Sweep Me Off My Feet Ch. 07

"I always had my suspicions, but wow!" Zach continued, pacing back and forth in anger. "At least three people, huh? Yeah, Carter basically told him everything he knew. I'm just glad Zayne was completely and totally unable to even think about sex during that time anyway thanks to, you know, the excruciating pain in his back every time he fucking moved so he didn't catch anything from your dirty skank ass!"

Brinxton took a moment to assimilate that information before looking to Brielle to see her reaction. She was staring down at Daniel with a steely look on her face, but she did not seem surprised at all.

"You said he knew about that," Brielle commented after a moment. "That he knew you cheated with a few guys at the end and forgave you for it but wanted space from you."

Brinxton wasn't super surprised that she knew but he was more than disgusted with Daniel. "Did he tell you that he tried to make out with Zayne at the Bachelor weekend too?" he blurted out.

This time Brielle did look surprised, her eyes widening as she looked at her brother, before she turned back to her husband and crossed her arms. "Is that right? No, he hadn't mentioned that, but it definitely falls outside the scope of acceptable behavior we had agreed on."

Zach looked Brielle over for a moment as the rest of them took that in. "I don't know whether to call you progressive or insane. Either way, Zayne certainly didn't ask for that because he was really upset after it happened. Him and Brinxton spent the entire day off on their own adventure instead of with us."

Brielle shrugged at Zach's comments about their relationship. "I'm not your typical person. I feel attachment and fondness, but I don't know that romantic love is my thing. I like Daniel's company and attention though, and we've always gotten along and have settled into something that works for us, but Zayne was off limits because as much as Daniel hates the wheelchair, he still wants him, and I didn't imagine Zayne wanted to be the side piece."

"That doesn't seem to be the case, no." Brinxton confirmed.

"He'd rather disable himself more on purpose," Elias added in agreement. "Like, hot pokers through his eyes."

"Cut his own tongue off," Zach continued.

"Saw his own hand off with a rusty saw," Elias added.

"Are you two quite finished?" Daniel demanded as he stood back up.

Brinxton spoke up, "No, I think they left quite a bit out."

"Cut his dick off with an old scalpel," Zach said.

"Slice his vocal chords into shreds," Elias continued.

"I can keep going," Zach agreed. "All day, Danny. All day. Six fucking months! My brother practically worshiped the ground you walked on, and you do that to him? I should cut off your dick for that. If Brielle decides she's done with it, I'll be back with a machete."

"So, what, Zayne couldn't handle his own confrontation at all so he sent you two idiots instead?" Daniel asked them.

"Likely he had too much respect for Brielle to ruin her big day," Brinxton reasoned aloud. "That's what people with class do."

Zach pointed at Brinxton as if that was exactly the reason. "Zayne didn't care so much about your day, but didn't want Brielle's wedding tainted with me punching you. Well the wedding is done. Maybe Zayne will confront you on his own later, or he'll decide you aren't worth it. I guess we'll see once he's back."

"Back?" Brielle asked, and this time she looked at Brinxton, taking in the red rimmed eyes and the lost look on his face that looked so much more pronounced now that she realized Zayne had left. "Do you want me to postpone the honeymoon? I don't have to leave you alone through this."

"You'd postpone the honeymoon for him?" Daniel demanded, and got a look from Brielle so venomous that he actually backed up in surprise.

Brinxton, looking a bit surprised himself, said, "No, but I appreciate you. It seems you two have some things to work out anyway. I promise I won't do anything rash before you get back."

Brielle looked at Brinxton, searching his face to make sure he was telling her the truth, and then nodded her head. She turned to Daniel and pointed to their car angrily. As Daniel sulked over to the car, Brielle gave an apology to Zach, Elias, and Aspen for her husband's audacity. Zach shook his head at that, because the apology should have been coming from Daniel, not Brielle.

They watched the two of them depart, and they could all see Brielle ripping into Daniel once he pulled out of the parking lot. Zach let out a sigh before he turned to really take in Brinxton's appearance.

"Is there anything we can do to help?" he asked, looking like he wanted so badly to interfere in all of this and fix it. Brinxton could see pain in his gray eyes that looked so much like Zayne's.

Brinxton tried to fix his face, ultimately unsuccessfully, especially because the exact mirror of Zayne was so close to him, but he wasn't Zayne. "Probably not. I need to respect his desire for space. I just wish he could have waited a day."

"He kept looking for you at the wedding," Elias said.

"Yeah, he mentioned you kept disappearing, and he couldn't seem to track you down," Zach agreed. "He said he wanted to sit and talk, and he had hoped to dance with you at least once. Then Carter happened, and it was like all the fight went out of him."

Brinxton seemed to take that personally, as if it had been his fault he had been detained by Mick the whole night. "Yeah, if I didn't know better, I would suspect that Daniel had sent someone to hound me to death during the reception."

Zach's eyes suddenly looked like he was seeing something far away while Elias' mouth dropped open as he looked at Aspen who was staring at Brinxton in shock. Zach was the first to find his voice. "Maybe he did...He's been having issues with you two together ever since it started."

Brinxton looked suspiciously between Zach and Aspen. "Would the name 'Mick' mean anything to the three of you? You two seemed to know him at the wedding."

Zach nodded. "Yeah, we know him alright. He's gay, and the type that gives them all bad names, the same way Daniel gives bisexual men a bad name. He's also very buddy-buddy with Daniel and has been for a long time. They got far closer after we stopped being friends with him."

"We have to tell Zayne," Aspen said.

"His phone's off," Elias pointed out. "And he told us not to follow him."

Brinxton shook his head. "He asked for space and I want to respect that, though I'd also like to have a heart-to-heart with him too."

Zach growled in frustration. He hated not being able to fix things for his twin and knowing he was alone in his pain. "Fine, we'll give him two weeks, and then we're storming the castle. Or at least calling him to demand he talk to us."

"If you need anything from us, anything at all, please reach out to us," Aspen told Brinxton as she squeezed his shoulder comfortingly.

Brinxton thanked them, his appreciation plain on his face before he turned and walked to his car to go home. He had been doing a lot of thinking, before Zayne's letter and after, and he was beginning to realize that he didn't want to face the rest of his life without Zayne in it, whatever that meant for them as a couple.

~~~

Zayne had a headache the next day, the pounding in his temples worse than he'd had in a while. It was to be expected, though, with how hard he had cried and how upset he was. He ate some cereal and took a migraine pill before lying down again with an ice pack over his head and neck. Cloud curled up around his hip, purring against him like his purr could cure Zayne of his ailments. It was a small amount of unconditional love that Zayne needed right then.

It took half the day for him to get rid of the migraine completely, but by then he was ready to dive into some form of work. He pulled out the canvases that Jessie had gotten him and set one up on the easel. He put it at a height that worked perfectly with his wheelchair and got to work.

Zayne had put in for time off from his job, which was granted of course, and then he lost himself in charcoal, pastels, and paints. He would move around to keep himself from getting achy, but kept at his drawings and paintings for most of the time he was there. He would stop here and there to make food, or to sleep. Sometimes he would go in and shower, when the paint stuck to his skin was bothering him too much, though he didn't bother to shave.

Days blended together, and he lost all track of time without his phone on. Jessie would come by every once in a while to check on his supplies and to make sure he was taking care of himself. She could tell he was only eating enough to keep his strength up, and he wasn't doing any of his exercises so she would sometimes make him stop and do an hour's worth of physical therapy work before she would let him get back to it.

It was in those visits that Jessie got her first glimpse at the man who was haunting her cousin. He was in most of the paintings that Zayne had been working on, though he was working on other representations of heartache, like white roses blending into red before they fell into black ashes on the ground. She would take photos every once in a while of the paintings and send them to Zach, mostly so Zach knew what Zayne was doing and that he was still alive and functioning.

Two weeks passed in a blur of color and grief, and Zayne found that nothing was making his feelings for this man fade. He had hoped that falling back to art would be the way to do it, but all it had done was remind him of every little smile, every laugh, every touch of Brinxton's hand on his skin.

He walked into the bathroom to look at himself, taking in the loss of muscle mass and the bushy red beard that was already looking wild. His hair had grown out more, falling over his eyes. He pushed his hair back and sighed before he pulled out the clippers so he could cut down the beard. He took the time to shave and then went back out into the kitchen to make some tea.

All he wanted to do was call Brinxton and beg him to be with him, and he might have given in to that if he didn't have paint to work with. Eventually he did turn on his phone, but only enough to see the texts from Zach and Elias, and notice none from Brinxton. Then he sat and looked through the photos they took together. He felt like he was going through withdrawal from Brinxton, and it felt impossible.

Zayne had to force himself to put the phone down and go back to his art. Maybe another two weeks would do the job, though he was beginning to doubt it. Unlike with Daniel, Zayne might end up in love with Brinxton for the rest of his life, quietly pining over the perfect man he couldn't have. Maybe if he gave Brinxton time, ten years or so, maybe then it would work. He closed his eyes against that, taking a deep breath, and then when he opened them again, he picked up the palette and went back to work.

Back at home, Brinxton was left alone with his thoughts as his parents were busy with preparations for one of the society's charity events, and Brielle was on her honeymoon. His parents had been happy to find out that Brinxton was not spending time with Zayne anymore because it meant he wasn't embarrassing them, and they told him as such. When Brielle came back from it, she and Daniel were working on moving into a home together, so she came home to pack up and that included going through the wedding gifts so they could see what needed to be exchanged and where they would put what they were keeping.

She was sitting in the living room when she got to Zayne's gifts, so she called Brinxton's phone and asked him to come to see something at their parents' house. She looked up when he walked in, taking in his appearance. Brinxton looked haggard. His appearance was usually on point and his clothing immaculate, if still giving that lived-in flair but today, and probably for a while judging from the vintage dry sweat stains on his t-shirt, he looked like he was not at his best. His eyes were sunken and it was clear he hadn't eaten much in a while.

Brielle frowned at him and waited until he was sitting on the couch before she spoke. "I've been going through the wedding gifts and I just got to Zayne's. I thought you might want to see them."

She opened up the box she had resting on the floor and pulled out two stretched canvases. She turned the first one around to show a painting of the bride and groom. It was done in a mix of acrylic and oil, and had captured them both particularly well. Zayne had given the painting a soft look to it, so they seemed happy. It gave it a gentle quality. Even if Brinxton didn't like his brother-in-law, he could see how well done the painting was.

Brielle waited until Brinxton put that painting aside and then turned the second one over. This was a painting done in the same media, but it was of Brielle and Brinxton. He used that same soft, ethereal look to it, highlighting ways that they were similar while using shadows and darker colors to show their differences. In the painting, Brinxton looked relaxed and happy, which he usually wasn't when around his family like in the painting, though he realized he probably did look that way around Zayne.

Brinxton teared up and hid his face in his hands. He had kept up a brave face mostly by pushing his feelings down and storing them away but seeing the painting broke the dam that was holding back the sea of grief over most probably losing Zayne to Brinxton's own commitment issues. Brielle put the painting down, leaning it up against the coffee table with the other one, and pulled Brinxton into her arms to let him break down.

Once he had calmed down a little, Brielle asked him, "So, you've been patient and given him space. Now what are you going to do about it?"

Brinxton sniffled, pulling out a handkerchief from his back pocket and blowing his nose noisily. "I honestly don't know. I don't think he wants to see me."

"Is it that, or is he scared that being face to face with you will bring you rejecting his feelings?" Brielle asked. "I would think even if he didn't want to see you because he's hurt and grieving, knowing how you felt would change his opinion pretty quickly."

"Would it? Or did I wait too long? This kind of guesswork is hard for me. I never thought I would be in this kind of crisis," Brinxton said dejectedly.

Brielle looked thoughtful. "You know, I bet we know someone who could help with that guesswork. Someone who is almost like one half of the same egg or something. Entirely identical to Zayne, and yet so very different, with twin telepathy built in."

Brinxton nodded miserably, ready to reach for any chance to resolve this. He had thought he could mourn their situationship and move on, but he couldn't get Zayne out of his head. Brielle decided she didn't think he should drive in this state, so she took the initiative to get him into her car and drove them to Zayne's home and knocked on their door.

Zach opened the door and looked between the two of them before opening the door all the way and moving out of the way to let them in. "So, I see the last two weeks have been hell for you. I don't think they've been much better for my brother. So what can I do to help?"

"I need to get a message to him, but I'm worried he would ignore anything I send him," Brinxton said dejectedly. He was like a shadow of his former self, taking up practically no space and self-conscious about everything.

Zach frowned, considering that. Most of their own messages had gone unreplied to, so it was a real worry here. "I don't think he's looking at his phone much right now. We can call the landline but sometimes he ignores that. Can I ask you a question?"

Brinxton nodded, waving as if to tell Zach to ask away.

"Are you in love with my brother?" Zach asked.

Brinxton didn't even have to think about that any more. He nodded and then cleared his throat before answering, "Yes, I am."

Any of the guardedness that Zach had up went away then. He pointed at Brinxton and said, "Alright. First things first, you, in the shower. Brielle, go pack a bag for Brinxton. A week's worth of clothes, at least."

Brielle nodded and went back out to her car while Zach had Brinxton go into Zayne's shower to get washed up. Brielle got back by the time Brinxton was out of the shower and drying off. Zach picked some pants and a shirt for Brinxton to wear, and then they bid Brielle goodbye and got into Zach's car.

The drive to Vail was beautiful, with the snow all around the landscape, though Brinxton was nervous the entire time. They pulled up into the driveway of a two story cabin. They could see lights inside. Zach hit the button for the garage door and then turned to look at Brinxton.

"If he's not painting in the living room, then he'll likely be in the bedroom that is down the long hallway on the right. I think this is something you two need privacy for," Zach told him. "I know you're scared, but I know Zayne. He'll be happy to see you."

Brinxton looked apprehensive. "Do I just go in? Should I knock?"

"Just go in," Zach explained. "Jessie has been visiting, but if she knocks, he doesn't always answer. Don't take his surprise as him not wanting you there. You can do this."

Brinxton nodded, screwing up his courage before getting out of the car and going inside. The garage door led into the living room, which was cluttered with canvases and art supplies. The majority of the paintings that Brinxton could see had him as the subject. Whether it be him smiling, laughing, on one of the rollercoasters, or just lounging around. Some of them were both him and Zayne together, but there were other paintings as well, such as roses drying up and falling to the ground as nothing but ash, a heart with cracks all along it and oozing blood, and a painting of empty wine bottles littering what would have been an otherwise beautiful living room.

Brinxton stood for a long while admiring the paintings, tears once again coming to his eyes at the sight of the sadder ones. After a time, he realized Zayne wasn't in the living room, but Brinxton could hear movement down the hallway in the bedroom. He didn't want to startle him, so he called out, a tremulous "Hello?" barely recognizing his own voice.

Zayne froze in putting his shirt on at the sound of the voice. It both sounded like Brinxton but also didn't. Zayne had just finished a shower, washing all of the paint away because it was irritating his skin again. For a moment he sat there in silence, trying to decide if he had imagined it before he got up and stumbled out into the hallway.

Much like Brinxton had not been looking like himself, Zayne wasn't entirely either. Jessie had been washing his clothes for him, or else he would have been in days old clothes, but besides that, he had the beginnings of a red beard again, just a few days' past a five o'clock shadow, and he had bags under his eyes from too little sleep. Brinxton could see he had lost weight as well.

"Brinxton?" Zayne asked, as if he couldn't believe his eyes. Was he hallucinating after all of this time of wishing for him to be there?

Brinxton tried to respond but his voice cracked. He coughed delicately and tried again, "Yes, it's me. I'm sorry to burst in on you like this while you wanted solitude, but I wanted to tell you something and I just couldn't wait any longer." He fumbled for a moment and pulled a folded sheet of paper from his pocket. It looked like it had been there since Zayne left and had been opened and reread frequently before being carefully re-folded and put away. Zayne recognized it as his letter.

Zayne was surprised to see it there with him, looking down at it for a moment before he turned a searching look to Brinxton's face. Zayne looked tense as he waited for Brinxton to go on, like he was bracing himself to hear something that could hurt.