The 4th Lady McKenzie

"No mom. Oh you two will have a great time catching up. I'll now be less worried about you."

"Worried? Really Fiona. May I ask why you have a scope on your rifle? I shot a young wild goat for the table just before I left for the village. I could have dropped it half a mile away with a scope. It's not sport darling."

"Then take the damn thing off."

"Um, perhaps I'll leave it. My eyesight is not what it used to be."

"Yes mother," Fiona giggled. "Say hi to Midge from me."

Fiona saw she'd received a message from Sir Alec so called him.

"I'm worried about your mother out there all alone. She will be okay I'm sure, once she settles in."

"So why call me? She has a cell phone."

"I don't have the number."

"You didn't say you were calling to get her number."

"Christ, what is this?" A courtroom interrogation?"

"What is it Sir Alec?"

"You may call me Alec. Your mother and I haven't been on good terms although actually we were okay when negotiating over the sale of her fleet. I'd like to go out and have dinner with her this evening and want you to accompany me as an intermediary."

Fiona had scheduled the evening for study but thought Sir Alec facing off with her mother would be too good to miss.

"Okay. She doesn't have much food out there."

"That's not a problem. I'll toss in a sack of potatoes and buy four barbecued chickens and a heap of frozen vegetables."

"She has no fridge."

"Then I'll buy her one that runs on bottled gas.. Oh and some wine and I'll pick you up, say at 4:45?"

"Okay. Here's my address."

"I have it already. I own most of the houses on that street. Be smiling and looking pretty for me Fiona. It might also impress your mother."

"Then don't wear a dinner suit."

"Lay off Fiona. I know it's dinner in a farmhouse hovel."

Fiona knew she'd like the old cuss who'd she understood would turn sixty-five next year. He was one of those 'favourite uncle' characters, gruff injected with a bit of fun and as straight as they come. On the drive out in his fancy German V10 SUV Fiona asked him about his climb to fame, as she put it, and he entertained her brilliantly and with wit, especially when describing wives number two and three.

"Your first wife, you missed out describing her?"

Alec choked slightly when saying, "She died after giving birth to Craig."

"Oh god, I'm sorry for asking."

"No, it's fine."

"No it's not."

"Yes it is. I'm hoping Craig will fall for you."

Fiona sat stunned.

"Come on Fiona, don't disappoint me. Where's the repartee?"

"I'm sure neither Craig or I would welcome such interference. I did not respond because I did not wish to appear rude."

"No harm done. Tell me about you and my mother, you know, in your earlier times."

Alec began, "There was no other woman within a hundred miles, perhaps another hundred miles more that was capable of capturing my heart as a lonely widower than your mother..."

Alec went on to tell Fiona the story of how he went after the already married Iona Phelps. He said there was something about MacDonald women and went on to relate a blow-by-blow account of how he pressured Iona and how they finally consumed their mutual passion, holding back detailing what they actually did.

It was related in such a rousing manner that Fiona was, in terms of Victoria literature, aware her bosom was heaving.

"So there you are and here we are," Alec said, as the former homestead came into view. "Hello, she has visitors."

"Alec," Fiona said, dabbing at her eyes. "I shall never forget you telling me about and my mother and you."

"Well girl, you don't have to worry about being imposed upon as an intermediary. Your mother has other people here."

Iona stepped forward and said, "Welcome to my humble abode Sir Alec. Hello dear. This is a most unexpected arrival."

He daughter watched the younger two men behind Iona almost cower. If they were farm hands it was remarkable they were so well dressed, in town clothes it seemed.

"The boys have just arrived with my horse and complimentary firewood authorized by Mrs Cosgrove."

"Midge, you'll remember her. She was raised in this district."

"Indeed and I lunched with her."

"And she approved of you selecting that bay gelding? That's one of Allan's mounts, I think his second-best."

"Aye, I wanted his best but there is such a thing you'll be unaware of called discretion."

Alec grinned but then frowned. "That ill-thrift bull. Bert, what the hell are your playing at giving Miss MacDonald that cattle beast. It's dying."

"She picked it Sir Alec. Um ladies know best."

"Bert is correct Sir Alec. That critter will become the biggest bull on this property in two years."

Iona saw her daughter elbow Alec in the ribs and smiled when he said, "As you wish dear. Fiona and I decided to impose on you for dinner."

"Very well, It will be starvation rations. I am roasting a piece of beef but that won't go far. There will be one potato each and..."

"Miss MacDonald, Sir Alec said straightening to his height of almost six foot six. "A gentleman doesn't call on a lady unexpectedly accompanied by her adult daughter without ensuring the table will groan under food. Boys, over here and unload my wagon."

"A refrigerator; oh dear, what do I have to do to justify being given that?"

"Iona, there should have been one here but it must have been stolen. This dwelling has practically been abandoned since Harry Jones attempted to burn it to the ground by smoking in bed when drunk."

"Well thank you Sir Alec. Bert, you obviously know Sir Alec. Sir Alec this is an Australian Clancy, one of your stockmen, and this his sidekick with a great young Border Collie called Mace, Jim Owens also known as Young Jim."

"Sid and Joan's youngest?"

"Yes sir," retorted the astounded youngster.

"When my father and I won a Government lease to a high country run I had a Border Collie called Mace. Best eye dog I ever had."

"You mustered high country?" Jim said, mouth hanging open.

"You have to start somewhere young man. High country is tough but it makes you tough."

"Well everyone, inside for pre-dinner whiskies." Iona invited.

The two younger men looked at Bert and he shuffled his feet and said, "Under the circumstances we best be heading off."

Iona snorted, "Nonsense. If anyone is leaving if will be the late-comers."

Sir Alec grinned, "Boys, it appears if you are under orders to stay. Luckily I threw in a crate of beer."

After a few beers the boys eyed the table piled with food as if all their Christmases had come at once.

"Right everyone sit up," Iona called. "Sir Alec you sit opposite me, Jim and Fiona you sit on that rickety bench seat and Bert you sit opposite them and make sure nothing funny goes on between those two young people."

Jim turned scarlet but Fiona was up to it. "Tell me about this great dog of yours Jim."

Everyone except Fiona got drunk, so she drove Alec back to Dunedin. Alec waxed on about how magnificent Iona had looked and how superbly she had hosted the dinner. That failed to impress Fiona because she thought her mother had been acting just like her mother.

Fiona parked the SUV in Alec's garage and he said, "It would be improper to ask you in although I have a resident housekeeper."

"Yes, it would not go down well with my mother."

"I'll call a taxi."

"No thanks I'll walk."

"You're stubborn, just like your mother."

"And what may I ask is wrong with that and what may I ask is wrong with wanting to walk home when it's only three blocks away?"

"You might fall foul of strangers."

"Ooh, I've not had that happen to me."

"God you are incredibly like your mother."

Fiona frowned. "Never have I heard her talk like that?"

"Ah yes, but what about when she was young and fiery?"

"Oh yeah, that could be my mum. Good night. That was a worthwhile experience."

Walking home she passed a small 'restaurant row' on the opposite site of the street and saw her current lover Hammond Hay with his arm around a woman and once clear of the doorway they moulded into a hug and began a kiss no guy would ordinarily give a sister or young aunt. "Goodbye your jerk," Fiona murmured and just avoided tripping over a drunk on the pavement.

Perhaps she should look at Craig McKenzie?

Nah.

* * *

Iona rose at dawn next morning and found nothing much to clear away. The dishes left to dry naturally had dried so she put them away. It really had been a great night. The boys once they had a couple of beers into them had ceased being shy of Alec and he astounded them by knowing more about cattle rearing and growing-on than they did. The bad news had been when the boys had arrived earlier with the horse called Paddy. Bert took her aside and said the dog he was intending to loan her was convulsing and probably would have to be 'put down' if not better in the morning.

The bull was grazing near the back of the house so Iona called it to the gate, putting out molasses on a lid from an abandoned chemical drum. She stood back and the bull came to view her, saw the lid and sniffed, but did not lick the treacly mass.

"Damn," she fumed.

She went into the garage and tore some hay from one of the two bales she'd purchased from the farm supplies store the previous day. She went in by the bull fearlessly. It backed off snorting and watchful as Iona scrapped molasses off with the hay and dumped the hay on the ground. The bull ate the hay, obviously knowing what that was, and apparently when finishing that had decided molasses was acceptable so licked the lid clean,

Paddy came up and when the bull ambled off the horse came forward and that gave Iona an idea. She grabbed a handful of hay off the bale and came out with a halter and entered the paddock. Paddy didn't show any concern as she attached the halter and by then he'd scoffed the hay so she led him out to saddle him and swap the halter for a bridle.

Iona mounted, no problem. Paddy was quiet. But there would be a problem with her thighs and butt if she rode for too long. She must adapt slowly to riding again, meaning toughing up. She was fifty not fifteen. She rode down to the beach and along the shallows. Paddy obviously liked being in the sea,

Back home she gave Paddy another handful of hay and placed a dab of molasses on it. He liked that. So each morning for the next three days Iona called bull and horse for molasses and on the forth morning they were waiting for her, training time over. She walked in and held the hay out to the bull. It backed off. She stayed quietly as eventually it came forward and began eating. No problem. Well Aberdeen Angus were renowned as being quiet cattle. Still neither horse nor bull was to be trusted completely.

Mid morning Bert called and said they were almost ready to bring the bulls back down as weighing, drenching and vaccinating had been completed.

"I've been talking to Allan. He has two dogs and only needs one to look as if he's a cattleman. Which one do you want, Tom or Zoë?"

"Which will be the best dog for Allen?"

"Not Zoë, that's for sure. I thought you would have asked for the best dog."

"Well now you know differently. Drop her off on the way past and you guys call into for afternoon tea on the way back."

"A beer? Some were left over weren't they?"

"Yes. Beer it is."

Iona used the piece of bent metal used as a whistle that Bert had given her when dropping off Zoë. Initially Zoë was confused but Iona got a couple of commands right and thought Zoë was accepting her. When Bert returned he tutored Iona with a whistle and Zoë was carrying out basic commands. "Try her on your bull."

"I'm taming him. I don't want him upset."

"The occasional use of Zoë will remind him he's not boss. Actually once you send Zoë off she'll work it out yourself and bring the bull to you. What's it's name?"

"I was thinking Calvin."

"You're kidding? You picked good type and conformation. He's programmed to be really big for an Angus. Get the weight back on him and he'll grow."

"And so?"

"Calvin is a dumb name for a big bull."

"All right smart ass. Suggest something better?"

"Easy. Call him Zorro."

"Oh god, that's it. Zorro. Thank you Bert. Like another beer? I must stock up.

She sent Zoë off after Zorro and she brought him up to the gate without undue haste. Iona was waiting there with molasses-dribbled hay to avoid Zorro thinking he'd been messed around for nothing, if a bull would think that way.

On Friday Alec called Iona.

"What are you doing?"

"God I thought you were a busy businessman?"

"I am."

"I'm reading."

"About tomorrow night."

"What about it?"

"A cocktail party for a visiting group American cattlemen and wives. I was going alone and then thought of you."

"Oh."

"I thought I'd show off to those Americans I'm hooked into a pretty woman."

Iona sniffed and said, "You big buffoon." She couldn't help smiling.

"Yes?"

"Yes."

"I'll pick you up at 5:20 for a 6:15 start."

Iona said she'd drive herself to the city and asked for the name of the venue.

"Okay but I thought if I drove you back home you'd invite me to stay the night?"

"It's great how two minds can think alike but I'll drive myself in. What do I wear... ripped jeans with bits of cow shit sticking to them? Your guests are cattle people."

"Please yourself. You'll look good in anything."

Iona switched off her phone and laughed. Showing her off indeed. The old coot was losing it.

Alec, dressed in a dinner suit, was waiting in the foyer and smiled appreciatively as Iona walked into view. She was wearing high black boots with big silver buckles over black tights and a short Macdonald tartan kilt and a plain white blouse with puffed sleeves and a low necklace of the Macdonald badge in solid gold.

"You look marvellous," he said, kissing her and gloated, "Some of these Yank ladies who think they're pretty cool are just going to love you."

"I'm glad I'm come for your amusement."

"Aw Fiona, give a guy a break."

"Right in we go you big ox."

"We'll be announced, I'm president of the Otago Cattleman's Association."

"Oh god, how will I be introduced?"

"Relax, I decided to act conservatively knowing it would meet your approval."

They stood at the doorway behind the association's chief judge. There was a drum roll and he marched in, wheeled and stood to the side, having instructed the couple to continue walking in slowly.

"Distinguished visitors, ladies and gentlemen. I announced the arrival of our esteemed president Sir Alexander McKenzie and his great friend Iona Macdonald.

"Great friend, when was that?" Fiona hissed.

"Between the times you treated me with disdain," he whispered, waving to acknowledge the warm greeting.

People crowded them, local breeders introducing their American guests who they were hosting as couples or larger groups.

Women, including local women, asked Fiona were she and Sir Alexander, er, together?"

Iona had expected to be asked that so said, consistently, "In a manner of speaking." At one stage she heard a woman from Missouri asked Alec outright, "Do you and Fiona live together?"

"Oh no," she heard Alec reply and coloured when he added, "But ma'am is you can manage to persuade Iona to do that I would be most pleased."

"I bet," said the big lady, digging Alec in the ribs.

Women from Colorado, Idaho, Illinois and Iowa gave Iona their card and said, "You and Sir Alexandra must come and stay with us." She was astonished at the camaraderie that cattle associations could generate. One woman gave the offer to visit and her husband added, "We maintain an apartment in Chicago that you may also use with our compliments."

The bar closed at 8:30 and the visitors left with their hosts because they would be moving to the mountain resort town of Queenstown for a couple of days 'breather' without inspecting cattle and looking at cattle breeding and rearing techniques.

Iona stayed on while Alec chatted with association stalwarts over a bottle of whisky in a side room. Alec caught her yawn and said, "Right chaps, I'm off."

In the foyer Iona said she was off home.

"Are you sure?" Alec asked hopefully.

"Look Alec, I'm not hopping into bed with you like one of your bunnies. If you want me, woo me."

"You mean you'd marry me?"

"Well I wasn't thinking of going that far. I suppose it could come to that."

"You suppose?"

"Kiss me but don't whack my backside Alec. People are still coming out. But kiss me as if you like me as a great female friend."

"What about like a former lover?"

"As you wish."

As Iona left she smiled, thinking the old coot was still capable. As he'd kissed her, pressing into he, she'd felt his erection.

"It has never been left long enough unused to grow lethargic," she said and howled in laughter, stopping for yet another blasted set of traffic lights. Why did city authorities make cities so unfriendly? "To stop banging your vehicle into the vehicle of some stupid women driver," she said "Marry Alec McKenzie. Now there's a thought," she said, and began thinking about it.

Arriving home Alec made a call. "Hi, it's Alec."

"Why are you calling me late at night?"

"It's not late, only 9:45. What are you doing?"

Fiona said she was studying.

"What, no boyfriend?"

"Not at the moment if you must know."

"Look, I've just left your mother..."

"So she turned you down and you thought of me as a backstop."

"That's disgusting."

Fiona said she was glad he thought so.

"Listen, come with me tomorrow early. I'm driving to Christchurch to pick up six yearlings that arrived in Lyttleton last night. They were landed in Auckland by air and have met all import requirements so are free to be carted to my Tikitki Station. I'm leaving in a horse float at 6:00 from outside my home."

"Ah I see. So your son is travelling with them."

"Yes. I need two people in the back with them. They are yearlings and we've made six stalls for them. If they go down I want them up immediately and that will take two people. I can get a farmhand to come with me but ... well you know."

"Well I suppose I have to meet him sometime; you are so stubborn you won't give up till I do. All right I'll come but we leave at 7:30."

"I have to be at the collection point at the agreed time Fiona."

"Okay, bloody 6:00 am on a Sunday morning then. I've heard you are a tough bastard."

"Thanks Fiona," Alec laughed. "Compliments coming from you sound good."

They were away at 5:55.

He asked, "Sleep well?"

"No I kept waking up, dreaming I was being chased by huge bulls."

Alec laughed and said she shouldn't drink cheap wine. "Now tell me everything you can about your mother that could be useful to me."

"Well, let's take the shortcut. She'll marry you providing you court her well and don't demand she give up her preference of being called Iona MacDonald. She won't mind in formal situations being called Lady McKenzie if granted that title. That's what I think but then who am I? You know what my mother is like."

"Oh you little beauty Fiona. You are the closest person to your mother and I treasure what you say?"

"Careful, praise becomes a habit."

"And you Fiona, what do you think about the possibility of me marrying your mother?"

"You're okay."

A big belly laugh filled the cab. "Oh Fiona, I find your eloquence simply stunning." The happy Alec put his foot down and built up speed to the permissible limit.

"Right, I want to know about your first wife and any problems the second and third wives gave young Grant. This is essential information for a young woman with an enquiring mind and could help me cope with your son and heir. But if he proves to be an asshole then that's me gone."

"Ah, he's a lovely laddie. Now where should I start?"

"The beginning is usually the best place to start. Throw in bits of hot sex to prevent me becoming bored taking this journey with an old man taking how long?"