Sticking My Nose In

"If you married a man who is so totally dependent on drugs to remain alive and you deprive him of that drug and he died, who would think of looking for the lack of drugs in his system as opposed to the presence of drugs? Especially if it was commonly known that she was sexually voracious, there's no law against screwing your husband to death, he wasn't about to complain."

"If this is the case, she is guilty of murder." Chandra said thoughtfully.

"If this is the case, then it's up to someone to prove it."

"Any suggestions on how to go about that?"

"You're the expert, I know nothing of laws." Typical of Sydney, start a rumour and then leave it hanging.

"Well, that puts paid to my plans for the day." Chandra said.

"What plans?" I asked.

"I had every intention of you taking me home with you," She said, kissing me, "and us test driving your bed, that is after I've spoken to someone about repairing the damage we did to mine last night."

I was just about to say something, but while I was still thinking of something suitable, Sydney beat me to it. "I've just about had it to here," hand above head to indicate the level of had-it-ness, "this pollution of the ambience of this business with your hetero carryings-on."

"Get used to it." Chandra said.

"So, what are we going to do now?" I asked.

"I am going to work to discuss this with my bosses," She looked at me to gauge my expression, "You are quite at liberty to join me," my new expression must have been the one she was looking for, "in fact I insist on you coming with me, I want to show my new man off to the office staff."

"Get out of my sight." Sydney said with mock severity.

 We got.

The legal practice of Chambers, Hallston and Associates occupied a suite of offices in a building overrun with similar legal entities in similar offices. We attracted attention as we entered, "Is his Lordship in his office?" Chandra asked Michelle, the Receptionist.

"Yes, go right in." She pushed the intercom button, "Chandra is back, but not alone."

We walked forever until we reached a door marked 'Gareth Chambers'. Chandra tapped on the door but didn't wait to be invited into the office. Felicia, the very decorative Executive Assistant waved us through. "Ah, Chandra, mission accomplished?"

"Yes, we have information that we feel needs to be acted upon."

"First things first, introduce me to the other participant in the 'we' scenario."

"Gareth, this is Stefan Baptiste, and before you embarrass yourself by launching into your version of French, he's as Ocker as they come, doesn't speak a word of French. This is the hero that rescued me from being raped by that oaf Wayne yesterday."

"I'm obliged, Stefan. Chandra has been regaling us with your heroics since she got to work this morning. How do you fit into this picture?"

"I am an Interior Design Consultant. Our firm was hired to carry out renovations on the Tomlinson property prior to its sale by the grieving widow."

"So, you've lost a commission then."

"It would seem so."

"That's not the interesting part of the story," Chandra said. "While we were discussing this turn of events with Stefan's business partner, Sydney, he tossed a thought into the mix. It seems that, in a previous incarnation, Jacinta Tomlinson was a Pharmacist. He suggested that we should suggest to the police that they take a closer look at the deaths of her husband, and her previous husbands, on the basis of an absence of drugs in their systems. If she was, in her professional capacity, responsible for administering the drugs needed to keep her husbands alive but, was instead administering placebos, this would hasten their demise and there would be no trace of drugs in their system. She would have murdered them by denying them the drugs they needed to survive,"

"That's all well and good, but how can we prove this? We can't ask for an exhumation order based on conjecture."

"What's the time?" I looked at my watch. "I have time before she gets home, I could have a poke around to see what I can find."

"Two heads are better than one, or four eyes are better than two. I'm coming with you." Chandra said.

"Keep your minds on the job." We were ordered.

"Whatever does he think we're going to be doing?"

Chandra asked sarcastically out loud as we headed for the door.

"I haven't a clue." I replied.

We had conducted a fruitless search and were just about to leave when a truck pulled up. A guy approached the door. "Are you the Interior Designer?" He asked.

"Yes, and who are you?"

"We have been asked to clear the contents of the basement."

"I wasn't even aware that there was a basement, although I'm sure that I would have found it eventually."

"Apparently the entrance is in the garage and you have a key for it among the keys that she gave you."

I opened the garage doors and found the door to the basement in the back corner. One of the keys fitted the lock so the door was opened. I hit the light switch that was beside the door, and we all walked down the stairs. There was a pile of packing boxes in the centre of the room, some storage cupboards and a workbench.

"I'll just go and get my mate and we'll make a start." He left.

"Quick, let's have a look." Chandra took a nail file from her purse and it was sufficient to slice the packaging tape on one of the boxes. "Look at this." The box contained laboratory equipment.

"I wonder what's in the other boxes? If there is equipment for the manufacturing of pills or capsules, then we need to make sure that they are not removed."

"Leave that to me." The workmen came down the stairs, but before they could remove any boxes, Chandra stepped in. "I have to inform you that you cannot remove these boxes." She took an official-looking document from her bag. I assumed that it was the one she was carrying when she arrived this morning. "I have here, a document that places a moratorium on the removal of any furnishings or articles from these premises."

"What are you talking about? We have our orders to remove all of the contents of this basement."

"I have to inform you that those orders were issued by a person not authorised to do so. This house and the entirety of its contents, apart from the personal belongings of Mrs Tomlinson, are the property of the new owners."

"That's news to us, we were under the impression that this house has not yet been sold."

"Then I suggest that you contact Mrs Tomlinson and clarify the situation."

"Guess who's going to have a hissy fit? That document doesn't say anything about her not removing any property, does it?"

"No, but it soon will." She took out her phone and was soon talking to her boss. "How soon can you get the police here? We've found something interesting that seems to confirm Sydney's theory. There's a basement and some guys rocked up to remove the contents. We need to prevent that." She placed her hand over the phone mike, "He's calling the cops." Back to the phone, "Ten minutes, that should be quick enough. If she calls we will tell her some bullshit story that'll have her on the phone to her lawyer. You need to get someone over here with some authentic papers just in case she arrives."

"Are you just a Paralegal?"

"Yes, but my boss is also my father."

"Oh." I left it at that.

"Is that going to cause a problem?"

"No. I was just deafened by the sound of this all coming together. I thought that you and he were pretty familiar, now I know why."

"You didn't think..."

"No, of course not."

"I'll have you know that I'm positively puritanic when it comes to relationships, one at a time and no close relatives."

"I'm glad to hear that." I kissed her and things were just beginning to get interesting when a car pulled up out front, marginally ahead of the car containing Jacinta. Gareth was in the first car, why he came in person was something that I would have to ask him.

A welcoming committee of now three was waiting for her when she got out of her car. "What the fuck is this all about?" Whatever happened to that dignified person that I have been dealing with for years?

"What is happening is that we have a document stating that you are not the rightful owner of this property."

"What bullshit is this?" She was getting a tad upset.

"Your late husband changed his Will and left this property and its contents to the National Trust. We had hoped to serve you with the papers this morning but you had left. Our representative spoke with your Interior Designer, informing him that he was not to interfere in any way with this building, pursuant to the provisions of its Heritage Listed status."

"We'll see about that!" She frantically worked the keypad of her phone. "Get you arse over his this instant, we have a problem, it seems as if the bastard has left the house and its contents to the National Trust. How the fuck did that manage to get past your search?" She didn't wait for a reply.

She had just reached her car when a police car pulled in front of her. "Mrs Tomlinson?"

"Yes."

"I have here a warrant to search this property." He handed her the warrant.

"I think that you should look in the basement." Chandra said, pointing to the door leading downstairs.

"There's nothing down there." Jacinta said, fear in her voice.

"Then it won't take long." It didn't take long before he emerged. "There's a little more than nothing down there. Constable call for a van, will you."

"Yes Sir."

Jacinta headed for her car. "Excuse me, Mrs Tomlinson, I must ask that you do not leave, I need to ask you a few questions concerning the contents of those boxes in the basement."

"I know nothing about them, in fact, I didn't even know of the existence of that basement. My husband never told me that there was a basement."

"Be that as it may, I'll still need to ask you some questions. If you leave now I will have to take out a warrant for your arrest."

"Am I under arrest, if so what are the charges?"

"You are not under arrest at this time, but to leave now could be seen as you having something to hide."

With a loud exhalation, she sulked back into the garage.

While waiting for the van, the Constable began to bring the packing boxes up from the basement, stacking them neatly in the centre of the garage.

"Okay, spill, what made you look into the basement? Surely you would not normally have worried about that and you were probably only supposed to tart up the main areas of the house." The sergeant asked.

"Firstly, I resent the implication that I was about to 'tart up' this house, we do not do cheap makeovers. Secondly, it was my business partner that hinted that there was more to her conveniently marrying rich old men who were dependant on medication to survive and them succumbing to their medical condition not long after she married them. He suggested that, while she was alleged to have been sexually voracious that, in itself, was not enough to cause their rapid decline and eventual death. He suggested that she helped the process along."

"In what way?"

"What if she, in her former role as a Pharmacist, had a machine to manufacture pills or capsules. She could produce placebos that looked exactly like the real medication. Now she would be smart enough to know that, if she were to immediately swap the placebos for the real deal, the sudden physical downturn would raise questions, so she would gradually substitute the one for the other."

"You have a devious mind," Chandra said, "I see that I'll have to watch you. You aren't on any life-prolonging medication, are you?"

"No."

"Then you have nothing to worry about."

"I was never worried, you don't strike me as that sort of person."

"I will never strike you as anything."

"Would you two stop this inane chatter," Gareth said to break up the flow of banalities. "If you have nothing better to do," He looked at Chandra, "You should head back to the office and finish off that brief that you were working on."

"Spoilsport. I can think of something that's better than staying here, and better than working on that brief." She looked at me, I knew exactly what she was thinking of'

"I have nothing to do now that I'm no longer able to continue with this assignment."

"That's it then, we both have something to do that is better than anything else."

"Get out of my sight, both of you, this is sick-making."

"Stefan, a word to the wise," Gareth said as we started up the driveway, "You had better stamp your authority on this relationship, you are at best an equal partner in this, anything less than that will lead to disaster."

"What was that all about?" I asked Chandra as we got into my car.

"He thinks that he rules the roost, little does he know that my mother allows him to believe that when it is she, that is the dominant partner."

"I think it important for you to know that there will be no dominant partner in our relationship."

"Believe that if you will," she saw the look on my face, "Oh, alright, I promise that there will be no domination by either of us."

"Let me see your hands." 

"Why?"

"I want to see if you had your fingers crossed." She held up her hands.

"I'll have to call Sydney and let him know that I will be otherwise engaged." I used my car's Bluetooth phone and was soon talking to him. "I have nothing else scheduled for today, I am taking the rest of it off."

"There you go, flaunting your virility, go, and don't show your face here again until you have shagged yourself to exhaustion."

"Do I complain about you flaunting your dirty weekends away with your husbands?" There was no response. "I seem to recall," I said to Chandra, "that this morning we discussed something about giving my bed a workout." I said, just to rub salt into his wounded dignity.

Sometime during the afternoon, while idly running my finger towards her pussy, I paused. "Chandra, my... love... I've been thinking..."

"There you go, wasting good loving time."

"I'm serious, there is a small matter of birth control. We seem to have given no thought as to the matter."

"I'll put your mind at ease, I am on the pill, have been for years. I decided long ago that the decision on when and with whom I embark on parenthood would be mine and the prospective father's. Sometime in the not too distant future, I intend to raise the topic with you."

"I'm honoured and pleased. Where was I? Oh yes." We resumed where we had left off, it was nothing if not perfect in every way. I have never been so in tune to the needs of a woman as I am now. 

A halt was called as the light faded outside the window. "Wait here." I ordered.

"Where are you going?" She asked as I slipped on a robe.

"To feed my bride to be." I left before she could respond.

I'd like to brag that I could whip up a gourmet meal at the drop of the had, but I'd be lying. I nuked a container of a Rogan Josh that I had frozen about a month ago and put some Basmati rice into my rice cooker. The curry would stand for a time while the rice was cooking. I placed some oil in a pan and fried some Poppadoms and made some side dishes to cool the palate if the curry was too spicy. When completed I carried the meal into my bedroom and placed the tray between us.

"I suppose that you're going to tell me that you whipped this meal up all by yourself." She took a small quantity of the curry and put it in her mouth.

"I did make this myself. The curry was in the freezer and all I had to do was to nuke it. The rest I cooked just now."

"This is as good as I'd expect from a genuine Indian restaurant. Aren't you the clever person?"

"I can't take all the credit. I had an Indian girlfriend while at Uni and she taught me how to make authentic curries."

"If I ever get to meet her, remind me to thank her."

"That will not be possible, she is no longer with me she had to return home to India. If she had not her family would lose face in their village. The villagers had a whip-around to help pay for her tuition, she is honour bound to repay that debt to the villagers."

"Are you still in contact with her?"

"I get a Christmas card from her each year. The last one was to be the last."

"Why?"

"She is to marry a doctor, while she doesn't love him, she is interested in helping him with his work, and to do that her family insisted that they should be married."

"How sad for her. If my parents insisted on me marrying a man that I don't like I would not accept their decision."

"Even if the chosen man was to be me?"

"Ah, now that would be different. How is it that you have managed to avoid the predatory clutches of a woman up until now?"

"I guess I was, sort of hoping that Khumlah and I would get together."

"So, I'm a rebound fuck, am I?"

"No. She and I never made love, something to do with her religion."

"Thank God for her religion. Now, where were we?" She placed the tray on the floor and turned to me. I could get used to all of this attention.

I was kissing Chandra goodbye outside her office when Gareth tapped on the window, putting a stop to the moment. I pushed the button to wind the window down. 

"Sorry to break this up, Stefan, a word if you will."

We followed him inside. 

"No calls until I tell you." He instructed the receptionist. In his office, he placed his attache case on the desk. "I have been having a very interesting conversation with the police. It seems as if your Sydney hit the nail on the head. Mrs Tomlinson has been a very naughty girl, well, not a girl, but you know what I mean."

"So she has been substituting placebos for prescribed medications?"

"Yes, it seems as if she has made a career of it."

"How could she have got away with it for so long?"

"She abides by the rule of keeping the customer satisfied. If they're happy they are less likely to complain, even if they know that something is wrong. She was able to convince them that the problem is that they were building up a tolerance to the medication making it less effective."

"Why wouldn't they go to their doctor to up the dosage of the medication?"

"It wouldn't have mattered if they did, she would simply phase out the new dosage and return to the placebo."

"So, what can be done about this?"

"The police have gone back through the records of her previous marriages and contacted the doctors in question. They will be interviewing them all over the next day or so."

"I've got to be getting to work before Sydney gets all bitchy and fires me."

I arrived just ten minutes after I should have arrived, thanks to some creative driving. "Well, what is happening on the Jacinta front? I assume that we no longer have a contract?"

"We no longer have a contract." While driving here a thought crossed my mind. I know that it isn't PC to generalise, but rumours seem to spread quicker and further in the gay community. "Sydney," I said thoughtfully, "You seem to have your finger on the pulse, what do you know of the lovely Jacinta?"

"Well, I'm not one to spread gossip, but I have heard that she bats for both teams, one for business, the other for pleasure. She's not in this on her own you know."

"What do you mean?"

"Her business and serious bed partner is a lawyer. It was she that came up with this money-making scheme. It is she who keeps tabs on the operation to ensure that it doesn't run foul of the law."

"I'm surprised that they didn't foresee this latest development that has the potential to bring this whole thing undone."

"I think that they underestimated the mental strength of Mister Tomlinson, or maybe he was forewarned."

"Whatever, how do you see this playing out, does Jacinta's partner throw her under the bus and cut and run before she's implicated, or do they tough it out?"

"They'll tough it out, at least until it comes to trial. Plan B will probably be to set Jacinta up with a fake ID and get her out of the country to start again somewhere."