Watching The Detectives Ch. 07

--- CHAPTER SEVEN - HALF OF EVERYTHING ---

Late October 1969

Kat had a severe case of the blues. Her life had taken a hard turn. She'd lost control. Her plan to reclaim her old position at Kramer & Stein was thwarted by Abe Stein denying her request to return. After two fruitless job interviews, her marriage exit strategy had stalled. Petey was not adjusting to life as an apartment dog. Each week with Glo was more stressful than the last. The only good news was that Ray had stopped calling.

On a Friday evening, Glo offered to take Kat out for dinner and drinks to cheer her up. They sat in Cafe Modeno, their favorite Italian joint, a restaurant Raymond once created a jealous husband scene in eighteen months ago. The girls looked at menus. The waitress dropped off glasses of water.

Glo held up two fingers. "We'll have two Peronis." The waitress smiled and walked away.

Kat took a sip of water. "I've been in the mood for pasta all week."

Looking over Kat's shoulder, Glo's eyes got wide. Ray approached their booth. When she looked up, Kat nearly jumped out of her seat. Ray held his hands up in surrender, then spoke softly.

"Please, Kat, I come in peace. I'm begging you for three minutes of your time... no more."

Kat's hands lightly tremored. She took a deep calming breath. Glo stared at her still bug-eyed. Ray waited patiently for her answer. Kat looked at Glo who shook her head... 'no'. Kat looked up at Ray. He didn't react. Kat looked back to Glo.

"Go sit at the bar," she said, "near the payphone. The first sign of trouble, call the police." Kat reached into her clutch. "Here's a quarter."

Glo smiled, finding the quarter gesture funny. She glared at Ray. He avoided eye contact, focusing on his wife.

"I promise you, there will be no trouble," Ray said calmly. "I will speak my mind and leave. You don't have to say a word. I promise."

Glo nodded and reluctantly left the table. Nearby patrons gawked sensing something dramatic was happening. Ray took Glo's seat very slowly. He was making an effort to be as non-threatening as possible, which itself was creepy.

Kat knew half the staff recognized them from the embarrassing scene he had caused not long ago. This was Ray's encore performance at Cafe Modeno. Kat looked at her watch. Ray took that as his cue. His tone was slow, calm, and deliberate.

"I am so sorry for what I've done, everything, especially striking you. I won't even try to explain, or make excuses. I did it and I hate myself for it. I'm sorry I didn't trust you and hired those men. It's my insecurity causing our problems. It's nothing you've done. I'm sorry I've been cold and distant. I need to work on that, to not bring my work problems home. I need to give more of my time to you."

Ray paused for a moment and reached for his throat. He gestured to Glo's glass of water. Kat slid her water across the table. He drank half the glass and took a long deep breath. When he exhaled he continued.

"I love you, Kat. I've been a shitty husband. I made you leave a career you love to start a family yet it seems we can't have a baby. Then, I was inflexible. I should have agreed to you going back to work. I was selfish. I enjoy having you at home. Coming home to you is the best part of my day. I have not shown that in a long time. I know you're bored and unhappy. I think that's why I thought you might look for excitement elsewhere even though I had no real reason to believe it."

Ray looked down at his hands folded on the table. Kat had never seen him this low, desperate, and vulnerable. He was the kind of man who appeared confident and in control of himself in all situations. Today, he appeared broken.

He sighed. "I found a doctor. That's what I've wanted to speak to you about - well, and to apologize. I don't blame you for staying away and not speaking to me but it has been frustrating. I've had six therapy sessions in two weeks. Now I'm going twice a week. It's been incredible. Doctor Pawlik is opening my brain. I'll continue to go for as long as it takes to beat my demons, insecurity, and jealousy. He's trying to determine the root cause. He thinks it's abandonment. When Mother divorced my dad she left me too. She never tried to be part of my life. She just moved away. That's what the doctor thinks. I have abandonment issues."

Ray wiped his brow with a napkin and took another sip of water. There was a long pause. Kat stared at him, emotionless, not revealing the discomfort she felt inside.

"Why did you change the locks at the house?"

"It was the only way I could think to make you call me."

"That's just as much my house as yours. You had no right to do that."

"I'm sorry." Ray lowered his head. "I was desperate."

When he looked up, Ray saw Glo at the bar, pointing at her naked wrist and mouthing, "Time's up, asshole."

"Kat, I'm serious, I really do love you. If you come home we should talk about you going back to work. Maybe we could take a vacation first, like a second honeymoon. That's entirely up to you, no pressure. I need a second chance. I promise I won't call or come to the apartment. I'll wait while you think this over. Please come home. I'm sorry, and I miss you."

Ray stood up. "I'll leave you a key in the usual place." Without saying goodbye he walked out, tall and dignified, the way Kat remembered him when they first met. Glo returned to her seat.

"What in holy hell was that?"

"Let's order dinner and I'll tell you what he said." Kat picked up her menu. "Let's get shots too. I'm getting drunk tonight."

Kat told Glo everything Ray said and her thoughts on it. That evening, Gloria Marsland set a new Guinness World Record for most eye-rolls in one hour. The girls left tipsy, stopped for more booze on the way home, and got sloppy drunk at the apartment.

The following morning, Kat had a crushing hangover. Very early before dawn, she discovered Petey had left a brown moist package on the bathroom floor. Glo, also with a blinding hangover walked in and stepped in it... barefoot. Kat got down and cleaned the mess and nearly threw up from the smell. She almost passed out trying to stand up. Then, she sat on the edge of the bathtub, cleaning her friend's shitty foot, crying.

"What the hell has happened to my life? I have nothing."

"You have me," Glo reminded her. "Don't forget that." Just talking made her head hurt.

"I know, and I love you, but I'm afraid this is going to kill our friendship. It's fun for a week but don't tell me it's fun now."

"It's been hard I admit. but I'll never abandon you. We could look for a bigger place."

"Oh, my god. I'm so sick. I need to go back to bed." Kat took a deep breath. "That's sweet of you but I must deal with my screwed-up life. I need to get back to work so I can leave him."

"I know. You haven't been yourself since you quit. You were so much happier then." Glo gagged and put her hand to her mouth. "I just swallowed a little vomit."

Kat waved her hand. "You have the breath of the living dead."

Glo got up, brushed her teeth, and drank water directly from the bathroom faucet. "I have to sleep this off. I'm going back to bed."

"I'm so sorry, Glo." Kat whimpered as they climbed back in bed.

******

A week after Raymond's plea, Kat was considering moving back home. The news didn't sit well with her mother. Mom sat quietly at first, allowing her daughter to get her words out. When Kat finished Mom went off on one of her patented screeds about Kat's no-good husband, and how she was making a terrible mistake.

"Every woman I've known who stays with a batterer is abused again, and I've known more battered women than I care to admit."

"Is that why they go to church? You being angry makes me not want to talk to you about this," said Kat. "Is that what you want?"

"I'm not angry with you, I'm disappointed," Mam said as she placed two bowls of beef stew on the table.

"I can't recall the last time you weren't disappointed in me." Kat picked up her spoon. "It may have been high school when I was awarded the scholarship to Lehigh."

"I'm most disappointed that you won't stay with me. I would love to help and Petey would be fine here. I have a nice backyard."

"Mom. I'm never moving back home. There's a point in life when that's no longer an option."

"Coming home is always an option, sweetie. That's why they call it home."

Mom's trashy tabloid, The Weekly Mail, lay open on the table, turned to page three where a small headline caught Kat's eye; Local Businessman Arrested for Battery.

Kat realized it was a weeks-old edition. "Mom, why is this lying around? It's old news. You planted it here hoping I'd see it."

Mom averted her eyes and smiled. "I'm saving it for my scrapbook."

"Are you seriously making light of this?"

"You always say it's better to laugh than cry. At least Bob Pitka didn't put you on the front page like he used to."

"I'm surprised he didn't run an old photo." Kat pushed the paper toward Mom. "Get this away from me."

"If you're here for my advice I have some. If you want it."

Kat stared into her stew. "Sure."

"You should go to the bank and withdraw as much cash as you need to set yourself up. Then file those divorce papers!"

Kat didn't reply. She picked at her lunch. After a long silence, Mom continued.

"You're married. Half that money is yours. When you bought the house you transferred all your money into the joint account. You had a nice nest egg for a single girl. Then you quit your job to start a family. Half that house is yours. Half of everything is yours."

Kat nodded. She didn't want to make money an issue but there was no avoiding it. Money was the only reason she couldn't move on with her life.

******

That evening, Gloria invited a new male friend over to meet Kat. David worked at the courthouse with Glo. He'd been flirting with her for weeks. After a couple of lunch dates and an after-work happy hour, they were becoming an item. David was tall, handsome, and seemed nice. Kat was happy for Glo, but this new relationship only made Kat's discomfort with their living arrangements worse. The following morning, she told Glo she was moving out.

"Where will you go?"

"Tomorrow morning I'm going to the bank. I'll take enough cash to get me set up in my own place. I think I found an apartment near campus."

"Pitt or Duquesne?"

"Duquesne, on Dinwiddie Street."

"You don't have to leave," said Glo. "I want you to stay."

"We're sharing your bed. How can you have a relationship with me in your bed?"

"I can go to his place."

"No," said Kat. "It's settled. I'm moving out."

The following morning, Kat stared at the bank teller in silence, in mild shock, but showing no emotion. The teller had just informed her that the joint checking account she and Raymond had opened when they got married had a balance of twenty-five dollars, the minimum required to keep it open.

"Can you please check our savings account?" Kat reached into her purse. "Here's the account number."

A few moments later, the teller looked up. "It's the same ma'am, twenty-five dollars."

"What did my husband do with our money?"

"I can't answer that. If there's a problem my manager can assist you."

"Yes, please. I'd like to speak with the manager."

The manager explained that Raymond transferred the funds from their checking and savings to his business accounts. Kat's mind was swimming in a pool of confusion.

'What the hell am I going to do now?'

From the bank, Kat drove straight to Landry Architectural Design.

'If I'm going to confront him at least there'll be witnesses.'

When she arrived, Kat walked past his receptionist with a fake smile and straight into Raymond's office where he was meeting with two architects.

"You transferred all of our money to your business accounts! You had no right to do that!"

Ray's associates jerked their heads around to see Kat standing behind them. Ray didn't react to her intrusion. He calmly addressed his employees.

"We can continue this after lunch."

The men got up and uncomfortably walked around Kat, not a word spoken.

"You have no right to half that money, Raymond. It's mine. Who the hell do you think you are?"

"Sit down Kat. I'll explain. I can return that money this afternoon... after we talk."

Kat didn't sit. "You did this to force me to see you, like replacing the locks?"

"Yes. I did. Please sit. I promise you I'll return the money. I just want to talk for a few minutes like I did last week."

Ray's calm demeanor disarmed Kat. She took a seat across from her estranged husband.

"I'm sorry I upset you," he said. "I didn't know how else I could get you to come to me."

"By manipulating me? First the house locks and now this?"

"I transferred the money the same day the locks were changed... before we last spoke. I should have returned it after we talked. Kat, I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to instigate a fight."

"I'm not coming home," Kat said coldly. "I don't trust you."

"I know. My therapist asked if you would be willing to come to one of my sessions so we could discuss my problems and the progress I've made in the past month. It's quite remarkable."

Kat didn't answer. She sat rigid, motionless, hands on her lap, staring at Raymond with no emotion. After a moment, she leaned back in her chair.

"When's your next appointment?"

"This afternoon. I go every Monday and Thursday. Does this mean you'll go?"

"I'll meet this guy. I'm curious what he has to say."

******

Glo was apoplectic watching Kat pack her things. "Are you fucking crazy? He beat you, Kat. How can you go back to that wife beating misanthrope?"

"It's only temporary until I find a job and can support myself."

"What about taking half of the money?"

"I will. When it's time to leave. You should've seen him at his therapist's office, meek as a lamb. He cried. I'd never seen Ray cry before."

"You don't believe that bullshit act do you? I've seen wife beaters cry before. They're very good at the manipulation game."

"I don't know, Glo. I've seen husbands have a come-to-Jesus moment when their wives left them. I feel I have the upper hand. He'll be on his best behavior while I bide my time. He knows I'm looking for a job but not what my plans are once I have one."

"Your Mom is going to lose her mind when she finds out."

"I called her. She knows."

"What did she say?"

"She lost her mind," Kat smirked. "Please trust me. It's only temporary. I have this under control."

.

.

---- UPPER HAND ----

It didn't take long for Kat to realize yes, she had the upper hand, but it didn't make life at home as easy as she had expected. For ten days Ray was on his best behavior. That turned out to be less desirable than she could've imagined. Kat stood in the doorway between the kitchen and dining room, the exact spot where Raymond had knocked her out cold.

"No Ray, permission is not the right word." Kat was frustrated her husband still didn't get it. "I don't need your permission. I'm going to the Women's Conference because I want to go. I never asked you if I could go."

Ray was also frustrated. He thought he was being a good guy. "I'm just saying I'm okay with you going. It's not a problem."

"You just said I have your permission, that's a whole different meaning than not a problem. It implies that I need you to grant me permission. I'm telling you I don't need it."

"Okay, okay. I'm sorry I chose the wrong words. I want you to go because it means a lot to you."

"That's not, argh!" She threw her hands up. "Never mind. You should go hit some golf balls."

"It's too cold for golf," he said. "I was thinking we'd spend the day together. Maybe go see Butch Cassidy and The Sundance Kid. It's at The Majestic. It's supposed to be great. You love Redford."

"Honestly, I want to stay in. I'm working on my speech for the conference. Then I have to cook dinner. Go to the club and shoot some pool... or something."

"You can come with me. We haven't played billiards in..."

"I have to prepare dinner."

"I'll take you out to dinner. There's a new restaurant in The Strip, where the lumber yard was. They've completely remodeled the old warehouse. I want to see what they did."

"I bought those thick center-cut pork chops you like. I'm cooking dinner."

Raymond skulked away, dejected his wife was not warm to his invitations. He was genuinely trying. There's such a thing as trying too hard, and Ray discovered it. He was smothering the first week Kat was home. She had to tell him to back off. He did, a little, but hours later was back at it, trying too hard. She appreciated his effort. It was just too much and it seemed phony. Even in courtship, he wasn't this desperate. Kat's instinct told her it wasn't real and wouldn't last. No man could maintain this level of cheerful, loving, commitment over the long term. It's just not in his DNA. Ray was even nice to Petey, who was far more suspicious than Kat, growling when Ray tried to pet him.

It was as if Ray had misplaced his male dignity. He deferred to his wife on all matters. Previously, Ray made a point of being the man of the house, calling the shots. He loathed running errands with his wife, especially shopping. He looked down on Kat's favorite diners. Now, he tagged along for errands and lunch. Kat wanted her husband who didn't give a damn back. When Ray proudly declared that she had his permission to attend the Women's Conference ay Lehigh, Kat nearly lost her temper. She wanted him to go to the country club so she could breathe freely for two hours.

'Having the upper hand isn't what I thought it would be.'

Kat had her third and fourth job interviews in the days leading up to the conference. In both cases, she was overqualified for the underpaying positions.

As she packed for her two-day trip, Kat was grateful Ray was at work. She would avoid the sappy goodbye and fake kisses. The last thing she needed from Ray was affection. She had already rebuffed two sexual advances since her return, shocked that he could even consider she was ready for that. It would only be two nights in Bethlehem, PA, a steel town, but it felt like two weeks in Hawaii. The trip arrived as her last nerve was fragile and about to pop.

.

.

--- BETHLEHEM --

The two hundred ninety miles to eastern Pennsylvania was therapeutic. Kat listened to her small collection of 8-track tapes, loudly, driving 85 MPH on the interstate, thinking about her future. She butt-danced in her seat to Blood, Sweat & Tears, and The Guess Who. Lucretia Mac Evil was one of her favorite songs.

The first event at Lehigh University was a coffee and tea meet and greet at Lindeman Library. She was almost shocked when her weekend getaway was invaded, but not entirely. After the coffee event, as Kat left the library, she noticed a blue Chevy Impala pulling a U-turn at the dead end on Library Road.

'No. It can't be.' Kat stopped on the sidewalk. The Impala braked. 'Oh my God. It's Art Casey. Son-of-a-bitch.'

Like an old western showdown, Casey sat forty yards away looking over his steering wheel at Kat while she glared back at him in her sky-blue skirt with a matching jacket over a pale yellow blouse.

She shook her head in disbelief. The car slowly rolled towards her.

'I'm gonna make this weird.'

Kat stepped into the road as he approached. The pain on Art's face was clear as she blocked his exit. He stopped. She maintained eye contact, waiting several seconds to let him know who was in charge. Then Kat walked to his door twirling a finger to signal Art to roll down his window.

"This is so dumb," she said. "Didn't they teach you in cop school to never get stuck with no way out?"

"You're not that dangerous," said Casey. "I think I'll be okay."

Casey looked her up and down, from the light blue heels to her glossy lips up to her blonde hair pulled up in the business bun."