What We Say in the Dark Ch. 05

[Author's note: Cassie's husband is cheating on her with a younger woman, Lily. Instead of confronting him, Cassie has been blackmailed by his lover into doing what she she's told. As Lily gradually starts to take over her life, Cassie knows she needs to find a way to reassert control before it's too late.]

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HARD BODY

Cassie sipped a cup of herbal tea, staring at the screen. She was waiting for her client to join the call, running through a mental checklist of what she was going to cover in the session. Cassie looked at her notes again and was suddenly struck by the pointlessness of it all. Victoria was paying her well for these sessions, but in reality she was a common-or-garden bored wife. The fact that she had decided to come to Cassie for help deciding whether to satisfy her urges outside the marriage was an irony that wasn't lost on Cassie.

The screen came to life, resolving into a close-up of honey-brown skin, then black hair and finally a face. Victoria was in her early thirties, just a little younger than Cassie herself, the similarity in age fostering a bond between them. The last time they had spoken, Victoria was struggling with feelings about going out with her friends on a girls' night while her husband was out of town on business: a perfect opportunity to stray.

"Good morning," Cassie began.

The woman on the screen settled back into her seat. Cassie could now see that she was looking at a lounge room, with Victoria sitting on the sofa in a plain white t-shirt and jeans, dark hair over one shoulder. From the low angle, she was probably using a laptop positioned on the coffee table in front of her.

"Hi Cassie."

They made small talk for a few minutes, re-establishing a rapport, gleaning details of Victoria's life and current state of mind since their last catch-up a couple of weeks ago. Eventually, Cassie steered the conversation around to the girls' night and then let her client talk.

"We got dressed up, of course. A couple of my friends are single, so they were definitely on the prowl. There was a new rooftop bar opening and we managed to score invitations to the first night. We danced the night away."

"And how did it go, in terms of attracting attention?"

Victoria shrugged. "Mixed, to be honest. Karin was in a little red dress, and she's a natural blonde, so uh, well, she was definitely laying down the vibe. She was dancing with some property hotshot for most of the night. Me, not so much."

"Did you feel like you were holding back, or that you were being passed over?"

"A little of both, to be honest. She's very pretty. It's hard to make an impact standing next to her."

"And how did that make you feel?"

Victoria looked down at her hands, clasped in front of her, thinking for a moment. Cassie gave her time.

"I felt a little jealous, if I'm honest."

"Were you wearing your wedding ring?"

Victoria sat back, her expression becoming serious. "No," she said.

"Tell me, at the end of the night, did you go home alone?"

"Yes."

"And did you feel good or bad about that?"

"Bad," Victoria replied, but then leaned forward again, more animated, "But in the morning, it was different. I felt, um, I was relieved."

"I see you're wearing the ring at the moment. Have you taken it off since?"

Victoria shook her head. She appeared to be struggling with something.

"Cassie, am I fucked up?"

Cassie considered the question, taking her time. There was a standard response to her question; this was a standard scenario, but there was something nagging at her in the back of her mind, a little voice that had awoken the day she saw Lily make love to her husband.

"There are no neat answers to that question," she said, finally. "Other than let's find out."

The other woman's body language shifted immediately. Cassie felt a little knot in her stomach.

"I'd like to take you through a set of exercises designed to see whether your current state of mind is as a result of wanting to leave your current relationship, or simply wanting more from it."

She was watching Victoria carefully as she spoke, seeing that she had the other woman's rapt attention. This was what she was paying Cassie for: vindication for going outside her marriage. Cassie had other plans.

"First, tell me something. Do you go by Victoria or Vicki at home?"

"Uh, Victoria. I haven't been called Vicki since school."

"I want to try an exercise with you, but first we have to set some boundaries so to start, I'm going to call you Vicki from this point. Okay?"

"I suppose, if you want, Cassie."

"Mrs. Hayes, not Cassie, for the purposes of this exercise."

Cassie watched the other woman's reaction carefully.

"Okay, Mrs. Hayes."

"Good. Now, I have a set of very personal questions for you to answer, but before we start I want to make the ground rules clear."

Cassie paused, waiting until the other woman nodded.

"We are going to try a formal role-playing exercise designed to focus yourself on your relationship with your husband. By the end of the four-week period, we will assess your progress and work out the next steps. The choice will be from one of three possibilities: first, you want to stay with your husband and satisfy your needs within your marriage; second, you want to seek out another partner and we will talk about how that would work; or third, we continue the exercise for another month. We can terminate this at any time, but if we do I will never restart the exercise. Okay?"

On the screen, the woman's expression was serious. She nodded.

"I need to hear you agree."

"Yes, uh, Mrs. Hayes."

"Good, Vicki. Now, on to the personal questions. Firstly, how often do you masturbate?"

Victoria's eyes went round. Cassie felt butterflies in her stomach and took a steadying breath; then she began.

The rest of the session was dedicated to building up the framework, establishing behaviours that Cassie expected of her client for the month. The first rule was that she wasn't allowed to initiate sex with her husband: it had to be her husband's idea. That boundary accepted, Cassie moved on to the second rule: no touching herself, so that her only release would be provided by her husband. Eventually, Victoria had confessed to an active desire to pleasure herself, which Cassie noted down for later reference. She also observed the way that changing names had instantly transformed the dynamic between them. Cassie was now laying down the rules and Victoria was obeying them. As the hour came to a close, Cassie began to wrap up.

"Well, Vicki, I think we came a long way. As part of this exercise, I want you to feel free to message me any time you find yourself struggling with any aspect of my instructions. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Mrs. Hayes."

"Great. See you next time then."

"Yes, goodbye, Mrs. Hayes."

Cassie terminated the call and let out a long breath. She felt exhausted, but also excited. Her client had taken to her new role easily, naturally addressing her formally by the end of the session. She was going to put Victoria through her paces. It felt good to be in control.

---

Morgan had recommended the gym because she liked the owners, a husband-and-wife team in their late twenties, and Cassie had naturally deferred to her experience when it came to physical training. Morgan was a testament to a life-long dedication to athleticism and even after bearing a child later than most, her body showed none of the signs of it. Cassie had to admit to herself that this was one of the strongest selling points: getting back into shape after coasting for a few years since the twins.

Lately, that feeling had acquired a darker focus as she saw her husband's desire for a slimmer, fitter, younger body. Lily was still messaging her, reminding her of the tally in their little contest. It had the effect also of letting Cassie know every time that Lily fucked her husband: after work one Monday, in the car park before work on Thursday, twice on a Saturday afternoon while she took the children to a birthday party at the adventure playground. Each time, she would have to face Damian afterwards, see him smile at her and play with the boys, knowing that he had spent part of the day naked inside his beautiful blonde lover. She looked at the last message:

L: 7 -- 1. It's almost time to invoke the mercy rule

The mercy rule. Lily was going to take her husband away from her and Cassie couldn't do anything to stop it. Cassie sagged, feeling worthless and hopeless, replaceable. She took a deep breath to pull her thoughts together, checked the time, and headed through the front doors into the gym.

Cassie waited by the reception for a few minutes, dark thoughts tumbling through her head, until she saw Aidan approach her.

"Mrs. Hayes," he says, "Ready to go?"

Aidan was much taller than her, close-cropped brown hair and rugged features. Physically, he dominated her in the same way that Damian did; wide shoulders and muscled arms wrapped in a thin exercise top. For some reason, her mood began to lift. Yes, she thought as she made her decision, I'm going to ask Aidan for help.

"Keeping it up, I see," he said.

She smiled and posed for him. It felt good, having his attention focused on her.

"Feeling good," she replied, "Though I've got to be done by three to get the kids from school."

Aidan nodded, saying, "Rapid burn it is. You ready for some cardio?"

He led her towards the running machines as usual. Cassie's stomach flipped. Was she really going to do this? She stopped in the middle of the floor and could see Aidan's puzzlement. Cassie drew in a steadying breath.

"Actually, I have something else in mind, and I want a straight answer."

She could see his curiosity. Lily's face flashed in her mind, then the memory of the way her supple, young body moved under Damian's bulk. Cassie raised her chin and steeled herself.

"What do you think about my muscle tone?"

"It's excellent, Mrs. Hayes, like I said you're keeping it pretty tight."

His use of her surname sent a little spike through her, reminding her simultaneously of her cheating husband and also the exercise with Victoria. She desperately wanted to be anyone but Mrs. Hayes at that moment.

"Uh, sorry. What do you mean, Cass?"

"I was thinking, well, more like I was reading about these women that go in for body building."

Aidan didn't respond and Cassie began to cringe inwardly. The last thing she needed was for Aidan to tell her to be more realistic. She didn't need another person judging her body, but it was too late: she had set herself up for this.

"You mean the hard body look?"

"Yeah. I mean, no. Not full hard body, but I... uh."

It was all going wrong. Cassie faltered, feeling like an idiot.

Aidan stepped in, considering it. "You mean not full sculpted, a little softer?"

Relieved, Cassie nodded. "Maybe I need to pick something more realistic though."

"Tell me something Cass. Do you want to look good in the mirror?"

"Yes."

"Well, you already do. You know you look hot, right?"

Aidan smiled, even white teeth showing in his handsome face. She could see that he liked talking to her, that they shared a personal connection. She felt a tingle of excitement. It felt good to have his undivided attention; she allowed herself the brief thought of Aidan standing naked in the shower, the water running over his skin, and felt her body react.

"Look, the first step is assessing where you're at now. Let's get you in front of the mirrors and take a look."

"I'm probably over-dressed, though, right? Let me just go change real quick."

In the changing rooms, Cassie stripped off and pulled a change of clothes out of her bag: a sports bra and a pair of skin-tight exercise shorts. She inspected herself in the mirror, noting the way the bra shaped her cleavage. She was showing a lot more skin that she would have ever dared to do a few weeks ago, but this was part of the plan. She was going to transform herself and she needed Aidan's help to do that. Flicking her hair away from her face and gathering it up into a loose ponytail, she headed back out. Aidan was where she'd left him.

"I'm back," she called.

Aidan turned and for a moment, his expression was unguarded. His eyes travelled up and down her body, invoking a little thrill deep inside her, before he resumed his usual professional demeanour. She could see that he was struggling.

"Okay. Good. Uh, how about we start with biceps? Let's get the blood pumping," he said.

She saw Aidan wince. She could sense that there was something else at play; her body was making him uncomfortable. She relished the feeling, standing in front of him doing arm curls with the dumbbells he gave her. He glanced down at himself and Cassie noticed it too: a swelling in his shorts. Cassie's body responded in kind as she revelled in the fact that his view of her body was turning Aidan on. She needed to say something to him, push the boundaries between them, but Aidan moved quickly to the next exercise, asking Cassie to lie on the bench so he could spot for her as she lifted weights.

His eyes were on her body, but she was watching his face as she lifted the weight bar through her repetitions. It had never occurred to her that Aidan might even be interested in her, and the thought gave her a buzz. She had seen his wife, Rosa, the goddess in activewear who took Morgan's spin class; it was inconceivable that Aidan wasn't satisfied with having his wife's lithe, sexy body next to him in bed every night.

"Good muscle tone in the upper chest," Aidan said, "Let's see you do another ten."

He stood over her, his hands ready to support the bar if she got tired. From her position lying on the bench, Cassie found herself staring directly up at the bulge in his shorts. She noticed how awkwardly Aidan moved, stumbling slightly so that the bar came down onto the bulge in his crotch. There was a muffled sound and she felt the vibration of hard contact through the weight bar. Aidan looked down quickly at her, flustered.

"Okay," he said, quickly, "Let's move on to lower body, maybe do some leg presses and check out those quads."

Aidan lifted the weights from her hands, but was already on his way to the leg press before she could say anything to him. Cassie could see it in the way he walked, the uncomfortable pressure in his shorts. The sound had been unmistakeable: Aidan was wearing a cage. Sweating from the exercise, Cassie's cheeks took on a deeper glow as she watched the tall, muscled body in front of her. Such a powerful, sure man, forced into a cage, his manhood trapped in a tiny steel prison while he walked around the gym floor; the thought made her flush with a strange excitement. He was clearly unwilling, but who had such control over him that they could force him to do that?

It was definitely forced, she could see. Aidan's mood now made sense to her, his reluctance. She felt an illicit thrill inside as she realised she'd been adding to his misery, teasing him inadvertently with her body. Poor Aidan was frustrated and horny, and Cassie had just made it worse. The man was suffering.

It could only have been Rosa, she concluded. He was wearing it because his wife had made him. Cassie began to wonder what Aidan had done to deserve it, what indiscretions he had committed. It was true that he spent his days among women of all ages as they bent and stretched in figure-hugging activewear in front of him. Had he slipped and gone too far? Cassie shivered, looking at him, watching the muscles in his forearm contract as he reset the pin in the weight stack for her. Those arms around her body, that bulge, unfettered, pressed against her. Cassie felt herself react to the fantasy.

Cassie sat on the chair and placed her feet on the panel in front, beginning her repetitions. She watched the muscles in her legs strain as she pushed the panel forward. She could feel Aidan's eyes on her legs too, which only added to her bourgeoning arousal. Cassie tried to focus. She had to know.

"Do you mind if I ask you a personal question?" she asked.

"Sure."

"Is it very uncomfortable?"

She could see his sudden discomfort and knew that she had hit the mark.

"Uh, is what uncomfortable?"

"What you're wearing down there."

Her words were met with an awkward, embarrassed silence. Cassie pressed on.

"It's okay, I've seen them before," she improvised, desperate to keep the conversation going.

Aidan was unsure, jittery. "You have?"

"When did you start with the cage?"

She looked up at him, into his warm eyes. There was a helpless look in his expression that turned her on deeply; behind the bluster and professionalism, Cassie could sense how vulnerable he felt.

"I'm a relationship therapist," she said, trying to reassure him, "I've come across a wide range of behaviours."

Aidan didn't answer, diverting his eyes. Cassie instantly regretted mentioning it and didn't press any further. She allowed him to take her through the rest of the routine in silence, but it was clear that she had crossed the line and made him ashamed. She wanted to help him, it was part of her nature, but there was something else as well: an attraction to this man. It was something that had always been there, but now, with what was happening in her own life, her own tortures, she felt a connection with Aidan: they were suffering together. At the end of the session, they were standing in front of the changing rooms. Cassie cleared her throat and committed.

"Aidan, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked. It's just that it looks like it's bothering you. I wanted to maybe help. I didn't mean to embarrass you."

Aidan shrugged. "It's okay. Don't worry about it," he replied, seeming to want to switch topics.

"And what about you?" he asked, "Body sculpting is a long, hard road. To get that kind of definition takes a lot of work. Why do you want to do it?"

Cassie's heart pounded, looking into his lovely eyes. Now or never.

"My husband's cheating on me," she confessed.

The words hung in the air for a moment before she pushed on. "It's stupid and irrational, but I've seen the bitch he's fucking. I want to have a hotter body than she does."

"That's a little messed up."

"Don't I know it. I'm not practicing what I preach, that's for damn sure."

Cassie waited, forcing a smile, wanting Aidan to meet her halfway.

"I'm sorry he's cheating on you. He's a fool," Aidan replied, and Cassie felt a rush of strange excitement course through her.

Aidan straightened his shoulders and said, "I tell you what Cass, I'm gonna help you get that body. You're going to look smoking hot. We're going to make him reassess his life choices."

He grinned at her and she grinned back. "Sounds like a plan," she said.

Aidan's mood seemed to lift too, and replied, "See you on Wednesday."

"Yeah, uh, thank you, Aidan. It means the world to me, it really does. And in return, you know you can talk if you need to. Whatever's going on, sometimes just having someone to listen can make the world of difference."

That was as much as she could bear to say. She spun on her heel and nearly bolted for the changing rooms. Flirting with her personal fitness instructor was such a cliché, but all that Cassie knew was that it felt good. Aidan's eyes on her body, seeing the effect she had on him, it was like a blast of oxygen, a validation of her womanhood. She wasn't looking to cheat on her husband with him, but just at that moment, against the backdrop of everything else in her life, even the possibility was enough.

---

The call connected and once again she was presented with the view of Victoria on her couch, this time dressed in a loose top and sweatpants. Cassie could see her client's mood had changed since a week ago: now, she was pensive, withdrawn. It was time to move to the next phase of the exercise. Aidan's predicament was still on her mind, but it had inspired her.