The Bus Ride

[yeah, I have a high sex drive. I rly do. Horny all the time! Lol]

She sent another text right away. [omg cant believe I said that!]

[I sympathise with your sex drive]

[ah poor baby]

[tks?]

[what did you do after the tv show? Go straight to sleep?]

I hesitated. I wanted to tell her. Needed to tell her. I wanted to excite her by telling her what I had done. [Feel asleep]. I chickened out.

[rly? Nothing else ;)]

[What did you do?]

[A lady never tells ;)]

[Are you a lady?]

[No! lol]

[So...]

[I played with myself, satisfied?]

[Thinking about?]

[Luke Cage]

[lololol. BBC so hot]

[OMG! Tell me what did you do? Sleep rly?]

[No. Thought of you]

[and, tell me]

[played with myself]

[yay! I love having that effect on men. Did you go to my website and do it?]

[Actually no.]

[oh so you just fantasized about me?] I imagined her smirking on her bus.

[Did you about me?]

[Maybe]

I sat on the bus and watched the world go by. I couldn't believe the conversation I was having. She was exciting and fun. I needed this in my life. [I need this]

[Need what]

[this. I enjoy chatting with you. thank you Maggie]

She didn't reply. My bus closed in on the downtown district. I kept glancing at my phone. I sighed. I had probably crossed a line with her. She's probably just looking for a new client; fed up I'm now just a tiring time drain. I felt ashamed of those thoughts. I didn't really think that about her. I had to believe she was better than that and thought better of me.

My bus hit my stop and I got off. I walked towards my building entrance when my phone buzzed. She had replied.

[I do too Dave. Chat l8r?]

I grinned and felt elation. [you bet. Have a great day Maggie]

[you too]

Work was work. Maggie consumed all my thoughts. I nearly texted her a thousand times during the day. I kept glancing at my phone hoping to see a new text from her, but it remained empty. The occasional text from a friend would get my heart pounding.

Work ended and I rode home. I entered my house and made a light salad and went outside for a beer and smoke. I was about to go get another beer when my phone buzzed. It was Maggie.

[want to see what I'm wearing tonight?]

[Yes!]

[dirty perv]

[you started it, how could I say no?]

[okay one sec. Let me selfie]

I waited, my heart rate up. In a moment, my phone buzzed, and her picture loaded in the chat. She was standing in front of the mirror in a bathroom. The top of her head was cut off and I could see her broad smile. She was wearing black lingerie with stockings. Her breasts were straining against her bra and I could see the barest glimpse of her nipples through the lace. Her panties were pulled up high and she had obvious camel toe. Her navel piercing glinted with the flash. She was stunning.

[Holy fuck! You're stunning]

[thank you. It looks alright?]

[omg yes. Love the smile]

[Just the smile?]

[No I like that I can almost see your nipples. Your camel toe is nice too]

[The smile's for you]

[looks genuine]

[Ass, of course it is. I like you Dave]

She likes me! My heart leapt in joy. [I like you too. Your client will need CPR]

[Ugh don't joke. Had that happen once]

[Seriously]

[yeah. Was angina or something, he didn't die]

[worse ways to die]

[huh?]

[I would rather die in some pussy than alone in my house]

[haha, that's a comedy joke or something, right?]

[yeah, I forget the comedian. You look amazing Maggie. Really hot]

[Use it tonight to help you sleep]

[Haha I might]

[maybe send me a pic?]

[Huh?]

[send me a pic]

[of what?]

[Your dick?]

[WTF, I thought chicks HATED that]

[we do but not when we ask for them. When we do ask we want it]

[The D?]

[ha -- you make me laugh]

[And your fucking with me again]

[*you're -- and I'm not. I sent you a pic. Share!]

[When?]

[right now]

[Right now?]

[yeah, I'm feeling pretty sexy right now. Do it!]

[why]

[just do it]

I debated. I had never done this before. I felt really nervous and honestly thought about what harm could happen doing it. Before I knew it, I was upstairs in my bathroom. I dropped my pants and my cock, already hard with the excitement, sprang forward. It was average size but thick. My wife had adored my cock.

Shaking I held my phone up to the mirror, made sure my head was out of the picture and took a snap. It loaded in the messaging app and I looked at it. Nothing behind me revealed anything and my face was cut off above my shoulders. It looked weird seeing a picture of my own dick. I couldn't understand how she would like this. But I felt bold and sent the picture.

I waited. There was no reply. I had a sinking feeling. She was either joking about this or sorely disappointed. I waited and then her reply came in.

[take a close up]

I stared at the text. She wanted a close up? Jesus. It took a little effort, but I took a picture of my dick from the front. It looked obscene to me. I was really hard, and my balls hung low. I looked at the pic and then hit send, feeling disgusted with myself. Have I sunk this low?

I waited for a reply. There was nothing. I waited longer and then realised I had probably just destroyed any chance I had with Maggie. What woman would enjoy that? I read enough on the Internet to know women hated dick pics, no matter what Maggie said.

My phone vibrated and I looked at my screen. Maggie had sent me a picture of her pussy. Up close. It was beautiful, wet, and puffy. I salivated and my cock twitched. It was so hot.

[Jesus, that is so hot] I texted.

[So was yours. You got me so wet, I had to show you]

[Your pussy is beautiful]

[So is your cock, Dave]

[why would you like that?]

[why would you like my pussy?]

[okay that's fair.]

[Can you cum for me? Show me?]

[What, no!]

[Please?]

[Absolutely not]

[coward]

[No, I'm sorry that's too much]

[okay]

I didn't know what else to say. I stared at the picture of her pussy. It was just for me. My own personal picture. I loved it. I was excited and entranced. I wanted more.

[my client will be here soon, wish me luck]

[luck]

[ass]

[bitch]

[wow]

[just kidding]

[I know dummy]

[let me know how it goes]

[Ill text you once hes gone]

[k]

[ciao]

I went into my computer room and sat down. I pulled up Maggie's website and looked at her pictures. Eventually I pulled my cock out, throbbing hard, and dealt with the pressure. I came and cleaned up and went back outside for a beer and smoke.

I wondered how her night was going. I imagined it was me seeing her. Gazing at her. Seeing her spread for me. That guy was one lucky bastard. I wanted to be that guy and then I realised I could never be that guy. I could never book time with her. I had crossed from potential client to something else. Was I friend zoned? Probably, I decided. Except now we exchange naked pictures.

I liked her a lot. She was funny. I felt a connection and realised I needed that more than anything else. I had been searching these past couple of years for exactly this. I was happy.

I looked at my watch. It was nine pm. Her session should be over by now if it was only an hour. I smoked nervously. I started to imagine everything that could go wrong for her. I saw the man hitting her. Hurting her. I felt a rush of anger and I was surprised. I wasn't a knight in shining white armour. I was a public servant and probably couldn't land a punch if I practised for days.

By ten thirty I was pacing in my bedroom. I wanted to go to bed but couldn't until I heard from her. I checked my phone and then opened the messaging app.

[You okay?] I sent.

Her reply came immediately. [Yeah, all good]

[Thank God!]

[what were you worried for me?]

[YES! I've been staring at my phone all night!]

[I'm sorry baby. It went fine. He left right after and understood]

[good]

[ready for tonight?]

I stared at my phone before I replied. [Tonight? What, did we have plans I didn't know about?]

[yes, I'm telling you now. Do you have laptop?]

[Yeees, why]

[Go to bed and bring your laptop. Tell me when you're ready]

[What's going on? Where are you now?]

[In bed with my laptop. Hurry]

I changed in my PJs and grabbed my MacBook. I got in bed and piled pillows behind me. I opened my laptop and then texted Maggie. [Okay ready]

[You have your laptop?]

[Yes]

[Good. Go to Pornhub. Search for Older Man Fucks Dirty Teen Slut. Tell me when you find it.]

[what are we doing?]

[Im horny and my client left me high and dry. I want to cum with you watching the same porn]

My cock stretched hard and thick in a heartbeat. She wanted to watch a porno with me? Who was this woman? [Are you serious?]

[yes. Hold on] I waited and then a picture loaded. It showed a laptop placed on a thick pillow. I could see Maggie's legs and knees bent around the pillow. In the background I could see a dresser with a large tv on it. It looked like a bedroom. On the screen of the laptop was a full screen image of the paused video. [there, see? Hurry up]

I searched the site and found the video, opened it full screen and paused it. The title intrigued me. Our screens looked the same. On a whim I took a picture and sent it. Then I gasped. The blurred image of the head of my cock peeked up from the bottom of the picture. I could see it glistening with my pre-cum. I was mortified.

[wow, that looks delicious. Is that for me?] she sent.

[So sorry, that was a mistake]

[A great mistake. Im soaking wet right now]

[Okay this is weird]

[You find it weird to do sexy things like this? Are you a prude?]

[no]

[okay good, had me worried. When I was with my client, I imagined it was your cock. It helped]

[jesus]

[yours is bigger of course. The poor man.]

[um thanks?]

[what you have a lovely cock]

[thanks]

Her reply took a moment to load. She was typing a lot. [okay, I've never done this but thought of it when we watched Jessica Jones. We are going to watch the video and masturbate. Together. I've been so hot waiting for tonight. Soaked my panties all day. Because of you. You make me wet. We're gonna start the video and watch it. I love this video. Its hot. Its also pretty dirty.]

[okay. This is amazing. Never done this before]

[ready?]

[I guess]

[pfft your gonna love this]

[*you're]

[ass. Okay when I send NOW, start the video]

[okay]

[NOW]

I started the video. It was nine minutes long. It involved a younger woman, looking a lot like Maggie, in an older man's house and having sex with him. It was pretty hard-core. Maggie texted me throughout. It made it hard to stroke my cock, but I found myself anxiously awaiting her next text.

[She looks like me]

[yeah]

[Does he look like you?]

He kind of did. Except I was bald with a goatee. I said so.

[Nice, love bald men.]

She texted again. [so bullshit how they got to sex part. She basically just threw herself at him. No build up. Meh. Its good though]

[yup]

[stuck to one word sentences? Your hands busy?]

[yeah]

[Hahah! I'm getting my phone wet]

[jesus]

[Look at those tits! Like them]

[Yeah. Small and perfect]

[They're much smaller than mine and my nips are bigger. You saw my tits on my site?]

[yeah]

[you need to speak more. Use words.]

[I'm kind of busy here]

[Show me your cock]

I didn't hesitate this time. I snapped a pic of my hard cock, the head slick with pre-cum and my hand gripping the base. The video was in the background. I hit send.

After a long moment she sent a pic. It was a close up of her pussy with a small vibrator inserted. Juices could be seen dripping down between her legs. I groaned and let go of my cock to stop me from cumming. I grabbed my phone. [That is so hot. I almost came]

[I did. When I saw your dick all glistening and your hand clamped on it. I came. Really good. Like my vibrator?]

[Yes]

[I'm calling it Dave tonight. Dave fuck me! yeah Dave!]

[you are wonderful] I texted and meant it.

[Thank you kind sir. Good part coming up, watch]

I watched the video. The guy was eating her out from behind. Then he lifted his mouth and attacked her asshole.

[like that?]

[yeah]

[oh good back to one word sentences]

[shut up]

[oo 2 words!]

She texted again. [I really like that]

The man in the video was tonguing her ass. [Having your ass eaten?]

[Yeah. Love it. Do you?]

I almost came again. I fumbled for my phone and smeared pre-cum on the case. My hands were shaking. This was the hottest thing I had ever done. [Yes, a lot]

[good. Shows a healthy appetite for sex. I'm very healthy]

She sent another picture. This time it was a close up of her asshole. She always hid it on her website with smiley faces. This time I could see it clearly. It was perfect. It looked a little wet. I could see her vibrator at the top of the screen sticking out of her pussy. No sooner had the first picture loaded than another one followed. This time the vibrator was in her ass. I could see it stretched out around her anus. It was gorgeous. I was so close to cumming. She was typing something, and I waited. A short video played, and I opened it. It was three seconds of her fucking her ass with the vibrator. I could hear her moan my name.

It was amazing. So hot. So sexual. So raw.

[You like?]

[jesus yes. That is amazing. You're gorgeous]

[You think my asshole is gorgeous?]

[yes]

[Good show me yours]

I fumbled for my phone and after several attempts I managed to take a picture. It looked gross to me. I could see she had texted me during my attempts.

[whats taking so long? Show me!]

I hit send. I can't believe this. This can't be happening.

[oh nice. That's a nice asshole, Dave]

[thanks]

Another pic followed. It was a picture of her right nipple. I could the bottom of her face smiling. Her nipple was hard and jutted out from the bumpy, bright pink of her areola.

[my tits are hard. I'm gonna cum again]

[Please do]

There was a long pause and another short video appeared. I opened it and watched her applying her vibrator to her clit. She was moaning and she climaxed. Her pussy clenched and juices squeezed out.

I had to come. I grabbed my phone and hit record. I aimed the lens at my cock and stroked it. In seconds I came. My cum shot high into the air and landed on the screen of my laptop. I shot three times and cum oozed down from my head over my fingers. I was breathing deeply. I fumbled with the phone, awkward in my left hand, and stopped the recording. I switched to the messaging app, found the video and sent it.

I heard nothing for a long time. I cleaned up with Kleenex and wiped my fingers clean. I glanced at my phone, but it was quiet. I picked it up. [You okay?]

After a moment she replied. [Jesus yes. That made me cum so hard. Thank you Dave.]

[thank you, that was fun]

[it was. Fuck I came so hard. You have that effect on me. Seriously]

[you too]

[Can I ask you a question?]

[Sure]

[why don't you book with me]

I knew why. I didn't want her as an escort. Never that. I wanted something more with her. I could never pay her for sex.

[I can't]

[What why?]

[I could never hire you as an escort. That's never gonna happen]

The phone went quiet. I waited a long time and sent another text. [Hello?]

She didn't reply. I tried again and again and then she blocked me.

I stared at my screen for a long time. She had blocked me. I had no idea why.

I closed my laptop and felt depression hit me hard. I was familiar with it. I had suffered it after my wife died. It took me years to fight my way out of it. Now I descended into its depths and mourned my life.

* * *

It was three weeks before I saw her board the same bus as me. I was startled to see her. I wanted to run up and talk to her but knew it was impossible. Certainly not on a bus. As she came up the stairs, she saw me but of course she had no idea who I was.

I smiled painfully at her and she smiled back. She was so beautiful, and my heart lurched. I wanted to know why she had blocked me. I had re-read our texts and saw nothing. After some soul searching, I decided she probably wanted me as a client and when I turned it down, she shut me out. Her website warned of it. I had thought we had something more, but I had been wrong. The connection I had imagined was torn from me and left me hollow.

She moved past me in the aisle and sat somewhere behind me. I turned and stole a glance and spotted her four seats back. She saw me looking and quirked an eyebrow at me. I blushed and looked forward. This was like a really bad break up.

She knows I'm bald and with a goatee. Thank goodness I have a baseball cap on! I'll die if she recognises me.

Weeks went by. I saw her four more times on the bus. Each time she smiled at me and sat down. She was constantly on her phone, dealing with clients and responding to texts. The pain in my heart was slowly fading, but each time I saw her it renewed in violent force. I fought my depression and was back on medication.

Her effect on me, despite being short-lived, had been massive. She had filled, for a few short days, a massive hole in my well-being. It hadn't been the sexting, although it was significant, it was the connection I had formed. She was a real person and someone I had admired.

One day, I was on the bus sitting beside the window and looking out at the passing scenery. I had my earbuds on listening to Ben Howard. Someone settled down on the seat next to me. I glanced at the legs and saw it was a woman. I ignored her and got lost in the music. I could see in my peripheral vision the woman was texting like mad on her phone.

As a rule, I don't look at the person sitting next to me. It makes me uncomfortable, and I worry they think I'm weird or something. Avoid eye contact is my rule. I made no exception this time.

Bored I pulled out my phone. I checked my emails, checked my banking, and then opened the messaging app. All my contacts were there with the last text. I looked at the last one from Maggie and opened the text. On top of the screen her name was displayed. I re-read the line saying I was blocked and shut the app.

The woman next to me got up and moved away. I didn't look up. I paid no attention. I was remembering Maggie and wishing things has been different. My depression takes many strange forms. Sometimes it makes me want to cry. Today was the day it returned. It's hard to fight it. I felt tears well up, stinging my eyes. I wiped hastily at them, before tears could fall. The music wasn't helping. Small Things from Ben Howard resonated in my ears and I tore my earbuds off and put them away. I sniffed and wiped my nose.

My stop was ahead and when the bus stopped, I rushed down the stairs and out of bus. I wiped at my face and started toward my building. I had taken three steps when I heard my name called out. I stopped and turned around.

Maggie was standing there. She looked furious and she vibrated with rage. I could only stare at her, shocked at her expression. It was full of hate.

"YOU!" she said. "You're Dave!"

I nodded. She had already broken my heart; I was resigned to having her crush it now. I had no idea how I had pissed her off so much. She was furious with me; I could see that. My depression didn't care, it grew deeper. I just wanted whatever she was going to say over with.

The sidewalk emptied of most people and soon we were standing four feet apart. Too many people still remained, and they stopped to watch and stare. I felt exposed.

"You were on my bus! All this time, you KNEW who I was!"

I nodded.

"You were STALKING me!" she hissed.

That surprised me. I shook my head, but she wasn't done.