The Tutor

As I took my place at the crack in the door Sarah was ordering her books and papers. For a moment I thought maybe I'd gone through all this just to watch her do her homework for twenty minutes, but then she stood up and walked over to my hallway door and I heard her turn the lock. My heart skipped. She reappeared and with her back to me she pulled her jeans and panties down. but unlike the last time she bent over and pulled them all the way off. Sarah had beautiful long legs and a lovely round ass. She touched her cheeks, rubbing at the lines her panties made on her pale skin. I could see from the direction of her gaze that she was glancing nervously at the windows. There were houses facing my room, but they were far enough away and the street was tree lined enough that I'd never worried about being seen.

I watched in astonishment as she lifted her shirt off over her head and put it on the bed. She was stripping herself bare. She reached behind her back and undid her bra. Turning as she did. I watched jealously as she hunched her shoulders and let the cups fall away from her breasts. She straightened up and I was entranced. Sarah's body was so much more beautiful than I'd even imagined. She had very few freckles. She had a pale unblemished "peaches and cream" complexion. Her nipples and pussy were lovely pale pinks. Her hair was just barely red. It really did look like spun gold, especially as she stood naked in the afternoon sun coming in my windows. I knew she was long limbed and thin, but she wasn't skinny. She had a lovely shape to her, her ass was full and round, and her hips made wonderful sharp points on either sides of her flat belly. Her breasts were unbelievable, I'd assumed, that like a lot of girls with large breasts her bras were doing a lot of structural work, but not Sarah. If anything her bras disguised her breasts real beauty, hid them behind generic foam shapes. Her breasts were beautifully long and stood away from her ribs as if they weighed nothing at all.

She touched them, squeezing them gently as she climbed back onto my bed. I was confused at first, wondering what she meant to do. Standing for a moment on her knees, besides her books and papers, she seemed to be looking at my pillows. She caressed her breasts for a moment longer, pulling at her nipples, which were puffing up and darkening, becoming more defined and rosy, but then she tipped forward, lowering herself until her ass was in the air and face was pressed into my pillow.

I think that's when I started to pull down my pants. I'm really not sure. The truth is, the first thing I knew I had my pants down and was stroking myself with wet fingers. Consciously or not, I was following the rhythm of Sarah's movement - which were slow and gentle. Nothing like the frantic rubbing I'd witness the week before.

Still, I could already feel my climax building. My whole body seemed to burn for it as I watched Sarah rubbing and fingering herself. She was mashing and rubbing her face against my pillow making her ponytail wag slowly back and forth.

My knees felt weak. I was holding onto the door jam for support when I heard her cumming. Her call was muffled by the pillow but it was high and girlish and totally unmistakable.

"Rebekah! Oh God please Rebekah!"

The sound her of calling my name made me cum. My left hand was over my head gripping the door jam. My jaw clenched as I felt my bent legs and hunched back stiffen and freeze. I held myself in that crude posture as waves of pleasure wracked me. The back of my tongue cramped in my effort to stay silent. Cum was dripping down my legs, I'd soaked myself. I couldn't remember ever being this wet. I took long slow breaths through my nose as I reached for my pants. I was still watching Sarah, who had arched her back but was now slumped. She pulled her hand out from under her, fingers wet. For a brief moment I thought she was going to lick them, but instead she seemed to study them before wiping them on my pillow.

I was shaking as I backed slowly away from the doorway as Sarah raised herself up, cum wet fingers pressing into my pillow. I snuck back downstairs and stood in the foyer, my hands shaking uncontrollably. I heard the click of my bedroom lock from upstairs and I tiptoed back through the house to the kitchen where I retrieved the two Cokes in a deli bag I'd put in the fridge. I stood in front of the fridge taking deep breaths before going back to the front door, slipping on my shoes, noisily opening and closing the front door, and pounding like a linebacker back up the steps.

'Sarah must think I'm a foot stomping fool,' I thought idly.

It wasn't until I tried the door that it occurred to me that I hadn't washed my hand, that my fingers were still wet - I wiped as much as I could on the doorknob, but it was too late to go back. I found Sarah dressed and sitting where I'd left her, she looked a little flush and flustered, but so was I.

"I- I brought you a Coke!" I announced brightly and too loud, careful to hand her the can with my dry left hand.

"Oh, wow, thanks... but you didn't-"

"It's nothing," I assured her. She had taken it from me with her right hand, which was dry. I couldn't stop myself from glancing at my pillow - which looked clean, and just where I'd left it.

After an awkward back and forth about my trip to the registrar Sarah and I got to work. We went over her writing, discussed how her prose could be improved and clarified, and then she showed me a short story she'd written about a childhood neighbor named Suzy - who had babysat for her and her brother and sister.

"This is really good Sarah, did you write this for a class?"

"No," she admitted, blushing deeply. "It was just something I did for myself."

"I think that's great. Can I hold onto this? I'd like to finish reading it... I can give you some notes on it."

"Really? You don't mind?"

"Not at all. In fact I think you should write another for next week. I think it might help you with your essay work."

Sarah seemed to consider this. She was staring at me, and then seemed to catch herself, her color rising anew.

"Oh, yeah - I can do that, that would be great!"

"I think that Coke has abandoned you," I told her. "You must be starved. Come downstairs, it's my night to cook dinner for everyone and I'm making ravioli - nothing special, but it will get your blood sugar back up."

"That's really not necessary... besides I'm a vegetarian."

"Do you eat cheese?" I asked.

"Yeah, but-"

"Then we're golden. I'm making a red sauce - no meat - and the ravioli is spinach and cheese. It's fresh, you'll love it."

We chatted while I cooked. She told me about her family and her boyfriend back home. About being homesick and her interest in graphic design, but that she didn't want to "just design logos."

"Why didn't you apply to RISD?" I asked her.

"My parents would never have let me go there," she said glumly.

All in all her life back home sounded a bit grim to me. I tried to imagine what my life would have been like if my father had had a stroke and my mother had had to support us. I had the sense that Sarah very much had to make her own way, and had.

We were done eating before any of my housemates got home. We said our good nights at the front door and just as she was about to leave she turned and gave me a big hug.

"Thank you so much Rebekah," she whispered in my ear. It broke my heart.

I felt like such a sleaze ball for spying on her as I watched her walk down the block, her ponytail swinging with the bounce in her walk.

I had left everything ready to go on the stove for the guys when they got home, so I went ahead and went to my room. I closed the hall door of my bathroom and locked it, and then went to look at my bed.

Sarah's story was sitting out on my desk. I sat down and in the twilight gloom I finished it. The story was little more than a character study, but Sarah's description of Suzy was so loving it bordered on erotic. She described seeing the older girl naked as they'd changed into bathing suits, and how much she'd admired the older girl's body; the shape of her breast, the color of her nipples. She went to great lengths about how their bedrooms faced each other over a narrow gap between their houses, how she would listen and watch from her window. I blushed reading this. Picturing Sarah as a little girl hiding at her window exactly the same way I hid at my bathroom door. And while she never came out and said it, it seemed clear she used to spy on Suzy having sex.

'Does she know?' I wondered, staring at my bed, at my pillow.

I got up and crossed to my bed. Turning over my pillow I found the smears of cum Sarah's fingers had left. I looked at them with such a strange twisted mix of emotions.

"What do you want Rebekah?!" I asked myself in exasperation. I thought of Sarah calling my name as I walked to my bedroom door and locked it. I started working at my fly and undressed right where Sarah had undressed, even glancing nervously out my windows. It was getting dark outside, so I turned off my lights.

'Just in case,' I thought.

My panties had been soaked and I was glad to take them off. My bush was smashed and matted, I ran my fingers through the black thick hair, thinking of how pretty Sarah's little golden bush looked. I climbed onto my bed and stood on my knees looking down at the pillow that Sarah had marked. I touched my body the way she had, feeling my skin, cupping my breasts, pulling at my nipples. I lowered myself down, so my ass was in the air and my face was just over the marks her fingers made. I inhaled deeply. I could smell her. I pressed my face against the soiled fabric, putting out my tongue in the darkness as I wet my fingers in my cunt.

My knees slid wider, the way Sarah's had. I felt entirely exposed. I imagine what it would be like to do this while she watched. I imagined her hand on the small of my back and I cum.

"Oh Sarah, please Sarah!" I cried, wishing she could hear me.

Ben asked me out on a date that weekend, I said yes, but my heart wasn't in it. I felt bad, because I'd really been into him, but the night we went out I couldn't muster any enthusiasm and knew he could tell. We split the check and I walked home alone, relieved but also lonely. I did something that night I never do, I cruised porn on the internet.

I started out searching for videos of girls masturbating and after going through a bunch that were pretty gross, or just sad, I found one that was really nice with a girl who reminded me of Sarah. She was blonde but she had Sarah's pale complexion and body, although her breasts weren't as nice as Sarah's. But they were just as big and they looked real, which I liked. She didn't have any suspicious bruises or scary tattoos like some of the other girls I'd seen. And best of all she was in a clean well lit room on immaculate white sheets.

But it was something girlish about her mouth that really reminded me of Sarah, the little triangle of teeth her thick upper lip showed. She didn't look terribly bright, but like Sarah's Clark Kent, I liked that. And she didn't scream or do anything porny, which surprised me, and when she came it looked real. I like that too. She looked genuinely happy. I touched myself while I watched her cum. I was very wet.

When it was over I was prompted to click through to another video with the same girl. Again the setting was clean and simple. An even bigger all white room. This one with arches and the only furniture was a big ottoman. The girl who looked like Sarah was on the floor, and sitting behind her playing with her hair was a dark haired girl sitting on the ottoman with her knees spread wide. The dark haired girl had wonderfully long legs. Both girls were wearing pretty white underpants and bras - not lingerie. Neither of them looked like a porn star or a hooker. Neither girl had on much makeup. They both had long pretty hair worn loose and down. No strange bruises or sores, no fake boobs. The dark haired girl had little conical boobs like mine and was wearing diamond earrings. She didn't look dumb. She looked like someone I might meet at one of my mother's garden parties, "Rebekah, you remember Sandra's daughter?" I could hear my mother saying. I felt a thrill as the two of them began to kiss and softly stroke and fondle each other.

The video turned out to be surprisingly hard core. They never spoke, their movements were slow and languid - nothing they did seemed forced or false - so I expected some light touching, maybe some simulated sex. But as they undressed each other the touching got more and more intimate. And the girl who looked like Sarah began to lick the other girl's shaved pussy. And they weren't pretending, she was really licking her pussy. Her pussy was soaking wet.

Watching this, I found myself doing something else I never do - had never done - I put my fingers in my mouth and tasted myself. I sucked my fingers clean before touching myself again, wetting them, and then sucked them clean again. I did this over and over while watching the girls fingering and licking each other's pussies in a series of different positions. At one point the little blonde licked the other girl's asshole from behind. The camera cut back and forth between a close up of her tongue caressing the clean pink asshole, and shots of the other girl's face as she whimpered and moaned. One of the most exciting was the blonde girl reclining on the ottoman with the other girl straddling her waist, but she was facing away from the little blonde. Hand under her belly, she was masturbating while the dumb looking blonde fucked her from behind with two fingers. I wanted that.

But I actually came watching the girl who looked like Sarah kneeling between the other girls legs eating her pussy. The dark haired girl was struggling to stay on her feet, she had her hand on a low wide arch above her head, supporting herself. Her knees bent and back hunched, she was standing exactly the way I had stood as I came watching Sarah masturbate in my bed.

I spent the days leading up to Sarah's next tutoring session feeling guilty and conflicted. I kept masturbating to the video, but told myself that I had to tell Sarah the truth, that what I was doing was wrong. But when the day came I unlocked and opened the hallway door to my bathroom, closed the shade and hung the robe on the bathroom door to the bedroom and carefully closed it almost all the way. I looked at my bed, it was made, covers smoothed. I reached for my pillow and turned it over. The streaks of Sarah's cum weren't obvious, but they were still there. I was ready.

When Sarah arrived she was in good spirits. She was wearing little running shorts and a t-shirt. Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail that swung as she climbed the stairs.

"look at you looking so sporty and fit," I called. What have you been doing, did you run?"

"Ha!" she laughed. "Hardly, but I did study on the lawn?"

"Well you look great, and thats all that matters. come on in."

I watched her as she hesitated, giving my cum smeared pillow a guilty look, but started unpacking her things onto the bed.

Once she was settled on the bed with her things laid out for me, that's when I told her.

"I'm going to step out," I said simply - no lies, no excuses. She blinked in surprise. "I'll be gone about twenty minutes, can you take care of yourself til I'm back?"

"Um, yeah... I guess?" she said, looking confused.

"Great," I said and left.

I didn't bang down the stairs especially loud, but I opened and closed the front door. I waited a little longer than I had before, wanting to be sure Sarah was settled in, that she wasn't going to pack up her things and leave. When she didn't emerge from my room I snuck back upstairs and into the bathroom. When I peeked into my room I found Sarah still dressed, right where I left her. She was looking at the hallway door. For a moment I felt a frisson of dread; that perhaps she had heard me. But after a long moment, that felt like an eternity, she stood and reached for the waistband of her shorts.

She undressed very slowly - not like a striptease or hesitantly, but like she was thinking about what she was doing. And for a long time she stood in her underwear, staring at the hallway door, like she was trying to decide what to do... or listening. She was blushing deeply as she took off her bra - had she blushed before? I couldn't remember. My breath seemed very loud in my ears. I tried to slow my breathing, taking longer and deeper breaths.

Sarah was still watching the hall door. I watched as her nipples began to swell and harden. She was touching herself through her panties and I could see they were very wet. Finally she slipped her panties down and kicked them off. They disappeared under my bed but Sarah just pushed her things out of the way and crawled onto my bed. She paused for a moment on her hands and knees, and brow furrowed, stared down at my pillow. Finally she turned onto her back. I had to stop myself from gasping as she raised her far knee and turned on her side so she was facing the bathroom door. For a terrifying moment it seemed like she was looking right at me, but then she closed her eyes and began to touch herself.

It's as if she knew I was there and was performing for me. My pants were already pulled down, my fingers pushing through the tangle of my bush. I thought of the girls in the video, how the dark haired girl had straddled the blonde's waist, facing away from her. She had rubbed her clit, bring herself to orgasm while the other girl fucked her with two fingers from behind. I wondered what it would be like to cum that way with Sarah, to kiss and bite her soft thighs as I came.

Sarah was groping herself. Her fingers pressed at her pale soft flesh, gently squeezing her breast and slowly fingering her pussy. This was entirely unlike her first frantic performance, she seemed to know there was no hurry, and was luxuriating. I moved my fingers as slow as hers; tried to mirror the movements of her hand. She sighed and hugged and spread her legs wider. Pushing her belly out and her breasts up. Her lips were parted and wet. She started to drool and thoughtlessly wiped as her lips with her cum slick fingers.

I shivered. I was wiping my lips with my own fingers, pushing them into my mouth to suck them clean. When Sarah came it was a slow gentle buildup. She rolled on her back and was pumping her hips, finally lifting her ass off the bed, and releasing a long low breath - almost a moan, but silent. Then something remarkable happened. She squirted, a stream of clear liquid spattered her thighs and my covers.

She didn't seem to notice and slumped back, lifting her hands up over her head to grip my pillow and wipe her fingers. She was so beautiful I felt like I might explode.

My own orgasm was just then, as I watched her carelessly wipe her hand on my pillowcase. It was a hot liquid thing that seemed to blow out of my belly and heat my whole body like a wave. I caught myself as I started to call out.

"g..."

Sarah was barely out of arm's reach, but was a thousand miles away and didn't hear the little utterance. I had started to slump and caught myself on the towel rack. I held myself there, afraid I might fall, reaching for my pants, trying to pull them up. When I regained myself I pulled myself up and got my pants back on as silently as I could before sneaking back downstairs. I felt pathetic and disgusted with myself.

I climbed the stairs weighed down by my own self loathing. When I opened my door I found Sarah dressed but looking flush and guilty. She was sitting with one leg off the bed and the other folded over the spot on the duvet she had sprayed.

"Hey, sorry..." I started.

""Hey! No it's ok, I've, uh, I've got everything ready I think."