Western Skies Ch. 05: Snowfall

Wordlessly, I shrugged off my own jacket and obliged, cutting open a couple bales and distributing it between the stalls. After tossing the last few flakes into Willy's feeder, I turned around to see Luke leaning against the doorway of the stall, arms crossed. His familiar grin had the same effect on my now as it did the first day I met him - Luke's sculpted lips were spread into a mocking smirk, the corners upturned. Above, his cheeks were red from the combination of cold and the sudden return to the warm barn, even as his intense eyes bore holes into me.

"What?" I muttered, blushing but holding his gaze.

Luke's smile grew wider and his cheeks crinkled, fire flashing in his now narrowed eyes. "Just enjoying the show. Until now, I've never had a boyfriend to watch throw hay." He turned his back to me, gathering up half the grain buckets and carrying them over to the horses. I grabbed the remaining pails and trailed behind, my cock beginning to grow hard as I watched Luke's firm ass flex under his slim jeans.

"Boyfriend?" I inquired, after a moment. Of course we were together--and had been for months now--but it was the first time one of us had used the word. When I said it, the word rolled off my tongue like it was foreign and hard to pronounce; there was a sense of formality about it, commitment...saying it was almost like uttering a solemn oath.

Luke faced me again, rolling his eyes and making an exasperated sound. I couldn't help but chuckle; if I had to deal with an overly-dramatic Luke, I much preferred the playful version over the insecure one.

But, like clockwork, he misinterpreted my laugh and scowled, slamming the last horse's stall door closed with unwarranted venom. The mare balked slightly, shying away and causing Luke to catch himself and sigh.

"Luke, no," I began reproachfully. "You're right. It's just strange to hear, I guess. And say." I walked over and placed my hands on either side of his waist, grinning. "You're my boyfriend, fucker. God help you with that."

"Glad that's settled, then" he said quietly, perking back up and giving me a side-eyed glance loaded with anticipation. My dick was obviously swollen, pointed painfully down my leg under the revealing hug of my jeans. Luke was still clearly struggling with some deep emotion, considering he didn't seem to react like normal to the feeling of my manhood against him. A growing suspicion and sense of alarm filled me. I wasn't ready for what I thought he might say next.


He took a half-step back and placed his hands on my shoulders. "Kaden." Luke spoke my name softly, deeply...and my suspicion of what was coming turned into certainty. Despite the months that had past and how our feelings for each other had strengthened, there seemed to be something too final about declaring our commitment in the one word upon which so much of human experience lives and dies.

Did I love Luke? Without a single fucking doubt. But the idea of saying it out loud, when so much of the future was still unwritten and shrouded beneath the fog of uncertainty...I couldn't handle it. Not now. Maybe not ever; who could know. So I stopped him.

Closing the gap Luke had put between us, I wrapped my arms tightly around his ass and caressed the space between his thighs, moving my hands from the cold outside of his legs to the warmth between them. Tilting my head up, I pressed my mouth to his, stealing the fateful word from his mouth before it could be spoken. Luke stood frozen amidst my embrace, wide-eyed, but it took barely a moment before his eyelids drooped and his breathing slowed to match mine. Satisfied, I closed my eyes as well while our wind-chapped lips twisted together in increasingly passionate contortions.

After I minute, I started to pull back, intending to finish the chores we'd started. Before I realized what was happening, I felt Luke's hands under my knit shirt, his fingers pressing firmly into my skin and blocking my escape. Goosebumps instantly marched down my back and a shiver ran up my spine. His hands crept to my waistline as he broke our kiss. My eyes fluttered open long enough to see a single, intense blue-gray eye peering out at me between strands of honey-colored hair. There was a slight upward tilt to his perfect lips, and I knew what was going to happen next.

Luke's mouth found my neck, nibbling and sucking its way down to my collarbone. My senses went into overdrive. I could feel the pressure of blood pouring into my cock, the tingly heat of arousal on my skin, and the familiar brain fog blowing into the crevices of my mind. I must've gasped slightly, because through my mental haze I heard Luke chuckle, before his hands deftly began to pry at my belt buckle.

In one fluid motion, he yanked down on my jeans and long underwear while pushing me into the wall of the horse stall. Luke shoved up my shirt and lowered his head to my stomach, doing his best to nibble on the skin that shrouded my abs. One of his hands held up my shirt while the other began to encircle my ass, matching gentle squeezes to the rhythm of his oral performance. My pulsating cock was beginning to leak, and quivered when Luke's neck brushed up against it. As Luke's mouth worked slowly south along my body, the already intense pressure in my loins seemed to increase exponentially. By the time his mouth kissed the top of my trimmed pubes I thought I was going to die.

"Fucking do it already," I half-hissed, half-gasped.

My comment earned me a hard squeeze on the ass and the lifting of his head. "Do what?" he whispered, feigning surprise. I looked down, staring straight into Luke's twinkling eyes.

"Asshole," I mumbled. I was in no fit state to trade quips; he'd made sure of that. Luke snorted and took my manhood into his warm mouth without warning or hesitation, deepthroating me in one wonderful, fluid motion.

"Jesus fuck," I whined over the small choking noises coming from Luke, becoming a slave to nothing but the feeling of his mouth around me. It took all of twenty seconds before I was fighting the urge to cum, like it was our first time all over again. "Luke," I gasped, "Slow down, I'm gonna--"

The sound of a barn door creaking open tore me from the stupor I'd fallen into. Over the top of the stall door I saw a flash of dirty-blonde hair and narrowed gray eyes. Luke's mouth flew from my rapidly softening cock, leaving it to hang wet and limp as he awkwardly crouched, hidden from view of the barn door.

"Hey, Merry Christmas!" said Nora, grinning straight at me with a warmth I'd grown to appreciate. "Where's Luke?"

There was no way she could see Luke or the lower half of my body over the stall door, but I felt like my flushed cheeks and guilty expression gave it all away. "He's around here somewhere," I muttered, too shaken to come up with a better lie as I surreptitiously tried to pull my jeans up from where they rested on my thighs. Nora's expression grew amused, and I saw the familiar sparks of Luke's eyes echoing in hers as they bored into me.

She smiled wider and broke her gaze off to something beyond my shoulder. "Kaden, the horse--"

A muffled crashing noise off to my right made me jump. I turned my head so fast my neck popped and the feeling of alarm rose within my chest, only to be replaced by mirth. Willy had apparently decided to take a break from his flake of hay to come heckle Luke where he crouched on the ground, nuzzling at his pockets for treats and knocking him off balance.

Luke stood slowly, rubbing his shoulder where it had slammed into the stall wall. "Hey, Nora," he mumbled, looking bashful, his cheeks red as burning coals.

Nora just rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Idiots. Get a room. Preferably one that isn't the barn, weirdos." She raised her eyebrows, taking in our guilty expressions as we conspicuously avoided any eye contact with her. I chanced a look back at her face, noticing equal parts amusement and exasperation lining her features.

"Seriously, though," she added in a serious tone, "what if it was Mom or Dad who came in here, not just me coming to check on the horses? You know how they'd--"

"I got it, you don't need to remind me," Luke snapped, interrupting her with a scowl. "I'll do better, okay?"

Nora gave him a reproachful look and softened her tone. "Look, it's 'cause I know how things would be. Do you want to enjoy what you have with Kaden or deal with the shitstorm if they find out?"

Luke sighed. He reflexively ran a hand through his hair and gave me a sideways glance, a frown tugging at the corners of his lips in place of the smirk I was so used to. A pang of mingled anxiety and tenderness rippled through me.

"I know, Nora," Luke said, sounding dejected. "Dad'll come around at some point."

Nora emitted a snort. "Right. Remember what happened when we had to drive through Helena during the pride parade last year?"

Luke scowled. "Whatever. I don't know. Just leave it be, will you? C'mon, 'Kade."

I started to follow Luke through the stall door and towards the end of the barn, but stopped to hug Nora. "I'm sorry," I muttered, unsure what else to say.

Nora graced me with a wan smile. "It's for your own good. Both of you. It's not forever, it'd be different if you were both off in college and it wasn't an election year for Dad..." Her voice trailed off as she looked towards the barn door where Luke had just walked out.

"I know," I agreed. "It's just all the sneaking around. At first it was kind of exciting, but now it's just a constant source of stress. I mean, Luke still gets all mixed up about us sometimes. He's probably more anxious than I am, by far..."

"There's just a lot you guys are up against," Nora replied. "My dad's political career, not to mention his personal beliefs. Oh, and the fact you're in Montana. If you guys work out, you won't have to keep it a secret forever. But if it comes out now, there's no way you guys could keep it going."

I raised my eyebrows. "Graduation is still over four months out, and the election isn't until next November. That's a long time for a secret like this."

Nora crossed her arms. "If you want to keep Luke, you'll both have to keep it a secret. Some things are worth making sacrifices for. You just have to decide, is it worth it?"

And with that, Nora turned and left me standing alone in the barn with the horses, pensive. I felt a gentle pressure on my shoulder and started, before realizing it was just Willy, who'd arced his neck over the stall door to nuzzle me. My hand found his muzzle and absentmindedly began to scratch under his jaw, while my brain kept trying to reconcile my feelings for Luke with the blunt reality Nora had so kindly laid out before us.

***

By the time I got back to the house, everyone else had awakened and begun to open presents while Luke's mom cooked breakfast, filling the house with a scent that made my empty stomach rumble. Mrs. Robinson's cooking was one of those things that I loved about Luke's family - despite their wealth, power, and connections, they were about as humble and down-to-earth as you could get. They were people who did things themselves, and for others, even if they could've sat on their asses and paid people to wait on them.

Ever since Luke and I had become inseparable, they'd welcomed me into their lives with such warmth and genuine kindness that I immediately felt as if I were among family. Maybe that was why I felt a pang of shame when I walked in to a round of buoyant "Merry Christmases"; the secret Luke and I shared, coupled with the recent admonishment from Nora, weighed heavily on me as I accepted a hug from Luke's mom and a handshake from his dad. Even chatting with Luke's older brother, Cody--a senior in college who was home for the holidays--made my stomach squirm a bit, probably due to his muddied resemblance to Luke and the same piercing blue eyes of his father.

It was an uncomfortable time opening gifts. Luke's smile seemed genuine enough when he opened his gift from me (a leather belt I'd made and tooled his initials into), but I knew him well enough to know the conversation from the barn was still troubling him.

Fortunately, the rest of the morning will filled with distractions: breakfast, shooting clay pigeons in the pasture beyond the house (which, apparently, was a Christmas tradition for the family), and finally "skijoring" with some of their local family friends. Somehow, these crazy northern rancher types decided it'd be fun to strap on skis and get pulled behind a horse. I'd been skiing with my family on vacation twice, once to Colorado when I was eight, and another time to nearby Big Sky a few years back, but this was something else entirely. It felt similar to getting towed behind a boat, but it was bumpy enough to send me flying on my first few tries. Given that this was my first-ever attempt ever to balance on thin wooden strips and get dragged by a thousand-pound animal, I was reasonably proud when I made it a full twenty seconds without falling on my third attempt. Far more entertaining was getting to ride the horse and pull Luke, especially when I threw in a sudden turn than sent him flying off into a snowdrift.

When the sun crested its apex in the sky and began to sink back towards the western horizon, Luke's parents called a wrap on the outdoor events and departed for Bozeman, where they were to pick up Luke's grandparents and bring them back for Christmas dinner.

Neighbors dispersed while Luke, Nora, and I made our way back into the house to shower. I had the additional work of dragging my duffel bag back downstairs and into my pickup...for me, this was only a one-day trip to the ranch. My dad and I were attending Christmas dinner at my grandparents' place near Three Forks, where my dad grew up. Then it'd be back home to Bozeman while Luke's family made a quick trip out of town to see his mother's side of their family. Then, finally, I'd get to join the Robinsons at Big Sky for a New Years's ski trip on the 31st. My head was spinning, trying to keep track of all the holiday travel plans; one thing was sure -- Luke's family was always on the go.

By the time I had showered and thrown my last possessions into my duffel bag, the house was silent. Nora's bedroom door was closed, and she'd mentioned taking a nap, so I snuck down the hallway to Luke's room and gave a gentle knock. There was silence. I knocked again and placed my ear against the door. Nothing. Puzzled, I walked back through the house, looking for him.

He wasn't in the kitchen, or the living room. Or the other living room. I was about to head towards the basement when I walked past his dad's office. Through the open double doors I could see him sitting in a chair in front of his dad's voluptuous, carved wooden desk. His back was to me, and it was obvious he was staring at the empty chair across from him, where his father would normally sit. A pang of sympathy lifted inside my chest and I frowned, knowing fully well it was Luke's internal identity crisis that was tormenting him right now.

"You have me pegged, the hat and shirt were perfect," I said quietly, interrupting his reverie with mention of the gifts he'd given to me earlier.

He stood up quickly, turning around and crossing his arms. His stormy eyes glistened for a moment as he stared at me without expression, before fixing me with a wan smile. "I could have you pegged, but typically that's your job," he replied in a snarky tone.

That made me roll my eyes. At least he still seemed to have his sense of humor. "You know, there is one thing I was hoping for today, but we didn't quite get to it earlier," I said, walking over to him and hooking my thumbs through his belt loops. I looked up into his face and gave Luke the warmest, most genuine smile I could muster. "We're in this together, pal, and no matter what, I want you."

"I know," he said, not unkindly, before adding, "Me too. Besides, it's not like we're doing anything wrong. Not at all."

"No, we're not," I agreed, firmly, before looking straight into his eyes, unblinking. "I'm here for you, babe, but you gotta stay strong for yourself too. I know you're terrified about what could happen to your...relationship...with your dad, but tormenting yourself with worry about the secret of who you really are...you're gonna implode at some point. And believe me, I don't want that to happen. I care too much about you to just be okay with how you're handling all this, on the inside."

Luke stared back at me. I guess I expected him to reply with a snide comment or push back, asking me what my master plan was to let him live as he was without changing his relationship with his family. To me, it seemed that in his mind he was already living somewhere beyond the present; it was as if he were seeking some sort of present absolution from the consequences of his father's anticipated future wrath.

Instead of speaking, though, Luke lowered his head and kissed me. He kissed me to say what words could not--would not--and instead let the feeling of his warm, wind-chapped lips against mine reassure me that he was okay. His arms went around my back, and they spoke to me too, telling me that he was still committed to us and didn't want to let go. And when his soft tongue crept out from between his lips and pressed into mine, even as his hands descended to caress the curve of my ass, I decided to stop worrying and simply exist, at least for the moment. My hands jumped from where they rested on his belt loops and found their way under the back of this shirt. I spread my fingers wide and pressed my left palm against the middle of Luke's hot, smooth back, while my right hand reach down and cupped the inside of his left thigh from behind.

Suddenly, Luke pulled back and stared at me once more. A manic glint had formed in the depth of his icy eyes, and the corners of his mouth slowly curved up in his trademark grin. "Here. Now."

Comprehension dawned on me. Adrenaline coursed through my veins and my skin suddenly felt hot. "Here? You don't want to go back to your room or something, Luke--"

In response, Luke gave me a haughty glare and began unbuckling his jeans. A moment later I was staring at his lean, bare ass, flexing above his toned thighs. I inhaled sharply as a tingling sensation radiated out from my groin and my cock began to harden. Luke's skin may have been paler than it was back in the fall when I met him, but his body was still as perfect as I could've dreamed of.

My eyes darted around the room, resting once more on his father's desk while trepidation held me back from pouncing on Luke.

"You sure about this...here?" I asked, sounding more timid than I would've liked.

"If you ask me that again I'm gonna break your face," Luke retorted, bending over the desk and spreading his legs shoulder-width apart

I laughed, fumbling with my own belt and zipper as quickly as I could. With a smirk, I lowered my voice and said, "Look at you babe, all pissed off and ready to go. It's hot."

He wasn't in the mood for anything but action, apparently. "You want to talk more or get on me?" he snarled over his shoulder, and I briefly caught a glimpse of his face. Luke's brow was furrowed and a distinctive wetness was edged around the corners of his eyes. It all made sense now; it meant something to him to do it in here, in his dad's office, and he was definitely struggling with it.

So, it was on me to help him work through it. I closed the short distance between us and pressed my body up against his. We shivered in tandem when our skin touched. I could feel Luke's heavy breathing where my chest made contact with his smooth back, and I pressed my iron rod gently between his cheeks, eliciting a deep sigh from him.

With a gentle kiss between his shoulder blades I sent a shiver down his spine. I snickered and gently licked from the back of his neck all the way down to the crook above his ass.