There and Back Again Ch. 165

Chapter One Hundred Sixty-Five: Amgeforn

The letter came by Raven; Levi puffed into my office, a sheaf of rolled parchment clutched in his fist. "Lady Sierra! Where is Commander Alistair?" Levi had quickly learned that the fastest way to find a particular Warden was generally to ask another Warden -- or me. I wondered what he thought about that. It's a bit surprising that no one ever asks, honestly.

"Levi? I think Alistair's outside training. Why? What do you have there?"

"An urgent letter from Teyrn Fergus for the Commander. Well, it's addressed to Commander Aedan, but it looks to be official Warden business, not personal. It's sealed."

I stood and popped my head out into the hallway, asking my bodyguards to send someone outside to bring Alistair in -- "Urgently, yes?" A nearby servant was pressed into messenger service, and Levi and I settled into chairs to wait. I was tempted to break the seal myself; Alistair would tell me what the message was, and I doubted he'd be seriously upset with me -- but it wasn't my place. I wasn't a Warden, at least officially, and acting like I had some authority over them wouldn't help Alistair or me.

I could feel sunshine before I heard the pounding steps of a heavily armoured man hurrying down the hallway. I smiled towards the door almost involuntarily, just as Alistair's handsome face poked around the open door frame, looking from me to Levi quickly before the rest of him followed into my small study and closed the door behind himself.

He came over and perched on the couch beside me, reaching out to take my hand. He was red-faced and sweaty, and I guessed he'd been pulled out of the middle of a sparring session -- but his hair was perfect anyway. I could feel my eyes crinkle with fond amusement as I squeezed his hand.

"Okay?" he whispered to me, not that Levi wouldn't have heard it clearly, sitting only a few feet away.

I nodded. "You've got mail," I quipped, gesturing to Levi with a tilted head.

My seneschal reached out and handed the roll of parchment to my husband. "This came by Raven, for Commander Aedan. It didn't look like it could wait until he returned."

Alistair examined the seal -- a Cousland laurel -- with a frown. The word 'urgent' was clearly visible in a messy scrawl on the outside of the scroll. He glanced at Levi. "You have no idea what this is about?"

"Oh, for Maker's sake, I'm dying of curiosity here. Open it, please? He wouldn't have written 'urgent' on a personal letter, and Aedan told him he was going into the Deep Roads. It's got to be Warden business."

With a reluctant sigh, he cracked the seal with his thumb. "I just can't help but think I'm going to wish that raven hadn't made it." He fell silent for a minute, eyes jumping across the page as he read quickly. "Andraste's ashes! Well, we're both right -- it couldn't wait, and I am definitely going to regret ever opening this."

"What is it?" I took the scroll as Alistair handed it to me; I was hoping for him to summarise what he'd just read for both Levi and I.

"There's been some sort of collapse around the cliffs near Highever, and it uncovered an entrance to the Deep Roads. There's been a few darkspawn attacks. Fergus is taking most of his forces to contain it, but he needs Wardens to go in and find a way to close it off. It wouldn't go amiss if we brought some of your soldiers too, Love."

I nodded, jumping up and calling out into the hallway for someone to bring me Mhairi. "All right, who do we have available? Loghain, Sigrun, Oghren, Justice...Maker's sake, why did we leave all the warriors here? Jowan will have to come too, I think."

"Sierra..." Alistair's tone was cautious. "You need to stay here." Levi nodded his agreement.

"Not a chance!" I objected. "I—"

He stopped me, a serious expression on his face. "It's not about your abilities or your safety, Sierra. But we're going to leave the Peak without Wardens. We can't do that -- not with..." He waggled his head, trying not to gesture in the direction of the basement and our own Deep Roads entrance -- and our entombed 'guest'. "We need someone here who can sense darkspawn and deal with problems, if they arise." His face was pale, and I knew he was thinking about the Architect. "You're needed here."

I scowled at my husband, but his expression was sincere, and he wasn't wrong. I scratched my nose, thinking furiously. There's got to be some way... "Faren! He's not fully healed. He can stay."

Alistair nodded, approaching me cautiously, reaching out to put his hands on my shoulders. Levi turned away, granting us the illusion of privacy. "You're right -- but he can't do what you do. He's injured. What's he going to do if darkspawn attack the tunnel?" He lifted my chin until I met his gaze. "Please. It's not about me protecting you."

I nodded reluctantly, unable to dispute his logic, but still not happy about what it meant. He pulled me closer, pressing our foreheads together; we stayed like that until Mhairi bustled into the room, followed by a worried Avanna. I pulled away from Alistair and turned to the two women who led my soldiers.

"Captains, there's been a darkspawn attack in Highever, and Lord Fergus is calling for aid. How many soldiers can you have ready to leave at daybreak?"

It was decided that Mhairi would go with the vast majority of our troops; they'd leave behind enough for basic patrols if everyone worked longer hours and skipped days off. Then Levi and Mhairi rushed off to make arrangements -- that many soldiers would need supplies. Alistair followed them out to prepare the Wardens. It left me behind, disconsolate, still holding the roll of parchment, with Avanna, who eyed me sympathetically.

"I'm surprised you're staying behind." I'd finally talked her out of calling me 'my lady' or 'your highness' -- at least in private.

I sighed. "No choice. Alistair wants to take all of the Wardens except Faren -- which means I need to stay."

She nodded wryly. "And you look like you're handling it well." Her grin was impish.

I rolled my eyes and snorted. "I'd like to be personally present to keep my husband alive when he fights literal monsters. So sue me." I shook my head at her confused expression. Modern jargon is hard to completely eliminate. "Never mind. But seriously, you get bent out of shape when I leave you behind -- and I'm just your boss."

She laughed at me -- then left to help Mhairi with preparing the troops.

The rest of the day passed in a blur; I reorganised patrols for the soldiers remaining behind, touched base with Faren to plan our own Warden patrols while everyone else was gone, and helped the cook organise rations for those leaving. I was impressed with her planning; she had barrels of salted meat, jerky, biscuits, and other rations that stored well and wouldn't go bad. Clearly someone warned her about Grey Wardens and our urgent trips.

We all ate together -- a rushed, distracted affair -- and retired early. I tried contacting Aedan through the sending crystal several times, but he never answered.

Back in our rooms, Alistair was solicitous, clearly concerned that I remained irritated with him for leaving me behind. And there was no hiding that I wasn't happy about it -- but I didn't blame him. It was true that someone needed to stay behind, and Levi and Loghain, amongst others, had made sure to stop in and indicate their approval that I was staying. I couldn't be angry at him for telling the truth.

However, given my history of over-reacting to his unintentionally condescending behaviour, I knew just saying so wasn't going to make him stop worrying about it. I contemplated the various things I could say -- and felt tired even at the thought of the long, drawn-out discussion that would lead to.

I chose a different tactic: distraction.

I turned to him, where he sat in a chair in front of our hearth looking anxious, staring into the fire pensively. I leaned over and thumbed off the arcane lamp, leaving the room dim, lit only by the low fire. His skin looked golden in the shifting light, his features more chiselled, and I took a moment to just admire him and be thankful that despite everything, we'd found each other.

I reached up to the buttons at my neck -- the pant suits I wore had high collars -- and flipped one of them open with my thumb. "If you're leaving at daybreak, husband, you have some duties to fulfill before you leave."

Alistair whipped his head around to look at me, his eyes widening as he noticed the skin rapidly being bared before him.

He grinned, licking his lips. "As you wish."

I shivered at the look in his eyes. I never should have told him about 'The Princess Bride'.

*****

Being alone at the Peak -- for the second time -- was an unappealing experience. I hated sleeping alone, hated missing my husband's adorably confused face first thing in the morning every day. It was cold, between the mountainous elevation and the winter, and I couldn't seem to get warm no matter how much wood I heaped on the fire in my room. I took to using my new cloak as a blanket, relying on the warmth runes to make it through the nights. And I couldn't shake the anxiety, the feeling of impending doom, that seemed to settle on me. I wasn't sure if it was some reaction to what had happened to me the last time I was alone -- nightmares of my time in the Architect's strange dungeon plagued me every time I closed my eyes.

I was lonely, missing the touch of my family and the comraderie of my friends. The staff at the Peak were friendly enough, but I was their boss, not their friend. None of them wanted to share meals and card games with their employer, especially one they all insisted on thinking of as a princess. I threw myself into my work, finally catching up on the endless paperwork that Levi presented me with, just to keep busy.

I finally got through to Aedan after Alistair had left; he was concerned by the report from Fergus, and decided to turn back -- he was still a month away, even if he started back immediately. They had finally reached tunnels that showed on the maps Shale and Caridin had brought from Orzammar, though there were a number of side-tunnels he was still hoping to explore on the way.

I spoke with Alistair every evening by sending crystal; I was sure that without that little gold lump, I'd have lost my mind entirely. As it was, I was determined not to let Alistair know how miserable I was -- he was already feeling guilty enough about leaving me behind. So we chatted about inconsequential things, just relishing the opportunity to talk at all despite being so far apart.

I slept with the sending crystal in my hand, and wore it around my neck every day.

Faren had volunteered to take the night shift, since I had so much Peak business to do during the days; he would do a brief patrol early in the morning before handing off to me, and I'd do another at lunch and supper before meeting with him in the evenings to do a patrol together. He was almost as restless as I was, sick of his limitations, his fatigue, and too many days spent lounging around trying to recover. There was no one to spar with -- the soldiers remaining at the Peak were working long shifts to cover for their absent peers, and were simply too tired to train at the end of it. So I took to sparring with him every evening before bed. The exercise might help me sleep, anyway.

Despite his limitations, a lifetime of training and fighting soon had him easily surpass my skill, and then the sessions changed -- he began training me, pushing me to improve even more, and we both started practicing archery together. We hadn't had time, during the Blight, to learn new skills; I'd been overwhelmed by trying to survive and master my templar abilities. Picking up a finesse weapon like a longbow would have taken valuable time from the rest of my training. But now, I found the repetition and tranquility of firing arrows at the archery butts almost mesmerising.

It was at least a good distraction, even if I spent more time collecting arrows from snowbanks than actually firing.

It was a dull day, about a week after Alistair had left, when I learned we had a problem. Alistair had defeated a good-sized raiding party of darkspawn the day before, and so he'd been late for our appointment with the sending crystals; I was cranky from having stayed up too late talking, and worrying. They were going to be entering the tunnel from which the darkspawn were emerging, together with Fergus and some of his troops, so I went on my lunchtime patrol absent-mindedly, still fretting about the risks he would be taking down there. Fergus had refused to stay behind, insisting on risking himself to accompany them; I worried almost as much about that as I did my husband. And I hadn't heard from Aedan in two days. It wasn't that unusual; time took on new meaning -- or lack thereof -- underground, and he was busy mapping tunnels and fighting deepstalkers and darkspawn. But it made me antsy -- and lonely.

I sighed and pulled on my cloak as I left the Keep, checking in with the team patrolling the mines, then dropping in to say hello to Mikhael and Felsi. My personal guard -- a young elven woman named Dera, a surprisingly strong warrior despite her diminutive size, newly recruited from Highever -- followed me silently. Back inside, shivering despite my warm clothing, I popped up to say hello to Jowan, then headed reluctantly into the basement.

Work was proceeding slowly down there; we didn't need dungeons, or storage rooms, and the sheer quantity of junk that had accumulated in the rooms down there made the job of cleaning it out irritating at best. We had far more need of sleeping quarters for soldiers and servants, so priority had been given to those projects -- but obviously someone had been detailed to begin sorting, because crates, pieces of broken furniture, and piles of garbage occupied every nook in the corridor. It smelled dusty, but also moldy, and I wondered if there had been water damage at some point.

I nodded to the two soldiers standing outside the unmarked door hiding an eluvian; we'd been asked repeatedly by various soldiers and servants what was inside, but had decided to keep it a secret -- at least until I had the chance to discuss it with Morrigan. I continued down the hallway, turning the corner that led to our Deep Roads entrance. We had every reason to believe it was secure; Aedan was in the Deep Roads, and the chances of him missing groups of darkspawn large enough to threaten us were slim, but with the Architect buried down there, I couldn't seem to shake the nervousness that plagued me every time I thought of that door.

I exchanged greetings with the guards posted in front of the door, taking the time to concentrate on my darkspawn sense; I could feel the low hum that always accompanied the Deep Roads -- like the very stone had been corrupted -- but it was very soft. It had been many years since darkspawn had passed nearby, and Avernus' barriers seemed to be holding -- no one would be able to sense the Architect. With reluctance, I gestured to the guard to open the massive door, as I did every time, and I left the guards behind to wander a little ways down the tunnel. Dera followed me stubbornly, even when I tried to convince her to wait. Nothing jumped out at us, and our own echoing footsteps were the only sounds I could hear. Satisfied, I turned back, and had just stepped through the massive dwarven door when I heard shouting from down the hall -- back towards the stairs leading up.

I detailed one soldier to close the door and stay put, while Dera and the other followed me towards the source of the commotion. I rounded the corner to see two panic-stricken guards, swords drawn, facing the door to the eluvian with wide, frightened eyes.

"Thank the Maker! My lady..." He gestured to the door, but didn't need to say anything more; I could clearly see what had set them off.

There was brilliant white light -- brighter than daylight -- seeping through the cracks between the door and frame all the way around.

Morrigan? I wondered if she'd somehow found a different eluvian, one connected to the one I had taken from the Dragonbone Wastes, and approached us from the wrong side.

Of course, eluvians had been known to be terrible, evil things; granted, the one I knew about had been tainted, but I wasn't taking any chances. If it wasn't Morrigan, Andraste only knew what could come out of the eluvian. Thanking the Maker for the armour I'd been wearing -- patrolling in fancy clothes would have been ridiculous -- I drew my daggers and turned to the soldier who'd followed me from the Deep Roads entrance.

"Hurry -- run upstairs, send someone to wake Warden Faren, get Enchanter Wynne, and get every able-bodied person you can find, everyone who can wield a weapon, down to the foyer at the bottom of the stairs. Tell Captain Avanna not to approach, just hold the line at the stairs. I will send further orders when I get to the bottom of this."

Nodding -- face pale, but expression resolute -- the soldier scrambled away, leaving me with Dera and the remaining two soldiers, all of us strangely lit in the weird light from the room beyond the door. I felt a strong pull to just slip inside to check on the eluvian without waiting for the backup I had coming.

"Listen, you three. I need you all to promise to keep what I'm about to tell you to yourselves. Okay?"

They nodded at me uncertainly. I took a deep breath as I tried desperately to think about what I was going to say.

"There's a magical artifact in this room. I don't know much about it, but we brought it here to keep it safe. I think I know what's happening -- but I can't be sure until I look. However, I don't want the three of you involved. It could be dangerous and I won't put you at risk unnecessarily."

Dera scowled. "And what sort of bodyguard would I be if I left you to face it alone? Never mind that Avanna would have my head. I happen to like breathing, my Lady."

I snorted. "Avanna is well aware of my tendencies. Just remind her you're not the first bodyguard I've ordered away."

"But..."

"Have you heard the stories, Dera? That I'm a templar?" She nodded. "This is something only I can do." I tried to look confident; I truly had no idea what was happening, but wouldn't risk any of my people to a magic mirror, or to Morrigan's tender mercies if they surprised her. I love my friend, but she's not nearly as averse to collateral damage as I am. And I'm more and more certain that I have to go in there alone. "So once Avanna is set, here's what we're going to do. I'm going to unlock the door and slip inside. You're going to lock it behind me. And then you're going to wait. If I...if I don't make it out, you should have time to run back to the foyer and make a stand with the others. If that happens, send word to Commander Aedan, Commander Alistair, Knight Commander Greagoir at Kinloch Hold, and the Teyrn."

I turned and made eye contact with them, expression firm. "No matter what, do not come through that door. You are to stay outside and defend. Are we clear?"

They nodded again, and then we waited, impatiently, hearing the jangle of armour and thumps of heavy footsteps as soldiers assembled in the foyer probably thirty feet down the hallway and around a corner. I left the two guards where they were and popped out to the foyer to check on their preparations. I found Avanna calmly directing a dozen soldiers, with more filtering in as she worked. I didn't see Wynne, but Faren came through the door looking cross, and I pulled him aside briefly.

"Look, I think -- I hope -- we're dealing with Morrigan here. You don't remember her, but she's a friend."