To New Beginnings Ch. 04

I awoke to the alarm clock blaring, hopping out of bed immediately, pulling on the pair of pink silky panties from the night before, pulling on my own baggy t-shirt that I brought back with me and then heading over to the kitchen to start the long but enjoyable process of making coffee. Jenn slowly aroused, propping her head up with her hand, smiling at me, happy with how well she had already been training me in my new role.

I returned with the coffees in the travel mugs, taking a sip, as she pulled the container from under the bed once again, pulling me out a new set of her old gym clothes. Grey yoga pants, pink sports bra, tank top and thong. I pulled them on, not fighting it at all at this point, accepting my position. She did the same herself getting dressed in her clothes. Then she began to pack two bags, one for herself and one for me.

"Since I don't have any clients on Tuesdays, we will always do grocery shopping Tuesdays. So, it makes sense just to get ready at the gym, rather than coming home, just to go back out," she said instructively, "I've put you together all the things, you will need for your shower, plus the outfit you wore on Saturday to the mall. We will need to hit up some thrift stores to get you a few more outfits, once you hit the goal weight then we can go for the expensive high quality clothes."

She held out the plaid skirt and the black see through crop sweater, this time with a pink bra and panties, which I quickly realized would be visible under the sweater. She packed them into the small pink leather bag with the big Lululemon logo on it, handing it to me. I grabbed it for some reason slinging it over my shoulder like I had seen so many girls do with purses, something just felt correct about it. We headed down the elevator to her car, I guess our car now but in reality it was still hers, I was just going to be given permission to use it. She offered me the keys, holding them out in her open hand.

"Wanna drive today?" she asked.

"Absolutely!" I answer excitedly.

I took the keys, put them in the ignition, then reached for the clutch but hit nothing but floor and the side of the brake pedal. 'Damn, automatic.' I thought to myself having not previously noticed that she didn't drive stick. It always amazed me that people would buy a sports car and get it in an automatic but I guess an entry level 3 series coupe was barely a sports car. It wasn't like she was rolling around in a M3. I turned the key, hearing the engine roar to life still sounded delightful despite the transmission.

We pulled out of the parking garage and headed off to the gym. I did my usual Tuesday cardio workout. Getting much too sweaty as was my normal, even after losing so much weight, my body temperature always ran hot. I finished up, noticing that Jenn was close to finishing herself. I didn't even try to fight with her today, I just picked up my pink gym bag and headed to the change room. I stopped before entering. Trying to plan out what I would do. I slowly walked in and to my surprise, there was no one there. I put my bag into one of the lockers, stripping down to nothing but the cage, grabbing the travel bag containing the shampoo, conditioner, body wash and lube. I headed for the shower happily, looking at my ass in the mirror as I walked by. I went into the shower, taking the plug out finally, which at this point I was getting used to, it was hardly even an annoyance anymore... maybe I need a bigger one... with that thought in my head, I wash hair and body, making sure to get my butt hole extra clean. Finishing up in the shower, walking back to the still empty change room with the towel wrapped around my chest, and dried my hair with the blow dryer. Getting dressed into the thong, bra, skirt and crop sweater.

As I was sitting pulling my sweater over my head, I opened my eyes to find a huge cock in front of my face. I looked up to see the guy who had called me a sissy yesterday.

He smiled down at me, "Jenn told me that you would please me. I made sure that the change room would be nice and empty for you to get all feminized and ready for me. She told me that you did a very good job last night on the dildo but it's time for you to get the real thing."

My jaw hit the floor, thankfully not literally, my eyes as wide as saucers at the huge cock right in front of my face. It was bigger than the dildo, which was 7 inches, so his cock must have been at least 9 inches possibly more and it was much thicker too.

"Come on, get to sucking my cock, you slut" he said angrily.

I must have been staring at it for too long. Was I really about to suck this strangers dick... but the musk, something about his smell, I could see the precum glistening off the top of his cut cock. Without giving it, another thought more, I reached my hand out to his dick holding it my hand, guiding myself to the tip, licking the precum off of it. He let out a bit of groan. I took the head of his dick into my mouth; it was so big that I could almost feel my lips having to stretch to get all the way around it. I sucked on the head of his massive cock for a bit until he began applying pressure to the back of my head. I attempted to coat his cock with as much saliva as I could produce with his cock still in my mouth, swirling my tongue around the girth. I knew from my experience last night, that was my key to getting more of it in. I took more and more of his cock in my mouth. I did my best to fit as much of his monster cock down my throat. I opened my eyes to see myself only a couple of inches from the base. I started bobbing my head up and down, which made his groans increase in volume. I was determined to take as much of his cock as I could and hoped that I could take all of it. I bobbed up and down, on every down motion, taking more and more of his cock into my throat.

I had almost reached the bottom when he grabbed me by the back of the head hard and started fucking my mouth. I could feel my nose hitting his pubic hair every time he made it all the way, I was trying to gasp for air but his huge cock prevented it. I tried to focus on breathing through my nose as he continued with not a care in the world as to what I was going through. He finally stopped as I reached the bottom one more time, he held my head there and made a load groan. I could feel his dick begin to spasm and from my own experience with my own, I knew what was cumming and cum he did. Almost causing me to choke on the salty liquid as I tried to swallow as much as I could but some leaked out of my mouth on to my chin and dribbled down on to the top of my sweater. The only gross part was that some of it even came out of my nose. He pulled his cock out of my mouth, demanding that I clean him up. I did licking every inch of his cock, making sure it was all clean. He smiled placing two $100 bills down beside me. Then he reached inside my sweater to my bra and put another $100 in there.

"This is a tip for you for you to use however you please, since you did such a good job of making me cum. There is more of that for you any time you want to service me." He smiled cruelly as he walked away.

I had just sucked my first real cock... and it was of a total stranger who had been an ass to me on our only interaction. I wasn't exactly sure how to feel. I was proud of myself that I was able to swallow his entire cock... and I felt good about giving him pleasure, I looked into my panties to see that I had coated them with my own cum... at some point during the whole thing I had orgasmed. A smile came across my face, looking into the mirror to see me covered in cum staring down at my wet panties, I felt my dick stain against the cage seeing the imagine. I looked like a porn star, just like the multiple videos I had seen of girls being coated in cum. It was a hot imagine and I was that hot girl in front of me.

I picked up the money, stuffing it into my gym bag. Walked over to the sink and washed my face. I attempted to clean the cum off my sweater but of course it had to leave a stain. I walked out of the change room to find Jenn waiting.

"Where is the money baby?" she questioned me seconds after stepping out.

I reached into my gym bag and handed her the two bills. "There. What was that all about anyways? He said that you had told him that I would be happy to please him."

"Well after your work on the dildo last night, I seen that you would be quite the good little cock sucker and plus like I said we would find other ways to help contribute to the increased costs of you living with me... and you are going to need to make a lot of money to buy all new clothing." She smiled sinisterly. "I have something to show you when we get home, so don't worry you won't have to suck all the dicks to afford your clothes."

I was mortified by what I just heard. Was I really going to have to suck dick and possibly more to be able to afford clothes and food... and what did she have to show me at home.

"Jenn, can we stop at home so I can at least get a fresh shirt on." I said pointing to the cum stain.

"No Stephanie, we won't be doing that. You need to learn how to swallow all the cum like a good little slut or you will have to deal with the consequences." She smiled widely.

"But it was such a massive load! There is no way that I will be able to ever get that all down." I protested.

"Well then, I guess you are just going to have to get used to walking around with cum on your clothes every time you service him then... Because I can guarantee you that he will be a repeat client and you are to service him any time he wants."

As we walked out of the gym, I could feel my cheeks burning red with embarrassment. It felt like everyone in the gym was staring at me and their eyes on cum stain. We finally made it out, to an oddly brisk summer morning, the cool air felt good on my face cheeks but felt like a sting on my bare legs. We got to the car, no offer of me driving this time, we headed off. My heart sunk when I realized we needed groceries and we likely going to be going to the store that I had just quit yesterday, it surprised me when we drove past. Silly girl, I thought to myself, Jenn likely shops at an organic store that had more vegetarian options and higher quality produce... Wait had I just referred to myself as a girl. Maybe I was getting a little more comfortable with this all than I had initially wanted. We drove to the organic grocery, that was located in a rich area just outside the downtown core. I let Jenn do the shopping following her around, not knowing what we should be getting. We finished at the store, heading off but we didn't go home, instead we stopped in front of what looked like a huge medical complex. On the door in front of stated in bold print 'Dr. A. Wagner, private M.D.'

"Come on Stephanie, we have to get you checked up!" Jenn said getting out of the car.

I was very confused, I mean getting a checkup wasn't a bad idea, we had no worries about the cost, one of the good parts about living in Canada, but I didn't think I really needed one. I had always hated doctor's offices. Something about the sterility of it all drove me nuts. The last time I had been in one was when I was 15 and the doctor gave me a script for acne that would not go away no matter what I did. Thankfully the meds took care of that. We walked through the door of the clinic.

A red headed girl in her mid-20s smiled from behind the desk. "Jennifer! Happy to see you again. I am so glad that we are finally getting to meet Stephanie."

"Hey Beth, I finally managed to drag her over here. I swear it like dealing with a child sometimes." Jennifer walked over to the desk, pulling me by my hand. Signing us in, our names on the appointment list. My name said Stephanie.

We sat in the office waiting to be called in. We sat in silence, I wasn't even sure what were doing here or how the girl at the front desk knew my name and seemed to know Jenn well. Eventually Beth stood up and called us over. Placing us into an empty doctor's room waiting for Dr. Wagner to finish up with his previous patient. The door opened, walked in through was the doctor, a man in his 50s, dark brown hair that had started to grey, he was in good shape but nothing crazy, the way you would expect a doctor of his age to look. He picked up the chart and motioned me to get up on the examination table. I hopped up on the table looking at him. He asked me to extend my arm and he drew several vials of blood after telling me that he needed. He was surprisingly good at it; I've had nurses whose entire job it was to take blood do worse. He called in Beth to take the vials.

"We are in the same complex as the processing lab, so we can get immediate results. We should have some numbers by the time we have completed the exam. Please take off all of your clothes." He seemed to see the worry in my eyes. "Don't worry your underwear can stay on."

I took my sweater and bra off then stood up to slide the skirt down my legs. He motioned me over to the scale. I stepped on it. 145 pounds, sweet I had lost another couple of pounds. He had me stand against a wall that had all the heights on it printed on the wall. I was now 5 foot 7 inches, somehow over the past 4 months I had managed to lose about two inches, maybe a little less, in height... I wasn't sure of my exact height, I had just always told people I was 5' 9" never being 100% sure about it. He then motioned me to sit back down on the table. He was very sweet, letting me know everything he was going to do before he did it. Touching my body but in a medical way, examining my pecs, my hips and even my hair. "Well Jennifer, it looked like the mixture of the meds and supplements you had recommended seems to be working out. If it continues going this well, I might have to start going through this regiment with my clients who are willing to try something different."

Jennifer smiled widely at the recognition. There was a knock at the door and Beth had a clipboard with a bunch of papers in her hand. She handed them to Dr. Wagner; he took them looking them over carefully. "Well Stephanie." He took a pause. "Your T levels are about half for someone of your birth sex and however your E levels are about double. So those the medication amounts have been good but we should double the dose of the testosterone blocker and Estrogen. Maybe even get you away from the pills and on to an injection since pills don't get processed by your body as well."

It all hit me like a ton of bricks. Suddenly everything came into clarity. Jennifer had been giving me testosterone blockers and estrogen since day one, along with whatever other supplements she had me taking. The cocktail of meds that the doctor complimented her on the results... My results... The results were me. I was a Guinea pig that she had been testing on. Had she done this before? The first day we met she had mentioned something about wanting a new project. Did I want this? I didn't hate it. I liked the way I looked now before no one had ever looked at me twice. Granted now this attention was mostly from men, maybe the occasional woman, although I assumed most of those looks were envy.

Looking feminine was something that I had grown more accustomed to over the past few days... and even more so than just accustomed to it, I had grown to enjoy it. Maybe there was something under the surface the whole time. I had never been particularly masculine other than playing football and hockey video games but that was more so for the game rather than enjoying the sports, and since I had found StarCraft, those games had gone by the waist side. There was also the other side to this all... having to pleasure men. I sure that I wasn't gay but maybe I was bi... or some other sexuality where I just enjoyed pleasing people in general... although, other than Tom at lunch on Saturday, I had not spent any time with men in a context like that... and that did feel really good. I thought about his hand on my thigh and got flush. Then I thought back to the blowjob I had given earlier in the day and how much I enjoyed doing that.

I looked over at Dr. Wagner, noticing the silence in the room, him and Jenn waiting for my response. This was my chance to bail or to accept what I had started to become and would further grow into. "Yeah, I think taking a few less pills would be nice, doubling both of them up sounds like the correct way to go if that's what you are recommending Doctor." I fluttered my eyelashes at him. Turning to see Jennifer's smile wide across her face.

"Well Stephanie, if that's how you feel, I will write the script up for you. There is a pharmacy here in the complex that you can get the injectable estrogen at, it can be a bit more of a pain to find then pills, patches or cream but you have to take it less often and it will have more natural ebbs and flows. Also, in a year or so down the road we can look at getting you an orchiectomy, removal of the testis, it is covered underneath provincial healthcare, so there will be no cost, then you won't have to take the T blockers anymore which at big doses can have some unpleasant side effects. Breast augmentation unfortunately is not being covered at the moment. There is talk about them adding funds for it but knowing this province, it will probably be a small amount and getting approval for it will likely be a mess. Lastly, there is the option of getting what is typically referred to as Gender Reassignment Surgery. Getting surgery to change your penis into a vagina. I will warn you right now that is very in-depth surgery and recovery can be brutal... If you want that you will need to see a psychologist to get a letter for recommendation since I can't approve that on my own. It always needs one doctor and one psychologist." Dr. Wagner spoke directly to me. I nodded unsure of what else to say.

With that he handed me the script for the estrogen and increased dosage of the testosterone blockers. We left and then dropped them off at the pharmacy to be filled. They said it would be about an hour so Jennifer took me out for lunch to kill time. We didn't speak much during lunch or on the car ride back to get the meds or on our way home.

Once home, I went and lied down in bed and turned on my iPod, putting my headphones on, letting the music fill my ears and head, putting me in a different world, alone with my thoughts, until Against Me -- The Ocean came on. It was off the new album and I hadn't paid full attention to the lyrics previously but the lyrics of the second verse rang out through my head, 'If I could have chosen, I would have been born a woman. My mother once told me that she would have named me Laura. I would grow up to be strong and beautiful like her.' I wondered in that moment if I had been born a woman what my mom would have named me... and if I would someday grow into a beautiful woman like her, my hair was about the same length as she had always kept hers. I looked over into the mirror, I was starting to look like a young version of her that I had seen in the old black and white photos turned a shade of dull yellow with time. It all came crashing down and I started to sob, listening to the song, over and over until I felt a hand on my shoulder. Jennifer gently removed my headphones.

"Are you okay Stephanie?" she asked as she wiped a tear from my eye in the gentle way my mom had done.

"I am not sure. This day has just been all so much. Such a wide range of emotions." I wiped the rest of the tears and snot from my face with my sleeve. It already needed to be washed from the cum stain.

"I am truly sorry for that... I should have been more honest with you about everything. Just that day when you came into the gym for the first time, I could see what a pretty girl you would make, there was something about the way you handled yourself and talked made me think you would like it as well... and I wanted you to be that way... but I am also a messed-up person with my own shitty history and I am sorry for bringing that down on you."