The Booth

I walked past this porn store every day after school. Attending a downtown college meant I caught my bus home about 6 blocks from my last class. For four months I had walked past this store, always curious. The advertising said private video booths, adult literature, and videos for sale.

I had almost an hour to kill. I looked nervously up and down the busy street. I didn't want to be seen going in but my resistance had been worn down. I just had to see what was inside.

I pulled the door open and entered. The room was filled with racks of video tapes, magazines and some adult toys, dildos, vibrators. . . forbidden things. Being nineteen I was instantly hard. In the pre internet days porn was not easy to come by. Playboy or Penthouse was all most guys my age had. On all sides of me were pictures of naked women. Most of them doing something lewd with a man. In one isle there were videos of women naked with other women. The last isle held videos of men naked with other men.

I froze. I did not know that was a type of porn. We all talked about cocksuckers and fags but I hadn't really run into one, that I knew of. Here was an isle full of proof that men had sex with other men. I was instantly intrigued, excited.

I had experiment early with a friend of mine and had never forgotten it but as time went by girls were all I thought about. I had had sex with a few but the sex was always kind of rushed and not exactly fulfilling. My memories of that early exploration now filled my head. To say I was curious would be a gross understatement.

A man came into the isle. He looked at me. My jeans were tented a bit and he noticed and smiled at me. I blushed and left quickly. I was not a fag. I was straight. I think he was just laughing at my discomfort at being hard, or so I told myself.

Coming to the back corner of the room was a door into a dark space. It said "Video booths" above the door. I had never seen video porn and the idea thrilled me. I wandered in. I noticed a change machine for "tokens" which I assumed turned the videos on. I bought five dollars' worth. Every booth showed a picture of the video playing in that booth (there was no such thing as selecting a video -- each booth played only one.) I picked out a booth of a man and woman and entered. I closed the door and looked around. There was a screen on the wall and a slot for tokens. I slide a token into the slot and the screen lit up with a grainy image of a hot woman sucking a very large cock. About 2 minutes later the video stopped.

I left that booth seeking what else was playing. I found one booth in the back of the room playing man on man porn. I looked around -- nobody in view -- so I went in. I closed the door, put my token in and saw two men kissing. As they kissed, I got very turned on. One guy slide to his knees. He began to suck on a beautiful large cock. He did not so much suck it as worship it. He licked it up and down, ran his lips over it, rubbed his face all over it, licked the man's balls and then took the cock in his mouth. I was stunned but my cock was rigid. I liked what I saw.

I undid my jeans and slide them down and began to stroke myself. I was so totally lost in the video that I didn't notice there was a hole in the booth wall right next to me. I also hadn't see the fingers in that hole. I heard a light tap on the wall right next to me. I almost jumped out of my skin. It was then and looked and saw the finger and the hole in the wall. I had no idea why there was a finger in the opening, and I began to zip up when a voice said -- stick it through. I realized he was offering to suck my cock. I did just that. I leaned against the wall and I felt fingers on my cock. Then a warm wet mouth. My knees almost collapsed. He kept it up for 3 or 4 minutes then he quit. I saw a light in his booth as his door opened and he left. I was left high and dry.

Then my door opened. A man came in my booth. He wasn't handsome but he was well built. He turned and locked the door behind him. I was terrified what he was going to do to me. I wasn't the biggest boy in town. He looked at me and dropped to his knees and unzipped my pants and began to suck my painfully hard cock. It had to be the guy from the booth next to me. He got my shirt off and my pants on the floor. His mouth was incredible. It was the hottest thing I every felt. He sucked me slow and wet. He was in no hurry. Every time I got close he would stop and squeeze my cock at the base to keep me from coming.

Eventually he pulled off me, stood and dropped his pants.

"Touch it" his voice said.

I did. I wanted to. I wanted to feel a cock, feel how hard it was. It was hard because he found me exciting, sexy and I liked that.

It was warm, the skin was soft, and it was pulsing in my hand. I ran my hands up and down it in amazement. I wasn't stroking it so much as I was discovering it, exploring his wonderful cock. It was thick, very veiny and it was intoxicating.

Without warning he pulled my face to his and kissed me. I was shocked but his hands didn't give me any choice. I felt his tongue probing my lips and I opened my mouth. His tongue invaded and I welcomed it. He was manly, taller than me, and kissed me with heat and confidence. I really loved kissing him. It was electric, so intimate, so forbidden and dirty. I was naked in his arms, holding his hard cock as he kissed me. I moaned involuntarily. Fear flashed up in my mind. I did not know what I was doing but my body was telling me to keep kissing him, fondling him. I surrender to the need.

I felt his hands move to my shoulders and with gentle pressure he urged me to my knees. I fell to my knees on that sticky, nasty floor. In front of my face was the cock I was holding. I looked up at him and he looked into my eyes. I knew what he wanted -- and to my own surprise -- so did I. I took his cock in my mouth. It felt huge. He had a musky, manly, slightly sweaty aroma that overwhelmed my senses. I realized I was now a cock sucker. I had a flood of emotions run through me. Revulsion, fear, excitement, and lust. I think I must have frozen with that cock in my mouth. I could not let it go and I couldn't do anything more.

I think he sensed my confusion and put a hand on the back of my head and began to slowly fuck my mouth.

"Watch your teeth" he said.

I opened my mouth wider pulling my lips under my teeth.

"That's a boy -- that feels nice" he said.

I put my hands on his thighs. At first on the front of his thighs to push away but in time the moved to the back of his thighs so I could hold myself in place.

He was slowly fucking my face and I began to help him. My tongue began to caress the bottom of his cock. I could feel the v shape under his cock head. A few minutes later I realized his hand wasn't on my head anymore. I was actively sucking his cock. I liked it. I knew he liked it. My own cock was painfully rigid.

He lifted me up to my feet. He kissed me again. Then he turned me around and pressed me into the booth wall. He kissed the back of my neck and I felt his wet hard cock pressing between the cheeks of my ass. I had a sudden overwhelming desire to feel that cock inside me. I had never had such a thought.

"This will hurt at first, but it will feel really good eventually" the voice behind me said.

I just stood still. I was frightened but I could feel a need I had never experienced before. I could feel his cock in my crack and I began to grind against it.

"You want this cock? You want me to fuck you boy" He said in a voice deep with lust.

I didn't say anything.

"Say it boy -- say what you want" he said again.

"I want you to fuck me -- please? Please fuck me" I said in a whisper.

I cannot believe my own ears. That was my voice begging to be a faggot whore. I wanted it. I didn't say it out of fear of this man. I said it because it was true. I need him to fuck me.

He didn't move.

"Please, please fuck me. I need you to fuck me" I said louder

A cold wet slippery fluid was dripped down my ass. His fingers collected it and pushed it against my hole. I moaned moving into that finger. I slipped in. I moaned louder. He worked his finger in and out. Then a bit more fluid (I later found out it was called lube -- logically) then a second finger. I could feel the calluses on his fingers. It was a bit uncomfortable but pleasurable too. I was grinding my hips into his hand.

The fingers left and I felt the tip of his warm cock at my entrance.

"Don't yell, it will hurt at first. I will go slow. Try to relax."

He pushed. I hurt. He pushed further -- it really hurt. He pulled out and applied more lube.

He pushed in again and it really, really hurt. But I stayed there. It hurt something awful but it excited me even more. I really wanted him. I was nothing but lust and need. My entire being was focused on that cock trying to push into me

He backed out and began again, and I pushed back into him. I hurt so much but I felt his cock slide past my barrier and into me. He stopped.

"Hold still baby -- let your ass get used to it" his voice said.

In a few seconds the pain began to recede. I began to move against him.

"Oh -- it feels so good -- fuck me -- please?" my voice said.

He began to move rhythmically in me. A gentle slow tempo -- at first. The feeling was intense. I felt him filling me up and each stroke into me drove waves of pleasure through me. His tempo picked up. He began to fuck me in earnest. I realized my head was bouncing on the booth wall. I could hear the slap of his thighs on my ass. I was completely lost in the lust of the moment. I only knew I wanted him to keep fucking me. His hands were in my hips, firm rough hands. He was pulling me back into each stroke. Deeper and more forcefully with every thrust. It was the feeling of him in control, he liked my body. He wanted to fuck me because I turned him on. I loved that.

He began to grunt. And I felt an orgasmic wave building in me. I wasn't touching myself, but he was getting me so close. I felt his cock slamming into me, and I was grunting at each thrust. My legs began to shake, and my orgasm overtook me. I shot cum all over the booth, the wall, my leg , my pants, and I shook uncontrollably. It was as I was starting to come down, he started to cum in me. I felt his cock swelling in me and then he went so deep and he spasmed. He filled me with his seed. His body twitched and he cock spasmed over and over in me.

Finally, he finished. I leaned against the wall, panting and exhausted. My legs were like butter and I slowly slide down to kneel on the floor, sweat pouring off me and his cum dripping out of me. He stood, shaky and looked down at me. I looked up and he smiled.

"Did you like that?"

My cum was all over me -- I just smiled up at him. It was all the energy I had to do that.

He pulled his pants up and straightened up. Undoing the latch, he left. I was still on the floor and finally rose to sit on the bench in the booth. I looked up. Two men were at the door looking at me. The smiled and I saw their cocks in their hands.

I just shook my head no and closed the door.

I was exhausted, shocked, embarrassed, and humiliated. I was a faggot sitting in a pool of another mans cum leaking from me. It was cheap, tawdry, nasty sex. There was no emotion, no affection in it. I had let myself be used, like a cheap faggot slut. I was frightened. But I knew that I had liked what he did to me. No -- I loved it. He made me cum without ever touching myself. What kind of guy goes into a porn shop booth and lets himself be fucked like a common whore? Me.

I cleaned up the best I could and fled the store. I caught my bus and sat in the back. I felt horribly guilty, dirty, and ashamed. But the memory of what I had done excited again. I did like it. I did like being used like that. I liked that he found me exciting enough to have sex with. How could I look at my parents? What if they found out I was a faggot whore? I was confused, terrified and thrilled all at the same time.

For months afterward I avoided that block. I wouldn't walk past that store. But the thoughts of what happened stayed fresh in my mind. Eventually I returned. Many men sucked my cock and let me come in their mouths. I even fucked a few. I learned to suck cocks in there too. Slowly getting better at the art of pleasuring a cock. In time I began to swallow their cum.

I met and married a great woman. No she doesn't know. But I love her and she me. I remained true to her for a long time. But I strayed eventually. I couldn't stop thinking about cocks. Feeling a mans hands on me. I craved to be under a man again, feeling him fucking me, kissing me, Cumming in me. AIDS came. Scared me and everybody. When that horrible plague began to recede my curiosity returned. I now traveled for work. Craigslist presented a world of opportunities. I met men when I traveled. I also discovered bath houses, dark rooms, public sex with other men watching -- which I adored.

I came to peace with who I am over time. I did not choose to be sexually attracted to men. But I certainly was. The world moved on. Gay became more common place, then readily accepted by most people. To be gay was no longer viewed negatively but simply a fact.

My wife passed a few years ago. Though I am not young I am told I remain attractive. I find that men and women enjoy my company. But sex with men is by far my favorite. It is urgent, heated, desperate and completely engrossing. I learned I am a bottom, even a bit of a submissive bottom. I have slept with a number or men. I realize I like the sex with them but not the long term relationships. Women are easier to live with, to talk to and enjoy time with.

I opened a video porn booth door -- and utterly changed who I was, how I saw myself and my entire world. I have no regrets -- and many, many erotic memories to enjoy.