Through the Veil Ch. 01

CHAPTER 1

To The Other Side

If you have never taken LSD before, it is a difficult experience to describe. Even if you have tried acid, if you've never had a shitload of it at once, you may have only scratched the surface.

Jake had just taken a shitload of acid.

He was at his friend's house, getting a little high and hanging out. Jake had just dropped out of college, for all the classic reasons, and was directionless, to say the least.

His friend Chad was also his drug dealer, and, despite recently moving back in with his parents, Chad's house was where Jake spent most of his time. He just felt a bit too judged seeing his family all the time. Plus, Chad's house had better snacks... and drugs.

After a particularly monster rip from an almost sarcastically large bong, Jake had found himself in a bit of a coughing fit. In the grip of this fit, he ran downstairs to the kitchen for a glass of water.

After a few gulps and a few moments of collecting himself, Jake and his glass of water made their way back through the house. As he approached the stairs, on the living room coffee table he noticed a little flavor dropper thing that makes water red and sugary.

This was not the type of thing the (now very high) young man could turn down. He gave his drink a big ol squirt, just before his cough came back with a vengeance. However, this time he was ready for it, and immediately chugged his water. It was neither red, nor sugary, but it did the trick. He shrugged and headed upstairs.

"He is alive," Chad greeted him with a smile, and a freshly loaded bong. He was the type of person who was far more likely to be smoking weed at any given moment than most people are found eating or sleeping.

Still recovering, Jake waved him off. After a mild attempt at peer pressure, Chad took the hit for himself.

"You're a machine, dude," Jake said, with a 70/30 blend of admiration and worry.

"It's just weed, bro," Chad replied as smoke drifted out of his mouth. "Which reminds me, I just got some fire LSD in, you gotta try it. Straight liquid, not even tabs. Shit is POWERFUL."

Jake wasn't quite high enough to miss connecting those dots. He asked his friend if that was what was in the flavor dropper thing downstairs.

It was.

He was getting nervous as he told Chad what he had just done, and asked if this was gonna fuck up his day. Chad replied with a 70/30 blend of admiration and worry.

It was.

Jake had done acid before, and though he wasn't planing on tripping for 12 hours that day, he wasn't really planning for anything else either. So he had no trouble switching to excitement about having a nice trip.

"I don't know, man," Chad was clearly nervous, but also trying to not freak out his friend before the drugs kicked in. " I don't want you to freak, but, like, what's the biggest hit of acid you've ever done?"

"Uh... last year I took like a whole strip, was fucking catatonic man. Was awesome and mind-blowing, but a lil rough if I'm being honest."

Chad proceeded to give a lesson about LSD. He explained that to make strips, a dealer puts a few drops of liquid on a sheet of paper. Those drops spread out to cover the whole sheet, or about ten hits, which is most definitely a lot of acid. But by that math, that's only a few drops for a whole sheet, and Jake had just taken a flavor-blast size squirt. So, chances were that he had just taken over 100 hits, minimum.

Like I said. Jake had just taken a shitload of acid.

Chad had to leave and serve some people, but told Jake he was welcome to stay and hang at his place. He told him to put some music on and get as comfortable as possible, cause shit was about to get real.

Jake was setting up his little safe place on the living room couch as Chad was heading out the door.

Seconds later, Chad came back inside and peeked around the corner at his friend whose mind was about to melt.

"Hey man," Chad called to his friend, unable to hide his concern. "Everything's gonna be cool, don't even sweat it. You are in for a wild ride."

"Thanks man, and thanks for letting me stay here for this."

"Of course, anytime. Also, not to add insult to injury but..."

Chad seemed to be having a hard time finishing the sentence.

"What is it?!" Jake asked after the pause went on too long.

"Well... you owe me prolly like a hundred bucks for all that acid." And he was gone.

Fuckin' Chad.

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37 minutes later...

As he began to feel the first stirring in his stomach and the back of his head, Jake was feeling zen.

He had the music going, he had a nice fuzzy blanket, had the visualizer playing trippy shit on the TV, and was feeling pretty prepared.

Thinking back, even when he took the ten hits that one time, tripping really wasn't as crazy as people think. Your vision gets wavy, your thoughts are all over the place, and you feel a bit thrown about. It's like the feeling of being in the ocean for a while. After letting a few waves crash over you, when you get out of the water, and you still feel like you are getting tossed around. It's like that, but also being wasted. And also being exhaustingly philosophical.

As Jake felt waves beginning to crash over him, he comforted himself with the thought of being drunk and pondering life at the beach.

"That's all this is going to be," he said to himself. "Drunk, philosophical, beach-chilling."

While he had heard tales of people having crazy visuals and hallucinations, there seemed to be a consensus in the druggy community that those people were full of shit.

"Just drunk, philosophical, beach-chilling."

The waves he felt crashing over him and flowing through him seemingly supporting his conclusion, he started to allow himself to be excited.

"This is gonna be fun," he thought.

He wasn't going to appear in a magical forest or wake up at the grocery store. He was comfortable and safe.

"Just beach-chilling," he thought as he closed his eyes and let the music flow through him.

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15 minutes later...

Well, he was about half right. He didn't appear in a magical forest and he was beach-chilling.

He was wrong, however, to assume all the stories of wild hallucinations were false. Though most of them are, most people don't take hundreds of hits of acid.

His eyes still closed, Jake felt a rush of water flowing over him and then was sure that the LSD was kicking in full force as he felt his brain and guts and soul start doing somersaults inside of him.

The waves crashed over him harder and harder, mashing into him and coursing through his body like electricity. The music sounded muffled and far away.

A particularly strong wave smacked him in the head and forced his eyes open.

He was still in Chad's apartment, in the same spot, comfy on the couch. He breathed a sigh of relief.

But as he exhaled, he felt himself sink deeper into the couch. Then he watched as the room and world around him started to melt and swirl together, pulling him in and melting him down at the same time.

Next thing he knew, Jake was on a sort of psychedelic beach, forged from the colors and sounds of Chad's living room. He couldn't see his surroundings as much as he could feel them. He still knew where he was, but couldn't help but feel like he was on the beach.

Then he heard the soothing sounds of waves, gently crashing, and walked towards the window.

Outside he saw the most beautiful ocean. Like a box of melted crayons, the people and grass and trees and cars all blended together and flowed around the house. Jake felt serene, and in awe at the beauty of it all.

He closed his eyes and could hear the waves crashing, seemingly inviting him to jump in.

He could even hear a lovely, soothing voice welcoming him, calling to him, embracing him. Not quite male and not quite female, the first thing that popped into Jake's head was that it was the voice of an angel.

"Flow," it said slowly and peacefully, "just flow."

That was it, Jake realized. He didn't want to jump in the ocean, he wanted to become a part of it. To melt into the flow of the world.

A bit over-zealously, Jake ran to the front door and opened it. The sudden blast of noise and light and activity forcefully knocked him back into the house. He would not be going outside anytime soon.

"Just flow," Jake heard once again, and he knew what he needed to do.

He walked to the upstairs bathroom and began filling the bathtub.

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As the tub filled and steam began to float up from the water's surface, Jake took his clothes off.

He remained focused on the water, on the window, on anything besides the mirror. Looking at your reflection when you are tripping can be a bit much, and Jake was cognizant enough to remember that fact.

The steam felt good and strange and beautiful against his bare skin, and he closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

"Look."

Jake turned quickly, sure he had heard the same voice earlier, and opened his eyes. He was staring at his reflection.

Physically, Jake was about as average as a guy could be. Average build, with a bit of a belly developing, as the recent lethargic years began to cover up the older, more active ones. Hairy, but not overly so. Decent looking face, that held his best feature, his crystal-blue eyes.

Jake was not one to care much for physical appearance and all that superficial junk, but that didn't stop insecurity from creeping in from time to time. Recently, he would take longer to remove his shirt at the beach or by the pool, trying to hide his body for a little longer.

But that was not the Jake that he saw in the mirror. The Jake looking back at him was oozing confidence and joy. While his body was the same, he was somehow wearing it better. He looked good and it made him feel good. He even moved in closer to get a better look, leaning against the sink with his face almost against the glass.

As Jake stared into his reflection, he somehow started getting lost in his own eyes. The thin black lines surrounding his irises seemed to struggle to contain the stained glass shards of blue and gray that surrounded his waxing and waning pupils. He felt like he was on the beach again, with the waves crashing in rhythm with his pupils as they dilated and constricted.

It was beautiful, he thought. I am beautiful, he thought. He had never felt that way before, but he was sure of it.

"You are."

The angel voice replied to his thought this time, filling Jake with a rush of love, while also confirming that it existed only in his mind. He didn't mind, though. He felt safer with his guardian angel.

Jake continued to stare at his reflection, constantly noticing new parts of himself that he liked, as the water began to approach the top of the tub. The steam began to fog up the mirror and Jake watched in awe as the streaks and clouds of vapor slowly blotted away at his reflection.

The steam enveloped him, and, as his reflection faded, he saw ghostly hands wrap around his chest, as if embracing him from behind. He felt a presence leaning against his back, coiling around him with warmth and joy. As the last shreds of his reflection disappeared, Jake saw and felt many more vapor hands wrapping around him and pulling him from his personal staring contest.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath of the steam. The warmth that was embracing him flowed into his mouth and nose as he inhaled, and filled him with perfect comfort, down to his core. For a moment, he felt like he was a part of everything.

"You are."

This time the voice was a whisper in his ear. Before it felt like a thought or maybe a distant calling, but this time he felt it, and he knew it wasn't in his head.

A shiver ran down his spine and goosebumps popped up all over his body, originating from the ear that had just received the heavenly whisper. It didn't feel scary or dangerous though. It felt like a girl whispering into his ear as they made love. Her voice ebbing and flowing, crashing like waves into his ears as his hips thrust into her and out again.

Jake stood for a moment, smiling dumbly as the shivers crisscrossed his body, watching a highlight reel in his mind of all his various sexual encounters over the years, until another whisper snapped him into the present.

"Flow. Just flow."

He looked to the tub. It was almost full. He shut off the water, and stepped in.

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The water was a little too hot, but the burning sensation was electricity to his tripping nerves, and he felt like he could faint from the overwhelming rush of it. He quickly found all but his head submerged.

He looked down at his body as it refracted and diffused into the water. With one exception, he saw himself become like water, a part of the flow.

The exception was his penis, which he hadn't really thought of until that point. All the sensations from the steam and water had left him almost fully erect, and the head of his cock floated up, poking its way out from the water. As he watched it bobbing up and down, he couldn't help but let out a little giggle. It looked a bit silly, as penises tend to look, and the moment of levity snapped his tripping mind to reality, if only for a moment.

He reflected on all the sights, sounds and feelings he had experienced since the acid kicked in, and started laughing even more. He felt ridiculous, laying in his drug dealer's bathtub, trying to become a part of the flow of the world, because an angel told him to. He was experiencing a classic moment in any trip, a moment that almost everyone experiences, when you are compelled to say one sentence out loud, even if no one is there to hear.

"Holy fuck I'm tripping hard," Jake said.

For a moment, he was back in reality, looking at himself and having a laugh, yet fully aware that he was still deep in a trip and would likely return in another moment. At least the moment of clarity reminded him that all the strange sights, sounds, and feelings were in his head. None of it was real.

"REAL!"

This time there was emotion in his angel's voice, as though it was desperate for Jake to believe in it, and was sad that for a moment he didn't. There was no whisper in his ear this time, but a sort of echo in the back of his mind. The echo bounced up and down in his head, and he began to rock his body forward and back, creating little waves in the tub that crashed over the side and sprayed water like ocean mist into his face.

"Yay! See! Just flow."

The voice was once again a whisper, this time noticeably more feminine, seductive, and excited. It didn't trickle across his skin like the last few, but hit him like a truck, causing his back to arch and crash back into the water, splashing a large amount out of the tub. Yet, Jake couldn't worry about getting water everywhere, as he was once again feeling embraced and enveloped by... something.

This time, however, was far more intense than the steam had been. What had been gentle and subtle, like lying in a bed of soft grass, was now firmer and more deliberate. It felt like thick, heavy ribbons of cloth wrapping their way around his body, mummifying him in a loving embrace. It was a little scary, but he felt confident that he would be okay, and he tried to relax.

"Shhhh. Breath. Just breath."

The voice had sensed his uneasiness, and now spoke like a mother trying to calm her child. The sound of her voice felt like it was cradling him and brushing its fingers through his hair. He took a deep breath, and, in an instant, he was calm.

Looking down at his body, Jake could see that he wasn't wrapped in anything besides water, but he still felt something there, almost like a blanket that had been tucked around him. Some water was still dripping off the sides of the tub, and the pitter-patter on the bathroom floor brought chaos to a world that Jake was trying to make as serene as possible. He closed his eyes and put his head under the water.

With no sights or sounds attacking him, he just laid there for a moment, trying to clear his mind.

The warmth he had felt surrounding and holding him began to shift, flowing around his body, as though it were teasing him. It expanded and contracted, and he began to move his hips in rhythm with it. With his eyes still closed, he popped up for a breath, and then sunk back in.

He enjoyed the silence of having his ears under, but decided he could let one sense back in, and opened his eyes. Through the water he could see a distorted view of the bathroom, which he thoroughly examined, fascinated by every fractured angle and broken line. Suddenly, he felt the ribbons tightening around him and looked down.

There was definitely something there. It moved around him, like a tube or a tentacle, coiling tighter and tighter.

"Just flow."

That's right, that's what it was. It was a current flowing through the water, swirling its way around his body. His guardian angel's call had once again eased his soul, and the warm current surrounding him felt gentle and loving, and Jake felt overwhelmed with gratitude. He shot his head out of the water, and closed his eyes to hold back the grateful tears as he tried to thank the disembodied voice.

"Thank you," he whispered into the air..

"Shhhh." He felt something press down on his head, as though it were telling him to go back under.

Jake plunged his head under, eager to do anything he could for his protector. Once again, he opened his eyes. The current was still visibly enveloping him, and this time he took the time to follow its path. At his feet, he saw it was actually flowing upward, breaching the surface like a water spout, yet leading to nowhere. Disappointed, Jake looked all around for the source of the flow.

That's when he saw her. She was there, visible only out of the corner of his eye, refracted through water, like a kaleidoscope stuck in place. For a moment, Jake and his angel locked eyes.

Then, suddenly feeling somehow unworthy, Jake closed his eyes.

He felt her moving down, closer to him, until he could feel a body snuggled along his side, and warm breath on his neck. He opened his eyes and looked, but there was nothing there. Still feeling something very close to him, he sighed, having a hard time wrapping his mind around what was real and what wasn't.

"Real." This time she whispered softly into his ear, clearly aware that he wouldn't require much convincing.

Jake smiled, and he felt his angel smile too.

"Hello Jake."

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"Don't fear."

Surprisingly, Jake's tripping mind was having no trouble accepting his angel's existence, and he wasn't afraid at all. Her every motion and word felt charged with love and care. He felt safe.

Even as he felt the current wrap around him, tighter than ever, even as he felt her growing heavier and heavier on top of him, he felt completely safe.

"Don't fear."

Jake was starting to notice that he couldn't move, and he was very nearly out of breath. When he struggled and tried to snap his head up, she wrapped him up tighter and held him down firmer.

"Breathe. Don't fear. Just breathe."

He felt a kiss on his forehead that was so reassuring that he couldn't possibly believe she meant him any harm at all. In fact, he was 100% sure meant the opposite. She was on his side, she was his guardian angel.

So, still submerged, Jake took a breath. He felt the warm water flow into him as his mind faded to nothingness.

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When he came back to, Jake was still in the tub, but now it was empty. He was in the same bathroom, yet it was different, like the colors weren't quite right, and the walls all shifted. He felt a hand brush through his hair, and looked in it's direction.