The Deal Ch. 03

Mike said almost nothing after I got him off, with a lot of help from him jerking his cock straight into my mouth. After he came, he told me, "You are going to have to get better at that before you start dating." Then he started the truck and drove back to my apartment, unceremoniously pulling up in front of my apartment and putting the truck into park.

"What are you waiting for, cocksucker? A goodnight kiss?" Mike asked mockingly. "Get the fuck out."

I shuddered at his sharp tone and slowly pulled the handle to open the door and got out of the truck. Even though I really just wanted to get inside my apartment, lock the door, and try to pretend other people didn't exist, I was moving slowly, feeling weak from all the humiliation and embarrassment I'd gone through in the previous couple of hours.

Mike just watched as I closed the door and walked slowly to my apartment, looking so scared as my eyes looked left and right, hoping none of my neighbors would see me. That was a true walk of shame as I got out of a man's truck in very short jeans cut-offs, cum smeared all over my face.

No one saw me, or at least I didn't see anyone as I walked to my apartment. Once inside, I quickly locked the door. Without putting on any lights, I quietly crept across the floor, changed out of my short shorts and sneakers, and put on my pajamas and got into bed.

After turning the television on, I stared blankly at the screen. My body was still trembling, and I felt like I was in a state of shock. Then, as I recalled how humiliated I'd felt walking through the mall, my little penis got very hard. The last thing I wanted to do was masturbate, but my hand kept going to my cock, so I took off my pajama pants so I could look at my beautiful tanned legs.

"My legs are so hot," I panted as I tugged at my dick with my right hand while running my left hand up and down along my smooth thigh. "It felt so good showing you off," I gasped as I recalled the walk through the mall and the mean comments people made and the looks they gave me.

"Check of this faggot," I heard one young man tell another as they were walking towards Mike and I. "What the fuck," his friend laughed as they looked at me, walking nervously in my Daisy Dukes.

"I'm so pathetic," I sighed, "All I want to do is suck cock and show off my legs to men... show off my legs to men... suck cock... lick balls... mmm... I love balls in my mouth... cock is SO good..."

That was all I needed to have a body shaking orgasm as my tiny dribble of very thing and clear semen came out of me.

After wiping myself up, I dropped back on my bed and began sobbing again, as I whined and cried, "Why do I like it so much? Why do I want Mike to make me do these things? Why? Why can't I stop?"

There was always the feeling that there was nothing in the future for me. I'd barely graduated high school, flunked out of community college, and worked doing data entry and electronic receiving in a warehouse. There I kept my head down and did what I was told, always afraid of disappointing my supervisor or my managers. I'd probably never quit, I was too afraid of making people mad at me if I did, so as long as they kept me I'd likely be there the rest of my life.

With no friends, and no family that was really speaking to me as they always accused me of calling because I needed money. That just made me feel like more of a failure, because I always needed money, and while my father was rich, he was as tight-fisted with a dollar as they come.

This was what I had, and it made me feel like even more of a loser than I'd ever felt like. I'd never had a girlfriend, and now who could possibly want me? My dependency on Mike as my lifeline out of loneliness and despair continued to grow.

Friday night, as I gave into my craving and called Mike less than an hour after coming home from work, he told me he had other plans. As a result, I spent Friday alone in my small apartment, staring out the window and afraid to go outside. Even with long pants on, there was too much chance of running into someone who had seen me at the mall. It was safer to stay inside where no one could taunt me or beat me up. Without Mike to protect me, it was too scary.

The next day I jumped across the room to answer the phone when it ran at one o'clock Saturday afternoon. It was Mike, as I hoped it would be, and I was panting from jumping across the room when I said "Hello."

"You feel like getting some dick this afternoon, sexy legs? You'll have to go out shopping with me first," he said with a snicker. "Same shorts, but this time we'll be out longer and we're going to more stores. Get changed for me, Keithy, I'll be over in about a half hour."

He hung up without waiting for a response and I sat there, on the edge of my bed, in shock. Yes, I wanted his cock something crazy, but I couldn't handle another trip out in my Daisy Dukes with people staring at me and muttering comments. Why couldn't we just stay in my apartment and I could dress up sexy for Mike and suck his cock for him. It drove me crazy being out in public dressed like that. It was humiliating to the point where it aroused me, and the combination was enough to cause me to completely submit to Mike to the point where I probably would have knelt down and sucked him off right in the middle of the mall if he told me to.

"Make eye contact with people," Mike said to me at the mall whenever there was no one in direct earshot. "And stop with the sniveling and crying. Smile at the people. Keith, you not only look like a cocksucker in those shorts, you ARE a cocksucker and you need to own up to that."

That wasn't anything I could have debated, even if I was brave enough to try to debate Mike on anything. Those public walks, dressed like that, accompanied by a man, would eventually lead to us running into people I knew from work. Those encounters were like gold to Mike as he watched me first freeze in terror, and then stammer my way through ridiculous excuses for being dressed that way.

There was eventually nowhere I could go where I could disappear like used to whenever I was around people. Everywhere I went, people knew me as the guy with the legs who sucks dick.

It was just Mike for the first couple of weeks. He was grooming me, teaching me how to be a top notch cocksucker, and breaking down any lasting resistance or dreams of resistance I had so that when it came to men in my life, all the mattered to me was making them happy with me by pleasing them orally as best I could.

The first time he brought a friend with him was on a Thursday night. I wasn't expecting extra company, had put on a sexy pink teddy Mike had bought for me, along with a lovely pair of clear, platform mule heels I could just slip in and out of. I sat waiting for him, and it seemed the longer we went on seeing each other the longer it would take for him to come over. When his knock came, I went to the door with my nervous and anxious smile and saw Mike standing there with his friend J.J..

J.J. was even more buff than Mike and looked like he could have been in fitness competitions. He was wearing one of those muscle shirts, and it really showed off his super strong biceps, and standing there with Mike I quickly felt very, very inferior as a man. Nervous and twitchy as always, I stepped back carefully as the two men walked into my apartment.

"Think you can take care of my friend, J.J., Keith? I've been telling him about what a nasty, hungry, pansy-ass cocksucker you are, so don't disappoint me."

"I... uh... yes... sir..." I was trembling. Oh my god, they were so big and strong and I knew I had to do what they said because they could really hurt me if they wanted to.

"Get on your knees, Keith," J.J. snapped at me. "I need to get home to my wife before she starts pissing and moaning about me being out all night again. Come on, suck me, you faggot bitch," he went on to say as he undid his belt and slid his pants down his legs.

My lips were quivering as I turned my head slowly towards Mike, trying to say something and just making a little squeak as he told me with an annoyed sigh, "Do as you're told, Keith. This is who you are. Stop trying to convince yourself it isn't."

I looked back over at J.J., who had sat back down after removing his shoes and pants. He sat there with his very muscular thighs spread and half a boner, half a big boner, sat waiting for me between them.

Resigned but incredibly willing, I knelt slowly down in front of J.J. and put my hands on his strong, manly thighs. "You... have... beautiful... legs..." I chirped out in a high-pitched voice. They were beautiful, far more beautiful than the legs of any of the women I'd lusted after in the past.

"Why don't you just suck my dick, faggot," J.J. grunted at me as I knelt there, feeling his muscular thighs and gently kissing them as I moved towards his cock, which was now starting to stiffen to its full size. It was calling to me, as were the nice big and heavy balls hanging below it.

It was like heaven and hell all mixed into one. At times I tried to rationalize what I did with Mike as just a one-time exploration or a little adventure before I moved on to having a girlfriend and then a wife and family like everyone else. When that happened, people would like and respect me. The reason I would always tear up as I was about to suck Mike's cock, and now J.J.'s, was because each time I gave a man a blowjob I felt further away from my dream, and how would I ever get anyone to respect me if this was what I did every night?

Mike had brought his biggest, strongest, and most well hung friend to be my second cock. He knew I could never resist a very thick, very juicy, nine and a half inches of pure man meat attached to a very muscular man.

"You... has..." I couldn't stop stuttering as I slowly stroked J.J.'s cock and looked up at him for approval as I kissed and licked his cock. "You... have... beau... ti... ful...:

At that point, I exploded, quickly taking his cock into my mouth, shifting my position on my knees so I could really get going, and then letting him grab my head and face fuck me fast and hard. My face felt warn, I was crying like a baby, choking and gagging as J.J. forced his whole cock into my mouth and down my throat. With each thrust I felt like my eyes were going to shoot out of my head.

"Get used to it, Keith," I heard Mike saying in his authoritative voice as J.J. worked me as hard as his could, and with his strong, powerful arms he was able to work me very hard and I most definitely learned the art of breathing through my nose that day.

When he finished, wanting to shoot his load on my face, I looked up at him passively as he gave his cock a few fast and hard strokes and then blew a nice thick load all over my face. He rubbed it all around my cheeks and forehead with his cock as he moaned, and then pushed me over to Mike while he put his pants back on, called me a "sick little faggot," and then told Mike he was leaving.

"Yeah, well, my first time getting head from a guy, and let me tell you, Keith, you suck at sucking cock," he said with a tone of total disgust as he walked out.

What J.J. said hit me with unexpected force. Yes, I'd only started sucking cock two weeks before, but I thought I was at least good at it. There was nothing else I was particularly good at, except maybe for having legs like a girl, and if I wasn't good at that then what good was I at all?

"Well, you just need more practice," Mike said as he told me to lay my head on his lap. He could see I was now completely overwhelmed. On top of my inner struggle over what I was doing in the first place, I was now trying to process the idea that maybe I wasn't even any good at sucking cock.

"Do... I... please... you?" I stammered quietly as I rested my head on Mike's lap and he stroked my hair like I was a Pomeranian.

"As long as you keep trying to do better, to develop better skills for keeping men happy sexually, I am happy with you. Now, why don't you take my pants off and give me a blowjob. I'll talk you through it and give you tips, and then maybe we'll find some videos for you to watch of faggots like you sucking dick so you can learn some things. You want to be a good cocksucker, don't you, Keith?"

Lifting my head up as I came up off his lap and began undoing his pants, I looked up at Mike, swallowed hard and said, "Yes I do, sir."

"Now, some men are going to want you to take it slow, so they can really enjoy your mouth, but others, like J.J. want it quick and fast. J.J. has a girlfriend and it so happens she doesn't suck dick, so I told him you could take care of him. You'll have to learn when you start dating men how they like it because you always want to give them what they want. It is all about pleasing your man, Keith."

"Yes, sir," I said quietly as I got his pants and shoes off.

"Now, I want you to take it slow so I can talk you through it and tell you what I want and how you can do better. Your tongue and lips should both be always enjoying my cock and your throat needs to be more willing. That will come it time, but when it comes to being blown by a faggot in drag, men will want to deepthroat you. With someone like you, they're going to want to make it rough. You understand?"

"Yes, sir," I said meekly. "I'll do better, sir."

My life began to revolve completely around wanting to give the best head in the city. I watched all kinds of blowjob videos, with both men and women doing the sucking. I bought a dildo to practice on and Mike came over almost every night. On Saturday he would bring a friend. After J.J. there was Todd, Jim, and Neil. Of the three, Todd was a one-timer like J.J., Jim who was a sworn straight guy, would call me drunk late at night when he'd failed to score and come over for a blowjob. I never said "no." Neil would become a regular, saying he was openly bisexual but only as far as getting his dick sucked.

That led to the day I was walking down to the mailbox and ran into Bob for the first time in months. In the past he'd planned to run into me and was now avoiding me, but he happened to pull into the parking lot and get out of his car as I was coming around the corner.

He approached friendly enough, very casually saying "hello" and asking how I was doing. After the exchange of pleasantries, Bob smiled and said, "You still have those incredibly sexy legs. I'm sorry if I was out of line..."

"No, I was just scared," I told him, my voice wavering as I worked up the courage to tell Bob that I would love to dress up for him and then I would "make sure he didn't leave disappointed."

I liked Bob and had enjoyed meeting him the first time. The fact that he enjoyed my legs and wanted me sexually, combined with thinking he was a nice guy I could be friends with, I got the idea that maybe I could have a normal gay relationship with him and leave Mike and the other guys behind. Being a gay man with a partner felt normal, and it wouldn't be too embarrassing for people to find out, at least compared to them finding out I sucked all kinds of dick all the time.

That day I would learn the difference between myself and a gay man. As much as I liked Bob, I felt no emotional or romantic connection with him. All I wanted was his dick, and as I sucked him it made me cringe that he was talking dirty but respectfully to me. He even said, "You don't have to do this," as I reached down into his pants and felt his erection.

"Please, I need you to talk nasty to me, tell me what a pathetic cock sucking faggot I am..." I said as I teared up, realizing that his being nice to me was preventing me from getting into giving him head. It no longer interested me, and I'd lost the erection I'd gotten from Bob running his hands up and down my legs and then kissing my thighs and calling them "gorgeous."

I had no "feelings" for any of these men, even Bob, who I truly wanted to be friends with. All I wanted was for men to put me on my knees and make me suck their cocks while treating me like the pathetic, weak, sniveling wimp I was. It was now the only thing that turned me on. I'd completely stopped looking at women except when one was wearing an outfit I wanted to wear myself and it was the outfit I was looking at, not her. Instead, I found myself sneaking glances at men's crotches, looking for signs of juicy man meat moving around and needing attention. When I imagined just getting down and sucking random guys in public I would start giggling.

It took a while, but as I went on telling Bob he was going to be the fifth guy I'd sucked off that month and that I liked taking on two men at a time, he finally grabbed my head and told me, "Shut the fuck up already and suck my cock you slut."

Bob would be the last guy for a long time that I would hook up with who liked me or seemed to want to get to know me as a person. It was a total turn-off for me to be treated that way, to be asked if I wanted dick rather than being reminded that it was what I lived for, and for any man to allow me to be tentative when it came to pleasing him.

"My mouth is a dick hole," I told Bob through my tears, still wanting his friendship but needing and wanting him to degrade me and treat me like dirt.

It didn't take him long to get off after that, and he pulled back suddenly as I attempted to hold onto his cock so I could swallow his load. He jerked back in the chair as he came, pulling out of my mouth, smacking against my nose, and shooting his cum directly up into my eyes and my forehead and hair.

"Fuck," he gasped after collecting himself. "I figured with you walking around like you do that you liked the dick, but damn, you really like the dick, don't you? Fuck."

I wasn't sure whether to take that as a compliment on my cock sucking skills or as an insult to how I was now sucking cock almost every day and with different men. It would bring me back to tears as I watched Bob getting unceremoniously dressed and meekly asked, "We can be friends... and... we can... this..."

"Keith, you know, I have plenty of friends and honestly, I enjoyed meeting you and talking with you, but that wasn't what I was looking for with you. I mean, damn, you have great legs, but I mostly saw you as a chance to get a good blowjob, but don't worry. I'll be seeing you again and I'll let you suck my dick again."

"Do you want to... hang out... listen to some... music..." I said pathetically as Bob started towards the door. "I mean... if you..."

"Keith, don't embarrass yourself," Bob said with a sigh as he walked out. "I'm not looking for a friend, just the benefits."

It probably sounds pathetic, but I had so hoped that Bob and I could be friends. I'd never really had a friend before, no more than a kid or two in my class growing up who would talk to me sometimes at lunch. He was much kinder than Mike, but as he left that night I realized he'd only ever wanted one thing from me and it wasn't friendship. And yeah, I guess I am pathetic because I so hoped he'd be someone I could hang out with, talk to, listen to music with, go out to clubs with, and all he really saw when he saw me with my short shorts and my silky smooth legs was "free blowjob."

It wasn't like I was anything else, but it hit me at that moment that men weren't going to want to be friends with me and hang out. I was still that pathetic guy that everyone either picked on or felt sorry for, I just had sexy legs and gave guys head, and that was all they wanted from me.

All I could do was get used to it. Mike would call. Bob would come by. At work I became even quieter and more jumpy. Mike was taking me out in public twice a week, pushing the envelope as he took me out in spandex cheerleader shorts one time and paraded me around downtown. The fear that someone at work would see me and call me out at work was all I could think about.