The Celebrity Cock Club

Then again, she wasn't alone. Four cars had followed her home and now they had her address. She exited the car and ran for the front door while questions were hurled at her. Was she his girlfriend now? Had she left her husband for him? Does your husband approve of this? That was a particularly stupid question, but it got asked a lot over the next few weeks.

It was a little tense when I talked to her folks. "We know what she did. Everybody in the southern half of the country knows. We also know it wasn't her on Facebook. Judging by her actions she isn't that smart, but she was never suicidal. How could you do that to her?"

"Ask her the same question and get back to me."

I had no intention of keeping the kids from her, but I wanted a couple of days to go by for things to settle down. I was staying where Linda was least likely to look for me: the room we'd rented for our romantic interlude. The desk clerk looked at me funny when he checked the records, but he gave me the room for three days.

It was kind of funny to run into my former friends checking out as I was headed to my room to crash. I'd been running on adrenaline and rage and had been awake thirty hours by then.

Dee rushed up to me. "You bastard! Do you have any idea how badly you hurt Linda? All for nothing, just a fantasy she wanted to fulfill. She'd have been just the same when she got home."

"Nope. She was damaged and when I have something damaged, I have two choices. I need to decide whether it's worth fixing and if I think the cost is too high, or get rid of it. Linda damaged our marriage past resurrecting, and it's not worth the emotional cost to repair it."

"I never fucked that hockey player!"

"So then, you admit you met him? I understood you had dinner with him and then went dancing. Even if you didn't fuck him, it was a chance to fulfill a fantasy, wasn't it? Hubby would be upset if you ever told him, but hey, you can get him to forgive you, can't you?"

The rest of her posse was hanging back, but at the mention of the hockey player her husband surged forward. "I'm gonna kick your..."

As I told the bouncer, I don't fight fair. I fight to win. I went for his kneecap and missed but I caught him right where it joined his thigh bone and as he lay writhing in pain, I looked down, then I pointed at the cameras in the hall. "It's all on tape, dude. Your attempt to assault me and my move to defend myself. Mark it as a life lesson and concentrate on what you're going to do with your bitch."

I looked over at my former friends. "I want you to remember this for the rest of your lives. I'll probably be divorced soon, but I'll bet good money I won't be the only one. You need to think about that and make some decisions. I'd wish you luck but honestly I hope your lives blow up as badly as you helped blow up mine."

*****

Despite pleas and then demands, I never spent another night in my old house. Linda was really pissed at first, unable to understand why I was responding the way I did. It just wasn't that big a deal. Yeah, she might have dumped me in about the worst way possible and then spent the night fucking a total stranger, but it was all in the past and it was time to move on. He was famous, for God's sake! It was over now, so why not go back to life as normal?

Truthfully, she had a crush on the asshole that went back to when we lived in Chicago and he played there. I watched the Bears occasionally, and Linda would watch with me. When a charity poster came out with him on the cover, wearing long knit underwear and nothing else, she bought one. It must have been a dream come true when he asked her to dance.

When she figured out I wasn't just going to trot on home like a good boy, she got bitchy. When she got served for divorce, stating adultery as the cause, she went ballistic. Linda ended up making every threat she could think of, but I persevered.

Linda threw herself on my mercy and was surprised I didn't have any. She just barely held on to her job. It was a close thing and it was a long time before her boss said no more than was necessary to her, and it took even longer for his wife to even acknowledge she was in the room.

We were just average people and it would have faded away if it hadn't been for who she fucked. The paparazzi got to the bouncer and waved enough green under his nose until he sang like a canary. There had been at least three more incidents just at that club alone. Mark liked to party. A lot.

I'd be willing to wager that he soon wished he had signed with another team when he left Chicago. The Panthers were a Carolina team, and North Carolina was an Alienation of Affection state. He should have picked a home over the state line. My lawyer advised me to not go after him until the divorce was through, but he, his team and the NFL went into full protection mode.

I answered the door to my new apartment one evening to see a man holding a briefcase. "Sir, I'd like to talk to..."

"Go away." I slammed the door and slid the safety latches into place. He pounded on the door so much I called the cops and they politely asked him to leave. He looked up at the security camera I'd installed and shook his fist before leaving.

Then I got a call from the new owner of the team. He introduced himself and before he could go farther, I stopped him. "Four people in the world have my number. How did you get it?"

He sighed. "Does it really matter? I'd...."

I hung up and went straight to my phone store and demanded a new number. That lasted eight days before I got another call. "Sir, I represent the Go Deep Children's Charity. May I have a moment of your time?"

"I'm sorry, but I already support three charities and don't have the means to get involved with another. You have a good day now."

"Wait, wait! I'm not asking you for a donation. In fact, it's just the opposite. I'm prepared to offer you a goodly sum."

"Why would you want to give me money?"

"Sir, the founder and principal donor is Marc La..."

I hung up again and blocked his number. They got hold of my new email address and sent me long missives about how my actions had hurt the charity and how deeply donations had dropped. I couldn't help but reply, and called them.

"So it's my fault the charity is suffering? How, exactly?"

"Your allegations against Marc have tarnished his reputation and are causing him undue duress. If you would publicly say you forgive him and your wife for their momentary lapse of judgement and allow him to make amends, it would drop off the public's interest."

"Let me get this straight. The man seduced my wife. In front of me and about fifty witnesses, and a low-level thug he was paying off tried to stop me when I tried to go after them. She stayed the night, and while she won't admit she had sex with him, we all know that's what happened. I tell you what, have him make a public statement saying he had sex with my wife even though he knew she was married, and I'll think about it."

"That would be in no one's best interest. Can't we persuade you to let sleeping dogs lie?"

"This ol' hound ain't sleepin'. He's snarling and foaming at the mouth, just dyin' to take a hunk out of somebody's ass. Tell you what, get him to donate all his money to a scientist to make a form of time travel, go back and unfuck my wife and we'll talk. In the meantime, if he thinks it's bad now, wait a few days. Don't ever contact me again."

"What do you..."

I talked to Eric and Nannette, bitching about the inability to slam a cellphone down. It gave them an idea and they invented an app that allowed you to do just that. It was the sound of an old-fashioned phone crashing down and could be used when you wanted to hang up on someone. I bet a lot of telemarketers got an unpleasant surprise over the next few months. They trademarked it or patented it, or whatever it was you do to keep other people making money off it. They charged a dollar to download, it and they included me in the paperwork saying that while it was their expertise it was my idea. Thirty-three cents isn't much until you multiply it fifty thousand times just in the first two months. Then it turned into serious money.

I used it to get an actual house instead of the apartment I was living in, and the kids were happy about that. It broke my heart to leave them, but every time I looked at her it was all I could do not to kill her on the spot.

The poor woman was delusional, seriously delusional. She thought I'd just accept what she did and go on with our lives. Her favorite refrain was: "It was one night!"

"Yes, it was. One night too many. Tell me the truth; you knew I would never allow it to happen if I found out early enough, that's why you had your slut friends run interference, so you could slip away with your man-whore like a thief in the night, because that was what you were. A thief. You stole our future that night, Linda. And you have no one to blame but yourself and your celebrity cock. Think he's hurting? Fuck no he isn't hurting. He's probably laughing about it as we speak. He didn't give a damn if he destroyed a family as long as he got some free pussy, pussy you were more than willing to supply."

She was reeling. I hardly ever raised my voice in anger, certainly never to or in front of the kids. Looking back, I don't think I ever did it to her either. Maybe that was the problem. She thought I was weak and would be terrified she'd leave me. If push came to shove, she'd use the kids to keep me in line.

The children did not take it well. Eventually I put them into therapy and it started helping. The therapist was careful to not denigrate their mother. She did tell them their mother had made a very bad error in judgement and was reaping the consequences. She invited us to take part in a couple of sessions separately, and since I was paying, I got a summation of the sessions.

"She's still in denial and is telling the children that while she did do something, it wasn't bad enough for you to divorce her over. Your little girl asked her point blank what she did and she told her it was an adult thing and she would understand in a few years. Your son is only four, but he remembers what he sees and hears on media outlets. She never directly answered his questions, just telling him she had made a terrible mistake and she was trying her best to fix it. I don't think he bought it and has a lot of hostility towards his mother."

I was asked the same questions in my session and I answered them as honestly as I could. "Yes son, I'm divorcing your mother because of what you heard. She broke a promise and a commitment by doing that. You know when you promise something, you should keep it. It goes a little deeper when you're an adult. She made those promises in front of 200 people and in a legally and spiritually binding way, and she knew well what would happen if she broke them. She did it anyway. I still love your mother but I no longer trust her, and trust is the key issue here. Say I promised to pick you up from school on Wednesdays and did for a year. Then I missed one and left you standing. I knew I was supposed to pick you up but decided I wanted to do something else more? How many times would you stand there waiting for me before you realized you couldn't trust me to pick you up? Would you trust me when I told you it would never happen again?"

I think I got through to them a bit and followed the therapist's instruction to the letter. I didn't say bad things about their mother, told them even though our relationship had changed, we both loved them very much. Other than that, I didn't talk about their mother unless they brought it up.

Linda did the exact opposite. She told the kids that yes, she had made a bad mistake, but it wasn't bad enough to end the marriage. She told them I was just being stubborn and things would work out.

The therapist was beyond angry and confronted her is a meeting. "How could you do that to your children? Your husband shows no inclination to reconcile. In fact, in one of our sessions he talked to the kids about divorce. They have had enough classmates in the same situation to get a basic understanding of how things work. They've also watched enough parents remarry to know sometime in the future there may be someone new in their life. Your children believe, rightly I might add, that your relationship with your husband is over. I know you've talked a few times, but it hasn't worked and I think I understand why. You still refuse to think you did anything wrong, at least wrong enough to get divorced over. I strongly suggest couples counseling. I don't believe it will help you reconcile, but maybe it will lead to a place where you can accept how things are and move on. I won't be seeing you for any more sessions. Thank you for attending the ones I asked for."

It didn't make a dent in Linda's world, except the remark about counseling. Her lawyer was pretty good and the judge mandated eight sessions. If the therapist thought after four sessions there was no way forward, she could terminate any further sessions. On the other hand, if she saw progress, she could add more sessions. My lawyer tried to shut me up, but I stood and asked the judge if I could speak. He nodded, warning me to keep it civil.

"Your Honor, I need to be clear here. I have zero interest in any further relationship with my wife beyond that of coparents to our children. That being said, I will participate in the sessions. What I absolutely refuse to do is attend more than eight. That should be the sufficient number to resolve any issues we have. I'm serious, Your Honor. Yes, you can put me in jail or fine me, or both if I refuse, but you need to think about this. This divorce is getting a lot of media attention and I'm sure you don't want it to turn into a quagmire of mudslinging, and I for one am more than happy to talk to the press. One more thing, Your Honor. I want her lover to attend one session and explain why he thinks sleeping with married women is such a good idea and why he thinks it shouldn't affect my marriage. Thank you, sir."

My lawyer was looking at me like I had grown two heads and the Judge looked like he didn't know whether to laugh or throw me under the bus. Linda looked like she was going to be physically ill any second, and her lawyer seemed to be trying to find something to object to. Finally, he rapped his gavel twice. "I don't have the authority to send him to a marital counseling session if it isn't his marriage. I will draft a letter asking him to consider it, but I wouldn't hold out much hope. What your lawyer can tell you is it is perfectly legal to require him to appear here in court, but that is totally up to you. Counselors, submit a list of therapists or get one from the court, but I want all parties agreed and the sessions to commence in two weeks. I will also require that there be two sessions a week. That way this can be over much sooner than later. If either of your clients miss a session, I won't threaten them with jail. I'll just declare the session valid and they won't be able to reschedule. So ordered. Bailiff, let's begin the next case."

Linda was not pleased. Not at all. She was waiting for me at my car with a determined look on her face. "This has to stop! Please! This wasn't what I intended to happen at all."

I felt like it was a bad idea without our lawyers present to talk to her, but curiosity got the better of me. "Just for the sake of conversation, what did you think was going to happen?"

"I thought you'd be pissed but love me enough to get over it. It was one night! All the years we were together, our family, our kids, it wasn't worth throwing away for one night!"

"It wasn't just one night. It was every night for the rest of our lives after that night. What you did was cold, calculated and the ultimate in disrespect. You left me looking like a fool in front of our supposed friends, and some of them even helped you slip out the back like a slut. I would have bet my life on your love for me and our children before that night, Linda. Not any more. We're done, and all the counseling in the world won't fix it. I'll see you at the first session."

"Wait! I need a favor."

"What possible favor could you ask of me?"

It's about Marc. Could you please let up on him a little? It's starting to affect his charities. Think of the children!"

"You mean like you and he thought of ours that night? I could give a fuck less about his charities and I promise you very soon his charities will be the least of his problems. Mind telling me how you know this?"

She had enough guilt to look down. "He called me."

"Really? How did he get your number?"

Her face got redder and it hit me. "You gave it to him that night, didn't you Why? In case he wanted a repeat performance?"

"That's not so. I don't know why I gave it to him; I just did. I should have known you wouldn't help."

I just laughed and got into my car, marveling how stupid she had become. Maybe he had a magic cock after all, one long enough to reach all the way up and scramble her brains.

While all this was going on I was subject to a pressure campaign, trying to force me to be 'reasonable'. The league, the team, every organization aligned with football, his charities, a few sports talk shows, all pressured me to let it drop. Even my boss, a big fan of the team, pushed me a little. I responded by getting another job. I think he realized too late how I would probably react and how it would look to everyone else in our organization and the public. He tried to backpedal and keep me in the fold, but it was too late. I wonder how pissed he was over the complaint I lodged with corporate HR. I had a feeling his future was toast there and decided it couldn't happen to a more deserving individual.

It got so bad I started recording every conversation I had. I didn't tell the first few, but after that I did and that led to some pretty short conversations. The sportscaster we'd called the night the whole mess started had me on his radio show. It was his top ranked show in terms of listenership, and I dropped a few bombs, snippets of conversation I'd had with various people. The one with the team owner was a big hit. He called in, outraged and threatening to sue me. The sportscaster had all he could do to refrain from laughing.

"You can't see him, but my guest is nodding his head yes. He even seems a little eager. Anything you'd like to say?"

He nodded when the mike was on and the first thing I did was laugh. "What are you going to sue me for? Telling the truth? I checked, and in this state, it is perfectly legal to record your conversations without informing the person to whom you're speaking. It's called "one party consent." Plus, it is not my intent to use the conversation in any legal matter, unless you push it. My lawyer says we have a good case against you, the team in general, and the national league for harassment and undue mental anguish. Still got something you need to say?"

He hung up. The show got picked up by several syndicated programs and briefly made the national news. I never heard another word from them.

Mr. Marc found himself being ignored by the press unless someone wanted to ask about the divorce. He was used to being treated like a hero and being in the limelight, and it frustrated him badly. Even though his lawyers told him to say nothing and be careful, he finally snapped and did something stupid. He came after me at my home.

The first thing I had done was put a state-of-the-art security system in when I got my new house. Ironically, it was one he touted in ads for the company and he was right, it was worth the cost.

There was a knock on the door one night, and when I looked on my phone, the doorbell camera showing three really large men standing on my porch. They did not look happy. I had my children with me, so I hit the silent alarm fob that automatically alerted the police. They called immediately. You'd be amazed how many people trigger it by accident.