The Long Goodbye

Food stains looked dismayed. He said, "I don't know. They might have taken the body straight to the morgue. We were so sure." Then he added, "We can still get the evidence without breaking chain of custody. But the gap might be an issue in court."

I wanted to tell them that they were fat, lazy, incompetent slobs. But that wasn't going to get me out of custody faster. I had very serious business to conduct. Somebody was going to pick up the tab for this.

~

Kelly met me at the exit door to the Howard Street lock-up. It was a sleepless night; interrupted by the occasional crying jag. People don't mess with guys built like me; especially when they are sitting in the corner of a holding cell weeping pitifully. The other denizens must have thought I was whacko; they were ALL giving me a wide berth.

I had thought through every angle in the dark hours. The only conclusion was that Tedesco visited Pia after I left. It made sense. He was probably the first person she called. It hurt a lot to think that she would immediately turn to that fucker. But, I had left her because she was banging him. So, he must have seemed like her safe harbor.

I had no idea why he killed her. But, that was irrelevant; and it wouldn't change what would happen next. I was guessing that the evidence would prove that Tedesco had left a calling card; once those two doofuses got around to collecting the DNA. The problem was that, I wouldn't be able to get to the douchebag once they locked him up. So, the clock was ticking.

Kelly was sitting on the fender of her Miata looking stunning. She is exceptionally long waisted. So, her figure would probably be called hourglass. But, it looks more like an hour-and-a-half glass because of her tiny waist. She rushed over to me and gave me a lingering hug. It conveyed her love and concern. It also made me spring something inappropriate. Her tits were so soft and her body was so hard.

We drove down the street to the Starbucks. She got us a couple of Vente-Lattes and we sat at a table. It was obvious to the other customers that I had spent the night up the street. It made them nervous. I thought, "Fuckem!!"

Kelly said, "I talked to the cops. They know that you weren't anywhere near Pia when it happened."

She said contemptuously, "Now they're working on the theory that you hired it. But they can't explain the rape."

I laughed mockingly and said, "I keep hit-men on speed dial. So, I got a guy over to kill and rape Pia just as soon as I learned about the affair." I added with anger, "Those two are a waste of my tax dollars."

I said grimly, "It was Tedesco, no doubt about it. I know everybody Pia knows. Short of a random home invasion, that motherfucker is the only wildcard. He was no doubt the one who left the little deposit in her. If he did, then his DNA will finger him. But that still won't bring Pia back."

Kelly gazed at me solemnly and said, "Are you having regrets?"

I said, "Affairs and divorces are one thing. Killing a woman who is a gentle and inoffensive human being is something entirely different. I was going to divorce Pia. That was between her and me and it is nothing I regret. It was something that I had to do to keep any shred of self-respect"

Kelly looked quizzical. I said by way of explanation, "She was fucking him for eight months." Kelly looked surprised.

She said, "WOW, that's a really long time to conduct a clandestine affair."

I said, "It's okay, you can just call me stupid."

I smiled sadly at Kelly and said, "There were a million things that I liked about Pia. She was a great wife and mom and she took excellent care of her family. She was a kind and gentle soul. But I would never be able to trust or respect her again. So, I knew I had to divorce her."

I let the anger show as I said, "This whole heartbreaking disaster was caused by Tedesco." Kelly looked at me like she expected me to continue.

I said, "I'm sure that you have self-important douchebags hit on you all the time; good family, handsome, rich, and entitled. He just expects every woman to want fall into bed with him."

Kelly got a look of loathing on her face and said, "I have been hit on more times than Evander Holyfield's speed bag. I hate those kinds of guys."

She said, "So what are you planning to do?"

I said. "There is nothing like lying awake in a jail cell to focus your thinking. This is what I came up with so far. First, the guy should suffer; a lot!! Do you agree with that?"

Kelly looked like I had turned her on. She got a wolfish grin and said, "What do you mean when you say - a lot?"

Note to self: Never get on Kelly McMahan's bad side.

I said grimly, "Killing him ends it too soon and he will eventually heal from a beating, or even torture." Kelly was nodding her head enthusiastically. She was obviously all-in with helping me. It was uplifting. That is, if you ignored the fact that my suggestions seemed like her version of foreplay; which was actually a little disturbing.

I said, "So, I wanted to strike at his core; give Tedesco the gift that keeps on giving. Better yet, I want the consequences of his transgressions to be forever burned into his soul." Kelly looked like she was about to cum. I was thinking to myself, "I have never met such a savage spirit, male, or female."

I said, "The guy lives for conquest. He needs to subjugate women to sustain his view of himself, as the alpha dog; the strongest and most virile male in the pack. So, I was wondering what being weak and helpless and unable to fuck anybody for the rest of his life, would do to his self-image."

Kelly was enthralled. She said, as if she was relishing the thought, "So you want to cut off his cock?" I laughed and said, "That isn't harsh enough. I want to rob him of hope. I want to make him a helpless cripple for the rest of his life. I like the thought of him spending the remainder of his preferably, very long and pathetic existence, in a wheel chair peeing and shitting through a bag; never able to enjoy sex again."

I was appalled by my own savagery. But, I had more empathy for a rattlesnake. At least the snake didn't know any better. Tedesco had consciously and willfully invaded my life, plundered my wife and then thrown her away like a broken toy.

Kelly said in an awed tone of voice, "How can I help?"

~

The woman underneath Tedesco was writhing in the throes of her third orgasm. Her hard body was covered in sweat. Her screams could be heard all over the darkened office. Fortunately for the two of them, the only other people in the building were the security staff. Her name was Lilly and she was just 21. She was a good legal assistant but she was a much better fuck.

She was a beautiful little thing, long blond hair, round, innocent, girl-next-door face, with a faultless, lithe body. Tedesco really enjoyed her eagerness. She was so young and flexible that Tedesco could mold her into any position he liked and her tight little body had no fat on it.

She was a very enthusiastic, if unskilled partner. But, she was touchingly eager to learn. Tedesco wanted to teach her everything, and her sex drive rivaled Pia's. She didn't have Pia's big heavy breasts. But she made up for it with a marvelous apple shaped ass, which Tedesco had just finished ravaging.

They lay there in post coital bliss; her face down on his big couch, Tedesco slowly shrinking out of her bottom. He rose slowly and walked into the adjoining bathroom. She was catching her breath, still emitting little sighs and moans. He looked at her neat little naked form with its round buns sticking up and decided that he was going to keep this one around for a while.

As he cleaned himself off he was thinking that Pia was easier to replace than he had imagined. This girl was considerably younger, had a prettier face, had more endurance and her husband was in the military. So, he was gone on training exercises more than he was at home. The idea of exploiting the wife of a soldier made Tedesco feel especially macho and potent.

Lilly had been an easy conquest. She was just a spoiled brat and Tedesco had no problem working his way into her pants. It was the classic "resentment-of-his-job" gambit. He'd played it numerous times. It was a sure thing if you were patient. The husband could never rival Tedesco's big money, the flashy car, and the jaunty insouciance. Tedesco made her feel special and Lilly fell fast and hard.

He knew that the police had dropped the net over Pia's ape of a husband. It was

Tedesco himself who had pointed the cops in the right direction. Tedesco was one smooth shyster and the two detectives were incredibly stupid. So, he was feeling especially full of himself.

He had a date with his buddies for the Bulls. So, he had to get rid of this little fluff-ball. He picked up her clothes and threw them at her. He said, "Get dressed Baby. I have an important meeting to get to. Oh, and by-the-way, thanks for the fuck. It was excellent"

The woman stirred and said, "But I thought you were taking me to the Orbit room?"

Tedesco didn't want to miss the game so he said with irritation in his voice, "Some other time Baby. This is a business meeting. I can't miss it."

Lilly was submissive, a lot like Pia. That was another thing Tedesco appreciated about her. So, she apologized, dressed quickly and the two of them strolled nonchalantly past security. Tedesco gave the guards a thumbs-up behind his back.

They both nudged each other. Oh, to be John Tedesco.

Tedesco knew that he had killed Pia. He hadn't meant to do it. He still had uses for her. It had just happened. She had deliberately hurt him and Tedesco couldn't allow that sort of thing to go unpunished; especially with a woman he was fucking. He would miss her spectacular body. But, she had it coming. The thought of Pia's brute husband doing life for something that Tedesco had actually done was just a delightful side-benefit.

John Tedesco was a classic narcissist. He had been brought up in money and he was the light of his parents' lives. Growing up, they excused his excesses and their money smoothed over his transgressions. Throughout his teen years, he was about as empowered and untouchable as a boy could be. In college, his height, good looks and social savoir-faire guaranteed one easy conquest after another. He had nerds and dweebs to do the work for him and the occasional donation from his parents to keep the school administration pacified.

The same was true with his career. His parents bought him into Barton and Barton. He really didn't need the money. But, he loved the special power that lawyers have. John Tedesco was a lion in the courtroom, because he was so supremely self-confident. Juries believed him. That made him feel all-powerful. Yet, power corrupts; and John Tedesco was about as corrupt as you could get.

He had been annoyed when the two blockheads who were investigating Pia's murder had insisted that he come in for a talk. He told them that they could come to HIM if they wanted to talk; unless he was under arrest. Like everybody else in John Tedesco's life, they grumbled but they came.

They had finally discovered that Pia had had sex before her murder, and they wanted a DNA sample; just to eliminate him. He told them to get a warrant. He was counting on them never getting around to doing that. Tedesco could tell that they were just putting in those last few years to retirement.

Besides, he had a back-up story. He would tell them that he HAD, had sex with Pia and that was what had driven her husband to kill her. But he wouldn't get into that mess if could avoid it. The request for DNA had happened three weeks earlier and he hadn't heard from them since. He smirked knowingly. He was meeting a gang of his old fraternity brothers and he didn't want to miss a minute of the fun, frivolity and pussy hunting.

~

I still needed proof. I wanted Tedesco to suffer for ruining my marriage. But I wouldn't be able to sleep at night if I couldn't extract the full measure of vengeance from whoever killed Pia. I didn't know for sure whether Tedesco and the killer were one-and-the-same. But I was going to start from that assumption.

I also had a business to run and a funeral to organize. The latter was soaking-up a lot of my time and all my psychic energy. Pia's kids were devastated; naturally. Even though Betsy was 19 and Brad was 21, they were still very close to their mother. I wasn't much better off. I hear you asking; "How could I mourn a woman who I was going to divorce?" The fact is that I had gone from comfortably married to grieving widower in a matter of a week.

Pia had been my lover and closest companion for fourteen years; whereas, my knowledge of her crimes filled the space of a mere half day. So naturally, the colossal pain of her sudden and violent death blew away any thoughts of her betrayal. I was burying her as my loving wife. The only people who knew the whole story were me, Kelly, and Roger Wilkinson and they could be relied on to be discreet.

Nevertheless, the lingering outcome of her infidelity DID serve to uncouple me from any sense of accountability for her death. I normally would have been crippled by guilt; for not being there for her. Her actions with Tedesco, had relieved me of that obligation. Consequently, I wasn't beating myself up for a failure to defend her. That absolution was a blessing because it let me mourn her without complications; and then move on.

Most the people at the funeral thought that I had killed her. That was hard to take. But I am a tough guy by choice. So, I ignored all the accusing stares and bid my wife a loving farewell. Kelly had wanted to come to support me. I told her to stay away. Being seen with a stunning red-head at the funeral of my brutally murdered wife wouldn't have helped my case. Nobody went out of their way to express their condolences afterward; which I expected.

As soon as they all left, I stood over Pia's grave; solitary and alone. It was a nasty February late-afternoon; freezing rain mixed with snow, heavy storm clouds blocking out the sun. I was bare-headed, in my only suit, getting soaked. But I had to linger to say one last thing. I had nobody else to tell it to. Nobody else would understand.

I told Pia that I only recalled the good times and that I would always love her. Then I stopped and said, my voice choked by emotion, "I am going to put John Tedesco's head on a stake for you, baby." I turned and walked slowly away from her grave.

The police were particularly sensitive to my grief; NOT!! Donuts and Food Stains were waiting for me as I made my lonely way back to my car. They had one of those DNA swab vials. They told me to open wide, and say ahhh. I told them to swab away. I knew that would eliminate me from consideration. But I was also sure that they thought that I was implicated one-way-or-another, anyhow.

I said cheerfully, "So you recovered some DNA?"

Food Stains said, "Yeah from her vagina and there was also skin under her fingernails."

I added merrily, "Do you want me to strip so you can check me for scratches." Neither of them appreciated my humor. I didn't either.

I said, "This is going to eliminate me from consideration. Who are you looking at next?"

Donuts took my declaration of innocence skeptically. He said, "We aren't sure."

I said, "What about Tedesco?"

Food Stains said, "He isn't cooperating and we don't have probable cause to get a warrant."

I said, sarcastically, "What does it take, beyond the fact that he was fucking the victim."

Donuts said angrily, "None of your business asshole!! This still doesn't clear you. Even if the DNA match turns up negative." They turned and stomped away.

Well, that was useful information. I knew that they had the DNA report and Tedesco was stone-walling them. I assumed he could hold them off for a long time. He was a lawyer after all. But then again, the test of innocence was a whole lot stricter in my court. Whoever left the deposit was the murderer.

The fact that she had fought back was confusing. I assumed that the sperm donor was Tedesco. She had fucked his brains out that afternoon So why had she struggled this time???!! I thought to myself, "Maybe she told him no; and that's why he hit her." That fact wasn't relevant to what I had in mind. But it added a count to the indictment against Tedesco.

I met Kelly at Tommy Nevins. It was a little loud. But the Guinness was authentic and Kelly had the locals staring like the Maid of Erin herself, had just dropped in for a beer. She was in a simple jeans and Northwestern Wildcats jersey that only emphasized how stunningly well-put-together she was. Her copper hair was in a pony tail that showcased her perfect Celtic features. The fact that she had her P290 holstered above her round butt kind-of muddled the good Catholic girl image. But in my eyes, it made her hotter then hell.

Her emerald eyes were glistening with concern. The minute she sat down she said, "I wish you had let me come with you."

I said, "Being there by myself helped me separate myself from my past. The person I used to be is gone. I buried him with my wife. I am somebody else now. As soon as I close the account with Tedesco I am going to move on as that new person; without regret."

Kelly said, "You know my graduate work is in psych, right? You can talk to me."

I said, "I don't have to talk to anybody. I know what's happening. It's like the life-extinguishing impact of this past month has split off a new Joey. I'm born again."

I smiled ominously and added, "Just not in the Christian sense. I'm thinking more along the lines of a dark pagan religion; perhaps Mayan. The only way I am going to be whole again is if I get to cut out somebody's heart."

Kelly looked intrigued. She said, "Where should we start?"

I said, "This is something that I have to fix by myself kiddo. I don't want you to witness what I am going to do. It is going to be way too brutal. When this is over, I want you to like and respect me, not fear me."

Kelly's eyes blazed with anger. The ferocity in her stare was not that of a normal 28-year-old. I thought to myself, "The only time I see that kind of viciousness is when I look in the mirror."

She said, "I ought to shoot you for being such a fucking asshole. You don't have a clue who I am. You'd be appalled if you knew how ruthless I can be for the right reasons. I know it's going to get intense. But I am your friend and your partner; ALWAYS."

Her eyes drilled into me as she said, "We are going to do this and I am not going to suffer a single drop of remorse. In fact, I wouldn't like, or respect you, if you DIDN'T let me help you. I am a lot tougher and more pragmatic than you think I am; Bucco!!"

I sat back and looked at her. I wanted Kelly to steer clear of what I was going to do to Tedesco, because I didn't want to offend her tender feminine sensibilities. I know I'm capable of doing very bad things. It's the chief reason why I keep a tight rein on my temper. Somebody who can bench 400-pounds has to exercise constant self-control. What I had underestimated was Kelly's inexplicable dedication to me. I had also overlooked the fact that when the Native Americans needed a captive properly tortured, they turned them over to the women.

I had to confirm that Tedesco was Pia's killer. I was going to do hurtful things to him anyway; simply for ruining my marriage. But he was going to get the nine-whole-yards of pain and anguish if he was the one who killed my wife. If not, then I had another larger account to settle with somebody else, somewhere. But, make no mistake. The debt would be paid.

The cops had the DNA sample. I needed that first. I knew that the DNA report would be part of Pia's case file. So, I had to get the number. I could have just asked for it, as her husband. But, I wanted to stay off law enforcement's radar for future reference.