The Forever Canadian Vacation

She'd always watched the TV shows where people stayed in buildings that were supposedly haunted, and had once said her spirit was going to stay with him when she died so she could make sure he was OK. Dave had first thought she was joking, but Julie said she really believed spirits could stay to be with the people they loved. Maybe Julie had been right. Maybe she was there with him. Maybe she was the one who woke him up before he drowned after the plane crash.

Dave smiled at that thought because it reminded him of something else Julie had said.

"If I go before you, I'll keep watching, and when you're ready, I'll help you join me. I want you to do the same thing for me if you go first."

Maybe she was watching him, right now, that very second, and was just waiting until he was ready. Dave decided then that he was ready to join Julie wherever she was. That was the most comfort he'd felt since the plane crash. He didn't have to try to get on with life without Julie. He'd get on with life as a spirit with Julie's spirit by his side. They'd stay there on the lake for eternity, together, in a place they both loved. When his fire burned down that afternoon, Dave didn't try to add more wood. He just watched the last red ember go out and then laid back and closed his eyes.

A while later, Dave suddenly felt his body grow warmer. He'd once read that just before you freeze to death, you feel warmer. It was supposedly the body diverting all its efforts to survive to the brain and vital organs, but now he knew the real reason that happened. That had to be Julie making him feel better while helping him to be with her. Dave closed his eyes and let his mind drift to what they'd do once they were together. After a few minutes, his mind went blank.

When Dave woke, he was warm almost to the point of being too hot. Is this what being a spirit is like, he wondered. Are you warm all the time? Being warm all the time would be good, especially since I was so cold before, but not this warm.

"Julie", Dave mumbled as he opened his eyes.

That question was answered by the quiet scuffle of feet and then the touch to his forehead. The fingers were soft, soft and warm, just like Julie's had been.

"Be still", a woman's voice said. "You need get warm."

That voice wasn't what he remembered Julie sounding like. Did being a spirit change your voice? If this woman wasn't Julie, where was she? Julie had promised to help him join her, but if she wasn't here, how could she do that?

Dave moved his head to see where he was. He didn't know where you went when you became a spirit. He'd always ought you just stopped being until Julie had said it was being like you always were but not many people could see or hear you unless they were other spirits. If that was true, he should have been back in his little tent beside his fire, but he wasn't. He felt something warm and soft against his back instead of the cold, frozen ground, and what he saw above him wasn't the tarpaulin he'd used to make his small tent.

There were rough hewn logs that formed the joists of a log cabin and above those, rafters and purlins made of smaller logs and covered with wood shakes to form a roof. As he turned his head, Dave saw a log wall and the stone fireplace that sat on that wall. The fire was the reason he was warm. He couldn't see the woman who had touched his forehead and spoken. He'd have to sit up to do that, he figured, so he tried.

The soft touch came again and pushed him gently down.

"No get up yet", said the voice.

If the woman wasn't Julie and this place wasn't his tent, that meant he wasn't dead and a spirit. If that was the case, who was she and where was this place?

"Where am I?" he asked.

"My house."

"How did I get here?"

"I bring."

"Who are you?"

"I Kishdadee. What you name?"

"I'm Dave, Dave Mosley."

The fingers touched his forehead again.

"Dave feel better now?" the voice asked.

Dave didn't know if he felt better or not. Before, when his fire had died, he'd welcomed death as an end to his suffering and a way to reunite with Julie. Now that this Kishkadee woman had brought him to her cabin and saved him, he was more confused than anything. He wasn't really rescued. He was just back where he started except he wasn't alone and he wasn't freezing. Part of him was thankful not to be dead even if he had no idea of where he was or who this woman was. The other part was thinking it would have been better if he'd just died.

"I don't know. Why did you bring me here?"

"I not want you die."

The fingers felt his forehead again. They felt warm and soft.

"Outside warm now. Need eat. Warm inside."

The liquid in the spoon she held to his lips was hot, but Dave still slurped it down. He wasn't sure what it was, but the aroma had awakened his stomach to the fact he hadn't eaten in a long time. He felt the warmth travel down to his belly and then spread outward. After a dozen more spoons of the broth, he felt full for the first time in weeks, but still craved more. Kishkadee tipped the spoon to his lips one more time and then stopped.

"Enough now. More make you sick. Later you eat again."

Dave tried to raise up then. He hadn't yet seen the woman and now that he was warm on both the outside and the inside, he wanted to see who had rescued him. The woman gently pushed him back down.

"Not strong yet. Stay in bed. Soon you get up."

All Dave could do was comply, but not because it was what the woman had said he should do. As soon as he raised his head, he felt dizzy and his vision started to blur. He realized then just how close to dying he must have been, and the thought was sobering.

Once he'd closed his eyes back in his little tent, he'd descended into nothing -- no thoughts, no feelings, no nothing. It was as he'd always believed. You just shut off and that was it. Julie might have been right about becoming a spirit, but that hadn't happened, or at least, it hadn't happened like she'd said it would.

Julie said he'd see her beckoning to him to join her before he died. When he was ready, his spirit would leave his body and go with her. Together they'd walk into a bright light and eternity together.

Dave hadn't seen anything before he entered the blackness of unconsciousness. Maybe that happened first, he didn't know, but since he was willing to join her, he thought he should have seen Julie. He hadn't. Instead, this woman had brought him to her cabin, warmed him up and fed him.

As Dave lay there he started to wonder if his promise to himself and any supreme being who might be listening was the reason the woman had saved him. There had to be some reason why she was there, apparently near to his camp, and some reason why she had found him. Dave drifted off to sleep trying to decide if Julie had been wrong.

When Dave woke again, the cabin was dark inside except for the red glow of the coals in the fireplace. He tried to push himself into a sitting position with his arms, but quickly stopped when he felt the same warm, soft hand on his chest, pushing him back down.

"No get up. Sleep."

Dave had felt her hand on his bare chest and a quick feel there told Dave he wasn't wearing a shirt. He felt lower and discovered he wasn't wearing his pants or underwear either. Evidently the woman had undressed him before putting him in her bed. He just hadn't realized it before.

Just trying to sit up had made Dave realize just how weak he really was. He drifted back to sleep thinking he'd somehow have to muster the strength to put his clothes back on. He couldn't stay naked with the woman around. It just wasn't right.

When Dave woke again, sunlight streamed through a window he couldn't see and lit the inside of the cabin. He forgot he wasn't dressed and tried to raise up, but got off balance and rolled to the floor instead. He heard a chuckle behind him.

"You not strong like think. Fall off bed."

Dave felt the cold wood planks of the floor under him and remembered he was naked. He covered his crotch with his hands in embarrassment. The woman laughed again.

"You funny. I see before. No be afraid."

"Why did you take off my clothes? I need them back."

"Warm up faster with no clothes. They cold, but warm now. I bring."

It was difficult, but with her help, Dave managed to put on his shirt. That effort was tiring, a fact that surprised Dave. Kishkadee held out his pants then, and helped him put in first one leg and then the other. He pulled them up his legs as far as he could, but couldn't stand to get them up the rest of the way.

Kishkadee stepped behind Dave.

"Now, I help get up."

Dave felt hands under his armpits pulling him up. Once he was sitting on the floor, the woman walked in front of him and held out her hands.

"Take hands. I pull you up."

Dave didn't immediately reach out for her hands. He couldn't because he couldn't stop looking at her.

She was wore a leather dress of a type he'd only seen in books about Indians, and though the dress didn't fit very tight, it was obvious she was very much a woman. She was bent over to reach him, and her breasts made twin, rounded mounds in the soft leather. The dress didn't hug her waist, but it did form itself around her round hips.

She was smiling at him, a smile that beamed from white teeth in a sensuous mouth. Above that was a small nose, sparkling, dark eyes, and arched eyebrows all framed by a mane of shining black hair that cascaded over her shoulders. Kishkadee was a very beautiful woman.

His concentration was broken by another chuckle.

"You want stay on floor? Hard eat on floor. Better eat on table."

It took all the effort he could muster, but with her help, Dave rose to a crouch and then stood up. He was shaky, but after she pulled his pants up and buttoned the button, she helped him the short distance across the cabin to a small table with three chairs, one at the end and one on each side. She pointed to the chair at the end.

"You sit here in man place."

Dave didn't realize how much his body had deteriorated from the cold and lack of food. By the time Kishkadee had walked him the short distance from the bed to the chair, he was nearly exhausted. All he could do was put his arms on the rough wood table for support until his head stopped spinning.

Kishkadee left him to go to the fire place and returned with a bowl half full of the same broth she'd given him before. She sat the bowl in front of Dave and handed him a metal spoon.

"Eat."

The broth was good, and the broth from the night before had brought back his hunger. He was half-way through the bowl when Kishkadee sat a blue enameled cup in front of him.

"Drink. Make you strong."

The cup contained a tea that tasted a little sour, but Dave drank some and then went back to his broth. When he finished, he asked if he could have more. Kishkadee shook her head.

"Little now, more later."

She was smiling when she said that, and Dave found himself smiling too. While he didn't know anything about this woman, he found he liked her. When he realized this, he shook it off as just his reaction to being rescued. He'd have felt the same way about anybody who'd taken him someplace, warmed him up, and gave him the first food he'd had in weeks.

He did want to know more about her, though. He'd ranged pretty far into the forest for firewood when it was warmer and hadn't seen any signs that anybody else was there. She had to be relatively close or she wouldn't have been able to get him to her cabin. When he looked at her, he couldn't figure out how she'd managed to do that anyway. The woman couldn't have weighed more than a hundred or so, and he normally weighed about a hundred and eighty. He'd no doubt lost weight, but still...

"Kishkadee...did I get that right?"

She nodded.

"Kishkadee, where is this place?"

"By lake where you camp."

"How did you get me back here? You're not big enough to carry me."

Kishkadee grinned.

"Bring over ice on sled. Not heavy that way. Hard get you in house on bed, but I strong."

"How did you know where I was?"

"See smoke one day and go see."

"If you knew where I was, why didn't you show yourself?"

"Other men would come get you and find me. Mother say not trust men."

It didn't look as if anyone else lived in the cabin and Kishkadee hadn't said anything about anybody else until then. He was starting to wonder how this woman managed to live by herself.

"Kishkadee, how long have you been here?"

Kishkadee walked to the wall of the cabin beside the door and touched it with her finger.

"Mother make mark every spring after I born. I make mark now every spring."

Dave saw her moving her mouth as her finger tapped each mark. When she finished, she turned and smiled.

"I twenty and six."

"You were born here...right in this cabin."

Kishkadee nodded.

"Father look for gold with other men. Made Mother house here to be close."

"Where are your mother and father now?"

"Father go fight war, not come back. He dead. Mother with spirits now."

"Your father went to war? Which war?"

Kishkadee shrugged.

"Not know. I only baby then. Mother say he go place called Inglunt. Say Army man come tell her he dead and give her letter and Father's book. I show you."

Kishkadee went to a small trunk beside the bed. She took out and opened a wooden box, and came back with a small leather bound book. She handed it to Dave.

"Not know how read English words, but look at picture sometimes to see Father."

The little book was actually two small paper books inside a leather cover. Stamped on the leather cover were the words "CANADIAN ARMY" and below that, "SOLDIER'S SERVICE AND PAY BOOK". Dave carefully opened the cover and found a Canadian soldier's identification card for Corporal William Henry Hughes.

William was born in 1921 and the identification card was issued on January 10, 1942. The war he'd fought in had to be WWII and the "Inglunt" Kishkadee had spoken of had to be England. The Canadian Post Telegram he picked from between the pages told him William had been part of the Canadian forces on D-Day. The words were apparently written by William's commanding officer and were short and to the point.

Mrs. Hughes, it is my sad duty to inform you that your husband, Corporal William Henry Hughes was killed in action in France on June 6, 1944. Corporal Hughes was a brave soldier who died fighting for his country. Our company will miss him greatly. An officer will contact you soon with Corporal Hughes' personal effects.

Captain H.G. Oglethorp

Dave turned to Kishkadee.

"This says your father was killed in 1944. It's 1969, and if you're twenty-six now, that means you and your mother lived here by yourselves at least from the time you were a year old. Why didn't she move back with family after your father died?"

Kishkadee frowned.

"Mother Anishinabe. Father white man. In Anishinabe way, father family take wife and baby if father die, not mother family. Mother not know where Father family live, so just stay here."

"So, when did your mother die?"

Kishkadee counted her marks again, then turned and smiled.

"Ten springs."

"You've lived here by yourself since you were sixteen? How did you survive?"

Kishkadee smiled.

"Mother father no have son so he teach Mother man things. Mother teach Kishkadee how do things like Anishinabe woman and Anishinabe man. She teach how find plants and how hunt and fish. She teach how make dress from deer and how dry meat. She teach how trap fox and beaver for warm fur. I learn good."

Dave found himself smiling back.

"She evidently taught you to speak English too."

Kishkadee grinned.

"Mother teach Anishinabe words, but Father want me talk English so she teach English words for Anishinabe words. When I watch you, I hear you say English words, so talk English words."

"You watched me? For how long?"

"Many times since I see smoke."

"And you didn't show yourself because your mother told you not to trust men? Why did she say that? She must have trusted your father."

"She say when Father leave, he say he be back soon, but he not come back. When Army man come, he say they bring Father home, but he in place called Franz. No one sing and pray for him so he find good life after he die. Mother say not trust men ever again."

Dave's next question was one that had been eating away at him since he woke up and realized he wasn't dead.

"If you don't trust men, why didn't you let me die."

Kishkadee's face turned from a smile to a serious frown.

"You not believe if I say. Mother say no white people believe."

"Try me. I might."

"I have dream. Woman say you dying and she want me help."

Dave felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up.

"Who was the woman?"

Kishkadee shrugged.

"Not know. Just say I help you not die now."

The look on her face was the same look Julie had when she talked about becoming a spirit, a look that told Dave Kishkadee truly believed she'd been asked to help him by the woman in her dream. He hesitated before asking his next question.

"This woman...did you see her?"

Kishkadee nodded.

"What did she look like?"

"She have yellow hair and eyes like sky, and she young like me. She say she not want you die for long time."

Dave sagged back in his chair and felt his throat grow tight. Julie was blonde and had blue eyes.

"Did the woman say why I shouldn't die?"

Kishkadee shook her head.

"No. She just say I help you not die now."

Dave couldn't help staring at Kishkadee and she noticed.

"Why you look at me? I say bad thing?"

"No, you didn't say anything wrong. I just don't know if I can believe what you're saying."

"Why not believe? Kishkadee not lie."

"I know you aren't lying. I can see that in your face. It's just that the woman in your dream was a lot like Julie.

Kishkadee frowned.

"Who is Julie?"

Dave took a deep breath.

"Julie was my wife. She died about a year ago and she had blonde hair and blue eyes. She always said if she died before I did, her spirit would watch over me. What you just told me was that Julie came to you in a dream and said it wasn't my time and you should help me. I didn't think that was possible."

Kishkadee grinned.

"Then woman in dream was Wife Julie. Wife Julie want you live."

"I just never thought spirits were real."

"Spirits real. Spirits talk to Kishkadee sometimes. Mother, Father, now Wife Julie. Mother teach how listen to spirits."

Dave wondered if Kishkadee was just a little off from living alone for so long. He'd experienced being alone for only a few months and was starting to have some weird dreams at night. He decided he should just agree with her for now and decide what to do with her once he got back to civilization.

"I guess I have to believe you, and I thank you for doing what you did. Now, how do I get to a town so I can get home?"

Kishkadee shook her head.

"Not go now. You not strong yet. Walk long time in summer to find people but it winter now and too cold to walk. In Spring maybe you start fire again and men see smoke."

Dave shook his head.

"I can't stay here until Spring. My family will be worried sick and I have a job to get back to. I already tried keeping a fire burning for weeks but no planes flew over. I doubt that will change next spring."

Kishkadee smiled.

"Sometimes things happen you not think happen. We see...in Spring. Now, you go rest in bed."

For the next two days, Kishkadee wouldn't let Dave do anything except eat and stay in bed. At first, she only let him eat more of the broth like before. Dave could feel his body responding to the food, even though it was only liquid. After two days, he started to feel hunger again, real hunger, so Kishkadee added a small piece of some kind of meat and one small root she said was a cattail. Dave ate it all and asked for more, but was always met with the same smile and rejection to his request.