The Devil's Gateway Ch. 02

No need to say that we were all in tears by this time as Liv went on talking.

"They have traditions that they've borrowed from other religions—many of them pagan like Christmas and Easter to name a couple—as well as habits of how to look holy, as the upper heirarchy of many churches do in the wearing of the miter, those dunce-like caps that the priests of the ancient god Dagon of the Philistines and others wore. They love looking so good, so holy, but love, if it's not as they think it should be, that's not good. They're hypocrites, we're not, but they consider themselves right, and us wrong. There's something wrong with this scenario.

"There are too many false Zeitgeists that have morphed in too many ways, and too many falsities to be from the word of a real god.

"Ladies, I urge you to do one thing, and that is to learn. And when you learn, and are less troubled by being as you know you are, and that you know you are quite normal in every respect, if you meet someone who is in need as you were, if she will listen, pass on your knowledge and help a sister out of the misery they have pushed her into.

"I've more than enjoyed this class, and Paula has too. That's the truth, for she has told me that since she came and met all of you. Believe it or not, you've helped her a lot, and in helping her, you've also helped me, and I thank you. And please, trust your reasoning, what you connect, and use Sola Veritas as you learn."

There were so many different feelings shooting through me as Liv ended. She'd taught us much, helped us much—especially Caryn who was much as Paula was—and set us all to wondering and wanting to learn more.

We waited until most of the others had left, then we went to them.

"Liv, we'd like to ask you to come to the club we always go to on Friday evenings, The Kitten's Korner. Do you know about it, or have you been there before?" Ariel asked, but often looked at Paula as did Caryn.

"Yes, I know about it, and frankly, I'd thought about going there and exposing Paula to a club of just about all lesbians, but I guess it just slipped past, we've been so busy."

"Then you have to come and sit with us," Caryn said happily, hopeful now that they would. "We have a wonderful group we sit with, and there are only a few baddies in the club, but they don't bother us for the most part. And we know someone who'd love to talk to you," she pushed it.

"Oh, and why's that?" Liv asked, her interest real.

"Jabs," Sally said. "She's our science brain, and she loves to talk science and such, but most of us can't hold a candle to her, so the poor little thing is so lonesome for intellectual comfort," she lied through that huge smile that said she was putting them on.

"Yeah, I bet," Liv said, looking pointedly at Sally's smile.

"Actually, Jabs would love meeting with both of you, and I think you'd love meeting Jabs and the rest of our group. Jabs is interesting, and more, she's a real sweetheart as all of those in our group are. Ariel and Caryn are the newest of the group, and they love everyone there," I said very seriously.

"They're telling the truth, Liv," Mary got her two cents worth in. "We'd love to have you, and maybe learn more from you too, but mostly we'd love to just talk to you both."

"Okay, so some of us feel a special attachment to the love of your life, Paula, and we want to see more of both of you," Ariel said, a cute grin on her face along with a blush she shared with Caryn and Paula.

"Well, baby, what do you say?" Liv asked Paula.

"I think I'd love to go," Paula said.

That settled it, and we were happy, but not as Caryn, Ariel, and Paula were.

Chapter 16

I'm not sure why we were like little children at the thought of Liv and Paula probably coming to our club, but it was as if Santa Claus was coming early. Maybe it was the hope they gave all of us, the sense of something that proved we were normal, and more, that no one should look down their noses at us. Even our love was exciting in a new way. To be honest, all of it surprised me.

* * * *

"Do you think they'll show up?" Ariel asked anxiously.

It was still early; in fact, we'd just arrived but a few scant minutes before.

"They'll be here," Mary said.

"Boy, you guys are sure excited," Jabs kidded with us.

"You'll love them, Jabs," Caryn added, then, "Oh, look, there they are."

We all stood and waved them over to us. Jade gave us a look of curiosity when we told her we'd probably be adding a table if it was okay with her. She just pursed her lips, smiled, and nodded. We made sure to have space next to Jabs for Liv, and Ariel to sit next to Paula. Caryn and I were opposite them, along with Mary.

The greetings were warm just as we'd told them they would be as they met everyone and took and gave hugs and kisses all around. It wasn't long before Jabs and Liv were in some deep discussions. In the meantime, we all danced with Paula, and getting Liv to break it up with Jabs for a minute, most of us danced with Liv too; even Jabs danced with Liv and Paula. At one point, we suddenly paid attention to Liv after Jabs had been talking her favorite subject, physics.

"That's interesting."

"Yes, I think so. Phase transition has been vastly overlooked."

Liv was thoughtful for a minute. "That's like saying that we all have many crucibles—points in our lives—where we're faced with making important decisions, we might go either way, and much of it is chance," Liv said.

"That's right. In science, if I read it right, when ever anything in physics is in transition, there's a point at which it is both this way and that way, or maybe in phase both ways at the same time. Maybe uncertainty comes into play here," Jabs said.

Liv thought again. "So, like when all of that religious stuff was so pumped into Paula's head, and then it fought with something in her that said she's lesbian, she hit a point where she was both ways at the same time?"

"That's how I think it is. Saying that there are many crucibles in our lives is how it is in my opinion, and more, I think all high school students should be taught that so they know. As far as I can see, it's the perfect definition of confusion in our lives, of chaos for many of us."

Caryn had been listening as were many others. As I said, sometimes when Jabs talked, we all listened until we couldn't understand it, then tuned her out. That wasn't the case this time.

"So when I had my troubles tossing me around so much when I met Penny, and before that too, I was at a crucible, you say, a point where I was both accepting my love of Penny and my habit of wanting to be as I was taught?" Caryn asked.

"That sounds about right," Jabs said. "There are many times when we think of going against what we know, or suspect we know, and we're literally on both sides, living both ways, accepting and denying both ways, and simultaneously. Our conscious minds make the simultaneous moment last longer than a moment," she grinned.

"That sounds like it was with me," Paula said quietly. "I think I had some very long moments," she emphasized very.

"Yeah, me too," Caryn said.

"We do know how to punish ourselves, don't we?" Jabs said.

"Hmm, this science stuff is kinda good to know," Liv said with a grin.

"I hear you taught some of it in your classes, so I guess it is," Jabs agreed, her own grin as wide and friendly as Liv's.

It was then that I noticed that everyone was listening, and it started a discussion, or mostly questions about it all that lasted quite a while. I'd never thought about there being any dynamics like this crucible thing where we were both ways, in a phase transition as Jabs put it. It had always just been choose this or that. Worse, or maybe better, how you were trained, or how rebellious you were at the moment, made the odds tilt one way or the other. That made it a thing of the moment, I thought. Maybe that's what made it all drawn out in us, leading to confusion as Jabs said. I had to think about it. Jabs could really strain your mind.

The thing was, though, that Liv and Jabs were getting along famously. Paula, however, didn't pay undue attention to their conversation until then. Before that, and afterwards, we kept her to ourselves.

After some drinks, a lot of talking and dancing, it was time to go. We all pretty much left at the same time—well, it was that or get thrown out. Hugs and kisses were everywhere, but Jabs stayed with us to the last moment. Her hug with Liv, as well as with Paula, was longer than usual. We were right, they did hit it off.

"Will you two be coming back again?" Ariel asked anxiously.

"Yes, I think so," Liv said, looking at Paula who was nodding noticeably, and smiling broadly.

* * * *

Liv and Paula did return to the club, and that's how it was for a few months, even when Liv had another class. Jabs even had them over for dinner one Saturday, and invited Sally and Ariel, as well as Caryn and myself, and Mary and a few others too. She had a pretty big house, and had some catering type food for us all, as well as drinks and music so we could dance.

Sally's and Ariel's house couldn't accommodate that many people, but they wanted to have Liv and Paula over, as well as Mary, Caryn and me too, plus Jabs who was turning out to be Liv's best friend, or so it seemed since they were always in deep conversation.

We were developing a mini group with Mary, Jabs, along with Paula and Liv. We all got along famously, and our friendships kept deepening, especially Jabs and Liv, and Paula with Ariel and Caryn. Mary's friendship with Sally and me also deepened. Our lives were as good as they come.

It wasn't long after that when Caryn decided to come out to her parents. She felt strong enough, and I thought she was too. Liv and Paula had helped her mental and emotional strength.

"Want me to go with you?" I asked, hoping she'd say yes, but whatever she felt best, I'd abide by it.

"I'd love to have you with me if only to show them how happy we are, and how good of a choice I made in loving you, but... Penny, I don't think we'd go over too good. In fact, I'm not sure I'll go over at all. I'm set on them telling me that they disown me. If they do, I know I'll cry, but that's up to them. Please say that's okay with you."

She knew her family, and I didn't knew them at all, so what could I say other than good luck.

Caryn took off on Friday, and called me before she went to her parents home just to let me know she'd arrived safely. I could hear the worrying in her voice; I was worried too.

The next day, about mid-afternoon, I got a call from Caryn; she'd been crying.

"I'll be there this evening. Can you pick me up?"

When I picked her up at the airport, her face was long.

"They didn't like it. Neither of them. My mother hollered the most, but my father's face was red as could be, but not from embarrassment—he was angry."

"Did they ask you to leave?" I asked as gentle as I could.

"No, but it was obvious. I did get a hug from my mother, but it was more of a touch than anything. My father was no where to be found, not that anyone was looking for him."

"How do you feel about it?" I asked, once again, very carefully.

"Sad, but it's their choice; I made mine, and there's no way I'll be leaving you anytime soon, if ever," she said stubbornly, and actually did manage to smile.

"I'd hug and kiss you, but I don't think I better let go of the wheel," I smiled with her.

"Yeah, don't let go of the wheel. You can give me a hug and kiss when we get home, just step on it, will you?" This time she grinned.

It was a whale of a hug and kiss when we got home. We made it to the bedroom without tripping over anything, and tore each other's clothes off, and resumed our kissing and hugging. It was the wildest sex we'd had yet, wilder even than when we first started and couldn't wait after work. We didn't wait this time either.

"Wow! That's a greeting worth coming home to," Caryn said.

"It's the least I could do, especially since I was so horny for you," I grinned.

"I must have been too—horny for you, that is."

* * * *

It took about a couple of weeks before I knew that Caryn was over her family's rejection of her lesbianism. Did they wonder who she was with? No! Naturally, they weren't interested in meeting me, but after she told me of how cold they suddenly became when she told them that she was a lesbian, I was kind of glad they didn't want to meet me.

We settled into a good routine of hating to leave each other, and loving to be together, especially me when we'd made love, or were just content with each other's company so I could hold her and talk quietly. It did always end up with us making love anyway. How could it not since Caryn always wanted me to caress her breasts at the very least. How could I say no to that? I didn't.

* * * *

Liv continued to have her classes. In time, those others at the club knew about her classes, and often someone or other would stop by with a question. If she could answer it, which she usually could, she'd tell them, but when she didn't know, she's say she didn't know. Liv was always honest.

Jabs continued to be very close to them both, often dancing with either one, and sometimes with both of them. It was obvious that Jabs loved them both—as in love with them both—but as far as we knew, she kept it to herself.

About six months later, we were at their place, and a young woman came by, distraught as could be, and crying. Liv apparently knew her from her classes.

"I'm sorry, Liv. Please forgive me. I star—started to worry about it all, and went to our pre—preacher, and asked him if it wa—was true. It just came tumbling out, and before I knew it, I'd t—t—told him everything. Then on Sunday, he told everyone. He s—said that people like you should be s—s—s—...," she couldn't end it.

We couldn't help but gasp, our collective intake of breath was audible. We were shocked to hear it, but also that a preacher would say as that girl said he did. There was sudden collective sense of fear for Liv's safety.

"It's okay. I've always told everyone that we had to start telling it as it is, but that it was risky. I expected something like that before this, but I don't think anything will come of it. They just like to rile up the congregation when they easily can."

The poor girl kept crying, and even Ariel, Caryn and Paula couldn't make her quit. Eventually, she figured she was among a lot of people that were having a social time together, and left.

Liv kept a stoic face, did smile a lot, but I could see she was shook up. We all did our best to make it easier on her, especially Jabs. Paula? She couldn't leave Liv's side after that.

A little over three weeks later, after one of her classes, Liv was shot. She was rushed to the hospital, but wasn't conscious. Paula was allowed to know about Liv, as was Jabs. Liv had made up power of attorney for both Paula and Jabs, so they were allowed to see Liv. Both of them had the power to act in Liv's behalf in every way. Liv apparently had taken that girl very seriously, or had thought of this long ago.

We stayed with Paula and Jabs throughout the evening. When they allowed Paula and Jabs to see Liv, we stayed anyway, all five of us, for Sally, Ariel, and Mary were there also. About fifteen minutes later, Jabs came out and sat with us.

"I know you're wondering, and I guess I should tell you since all of you have been such good friends to Liv and Paula. Liv began to worry that something might happen. Those words of the preachers as that girl told them were a might too powerful for her not to take it all seriously.

"Liv asked me to take care of Paula if anything happened to her. I said I would as all of you probably would have too, Paula is such a sweetheart, and yes, I do love them both, but I've never said anything to either of them. I think they knew it though, so though Paula didn't want to think about it, much less talk about it, when Liv pushed it, Paula readily agreed. If I can, I'd like to ask you all to help out some as best you can."

"Anything," I said, "and I think I speak for all of us. If you have something in mind now, just say the word, and we'll try to work it out between us."

Suddenly Jabs' tears fell. Since I was next to her, I held her to me. After a short while, Jabs controlled herself enough to talk some more.

"Thank you. God, I hate this happened, and thanks for being here. There's no way I could have cried in front of Paula, but damn it, it hurts so bad," she said, a few more tears sneaking out.

"Anyway, the doctor told us flat out that it didn't look good, and he couldn't even say Liv would come out of it. That's about to kill Paula, and she can't leave Liv's side, and I wouldn't try to make her leave. The nurses already know about what happened, and the in-charge nurse has told us we could stay, and even use the shower and toilet there since Liv isn't expected to survive," she said in a soft monotone, the strain getting to her.

"Just tell us what you want done, and we'll see it gets done," Sally said as Caryn and Ariel cried quietly. Mary, bless her heart, though some tears were coming out of her too, she was holding both Caryn and Ariel as Sally and I talked to Jabs.

We did as we said we'd do. Sally and Ariel left after a bit, and so did Mary while Caryn and I stayed to do whatever was needed, if anything. What we did do was to find them both some dinner, but neither of them was too keen on eating, though they did so to make sure their energy wasn't depleted. Jabs ate with Paula, or I should say, tried to get Paula to eat more than just a bite or two. When it was getting late night, Sally and Ariel came to stay until morning.

At home, we saw on the late news that they had the guy who shot Liv. He wildly told any and everyone that she deserved to die for disobeying God's law, and being homosexual, and teaching others how to be lesbians too, and they all should be shot.

We were horrified. Not that we were fearful of any other seeking us out, for there was a great outcry from most of the people, but that anyone in this lifetime would still speak and do as Liv had said they did ages ago was shocking.

"It's not right," Caryn said tersely, her anger showing at the injustice of it all. "Liv is the most wonderful of people, so caring and loving. How could anyone feel that way about her? How?" she demanded.

"There's a lot of crazy people out there, honey. Just as Liv said, it's never left many of them, they've had it so ingrained in them. It's unbelievable, but Liv understood them, and did what she could to protect Paula. That must have been so hard for her to do," I said, feeling what I thought must have been in Liv's heart.

Would I have done that for Caryn? I began to feel I needed to. Perhaps Sally and Ariel could look after Caryn. I had to seriously think about it, but I couldn't say anything at the moment, things were much too tense.

"We need to get some sleep, hon, so we'll be up and allowing Sally and Ariel to go home, okay?"

She just nodded, got up, and headed to the bedroom where she undressed and went to take a shower. She didn't say a word to me, she was so depressed, but I undressed too, and we showered together in silence. In bed, we clung together. Whoever that guy was, it was as if he'd shot us all.

I couldn't help but think of Liv as I held my crying Caryn in my arms. Liv and Jabs had become as an institution when at the club, always talking science, the bible, or both, and occasionally touching on other subjects, but not too often. At times many came to listen to them. That's by way of saying that I knew that there were many who were thinking of her at this time.

Chapter 17

We were up early, dressed, and headed to the hospital.

"No change," Ariel said.

"Not with Paula either," Ariel added.