Wild Horses

Kara was about 10 feet behind her dad who was maybe five feet behind Erin. She could hear every word they spoke but didn't say much herself. After about 20 minutes, she began warming up to this slightly-older, very cute 'girl' and realized she was also very intelligent. Not 'book smart' but she knew things Kara didn't, and yet she never came across as some kind of know it all. She just really did like to talk, and a lot of the talking was in response to the questions her dad was asking.

"So you can skin a deer, gut it, and...cut it up?" he asked after she talked about deer hunting with her grandfather. In Montana.

"I sure can," she replied with a laugh. "And the way I make it, you'll have no idea you're eating venison."

Kara laughed then continued by saying, "I'm not your typical girl, and I'm just fine with that. I'm the kind of girl who asked for a pressure cooker when she was 13 so I could can stuff."

Kara watched her dad pull his horse up next to Erin's after that, and for the rest of the ride, the two of them talked without more than a five-second pause.

"You okay back there?" Erin called out at the halfway point. "You're awfully quiet."

"I uh, I'm just having a good time watching my dad enjoy himself," she called back.

Her dad turned around and winked at her and Kara smiled.

"We uh, we lost her mom three years ago," Rick said a little more quietly.

"Oh, my gosh. I am SO sorry! For her and for both of you," she replied immediately.

"Thank you," Rick told her.

Kara expected him to go on and on about her mother, but when Erin didn't ask, her dad didn't offer anything else, and that really surprised her.

"It's not the same thing, but I lost my husband, too," she replied.

"What? That's exactly the same thing," Kara called up to her, now feeling sorry for her.

"No. Not really," she called back as she looked over her shoulder.

"I caught him in bed with another woman, and I threw him out. I have no idea where is he, so I kinda did lose him, right?"

Erin laughed again, and as much as Kara didn't want to, she found herself laughing, too.

"Bastard!" she said as she chuckled, causing her dad to turn around again.

He didn't give her the look this time. He just winked then laughed.

"Well, good for you," he said to Erin. "You're a very nice young lady, and you deserve better than that."

"Well, thank you for saying that, good sir!" she told him, a smile on her freshly-scrubbed looking face as she pointed out something to their left.

"You're just in time for the last of the cattle branding. They usually do it all in the summer, but we had several calves born later and they're getting the old Diamond D mark."

"Does it hurt?" Kara asked as one young cow bellowed after being branded. It was then released and ran out of the gate but stopped a few feet later and began eating from a pile of hay that was put their for them.

"I'm sure it does, but I don't think it lasts long. And it'll all be healed up in no time."

She went on to explain that the Diamond D had over 600 head of beef cattle and that they got moved around between a bunch of pasture land the owners had.

"Can't risk losing any of them, you know."

"Makes sense," Rick said before asking how they did during the pandemic.

"We couldn't hold any summer camp sessions--the pandemic and all--and that was tough, but as I said, this is a cattle ranch, and most of their income comes from selling beef."

"Ugh!" Kara said a little too loudly.

"If you're a vegan I'll be quiet," Erin told her.

"I am but I'm not...militant about it."

"How about you, Rick?"

"Me? I eat meat. I don't care for red meat but I eat plenty of chicken, fish, and shrimp."

"Do you eat venison?" Erin asked before apologizing to Kara.

"It's okay. As long as the deer aren't killed for sport."

"When my grandpa kills a deer we eat everything that can be eaten. Just like the Indians did."

Kara turned back around, apologized yet again, then correct herself.

"Sorry. The Native Americans."

"To answer your question, I've never had venison," Rick told her rather quietly.

Keeping to her promise, Erin didn't say another word about deer, venison or any other meat, but she and Rick talked the rest of the way in. It wasn't until she was asking for their horses that he realized that for the first time since losing his wife he felt...alive. That feeling caused a sense of guilt which quickly wiped out the short-lived happiness he'd been experiencing, but it came back when Erin told him she'd really enjoyed talking with him.

"Most of my riders are, well, a little...boring. Many don't say a word the entire time we're out. Occasionally, a couple that doesn't speak much English goes on a ride, and that's a little difficult for me, too. But you were...different."

She smiled as she took the horse's reins from him, and when she did, Rick's feelings of joy returned. "Different in a good way."

"I enjoyed talking with you, too, Erin. You can't be much older than my daughter, but it felt like I was talking to someone with a lot more...life experience."

She gave him a funny look which caused him to say, "I didn't mean it like that. I suppose it's more that I've never met anyone with, well, with your...experience set."

"Ah, okay. I can live with that," she told him, the smile back on her pretty face; a face with no makeup that still looked great. Even the cowboy hat on head looked like it belonged there, Kara begrudgingly thought as she carefully watched her father's responses.

Still not convinced he'd made his point, Rick took another stab at it.

"Maybe what I'm trying to say is I've never met a woman, of any age, who can skin a deer or can...anything...or who loves the outdoors the way you do."

Erin smiled up at him again then said, "With me, what you see is what you get. No frills, no complications. Just lil' old me. And I still love to can anything that can be...canned."

Rick laughed again, and the latest round of resentment that had built back up in Kara dissipated again. She waited patiently then thanked Erin when she took Hatfield from her but didn't say anything else. Not even when her father handed her five twenty-dollar bills as a tip.

"Wow! Thank you. That's extremely kind of you, Rick. And very generous," Erin told him.

What she didn't tell him was how much she needed money at that particular time. It was ten days until Christmas and she wasn't sure how she was going to buy her dad anything with what little money she had. This would allow her to do that, and she was genuinely grateful.

"You made me feel good, Erin, and that's worth more than a few bucks," he told her sincerely.

"Well, thank you again. And you were both really fantastic," she said to her former riders as she led Hatfield back the stable.

She turned and waved as Rick and his daughter headed for their car.

"That was pretty great, huh?" Rick said once his daughter got in and put on her seatbelt.

"Yeah. It was...nice."

He could tell something was wrong and looked over at Kara.

"You didn't enjoy the ride?"

Without looking back at him Kara responded.

"I did. The ride was great."

"But?"

Kara finally glanced over then said, "What?"

"Was it Erin?"

"I don't know," his daughter replied the way she used to when she was younger and had done something wrong after being asked what had happened.

"She seemed...genuine," her dad said as he started the car.

"Yeah. I guess so."

He started to back out but stopped.

"Kara? What's eating you?"

She wanted to answer the question but realized she didn't know how to because she wasn't sure why this cute blonde girl who liked 'killin' stuff' irked her so much.

"Is it that she eats meat?" her dad asked politely, knowing how his daughter felt about that.

"Partly. But maybe it's more that she...."

Kara stopped in hopes of the right words coming. When they didn't she just shrugged and let it go.

"You didn't think I was...flirting with her...did you?"

As soon as her dad spoke those words she knew he'd just hit the nail on the head. She looked back over at him then spoke.

"Yeah. Maybe I did," she quietly said before asking, "were you?"

"What? No! Of course not. Kara, she's your age for cryin' out loud."

"Dad. She is NOT my age! She's gotta be at least 25 if not closer to 30."

Her father understood and didn't tell her that to him, a few years--especially at his age--was no big deal. To Kara, even five years was huge, but to him they really did seem about the same age.

"Regardless, she's still way too young for me. I...I was just having a nice time."

Kara felt so guilty it almost made her sick to her stomach.

"Dad. I...I'm really sorry. You're right. She was just being...friendly. I don't know why I let her get under my skin like that."

"You've been trying to get me to start dating again for several months, and I just haven't been ready. But the first time I'm even a little friendly with a woman you get upset. Help me understand."

Feeling even worse, Kara tried to fix the problem she'd created.

"Maybe it's just the thought of you actually, you know, ever being with another woman. Conceptually, I want you to find someone to love and who'll love you, but in practice, I think that when I visualize you, you know...."

Her father didn't even think about 'making love' as what Kara meant. He understood her perfectly well, and all she had in mind was hand holding and maybe some kissing.

"Honey? I'm not gonna be doing...any of that stuff...with her. Or with any other woman, okay?"

Feeling better, Kara looked back over at her dad.

"Who you date or fall in love with and eventually marry is none of my business, Dad. I really, truly just want you to be happy again."

Her dad laughed then leaned over to the point where his eyes were right in front of hers, "Even if it's with someone...your age?"

Kara playfully shoved him causing her father to laugh. When he did, she laughed, too, then told him she really did enjoy the ride.

"I'm glad, honey. And don't forget, this was all your idea."

His daughter sighed then said, "Yes. Yes, it was, wasn't it?"

Her dad chuckled again then backed out and put the car in drive.

"You know, I'm really glad we did this. Thanks, K-K."

"Me, too, Daddy," she told him, feeling safe and secure with the only man she'd ever loved even as that thought reminded her of her own new love interest.

"Dad? I don't know if this is the right time or not, but...I uh, I kinda met someone myself. At school."

"Oh? Is it serious?" her father asked as he wriggled his eyebrows.

"Da-dee! Stop! No. We only met a couple of weeks ago. But so far I...I really like him."

"Should I be worried?" he asked in an overly protective way that made her again say, "Dad! Stop that!"

"And no, you don't need to be worried. I just wanted to let you know."

"Okay. But if you ever want to talk about it...or him...you know you can, right?"

"I do know, and I love you for that," Kara replied as she smiled at her father who noticed and smiled, too.

"I love you, too, kiddo, and this was a really good idea. Thank you."

Kara felt happy and deeply self-satisfied knowing she'd finally found something that cheered her father up, and now that 'Little Miss Sunshine' wasn't an issue, she felt like she didn't have a care in the world on the ride home.

*****

January 3rd, 2022

"I can't believe you gotta go back so soon," Rick told his daughter after helping her load her things into the car.

"Tell me about it. Winter break just flew by!"

"I love having you home, honey," her dad said as he held out his arms for a hug.

Kara embraced him and told him she loved being home, too.

When he let go he opened her car door.

"You be careful, okay?"

"I will. I promise. And I'll text you when I get in."

"You better. And tell this new beau of yours 'hello' for me."

"Beau?" Kara said with a laugh. "Erin must have rubbed off on you more than I thought."

Her dad hadn't mentioned the cute, country blonde since leaving the ranch, but he'd thought about her many times, and truth be told, he was still thinking about her.

"What's next? You going deer hunting and learning how to gut 'em, skin 'em and cook 'em?" Kara asked playfully.

Rick laughed along with his daughter, but the truth was, he'd be willing to do those things or even learn how to can peaches or whatever people canned, if he could see this young, pretty girl again. But that wasn't going to happen because he was 42 years old and she was--almost--Kara's age.

"Safe travels, honey!" her dad said as he closed her door without responding to her question.

He stood in the driveway and waved until Kara was out of sight then turned around and went back inside his cold, lonely house where he lived. Alone. By himself. With no one else around. And for the first time since the detective came to his door that day the thought of living alone was no longer okay.

Still, it took him nearly 72 hours to sit down at the computer and look, but after three of the longest, loneliest days of his life, he did just that.

"Let's see. Bring up Google then type in Diamond D ranch."

It came up at the top of the search list, and when he went to the ranch's website he smiled. There weren't any photos of any people, but he knew someone who worked there, and just the thought of that someone made him happy. He saw how to make a reservation to ride and the various rides that were available, but he wasn't going to do that online because of the 'no refund' policy.

He saw the phone number, took a deep breath, then entered the digits, hit 'dial' and waited.

The same gravelly voice he remembered answered the phone saying, "Diamond D. How may I help you?"

"Yes, ma'am. I uh, I was at the ranch a couple of weeks ago with my daughter, and I was wondering if I could maybe book another ride."

"Sure can. It's real easy on our website. Do you know how to find it?"

He didn't tell her he was looking at it. He just told her he wanted to do it over the phone.

"Okay. We don't have many folks call in a reservation these days, but I can book you. Just give me a minute, okay, hun?"

He heard her set the old style phone down followed by the sound of papers being shuffled then heard the receiver being picked up.

"Okay. Go ahead. What' the last name?"

"Nelson. But I...I have a...a request."

"Okay. What's the request? If it's for a specific horse, we can't always promise that one'll be available."

"No. I uh, I was hoping I could get Erin as my guide again. She was really, um, knowledgeable."

The next thing he heard was the woman calling out, "Erin? You over there?"

Rick listened even more carefully after hearing her name.

"Uh-huh. What's goin' on, Grandma?"

Just the sound of her voice made him happy, and to his surprise, Mister...Happy...got happy, too.

"There's a guy callin' to set up a ride, but he only wants to do it if you can be his guide."

"Who is it?" he heard Erin ask.

"What's the name again?" the older woman asked him.

"Nelson. Rick Nelson."

"Oh, okay. You been to any Garden Parties lately?" she asked, followed by a gravelly laugh.

"Garden Party" was one of Ricky Nelson's hit songs, but it had been many years since anyone pulled that one on him. He dutifully laughed then told her he hadn't. At least not recently.

"Tell you what, Mr. Nelson. It'd be easier to let you talk to my granddaughter yourself, okay?"

Before he could reply, he heard Erin's voice again.

"Hey there, handsome! You callin' to go deer huntin' with me? If you are, it's a long way to Montana!"

She was teasing, but the fact that she even remembered him caused a surge of emotion. That she'd said exactly what Kara had teased him about stunned him for a moment or two.

"Deer hunting? No. I...I was just hoping that, you know, we...that I...I might be able to book another ride. At the ranch."

Erin laughed then told him that's where all of the rides took place--at the ranch. He had to be at least 15 years older than her, but the way he felt, it seemed like he was about 15 years old himself.

"Right. Yeah, I guess that's true."

"Hey, you know I'm just bustin' your chops, right? When do you want to come by?"

He hadn't given the time or date any thought and once again he felt a little off balance.

"I don't know. I guess that depends on when you're available," he sort of got out without stumbling too much.

"I moved back here after the divorce, so I'm here pretty much 24/7. Except when I'm out killin' and skinnin' deer."

He realized she was still teasing and laughed.

"Let's start with how long you want to ride first, okay?" she suggested.

"I was thinking maybe two hours this time?"

"Okay. Now we need a date."

As he was looking at his calendar she said with a little laugh, "Not a date, per se, but a day of the week kinda date."

Rick laughed nervously then told her, "Yeah, right. Like you'd ever end up on a date with the likes of me!"

Her reply so unnerved him he nearly couldn't speak.

"Honestly, Rick? I can think of a whole lotta things worse than that."

She didn't laugh when she said it, and it actually sounded kind of sweet. It took him several seconds to respond, and when he did, he could tell his voice had changed.

"I see. Yeah, that would...that would really be...."

Erin saved him by saying, "Not terrible. Well, for me, anyway. I don't suppose someone as handsome and...sophisticated...as you would be too awfully interested in a cowgirl/tomboy like me--age aside."

Surprised again, Rick said, "Sophisticated. Wow. I don't think anyone has ever said that about me before."

"You just struck me as someone who, you know, is all buttoned down. Office job, shirt and tie, fancy car, big house, etc. But you also have this...way about you. You're...nice. And you made me laugh. But me? I'm a girl who loves trucks and shootin' guns and red meat, and a girl who wouldn't be caught dead working inside pushing papers around. My dream is to have a little log cabin somewhere out in the middle of nowhere where I can hunt, fish, and ride horses all the time."

She paused, laughed, then added, "And maybe even a dog or two."

She paused again then added, "Just not a Poodle or any kind of yappy dog. I'm talking Labrador Retriever, you know?"

Wanting to say something but not sure what, he forced a laugh then said, "Just no kids, right?"

Erin, however, didn't laugh.

"I love kids. I just never thought I'd really ever meet anyone who'd share my dreams, so I keep that to myself. But I love kids. Just no cats, either, okay?"

When Rick didn't answer, Erin reminded him she was still waiting on that date.

"Sorry. Yes, the date that isn't a date," he said a little nervously as he tried to concentrate on the calendar on his computer screen.

"Is...tomorrow too soon?" he asked so tentatively he felt foolish.

"Nope. You could come over now if you wanted to. It's been dead as 4 o'clock in the morning around here lately, but that's pretty typical for this time of year."

"I...I suppose I could do that. I just thought you'd need some advance notice."

"If it was summer, you might not be able to get a horse even with two weeks notice."

"Oh, right. You do the camp thing, huh?" Rick said, remembering what Erin had told him.

She laughed then said, "Yes. The camp thing."

He laughed, too, but his was out of nervousness.

"Maybe tomorrow would be best. If you don't mind."

"I don't mind at all," she told him.

Her voice softened and the country in it dropped off when she also told him, "I'd enjoy seeing you again. Anytime."

Again, her words sent his mind reeling as he wondered if she was just being nice or could it even be possible she was flirting with him?

"Oh. I...that's great," he replied, stumbling and stammering as he did.