Written In the Stars Ch. 03

A/N: Please note that this is a novel-length story. It will be a sweet, slow burn until Ch. 06 for these two, but we promise that it will be worth the wait.

~ LivANDJay

--- Chapter Three ---

"Whew... I think that worked," Nathan whispered when we finally made it out of the hall and back into the living room.

"I knew one of your stories would do the trick," I said. He had done such a good job I didn't even add in a jibe about him boring them to sleep. Nate smirked to himself as we tip-toed our way down the hall. He led us into the kitchen where he recovered the glass he had drained before dinner and then went to the liquor cabinet to refresh his drink.

"Some nights I really envy Darren... Kate and Lewis are so great," he said, his eyes glazing over a little a he uncapped the bottle and started to pour. His tone had a kind of thoughtful consideration to it. "I know I'm putting the cart before the horse, but do you know if that's something you need from life?" He asked as he finished pouring his drink and turned to face me. I stood there for a moment, reeling from the question. We had been lucky enough to have time here and there to talk about his novel and have a quick catch up over the past couple of years, but questions like that were much deeper than we usually dealt with.

"I... uh, well yeah," I admitted with a shrug. I hadn't really talked to anyone but Hannah about that kind of thing. She knew from how much I adored her kids that I wanted some of my own one day, and even though Darren was the last kind of person I would ever want to be with, I wanted a relationship like the one they had. There was so much love, understanding, and commitment between the two that you couldn't help but get dewy-eyed just thinking about it.

"Honestly..I was hoping that my last few dates may put forth some suitable candidates to do that with, but they were all flops. I'm not having any luck at all. I'm kind of starting to wonder if it'll ever happen for me," I lamented as I leaned against the bench.

"It will. You're too wonderful to wind up alone..." Nate said, as he put the drinks away. I was glad his back was to me because he wouldn't see the way that his comment made me blush. I cleared my throat and stood a little straighter as I watched him, trying to play it cool when my heart was fluttering against my ribs like a caged bird.

"And what about you?" I asked casually. I had a feeling I already knew the answer, but I was curious to see if I still had a good read on my best friend, or if time and distance had changed things.

"If they turn out like those kids, absolutely..." Nate said smiling, but then his smile faltered as he turned away to clean up the kitchen a bit more. I could see the tension in his shoulders, and it was still there when he turned back to me, drink in hand, and led the way to the back door. "Come on, can't leave the parents unsupervised for much longer..." He said. Now he was the one pretending to be casual. My brows furrowed at that change in him, and I reached out as he went to move past me, resting my hand on his forearm.

"Hey, Nate, that was a bit of a flip... What's going on?" I asked, picking up on the internal conflict that answering his own question had caused.

Nate rubbed his arm as he looked away.

"I... don't have the best habits sometimes... and I don't want that to rub off on my kids or wind up being a bad dad if they show up at the wrong time..." He said, dancing around what those habits could possibly be. I frowned as I looked up at him as I kept my hand on his arm, his skin warm under my hand. I was tempted to ask what could be so horrible that it would worry him so much, but I filed it away for another time.

"Well, Darren has some hella' bad habits, but Kate and Lewis are beautiful. Nate, I don't know what kind of bad habits you think you might have, but I am pretty certain you'd make a great father," I said to him, keeping my voice low so we wouldn't be overheard if someone opened the back door.

Nate's smile warmed as he looked over at me. "I'm glad to have you a lot closer if you're going to be my cheerleader like this," He said, pulling me into a quick hug before he sighed and let go. "Come on... they're probably-"

With a smooth schlick the back door slid open and Darren's voice drifted into the living room.

"Thanks for getting the kids to bed, Uncle Nate and Aunty Nessa... Ooh, you know, that does have a nice ring to it..."

Nate's mood was ruined instantly by the ever present niggling of his family. He strode across the yard and stood over his older brother, pointing down at him. With the two men standing so close it was clear that Darren really was the little-big brother.

"Enough, okay? You will not start this nonsense with Kate and Lewis too. It's bad enough that I hear it from everyone in my family already," Nate warned in a tone that I don't think I had ever heard before. I struggled to remember a time when he had been so angry. I raced over to defuse the situation as Darren stepped back, looking somewhat shocked at suddenly being stood over like that. He was used to pushing people around, but not to them pushing back. Maybe this was what he needed.

"Nate, it's fine, your brother's just being a dick," I said, glaring at Darren as I stood up beside Nathan. I put my hand on Nate's arm, hoping to pull him back a little. Hannah, who had been sitting on one of the outdoor chairs turned in her seat and watched. She had such a preternaturally keen radar for tension ever since Kate and Lewis learned how to bicker.

"Yes, he is, and I will not have his behavior spread to his kids," Nate continued, not wanting to let it go this time, especially as the kids were in bed and were clear of hearing any arguments.

"Hey!" Darren snapped, standing a little taller and meeting Nate's eyes as his children were drawn into the argument. "Watch what you're saying mate. You have no idea how I've been raising my kids. And what I said? It was a damn joke. When did you lose your sense of humour?"

I looked over at Hannah, dumbfounded by this turn of events. She met my eyes and gave me a nod, slipping out of her chair and walking over to join us. She stood beside Darren, sliding her hand into his. He didn't even seem to notice.

"I lost it when your joke entered year twenty-five of use... Will you finally just drop it? I don't want Kate and Lewis picking up this habit," Nate said. I could see in his face that this was probably a long time time coming. Everyone has their breaking point and it seemed like he had reached his.

Darren rolled his eyes.

"I don't see what the big fucking deal is," He said, throwing his hands up in the air. "As you said, it's been going on twenty-five years. You think you'd have learned to take it with a grain of salt by now."

"Just keep it from ticking over to another generation. I can take it from you, but not from them. They won't know any better," Nate said, his shoulders deflating as some of the fight seemed to go out of him. He turned to walk away.

Now, Nate might have been the kind who was able to walk away, but Darren wasn't. After how Nate had fired up at him it was clear that it would take a while to cool his temper. Hannah tugged on his hand to draw him away, but he couldn't help but let words fly anyway.

"What's the problem with it, anyway?" Darren asked, stepping towards Nate. Nate stopped in his tracks and everyone else froze.

"You know what the problem is... I've been hearing that crap all my life; at some point you have to accept things how they are." Nate didn't even bother turning around.

"Yeah, and maybe at some point you have to accept that you and Vanessa would be great together, even though you're too stupid to see it," Darren snarled, turning on his heel and going to walk away, the smug look on his face showing that he clearly thought he had the best last word.

"Darren!" Hannah tugged on his hand roughly, fixing him with a nasty glare. I stood there, breath caught in my throat, knowing that Darren may have just taken it too far.

"Well, shouting at me to do it for twenty-five years hasn't worked, maybe another twenty-five will! Do you know the definition of insanity, Darren?" Nate's voice was loud enough now to draw the attention of the parents sitting down-wind. They all sat up a little taller as they turned to see what was going on.

"No, actually I don't, but I'm sure you do though since you're bloody insane. Why don't you tell me?" Darren snapped, stepping closer to Nate and puffing his chest out. I think we could all see that the tension was reaching breaking point between them now.

"Darren, don't do this," Hannah hissed, pulling on his other arm. I watched, looking between to two brothers.

"Because talking about her like she's my wife around the kids isn't going to suddenly guilt me into pursuing her anymore than all the talk about it until this point!" Nate growled, his finger jabbing in the air towards me.

His words hit me like a physical blow. All of the breath whooshed out of me and my stomach spiraled down a hundred meters. My fingers unwound from Nate's and my hand dropped to my side as my shoulders sagged. Seeing how his words had affected me, Hannah pushed forward and stood between the two brothers.

"Right, that's enough, from the both of you!" She snapped in her best 'mum' voice. "She is standing right next to you, and her name is Vanessa. You should show some more respect for your best friend. And just for the record, Vanessa is the best damn aunty my kids could ever wish for, and that has nothing to do with whether she is with you or not! She has been there for both of them since the moment they were both born, more so than my own sister ever has been. So this isn't about you, alright?" She chastised, holding Nate's gaze until he backed down.

Then, Hannah rounded on Darren.

"And you?" She poked his chest with a rough jab of her finger. "You need to learn when to back the hell off." She then snatched up her husband by the elbow and dragged him away, whispering furiously at him with each step they took.

~*~

Nate and I just stood there, side by side, unable to look each other in the eye. It had been so long since I'd seen him and Darren fight that it was a shock to my system. And the other part of it? Well, his words were like a steel fist clenching around my heart; even if it was clear that he recognized he was wrong. An unsteady silence filled the back yard as Hannah and Darren went off to talk and the parents went back to their conversation, leaving Nate and I alone to deal with the fallout of what just happened.

"Nessa, I..." Nate started as he tried to find the words. "I... can't begin to apologize enough. After dealing with my family and their incessant pestering, I- I guess I'm defensive about how they talk about us. I try to nip things in the bud before they get new ammunition to use... like I did here.I should have known better and I'm sorry that I made it about me again."

Even after saying it, he couldn't look me in the eyes.

I let out a soft breath to delay whatever response I would have to scratch around in my brain for. I couldn't find the right word to express how I was feeling. There were so many emotions tearing at me inside, spurred on by the adrenalin from witnessing that encounter.

"It... It's fine," I lied quietly, even though it clearly wasn't.

"No, it's not..." Nate said as he turned to face me. "Do you want to go somewhere and talk?" he asked, looking a bit more worried now.

I didn't know what he could possibly say that would fix the way I was feeling inside. I shook my head.

"No, look, tonight isn't about any of that. Tonight is about New Year's Eve, about you being back here with your family... Can we just- can we just get back to that?" I asked, looking up at him and wishing my eyes didn't sting the way they did.

"We can... Let's just enjoy the rest of the night," Nate said finally, turning to walk along with me as made for the empty sun lounges at the back of the deck.

We settled into the lounges and I laid back, watching the sky as the smoke from the early fireworks slowly cleared away. There was an unusually thick silence; the things he had said like a barrier between us. From the way he shifted uncomfortably in his seat and his mouth opened and closed several times I could see that he was trying to figure out what to say to make things right.

"It's not that you're someone I wouldn't consider-I just...I'm sorry, that came out all wrong, but you understand my point at least, hopefully, right?" He asked as his hand slid across the arm of the chair and his fingers curled around mine. I shrugged, not able to look over at him. I knew exactly what he meant, but that didn't make it hurt any less. It seemed my heart broke a little more with every new thing he said.

"They're just excited you're moving home. I'm sure you'll find some nice lady when you get back and they will all just have to shut up," I managed to say casually. I could feel Nathan's eyes on my face as he turned to look at me, giving my hand a gentle squeeze.

"If I do, I really hope that she can cope with me having you in my life. I could live with how we had to operate over the last few years, but if I'm coming back, we're best friends again."

"Well, if the ladies don't jump at a chance to be with you then they're fools. There aren't many guys like you around," I told him as I turned back to face him. The last ten minutes aside, Nate was a truly wonderful man. There were so many times in past relationships when I had compared my partner to Nathan and found them lacking in so many ways. "Either way, I'm glad you're moving back. I missed my best friend."

"Me too. If nothing else this time away has shown me how special you are to me," Nathan said as his thumb started to gently rub over my hand, sending shivers running up my spine and leaving me more than a little breathless. I was trying to figure out something to say in reply when we were rudely shocked out of the moment.

"Oooooh!" The sound of the parents cooing from a distance made Nathan snatch his hand away and sit up.

"Fuck, really?" He called out, clearly annoyed. "Sober up, you drunks!"

Even though he had intended to tell them off, all Nathan managed to do was make them double over with laughter. His eyes narrowed at them before he turned back to me and tried to ignore the bunch of old biddies in the corner. He had to take a few moments to calm himself, but when he did his shoulders set in determination.

"Screw it, I'll deal with that if the end result is hanging out with you again... You'd better stock your fridge with soda though. My preference has turned into an obsession, thanks to America."

"Please don't tell me you're calling it soda now," I groaned in mock horror. He gave me a look of utter reproach.

I laughed out loud and then we just sat back, the tension from earlier was still there; an undercurrent threatening to tug away the progress we'd just made. But, slowly... Slowly, but surely, we both started to breathe easier. His hand was firm and warm around mine. Eventually we both got enough time and space, and the silence became more companionable until our folks called us in for dessert. I opted to skip the mousse cake and custard as I could smell how heavily laced with alcohol it all was. Instead I helped myself to some fruit from the kitchen and everyone gathered around the dining table again to talk and catch up. In an attempt to make things alright again, Darren and Hannah regaled us with some amusing stories of what Lewis and Kate had gotten up to. Then my parents and the Taylors started comparing their retirement countdowns. Sure enough, the night wore on, and before we all knew it, midnight had crept up on us.

~*~

My folks decided that they and the Taylors would watch the fireworks from the deck, and Darren and Hannah were happy with leaning against the back fence. Considering how long it had been since Nate had been home, I suggested that we head out the back gate and walk a little further upstream so we could get clear of some of the trees (and the prying eyes of our parents).

"It's so funny to me because it's not even New Year's Eve in a good chunk of the world yet," Nathan said as we strolled out of my parent's backyard and onto the running path that ran between the houses and the river. He looked down at his watch and then nodded as if to confirm it. Instead of tucking his hand back into his pocket, Nathan slung his arm casually around my shoulder. As we walked past the last house in the row we cleared the final gum tree and came up behind a small crowd of people who had gathered on this bend of the river to watch the fireworks. One of them had their phone set to stream a local radio station, and everyone fell silent as the presenters announced that the countdown was about to begin.

"This is how you celebrate New Year's Eve," Nathan sighed contentedly as we stood there. I tried to pay attention to the countdown but all I could feel was his warm arm around my shoulder.

"Ten..."

The people on the river bank started to count along with the radio stream.

"Oh shoot... the kiss! The Midnight Kiss!" Nathan said, looking a forlorn at this apparent oversight.

"Nine..."

I looked up at Nathan, confused. What was the point of saying that? It wasn't like there was anyone around to kiss him. He bit his lip as he looked down at me and I felt my whole face heat up at the suggestion behind his lovely blue eyes.

"Eight..."

"I know what they would say... But, I mean, we're both out here alone," Nate suggested.

My heart skipped a beat.

"Seven..."

"Are you serious?" I asked, my brows furrowing in confusion. Wasn't this everything he had been fighting against for as long as he could remember?

" Six..."

"Yes," Nate said, I raised a brow in question, not certain that he knew exactly what he was asking for

"Really?".

"Five..."

"Four..."

"Yes. I'm sure." The second time was firmer. I could see the resolve in Nate's eyes as he nodded.

"Three..."

All of the reasons and worries and fears in my head screeched to a grinding halt. I didn't know if that was what he really wanted, or what he thought he should be doing, but I couldn't pass up the opportunity.

"Two..."

"Fuck it," I whispered, stepping in front of him. I put my hands on his chest and used the front of his t-shirt to tug him down to my level.

"One!"

Then, I kissed him.

"HAPPY NEW YEAR!"

With a thundering boom the fireworks started.

In that moment everything around us faded into the night. The cheers, the bangs and sizzles, the blindingly beautiful lights of the pyrotechnics... All I could feel was how warm and firm his chest was under my hands. How it rose and fell a little faster beneath my palms. How his body softened as his lips gave in to mine. I tried to drink in every sensation, every taste, every smell, everything that was Nathan and I in that moment.

Then, after what felt like an eternity cut short, Nathan gently rested his hand on my hip and stepped back. When he looked down at me something passed behind his eyes that I couldn't recognise. I couldn't speak, I could barely think, all I knew was that if his hand wasn't on my hip in that moment I might have melted into a puddle of utter nerves. He just looked at me as he processed what we had done.

"Nate, say something," I whispered, unable to deal with that charged silence any longer.

"Wow... that- that felt like a real kiss." Nathan's piercing blue eyes caught mine and I couldn't look away. "That was a good way to start this year, thank you."

"Y-you're welcome," I stuttered, biting my lip and trying to stop my mind from exploding.