U-N-I Ch. 26

Rob giggled and picked another card.

"What is my greatest accomplishment as an artist?

He wrote,

"Playing Glastonbury" and I wrote, "The Grammy Awards''

"Oh, yeah," he said, snapping his fingers, "true. I should've answered that."

"Yeah. And now that I think about it, I'd also add all the organizations that we work with, especially LGBTQIA+. It's great to be able to help people and make a difference into their lives," I explained.

Rob agreed, "yes, we've always said that we didn't want to become, like, gay activists -- but it's important to play our part and help as much as we can."

Ellen nodded.

"What do you say to people who say that you're a gay band?" she asked with a giggle.

"We say it's true," Rob laughed and did too. "We may not all be gay in the band but the music we make is definitely about - how we feel," he said and looked at me briefly, "so yeah, we've never denied that you know, we do have a large gay following and a lot of female fans and sensitive men who like us and we're not afraid of having an emotional connection with our audience..."

I agreed with a nod. "Yes, and we love all people - and even though we're not loved by -- all people -- it's okay because the people who do love us are probably among the best citizens in the world you know, they're fantastic. They are so dedicated and protective of us and loyal, and we love them, so yeah, we are a gay band, and that's totally fine!" I concluded and Rob picked another question.

"What's my favourite workout song?"

"Oh, shit, that one's impossible. Do you even have a favourite?

"I don't know, let's take a wild guess," he answered and we obviously wrote different songs so we didn't get that point but started a conversation on the subject.

"I just love listening to music while running, it's just the best way to pump yourself during a run," Rob said.

"Where do you run? On the treadmill or outside?" Ellen asked.

"Honestly, running on the treadmill is kinda miserable but I can't always run outside, it depends on where we are."

"Yeah, he runs the risk of turning into Forest Gump".

He stared at me.

"I believe that was another reference!" I said, smartly.

"I believe it was," he agreed.

Another high-five.

Ellen smiled. "Now that you have to come back to L.A," she said to Rob, "I hope we'll see you again on the show," Ellen said.

"Of course. You know we love coming here," he said as I picked another card.

"Oooh."

"Veto?" he asked.

"Um, what the hell, it's a sexy question?" I shrugged and looked into his eyes, "What do I have to do to get you in the mood?"

His lips turned into a naughty smile and we began writing.

As we turned the boards around, Rob read mine and chuckled,

"Get shirtless."

"What d'you write?" I asked and read his aloud,

"Cook? Yeah..."

"Cook shirtless!" he exclaimed and added the word 'shirtless' onto his board, "There, cook shirtless and he gets laid for sure," he told Ellen.

"That's all it takes?" Ellen asked me.

"That's all it takes!" I confirmed.

"Well, yeah, he's hot and I like good food," Rob said nonchalantly.

"Is he a good cook?" Ellen asked.

"He's a very good cook," Rob replied. "He can pretty much do anything in the kitchen."

"Yeah, I can doanything in the kitchen." I smiled. "Any-thing," I added naughtily.

Rob laughed and Ellen picked up the naughty vibe.

"I don't think we've ever seen you shirtless."

I let out a small laugh,

"Oh, I'm sure there are a couple of pictures showing both of us shirtless on a beach somewhere."

"Are there?"

The audience confirmed that there weren't any. There were some, I knew, but I played along.

"Gotta leave them wondering."

"I'm just saying, we've seen Robbie shirtless a countless number of times, so...," she raised her eyebrows.

"So?" I repeated.

"He won't take his shirt off that easily, Ellen!" Rob laughed.

She pulled a fifty banknote out of her pocket and smiled,

"I'll give you fifty bucks if you take you shirt off!"

I looked at Rob briefly and then back at Ellen.

"Oh ok!" I shrugged nonchalantly and stood up to take my tee off.

The audience cheered, laughed and clapped. I dropped my tee-shirt on the floor and took the note from her hand as she handed it to me.

"I wouldn't mind having this in my kitchen!" Ellen said to Rob, checking me out.

"Hey, I'm not complaining!" Rob responded.

"This is nice," Ellen said to the audience, "Don't you think they should play all of their concerts shirtless from now on."

"Nah, the guitar strap, like, hurts my skin!" I said, then I shoved the note into my jeans pocket and said to Rob as I sat back down, "easiest fifty bucks I've ever made."

Rob stared at me, amused,

"Who are you?" he asked playfully.

"And what did you do with my boyfriend?" I finished his sentence.

He raised his eyebrows at me.

"Boyfriend?" he asked assertively. "Boyfriend?" he repeated.

I kept a straight face and stared into his eyes,

"Yeah, 'cos I'm your husband now!"

His lips formed a small smile,

"Nice save," he said and I waited for him to look back at Ellen.

She had that cheeky smile on her face and I just grimaced, which made her smile more.

Rob picked my tee-shirt up and placed it over my chest,

"Put this back on," he said jokingly as he pretended to hide my torso with it.

I did and he picked another card.

"Jeez, it's getting hot in here!" he said sexily and read the question.

"What is my favorite time to have sex?" he asked.

I nodded,

"Yeah, I think I would've used my veto on this one," I laughed, pulling my tee shirt over my stomach.

He raised his brows at me and pretended to start writing to see whether or not I wanted to answer.

"Well, actually," I said, snapping my fingers, "I know whatmy favorite time to have sex is," I said, "cause it's yourleast favorite time to have sex."

Rob frowned and placed his hand over his chest,

"I have a least favorite time to have sex?" he asked dubiously.

I nodded, chuckling.

He thought about it.

"Ohhh... yeah ok, I'm giving it a go," he said and began writing.

"So, apparently," Ellen said to the camera, "we're changing the question to what is Robbie'sleast favorite time to have sex."

We laughed and turned our boards around. We had both written,

"Middle of the night."

"Yeah, when I'm already sleeping," Rob said.

"C'mon, it's a nice way to be woken up!" I exclaimed.

"Yeah, it's a great way to be woken up, when it's like... at least 9am, 'cause you know when is a good time to have sex... any other time of the day, literally, any other time!"

"Slut," I joked.

"Ellen's having fun right now," he said as he looked at her smiling.

We laughed and she smiled wickedly before saying,

"Only two more left."

Rob picked the last of my cards and read,

"When did I know I was gay?"

I had to think about it for a second.

"You know what," I told Rob, "I don't think I can answer that for you. I can definitely answer that for myself though."

"Yeah," he shook his head softly, "me neither. There's really no specific moment. I mean, I remember having so many boy crushes growing up, but I can't say - this is when I knew!"

I nodded.

"Yeah, I understand that," Ellen said, then looked at me.

"Yeah. It was different for me. I think I knew that I was gay when I realised I'd fallen in love with you," I said, looking at Rob, "'Cause I was happy being with girls, and having a girlfriend." I explained to Ellen, "But then, when we got together - it felt ... different, the connection was different and when I kind of allowed myself to acknowledge my feelings then, something just clicked in my head, and . . . I knew."

Rob gave me a sweet smile.

"Alright, the last one," he said as he picked the last remaining card.

"How many kids do I want?" he asked, chuckling.

"Have we had this conversation?" I asked under my breath.

In fact, the subject would sometimes come up when we were chatting with friends.

I wrote "one or two" and Rob had written "one."

"Just one?" Ellen asked.

"That's more than you want," Rob told Ellen jokingly.

"I love kids," she responded. "I absolutely love kids, I think kids are our future, other people's kids!"

We laughed.

"So, you'd like to have kids?" she asked.

"Maybe, yeah," I answered, "I know some artists do it, but if I ever have a kid, I want to be totally available, and right now our career takes so much space that I can't imagine how a child could even fit into our lives."

"Yeah, we'll see when the other three have kids, how that will work," Rob added.

"You imagine Jordan having kids anytime soon?" I asked Rob, raising an eyebrow.

He laughed,

"Yeah, that's unlikely. But I do find the idea of having a child intriguing. Because, I mean, you know, that overwhelming feeling of love that you get when you look at the person that you truly love," he said and looked at me lovingly, "I think that's a feeling that must be multiplied -- or at least just as strong - when you have a child. I think it's something that ought to be experienced."

"Well, believe me when I say this, your child will be very lucky to have you two as parents," Ellen concluded, thanked us for playing along and began presenting our album for a bit of promotion before we played on the set.

"So, are you gonna play'Adventure Of A Lifetime' acoustically for us now?"

"Yep, we sure are," I smiled because I was going to use Dolly, my new Dobro Resophonic.

"Wonderful!"

—------

"The stage looks so good from here!" I said to Rob a few hours later, looking up at the stage our team of roadies had finished setting up.

We were sitting on the C-stage, at the end of the long runway - what the techs called the B-stage - looking back towards the main one, trying to imagine how it would feel to be here in a few hours. The C-stage gave us the illusion of being out amongst the audience and we'd come to love it.

We were very involved in all the creative decisions so a lot of options were constantly left open. Consequently, the stage was regularly evolving. Thankfully, the staging company we worked with was flexible and responded well under pressure, although they did tell us to bugger off a few times when we suggested what seemed to us very reasonable ideas but was a "no way in hell, that's not possible," to them.

I took a picture, which I shared on Instagram saying,"Our stage has never looked so good. Back at the Rose Bowl, let's do this Los Angeles"

"We have an hour to kill, don't we?" Rob whispered into my ear, "I bet the stage looks even better from the press boxes!"

"Yeah, I'm sure it does," I said, faking being jaded.

"Well, wouldn't you like to find out?''

"I'm alright," I answered with a shrug.

"C'mon,'' he teased, smiling, "I already have a boner!''

I giggled,

"You've got some weird sexual fantasies."

He smiled slyly,

"I've got weird sexual fantasies???!"

I simply grinned.

"We got nothing better to do. Let's do something exciting!"

"Babe, we can have sex wherever you want, just not up there!"

He gazed at me with seductive eyes, and I knew that, despite being ambivalent, there was horniness in mine.

"Why not up there? You'd rather go in the dressing room and stick to what you know?" he teased me playfully.

"Yeah," I responded, nodding my head, "Must be why I stuck with you for so long," I joked.

"Oh, really?" he asked in a mock-serious tone, "You mean, it's not because I'm so hot and fun and you love me so much?"

I shrugged playfully.

"Okay, sexy," he huffed, pretending to give up "fair enough."

He was quiet for a short moment,

"Well... I'm gonna go up there anyway," he said and looked up, "just to enjoy the view." he slowly stood up, not forgetting to readjust his boner for me to see.

"Qui m'aime me suive!" he announced in French.

"Oh, for crying out loud!" I exclaimed, I watched him walk up the runway for a moment and then finally stood up to follow him.

He smiled as I caught up with him.

"If anybody sees us..."

''Nobody's gonna see us."

"Yeah, well, you say that now..."

"Come on, this way," he gestured as he moved his hand onto my upper back.

We quickly went past a couple of roadies that were working on the left side of the stage,

"Wait, where you going?" one of them asked.

It was John, a fifty-five-year-old roadie who had been working with us for a long time and who, we knew, did his job meticulously.

"Backstage," Rob answered and we walked faster, almost running, before he could ask us to do whatever it was that he obviously wanted us to do.

"Can you spare some time for me?" John called and we had no choice but to turn around and talk to him.

"Um, sure," Rob answered reluctantly and I laughed to myself, knowing he was hard and that it was the last thing he wanted to do.

From then on, he began a lesson about our instruments, microphones, screens, apps that we knew would go on and on and on.

"Give me your phone...," he said into my ear because he knew I had it with me.

"Why?"

"Cuz I'm trying to get us laid."

He then pretended to receive a phone call and walked away from us so we couldn't hear distinctly what he was saying. John was nice but he seemed to feel the compulsive need to repeat himself to make sure everything would go as planned. I already knew everything he was telling me and I wasn't sure why he was saying all of this to me again. It wasn't as if the stage was anything different at the Bowl. I was getting bored and was now actually really looking forward to fooling around with Rob. After a good five minutes Rob came back and said that Tom needed to see us, which allowed me to slip away from the lesson.

"Fancy a jam before soundcheck?" John asked me.

"Yeah, yeah, count me in! I'll be right back, alright," I told him.

As Rob led the way, I asked, "how are we supposed to get the press boxes without being seen, are they even open?"

He grinned. "I said I wanted to do something exciting, I didn't say I wanted to do something spontanous. I've already made sure we could get inside."

—--

"Woah," I exclaimed looking through the bank of sliding windows that ran the length of the press box, "the windows are so clean."

"I know. It's almost as if there weren't any, exciting," he said sexily, wrapping his arms around me and crushing his lips against my cheek. I turned around to kiss him, his lips were warm and full, and mine were quickly responsive.

"Have I ever told you how fucking hot you are?" he whispered intensely.

"You've mentioned it," I replied through our kisses.

"Have I ever told you how hard you make me?"

I nodded, my teeth playing with his bottom lip.

"Rob," I began protesting again but I wasn't quite sure why anymore, maybe to make the moment sexier, "I really don't think it's a good idea to fool around here," I said quietly, although I was struggling to come up with a reason why we couldn't.

"Why not?" he asked, his tongue darting out then lightly biting my lips, "I'm sure the ghosts won't mind missing this show," he joked.

Indeed, despite feeling super inspired in our hotel room, I also felt super horny, but then again, writing music would always get me a bit worked up.

"They can watch tomorrow," he murmured and started kissing me hard again, his hands sliding up my sides.

He was wearing a red, short-sleeved shirt that had the logo of the band on the front, and my hands quickly moved under it, feeling the hard mounds of his abdomen.

"You mean, they can watch tonight..." I said, wiggling my brows.

"Are you not letting me sleep again tonight?" he jokingly complained.

I giggled,

"I can't help it, it's the room. I can't believe you don't feel it."

"Well, I don't."

I shrugged,

"You're not connected to your spiritual side," I placed a quick kiss over his lips then added inquisitively, "are you trying to tire me out?"

He laughed,

"Yeah, I'm not sure I want to get fucked in front of a ghost again. That's too creepy."

I furrowed my eyebrows,

"But fooling around in here is fine?

He nodded positively.

I chuckled,

"Someone's gonna know we're in here," I said, sounding like I knew I was losing the battle, "I don't want to get kicked out of the Rose Bowl, imagine the headline!" I joked.

"What's life without a little bit of risk?" he laughed. "Now whip it out."

I opened my mouth to protest, but then stopped and gave a slight shrug. My hands moved slowly toward my waist, my eyes locked on his. I unbuckled the belt I was wearing and slowly began unbuttoning my tight, button-fly jeans. With that accomplished, I hooked my thumbs inside my boxer-briefs and began to slide them, along with my jeans, down my thighs, my eyes never leaving his, my lips fixed in a sly grin. He looked down as my cock made its appearance. I wasn't hard, but the long shaft was already plumped and ready for action.

"I'm guessing you're a little more excited than you want to let on," he said with a grin.

"Me?" I said innocently, "Come on, Rob. This isn't exactly something we haven't done before."

He gave me a little wink, and I found it hard to keep from giggling. I wanted this moment to be sexy and hot, but it was hard to act erotically with someone I knew so well. Trying to get myself more into character, I looked down at his boner and asked him if that was for me.

"Yeah," he replied with such a sly look I wished I could have snapped a picture, he was always better at this than I was, "yeah, it's for you," he said and wrapped his hand around my shaft.

"What do you want me to do with this?" he asked, as if he didn't know.

I stared intensely into his eyes,

"I want you to suck it."

He looked at me, slightly shocked to see that I wasn't smiling. His cool green eyes turned warm and I could tell he liked the fact that it was getting hot,

"Ok. "

He got down on his knees and lightly pressed his face into the crease where my pelvis met my leg. He kissed my soft skin, feeling my smooth cock against his cheek as he moved lower, his tongue reaching out to lap at my sack. He moved back and forth between my shaved balls, his lips and tongue causing my cock to rise to attention

Then he began licking at the base of my cock, his tongue running up the sides before he made his way up and over it. Rob gasped a bit as he took the head into his mouth, his tongue running around the ridge that separated it from the shaft. My hands began to move through his hair and as he started taking me deeper and deeper, I turned my head around to watch the stage, I was now very turned on by where we were. When I looked back down at him, he was working my cock at a faster pace. God, he drove me crazy. I could have had a million lovers and no one would have turned me on this much. Of that I was positive.

He moved back and forth on my cock quickly, until my short pubes tickled his nose and he began deep-throating me. His technique was, as usual, perfect. He applied a lot of suction and kept my cock buried into his mouth, barely moving back up before going back down. If he was trying the suck the life out of me, he was doing a pretty great job. The pressure of his tongue against my shaft felt amazing and waves of pleasure kept rolling through my body.

"Oh man!" I sighed, "This feels so good. Ohhh."

For some reason, my moaning made him slid his mouth off of my shaft and he raised himself back to a standing position.

"Did I say you could stop?" I asked and he suddenly looked very innocent.

"No," he said, trying to catch his breath, "but I don't want you to cum."

"Oh no?"

"Well, I want you to cum, but not 'til after I've fucked you."

"Wha...?", I looked at him, surprised, "But we can't," I said, becoming a bit apprehensive again.