Stray Cats Ch. 03

"It's a huge step," he murmured leaning forward to kiss her neck, softly.

"It's not like I can just change my mind and get a refund if things don't work out," she said as she reached up to caress his cheek. "This is all very scary."

She turned around again and settled against his chest. She pulled his arms around her and held him tight.

"I love my body," she continued softly, "the way it is - now. I love that I can make love to you and Amanda with my body, the way it is, right now. I love that you and Amanda can make love to me the way my body is right now. If I have the surgery will that change everything? I'm scared that I might loose you. I'm not sure I could bare that. "

"Rachel, Amanda and I love you very much. That will never change no matter what you decide. But you have to decide that you want this for yourself and no one else. I wish I could make this easier on you but I can't."

"I know," she said, softly as she sat on the edge of the bed a moment before she stood up and padded barefoot to the bathroom.

Alex sighed. He knew she was going through a lot right now. But there was nothing he could say or do but wait and be supportive no matter what she decided. Deep down inside he knew that last night was a watershed moment for her. What they did together, as innocent and as loving as it was, changed everything for her. Perhaps she doesn't know it yet, he thought, but my sweet Rachel has become more a woman than she ever thought she could be.

The week spun by quickly. Alex and Rachel fell comfortably into a routine with Alex in classes and working at the convenience store at night, and Rachel in her day job and working as a hostess a couple of nights that week. They spent their late-nights together snuggling in Rachel's bed. And, when the weather turned cold outside they spent their free nights lying in bed under a ton of blankets and watching old movies on her television.

The days flew by but the joy and excitement was missing and they both felt it. They were missing Amanda. Neither of them had to say it, but they both knew it. It was like she was the third leg of a stool. Without her, they were not complete.

Finally, it was late Sunday afternoon, and the sun was dipping beneath the treetops and teasing with the horizon. Alex and Rachel woke up from a dreamy nap curled around each other in a lover's embrace. He opened a drowsy eye and looked at Rachel's alarm clock.

"Come on honey, we need to get dressed, we have to pick Amanda up at the airport in a couple of hours."

"Shouldn't you go alone," she said in a pout.

"Why?" he asked standing in the middle of the bedroom, naked and wondering where this came from.

"Because she loves me like a sister but I know she really only has eyes for you."

"I love you like my sister too, Rachel," he replied. "So what's that got to do with it?"

Rachel looked at Alex with sad eyes then reluctantly she picked her underwear off the floor and slumped back onto the bed.

"Rachel, my sweet Rachel," Alex sighed as he sat down next to her and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. He turned her to face him and kissed her lips gently.

"I love you so very much. More than if you were just my sister. I can't find a word to describe it, I'm not sure one exists in the English language. You are my lover and so is Amanda. You are my sister, and so is Amanda. I couldn't live my life now without you both in it, equally. I know Amanda feels exactly the same way. Now lets go get our sister. You know she'd be very upset if you didn't come with me to pick her up."

Rachel leaned over and kissed him on the cheek then, smiling meekly, she slowly padded towards the bathroom.

"I'll follow you into the shower once you're done Sis," he said with a gentle smile.

As small airports go, this one wasn't much to write home about. It's gotten to the point in America that if an airport isn't a hub for a major airline it's dinky. Regardless of how big the city is that it serves. And this one was dinky, pathetically so.

They got there early enough to be able to wait in the lobby for Amanda's plane to arrive. Alex sat thumbing through a city brochure while Rachel checked her voice mail.

"Did you find some houses for us to look at next week?" he asked.

"I did," she replied, putting her phone away. "There is this cute little bungalow that I simply adored but..."

"What?" he asked interrupting.

"Well, it doesn't have off street parking. I know that's one of your must haves. And the master bedroom was kind of small."

"A large bedroom is high on Amanda's list."

"Yeah, I know. But the yard was nice."

"So we'll just keep looking. I'll have some time off soon and I can help."

"We can but I still want you guys to have a look at it," she continued. "Maybe we can renovate."

"Only if we buy it, love," he said looking at his magazine once again.

"Hmm," she murmured.

A voice on the loudspeaker broke the drumming silence in the cabin of the airplane as it flew into the twilight. According to the pilot, Delta flight 4723 from Chicago -- O'Hare was running a little ahead of schedule due to a favorable tail wind. Amanda glanced out of the window and watched the twinkling lights scattered across the blackness far below. She had fun while she was in Seattle, for the first time in her life she really had fun there. Susan's wedding was small but lovely, the bride was beautiful, and the bridesmaid's dresses were so-so. But that is as it should be, she thought with a huge smile.

When Amanda met Susan at the airport she could see her beaming with joy, everyone could. Her joy was infectious. For the first time in her life Amanda could share that delight with Susan. She understood what it was like to truly be in love.

That first night, when they could finally be alone, she told Susan all about Alex and Rachel. Well, not everything, but enough for her to understand that Amanda was totally and blissfully in love with two of the most amazing people she had ever met.

It had been a crazy day with an afternoon and evening filled with wedding activities and everybody talking to everybody else and all at the same time. The excitement was contagious. It always is at weddings. So the quiet of a bedroom late at night and a chance to relax and catch up was appealing.

At first Susan didn't understand Amanda's relationship. She told her that perhaps Amanda's brief flirt with the Mormon Church had left more of an impression on her than she was willing to admit. But slowly she came to accept and understand that this wasn't something religious but something unique, something beyond a family bound by love and companionship. Well, however it was defined, the life that Amanda now led was perfect for her. Susan told her how happy she was for her.

"If there's ever a chance in the future," She said, the night they talked till nearly dawn, "I want to meet them. They sound like wonderful people, I'm really happy for you," she added giving Amanda a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

Amanda spent a couple of days at the Seattle office of Dresher, Cummings, and Sanford. They were cordial to her at first, not expecting much out of this 'cutie' from the east coast. They continued to act a bit aloof until the meeting turned to hard numbers and Amanda got busy. She smiled as she remembered the looks on their faces when she finished her report. Apparently they were impressed because the text message she received from Margaret the next day was glowing with support.

All in all, it had been a crazy whirlwind of a week. But through it all, her thoughts were always drawn back to Alex and Rachel. She Skyped them nearly every day and thanked the universe for the magic of a videophone call. She could see them but she missed their touch and caress. She missed the taste of their kisses and she missed their smell. As funny as that sounded when she said it out loud, she missed the way they smelled.

The plane dropped down through the clouds that had settled around Wilmington and Amanda could hear the landing gear drop into place with a thud. A moment later the plane was on the ground and moving quickly back to the terminal.

Amanda wiggled in her seat like a schoolgirl barely able to contain her excitement as the airplane taxied to the gate. In her lap, was a white box holding a huge slice of wedding cake and a thank you card from Amanda's cousin, Susan. She knew that Alex and Rachel would be standing in the lobby waiting for her. She couldn't wait for the plane to park. The anticipation was overwhelming. A weeks' worth of hugs and kisses were waiting for her.

That night they fell into Amanda's bed. This time the love they shared was slower and sweeter than ever before. They took their time and savored the caress of their bodies intertwined in lovemaking.

Each one touching and being touched.

Each one loving and being loved.

It was as close to bliss as any of them had ever imagined or wanted.

=THREE =

Ever since the first day they all went shopping for Alex's new wardrobe, he began to add a few feminine items to his daily attire. It all began shortly after their shopping trip. He added panties and bras -- mostly sports bras because they tended to minimize rather than emphasize his bust line. The sports bra added comfort and support without revealing too much. Eventually he added a hint of eye makeup and some concealer to hide a blemish or two.

He would add a subtle change in his clothes here and there as well. He liked to wear the occasional blouse or sometimes a pair of women's flats. None of these things drew much attention to themselves except perhaps for the simple silver necklace and matching diamond stud earrings that he liked to wear occasionally. Partly, he supposed, because the necklace was a gift from Rachel and the earrings were a gift from Amanda and partly because they were so pretty.

At first he felt uncomfortable with the changes to his wardrobe. Gone were most of the flannels and plaids that usually hung off his body, faded and threadbare. Cotton blouses and shimmering poly-cotton tops replaced the faded and well-worn shirts. They shaped his body rather than concealed it. Gone were some of his jeans and chino pants to be slowly replaced by skirts, dresses, and slacks. His wardrobe wasn't totally transformed. He hadn't agreed to live completely like a woman. But there was an obvious shift in the clothing that he wore each day. At first, however, it worried him.

Part of the worry was, he surmised, because of the social taboo of men wearing clothes that were obviously meant for women, something ingrained in him since early childhood. And part of it was because he didn't like to stand out in a crowd.

So many other men came before him who liked to flaunt a garish lifestyle in the name of cross-dressing and flamboyant transvestitism. Because of that and other prejudices, society seemed to turn a jaundiced eye to someone like Alex who was struggling with his own identity. The first few weeks were nerve-wracking for him but eventually he settled down and realized that ultimately, most people just didn't care. He decided to take Rachel's advice and not worry about it. If anyone had a problem with it, it was their issue not his.

Around noon Alex gathered up his notebook and iPad. He stuffed them into the backpack that he dropped on a chair by the front door. Usually he would pull his hair into a tight ponytail, wrap it tightly and shove it all under a stocking cap. But today he thought, he was tired of looking grungy at school all the time.

He brushed his hair and let it fall gracefully around his shoulders in gentle curls. Then he attached a hair clip to pull it out of his eyes. He was dressed in a pair of skinny jeans and a comfortable cotton blouse that had a nice cowl neck to hide the sports bra beneath.

"Baby steps," he muttered to himself softly.

He wore knee high hose and oxford flats to complete the look. A light dusting of eye makeup and a dash of mascara and he was ready to go. Satisfied with the effect he turned out the bathroom light, grabbed his backpack, and was out the door and down the stairs.

Thirty minutes later Alex walked into Rollins Hall where his afternoon class was held. As he climbed the stairs he glanced from side to side to see most of the people in the hallway didn't pay any attention to him as he passed them by.

He turned to climb the next flight of stairs to the second floor, Alex was tempted to take the steps two at a time, but that wouldn't be appropriate anymore. Instead he took a more leisurely approach and ascended the staircase slowly.

If Rachel saw him take two at a time she would kick his ass, he thought with a subtle smile.

Half way up the second flight of stairs he passed by Ray Klein who usually sat next to him in the advanced writing class he was heading for.

"Hey Ray," Alex said calmly waving as he climbed past him.

Ray waved back, glancing a second time while attempting to recognize the girl that just walked by.

Alex turned the corner at the top of the stairs and walked down the corridor to room 217. He walked into the room, sat down in his usual seat and gazed out the windows as he waited for Professor Dixon to arrive.

A moment later Ray sat down in the next row over. He cleared his throat then glanced over at Alex with a sheepish grin.

"You know, I always thought you were cute," said Ray casually. "But you always hid yourself under that stocking cap and all. I'm glad you decided to...you know," he mumbled sheepishly, "with the makeup and all."

Alex blushed slightly and glanced back at Ray. He gave him a gentle smile. He knew all too well what it was like to be in Ray's shoes. It wasn't that Ray was asking him out on a date or anything, but he could see in his eyes that the question was lurking somewhere in back of his mind. Talking to someone who you were interested in dating had always been traumatic for Alex, so he felt a little sympathy for Ray. But not enough to say yes or anything like that.

"Thanks Ray," Alex replied shyly. "I met someone recently and they sort of like it so I thought, why not?"

Ray nodded his head and sighed the 'damn, too late again' sort of sigh that all men know too well.

About then, Professor Dixon walked in and the room grew quiet. Ray turned around and that was the last time that day that anyone said anything more about it.

For the rest of the afternoon Alex noticed the occasional sideways glance from several of the other men in the room. He expected the glances to be followed by a stifled snicker but in reality, they were all kind of cute in their own sheepish way.

April was finally beginning to blossom.

One afternoon the following week, a fellow female student, Kimberly Crossman, in his English Literature class spotted a bra line beneath his shirt. She leaned forward and mentioned this to him as if she's caught him doing something naughty.

"And your point is?" Alex asked, with a wry smile.

"Well, wouldn't you be embarrassed? What if someone else caught you? They'd think you were a cross dresser or something," she whispered.

"You caught me, do I look embarrassed?"

"Well no, not really," she replied, blushing slightly.

Alex turned in his seat and smiled at her.

"Kim, do you think I'm a cross-dresser?" he whispered conspiratorially.

"Well no, I mean...I don't know, maybe," she replied with a frown turning a deeper shade of crimson. "What if the boys saw it, they might beat you up. Doesn't that worry you?" her face was suddenly filled with an honest concern. Alex's smile broadened, he was beginning to really like Kim.

She was a pretty girl, long straight blonde hair that hugged her face and fell softly past her shoulders. Above the layers of concealer she trowelled on her face she had lovely arched eyebrows that framed gentle blue eyes.

But her face was scarred with acne in a few places and she always seemed self-conscious about it. She was a bit heavy handed covering it up with concealer and Alex wondered if that was the reason why she tended to shy away from going out on any dates. Most of the other guys in the room had hit on her once or twice but she seemed to always have an excuse not to go out.

It was kind of a sad if that was the case, he thought, she's such a sweet girl.

"Nope, we're not in high school anymore, Kim. Maybe they might be embarrassed but that's an issue they have to deal with not me. I don't dress to fit someone else's standards anymore. I've decided to dress for my own comfort."

"Oh... cool. So if I walked in here tomorrow wearing a flannel shirt and no bra you wouldn't say anything?"

"Of course I would! You would look pretty hot in flannel. No pun intended."

She pursed her lips together into a smirk and swatted him on the shoulder. "You're insane."

"Thank you, I'm glad you noticed," he replied smiling sweetly. "And Kim."

"Yes?"

"Thanks for caring."

She smiled awkwardly and shrugged.

Kim caught up with Alex after class was over and invited him to get a cup of coffee across the street in the local bistro.

They sat in silence for several minutes while Kim stirred the cream in her coffee. She was obviously working up the courage to ask him something.

"What did you want to talk about Kim?" Alex asked, with a wry smile.

Kim blushed again and looked up into Alex's eyes.

"What you said in class today, about dressing to suit your own comfort," she said softly. "It really struck a chord with me. I mean about being you and not worrying about what others thought. I thought you were so brave doing that on your own."

Alex studied Kim for a moment then smiled sweetly.

"Kim, what do you think of me?"

"I don't know," she murmured softly. She looked down and fiddled with a delicate necklace, surprised by the sudden shift in the conversation. "I thought I understood who you were but recently you've changed so much I don't know anything anymore."

"Do you like the changes you see?"

"Well, yes. You seem so centered now, much more than you ever were before. When I watched you walk over here to meet me just now, you walked with such grace. I've never seen that in you before."

Alex smiled and blushed silently thanking Rachel and Amanda for their tenacity.

"Why don't you go out with anyone in the class?" Alex asked. "We've been out drinking several times before and we've always invited you along but you always beg off."

"Promise you won't laugh?" she asked earnestly.

"Of course," he replied with equal sincerity.

"I'm terrified."

"Of what?"

"Of them, of what other people might think of me," she said, her eyes were tearing up. "Of how I look, how I dress, everything," she whispered with such intensity that Alex was stunned.

"Would you tell this same thing to, uh, Ray for example?" Alex asked gently.

"God no, I'd be mortified."

Alex tilted his head a bit and looked at Kim again. He knew she had a thing for Ray. Alex had seen her glance at him from time to time in class. She blushed crimson then glanced away trying desperately to regain her composure. Alex pulled out his cellphone and punched a few buttons. A moment later Rachel answered.

"Hi Rachel, do you think there's room for one more at the dinner table tonight?" Alex asked.

"I think so," Rachel replied casually tossing the last of the vegetables into a salad.

"I'd like to bring a friend from school over to meet you and Amanda," Alex continued watching Kim's reaction. "Would that be all right?"

"Sure, hey Sis, come in here. Alex's is bringing a friend home from school," she yelled.

He could hear them giggling like schoolgirls.

"All right you two, behave. We'll be over in a half hour, bye."

He clipped his phone shut and smiled at Kim.