me. I felt his arms around me and he picked me up and carried me upstairs. He carried me to the spare room, that was the plan. I didn't want to desecrate his marital bed, that would be wrong​​.

It was just sex, there was no passion after the initial kissing, he ate me out down there, he was good, that was my first orgasm. He rammed himself into me, hard. I came again and so did he, it didn't take long. He quickly went soft. I used my mouth to rectify that, and we did it again. I was a little disappointed it was over so soon, but it was good, exciting. We both fell asleep.

Fortunately, I'd set my phone as an alarm. I couldn't be home late. When the alarm went off, I woke up and that was when I realised, I was actually in the main bedroom and in his and Carrie's bed. I felt guilty having sex in Carrie's bed. But it didn't last long, I had things to do. I had to get home and shower before Simon got in.

Then I noticed the missed phone calls and text messages from Simon. There were no voicemails though. Normally Simon leaves a message. He must have been too busy.

Simon regularly phones to check how I got on at the dentist or the doctors, it's like he's concerned about me.

I had to get home and practice putting on a straight face. There would not be any sex tonight if Simon asked. I was completely sated. Jason walked me to the back gate. I gave him a kiss on the cheek as I left. I got into the taxi, I was elated, I had got away with it. The thought crossed my mind, I've done it once, it was so exciting, maybe I could do it again.

I got into my car and there the reality of what I had done hit me, I looked at the passenger seat. Simon sat there. He often drove this car. In that familiar place the guilt got to me. How could I be so stupid as to risk everything. No, never again. It was good, different, exciting, but never again. I had to stop driving and pull over. I had a little cry about what I'd done. That was when I made my mind up. It had been good, but never again. To do it again would increase the risk and if I got caught it would ruin my marriage, my husband and my life. It was a stupid mistake, and one I must never repeat.

Now I had to get home and try to be normal and put it all behind me. Sex was back on the cards if Simon wanted it. Forget about it, it was a totally stupid thing to have done.

I pulled myself together, dried my tears and drove the rest of the way home. I got in before Simon, that was good. I had a long hot shower to try to wash the guilt off. As I got out, I looked at the clock. Simon should be home by now, he always phones if he is going to be late and he hadn't, what was wrong? Then I heard the front door slam, not close, slam.

I rushed downstairs, still with the towel wrapped around me. Simon was there looking like thunder, had he crashed the car, had something gone wrong at work, had one of the men got hurt?

"Darling, what's wrong?"

"How long have you been fucking Jason Wright?"

The next thing I remember was being shocked awake. Simon had thrown cold water in my face. I was still laying on the floor. I must have fainted.

He didn't let up. "Well, how long?" I was still on the floor.

"Just once, just today. Honestly believe me." I was shocked beyond tears.

His answer was simple. "No." Then he added. "Why should I believe you?"

He went and sat down at the kitchen table. I got up off the floor, he didn't help me. Simon helps me with everything. Now the tears started. He had his phone on the table.

He repeated himself, he really must have wanted answers. "How long have you been fucking Jason Wright?"

"Just once, today, really..." I wanted to carry on, but he held his hand up.

"Where?"

"His house, he wanted to come here I wouldn't let him. I went to his house."

"Whereabouts in his house?"

"Their bed, I didn't want to, it's dis..." He held his hand up, cutting me off again.

"Where is Carrie?"

"She's on a school trip with their children to the Zoo." The mention of her children struck me.

Then Simon did something completely unexpected, he hadn't even asked me why?

He pushed some buttons on his phone, it rang, and it was answered.

"Hello. Is this Carrie Wright?" I could hear the noise of children in the background, she was on speaker phone. Oh no, he wasn't going to, was he?

"Yes, who are you and what can I do for you?"

"I am Simon Rutherford, we met at your husband's work party. We gave you a lift home last year. I have some news for you. May I suggest you come off speaker phone."

It went quieter, but you could still hear the children in the background. "Ok, yes I remember you. Hi, what can I do for you?"

"Can you answer me a question first?" He didn't wait for a reply. "Do you have an open marriage?"

There was a spluttering on the other end of the phone. "No, of course not, why?"

"Then can you explain why my wife was having sex in your house, in your bed with your husband this afternoon?"

She shouted. "The bastard, I warned him. Never again. Do you have proof?"

It went very quiet in the background. Simon did something with his phone and I heard my voice with the words I had just said only a few minutes ago repeat that I'd had sex with Jason in his house and their marital bed.

"The fucking bastard, I will do for him this time." There was crying on the other end of the phone and all we heard was another voice saying. "Carrie, Carrie what's up..." and the phone went dead.

I just sat there dumbfounded, my husband had just destroyed someone's life. Well, I suppose I had a hand in it too.

He looked down and said quietly. "It's better she finds out now, at least she has friends around her." He looked at me. "Unlike me when I found out my wife was cheating on me. I was all alone." He paused for a bit. "Looks like you're not his first either, you can go and join the long queue of other sluts he has cheated with."

He put the kettle on for tea, got the pot ready, but only one cup. Shit. Then I heard him swear, he turned the kettle off and got himself a beer. Nothing for me. He sat back down opposite me.

"Why?"

"I don't know."

"Bollocks, you had to plan this, so there must be a reason. It doesn't just happen."

"It was the excitement."

"Was he better than me?"

"No, just different, there was no love. It was just sex."

"Did he make you come?"

"Yes, but there was no kissing." Almost as if that made it better, I was desperate.

"I need to think. You'd better get dressed and go."

"Go where, where can I go?"

He looked at me. "I don't care, your Mum or your Dads, your brother. A hotel. I don't care, just get out to give me time to think."

I just sat there not knowing what to do, I couldn't think straight. I couldn't go to my family, they would ask why. I could lie, but if they found out later, I would be in more trouble. It had to be a hotel. I needed to keep this from the family if at all possible. My Dad had cheated on my Mum, that is why they are not together anymore. I was young at the time, so it didn't affect me a lot. I found out later, my older brother much more, he hated our Dad for what he did to our family. I realised this was all my fault.

I didn't want to upset him any more than I had, I suggested I sleep on the sofa.

Simon shouted at me. "Get out before I do something I regret."

I stood my ground. Even through the tears. "Look I messed up, I know. I will leave if you promise we can meet tomorrow to try to sort this mess out."

He was angry at me, but I had seen him do this in the past. He pulled himself up as if considering something. "Okay, the sooner we sort this shit out the better, but for now just get out."

I was still in a towel, I went upstairs, still crying. I started packing an overnight bag. I wouldn't need much, but I tried to hang it out as long as possible, just in case he came round. I was sitting on the bed crying when I heard the floorboards creak. I looked up and he was standing in the doorway, I thought he was going to say something. But he just shook his head and walked away, I could see tears in his eyes. I slowly got dressed and I had put a few things together in a bag when there was an almighty crash at the front door and lots of shouting. I couldn't hear what was being shouted, but someone was very angry.

I rushed downstairs and Simon was on the phone, I heard him say, calmly. "Police please." There was a pause. "I have someone trying to break into my house and they are very violent."

He paused again. "If he breaks in, I will defend myself." Another pause. "Yes, I will stay on the line." With that Simon put the phone on speakerphone and by the way he stood it up by a stack of books I'm assuming he's put the video on.