Shadow Dagger Ch. 14

"I worry about that, though" Evelyn admitted.

"Why?" Reynar asked, confused.

Evelyn searched for the right words to explain what she felt. "I met a servant here who shares my name. I never knew I was so famous here in the city. Now...they're about to find out that the soul-mate in those stories has died and I'm already marrying someone else."

Reynar shook his head immediately. "I think you're overlooking something very important; I am the king. The people will be captured by this new revelation, trust me. You will be even more well known, if anything."

Evelyn was simply dumbfounded. She had never thought about it from that angle. She knew, instinctively, that Reynar was right. "I finally understand that the stories of you, King Reynar, have not been exaggerated. Youtruly are the most intelligent man alive today."

Reynar smiled warmly at her. "Thank you for the compliment. Whether it's true or not, I don't know."

He really did have a warm smile, Evelyn had to admit. Maybe in another time and place she might have fallen for him. The thought struck her with a sudden feeling of pity. This man deserved more. "Aren't you sad?"

Reynar frowned at her. "Why would I be sad?"

"You're about to marry a woman who doesn't love you and who has just lost her soul-mate. Not only that, but she's also pregnant with her husband's child; a child you will claim for your own, thereby insuring that the line of Lobare dies with you."

"I've thought about that," he replied quietly. "Your child will be the future of this world. I'm not worried about continuing my line."

He sighed and stood up. He walked slowly over to the large windows. Evelyn got up and joined him. Neither one spoke for several minutes. Evelyn stared up at the night sky and wondered if the God truly had a plan for all of them.

"I was in love once," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. He continued to stare out the window, as though his memories were etched upon the glass. "She was one of my instructors in the Emporium. I use to pray to the God every night that I be allowed to spend another day at the Emporium. I hoped, deep down, that I never had to take up the throne."

Evelyn glanced up at him. His dark face showed no emotion, but Evelyn could see the slight muscle twitches in his jaw. She knew he was really fighting to hold back his emotions.

"But of course, it was a hopeless wish. My father died a death I don't envy. I saw just how powerful love was as I watched him waste away from heartbreak. It...frightened me. So when I became king, I cut off all contact with her. It was the best thing for both of us."

Evelyn touched him gently on the arm. "She was a Magi; you could have married her and made her queen."

Reynar smiled down at her from his great height. "I could have, if this was a bard's song. There was no political advantage to be gained from marrying her. It would have never been allowed. My father was granted special permission to marry my mother. Everyone wanted that first war with Raves to end."

She paused, thinking over something he had just said. "If your mother was a non-Magi, then how is it you are a Magi? Shouldn't you have been a Magi Victus?"

"I love your keen wit," he said, smiling. "Yes, I would have been born a Magi Victus...if my mother had been a non-Magi."

Evelyn's eyes widened. "Are you implying what I think you're implying?"

He looked down at her. "I'm trusting you with a great secret. You deserve to know, seeing how you're about to become queen. Do you remember how I told you that Jocelyn gave her book to the family who had the blood of Oracles in their veins?"

"Yes," Evelyn said slowing. She thought she knew where he was going with this.

"Well, I sort of left out a key piece of information. The family she left the book to washer family. In the desert, the goddess rules because her family are Magi."

"There are Magi among the desert people?" Evelyn asked faintly.So many secrets!

"The tribes have no idea. It's a very dark secret. Only the goddess and her children know. When the goddess' daughter becomes a woman, she is sent to Astuari to seduce a Magi in order to get pregnant. As you know, many Magi men are susceptible to the charms of a non-Magi woman. My father was informed of this secret and he agreed to marry one of the goddess' daughters."

"But I haven't heard any of this!" Evelyn tried to get a grasp on yet another secret. What wasn't she ever told?

"Nobody knew she was my real mother," Reynar replied. "The Magi were led to believe that my mother was a Magi by the name of Solia Geris."

"I think I recall that name," Evelyn said, frowning thoughtfully.

"This was before your time so I'm not surprised that you don't really know who she is. My father took her into his service as a personal counselor, a position beyond that of the Magi council. Most Magi, however, thought he had taken her as a mistress so that the line of Lobare would be preserved. She was pregnant at the same time as my real mother, though not by my father. She was dark skinned but not as dark as my mother. Still, it was enough to pass casual observation. She was loyal to my father and kept the secret faithfully until the day she died."

"Was all this subterfuge necessary?" Evelyn asked as she massaged her head. Nothing was making sense anymore.Daminus, I miss our old life so much. I just want to be in your arms right now.

"Quite necessary," Reynar assured her. "The goddess had a vision of how this world would be saved. She knew that the next king of Astuari would have to be born from her blood. The vision showed her that this king would be very talented, which would be needed at this ending time. That king was me."

"How far back does this go?" Evelyn asked in utter disbelief.

Reynar chuckled. "I often wonder that myself. How many things must have happened to bring all this about? How hard was it to keep it secret? I know it killed my father to keep the secret safe. He loved my mother very much and it pained him to make people think she was just a woman he married for political purposes. Did you know that, growing up, I had to pretend that Solia was my real mother?"

"I can't imagine," Evelyn said, shaking her head. "Your poor mother couldn't even publicly acknowledge her own son. She had to go through so much, didn't she?"

"Yes," Reynar said quietly. He was silent for a moment as he stared off into the distance. He shook his head. "This, I think, is the last secret I have kept from you. I hope you see why it's necessary."

"I can't take any more secrets," Evelyn muttered.What can't I just live a normal life? What couldn't I have grown old with Daminus? She needed to change the subject before the grief could come back. "We were talking about your lost love, weren't we?"

"Sorry," Reynar chuckled. "I get carried away when I can finally reveal my secrets. I hope I haven't confused you. It's confusing to me, sometimes. I have so many secrets."

"Being King must be so complicated. I don't envy you," Evelyn said, shaking her head. "Your life is bound by so many rules and restrictions. I wish you could have had your love. I wish you didn't have the weight of the world on your shoulders."

"Thanks," he muttered. "But I think I did the right thing. I don't want to ever end up like my father. I need to be strong for what's about to come. Love, at this time, would weaken me."

"Love doesn't weaken you; it strengthens you." Evelyn smiled sadly; that was one of Daminus' favorite sayings.

"I guess I will never know," Reynar lamented. "She died, you know, in the War of the Desert. A lot of Magi died in that war." He shook his head sadly and ran his hand through his thick, dark hair. "It's getting late Evelyn. Why don't you go to bed? The God knows I dumped a lot of information on you tonight. It's going to take you a while to process everything."

Evelyn squeezed his arm. "I'm sorry that you lost her. Goodnight, my liege."

"Evelyn," he said, grabbing her wrist and looking seriously into her eyes. "Be prepared; by this time tomorrow the whole city will know about our wedding."

"I'll be ready," she said, much more confidently than she felt. She honestly didn't know if she would ever be ready.

"Goodnight, Evelyn," Reynar said, releasing her wrist. He turned back to the window.

Evelyn stopped by the door and looked back at him. There was something sad about the way he was standing; she could almost see the pressure that was bowing his shoulders. With one last pitying look, she slipped out the door.

***

Ashford nearly sighed in relief when Jon slowed the horses down. Then again, he almost groaned when he realized it would be his turn shortly. Jon's silver-filled eyes turn slowly back to his normal ice-blue stare. He wiped his forehead and sat back against the bench.

"How're the horses?" Ashford asked, trying to delay the moment when he would have to take over.

"They're perfectly fine. It's my energy they're using, after all. And you know the spell protects their bodies from the wear-and-tear of running for so long."

"It's a good spell," Ashford admitted.And an incredibly hard one to learn! It doesn't help when Jon makes it look so easy.

Jon seemed to know what he was thinking. "You're getting better. I know the magic is hard to grasp, but you have a keen mind and plenty of mental stamina."

Ashford was glad it was nighttime; the darkness hid his blush. Jon didn't often throw praise his way. But when he did, it was enough to make Ashford swell with pride.And he knows it, too. Whether he wants to admit it or not, he's an excellent teacher. I wish he had taught me when I was growing up in the Emporium. I could have been Grand Master by now!

They listened to the crickets as the cart plodded along at a speed barely faster than a trot. Ashford was very familiar with the landscape from his many trips to the desert. He was simply amazed at how far they had come in just one day. Normally, it would have taken him three days of hard riding to get to this point.

Ashford saw the reigns in Jon's hands twitch as he prepared to hand them over. Ashford quickly searched his mind for something that would distract him. His first thought was the conversation they had left unfinished when they had camped earlier in the day. "So, Sophina really is in love with Evelyn, eh?"

Jon glanced at him sideways. "You don't still think I want her, do you?"

"No," Ashford said quickly. "I didn't really get that impression. Besides, didn't you tell me you were thinking about another woman? Sarah, wasn't it?"

Ashford immediately regretted bringing this up when he saw Jon's hands tighten on the reigns. However, when he spoke, his voice was quite calm. "Sarah was my wife."

"She's died, didn't she?" Ashford asked delicately.

"Obviously," Jon replied, as he continued to stare straight ahead.

Ashford hesitated. Jon was giving curt answers but he also wasn't telling Ashford to drop the subject. And, against his better judgment, Ashford was rather curious. He couldn't imagine the famous assassin being in love. "Tell me about her."

Jon turned his head and stared intently at Ashford. "Why?"

Ashford glanced away from that stare and shrugged his shoulders. "What else are we going to talk about?"

It appeared that Jon would rather not talk at all, as he just continued to drive the cart. Ashford was just about to offer to take over the reigns when Jon suddenly spoke. "She was the most beautiful woman I ever met. I knew I wanted to be with her when I was just a kid. We grew up together and were apprenticed to the same Order member. She was so much smarter than I was," he added, shaking his head.

"That's not possible," Ashford said, amazed. "You're the smartest person I know! And I was best friends with King Reynar!"

"She was smarter," Jon said, nodding his head absently. "The spell I used on the horses I learned from her. Our master highly disapproved of using spells on animals. She figured it out, though. She was always like that. I can't remember how many spells she invented on her own."

"Could she have killed you? You know, in a duel?"

"Probably," Jon admitted. "To be honest, I did advance quite a bit in the years before her death. But I didn't love her because of her power. She was the most generous and kind person you would ever meet. I felt like a better man because she loved me. I felt special."

Ashford heard the bitterness in Jon's voice but didn't remark on it. Ashford knew a thing or two about leaving demons in the past. "Did you marry her?"

"Yes. The decision almost cost me my life, however. My father, when he and the rest of the Order were actually around, strictly forbade me to marry her."

"I see," Ashford said, nodding. "It was because the God had commanded the Magi to mate only with non-Magi, right?"

"My father probably felt guilty that he had gone against the God's wishes by marrying another Order member. This refusal to let me marry Sarah was probably his last effort to live by the God's commands. The Order had lost most of their humanity by this time. My father must have clung to this last shred of humanity," Jon finished quietly.

"But you married her anyways?"

Jon nodded sadly. "I think that was what finally killed the humanity within my father. He had completely failed in his duties. Not long after, the Order disappeared for good. But I didn't care; I had my Sarah. Then after a few years, we had our little Mathus."

"Mathus?" Ashford asked, confused. "I thought you said your son's name was Tomar?"

Jon grimaced. "He changed his name years later."

"Why?"

Jon shook his head. "It doesn't matter. I...I'm done talking about this. And don't think I don't know what you're doing. It's your turn to drive the cart."

Ashford groaned as Jon pulled the cart over to the side of the dirt road they were traveling on. Jon hopped down and Ashford slide across the bench and took up the reigns. Jon walked around the cart and hopped onto the bench where Ashford was just sitting.

"You need the practice," Jon said. "Now, remember what I taught you. Organic Manipulation spells have to be modified based on the physiology of the species of animal you are casting the spell on. Do you remember the incantation and manipulation needed?"

Ashford didn't bother answering. He opened himself up to the magic and chanted the spell out loud. His fingers danced in the air as he shaped his words into being. Runes formed in the air in front of him and floated down onto the horses. The horses nickered and pawed the ground restlessly.

"Not bad," Jon admitted. "Though that manipulation would be better used on goats. Still, the spell will work well enough."

Goats? How does this man know that? Shaking his head, Ashford snapped the reigns and held on tight as the horses thundered into the night.

Ashford led the horses down the narrow dirt road. He was familiar with the surrounding countryside but he had never traveled down this road before. He always stuck to the main road. Still, he was reasonably confident of where he was at. Off to his right, the Forest of Autumn stretched as far as the eye could see. Judging by their current pace, they would pass the edge of the forest by tomorrow. The land would then gradually change from lush green vegetation to sparse grass. The sparseness of the countryside would then gave way to sand and dirt and the oppressive heat of the desert.

Jon's head was nodding up and down on his chest as the cart continued to thunder on. The sun was just cresting the horizon, casting it's reddish glow on the world, when Jon's head snapped up. "That's good for today," he told Ashford.

Ashford let go of his magic with relief. He slowed the horses down and led them to the forest, as they had done the night before. Once they stopped, he jumped down and stretched his back. He saw to the horses while Jon began to make their supper.

"I'm sorry for all this," Ashford whispered to the horses, as he rubbed them down.

The horse nearest to him nickered softly and bumped its head into his side. Ashford chuckled and patted the horse on the head. He slipped feed bags over their mouths before taking the tent out of the cart.

He was just hammering the pegs into the ground with a mallet when Jon spoke suddenly. "Have you ever been in love?" he asked, as he stirred the pot that hung over the fire. "You're 200 years old and you've never married. I was just wondering."

Ashford set the mallet down on the grass and looked over at Jon.What a peculiar question. "No, never been married," Ashford replied, shaking his head ruefully. "I've been with my fair share of women, mind you. The Magi, as you probably know, aren't nearly so prudish when it comes to sex. After all, we have a very limited selection to chose from. So we tend to have some fun before we settle down."

"I see you never settled down," Jon said, smirking.

Ashford laughed. "Yeah, I guess I haven't. I just haven't met the right woman, that's all. So I might as well keep having my fun," he added, winking over at Jon.

Jon shook his head and chuckled. "What about Sophina then? I've seen the way you look at her."

Ashford felt his good humor fade. "I'm not going to lie; I did start to develop some strong feelings for her. She's quite unlike any of the women I've ever know. She's feisty, you know?"

"I know," Jon said quietly. "She reminds me a lot of Sarah, to be honest."

Ashford held his breath, hoping Jon would continue his story from where he left off. Jon stirred the stew absently, his gaze looking beyond the fire. "In what way?" Ashford asked carefully.

"They're both fighters," Jon replied, his gaze still locked on the fire. "They're both graceful when they fight. Sarah could weave her magic like it was a dance. I use to love watching her fight."

Ashford said nothing. He knew if he said anything he would snap Jon out of his trance. Jon continued. "Even in my anger and grief, I still thought she was beautiful when she saved my life. I hated her for that; for letting me live. It would have been the end of my pain. But I've had to carry it around for all these years. I think that was why I hated her so."

Ashford heard the great pain in Jon's voice. He suddenly knew this is why Jon had told them earlier that he was broken. Sarah had somehow betrayed Jon and broken his heart. Ashford wasn't sure if he wanted to hear anymore, but his curiosity was still very strong. "You hated her?" he asked, when he knew Jon wouldn't continue without prodding.

Jon looked up suddenly and stared shrewdly at Ashford. "Why are asking me about her? Does my pain entertain you?"

Ashford shook his head, horrified. "No! Why would you ask that? I just want to know more about you, that's all. I want to understand you."

Jon stirred the stew vigorously. "It's done," he said.

Ashford nearly sighed. He knew he wouldn't get anymore out of Jon this night. "Good, I'm hungry."

They were silent for a time as they settled in to eat. "We're making good time," Jon said, around a mouthful of stew.

"I would've never thought it possible," Ashford replied, shaking his head. "We'll be in the desert in a couple of days."

"Then we'll get our answers," Jon said quietly, as he stared off into the distance.

"What do you think we're going to find?"

Jon chewed his stew thoughtfully before answering. "I'm not entirely sure yet. But I do have my suspicions."

"And those are...?" Ashford asked.

Jon shook his head. "I don't want to say just yet. I want to see how it goes first. What do you think we're going to find there? What do you know about this goddess?"

Ashford hesitated.Why am I keeping this secret? Reynar already betrayed me. Putting aside his bowl of stew, Ashford faced Jon squarely. "I didn't tell you the entire truth about Reynar's history. I've kept his secret for so long it just became second nature. I'm sorry."