Yes, I'm the Asshole

byTx Tall Tales©

We had lunch, and she sat next to me, always touching me, feeding me from her plate. It wasn't that different from the old days. She'd always been affectionate. Maybe not to this degree, but not surprising from her.

She excused herself to go to the bathroom, and I considered running before it got any weirder. Sadly, I wanted more of that pussy. Leaving me half done in the limo had me worked up. She still looked awesome. The rubbing she was giving me, between the legs, didn't help.

It took her a few minutes but she returned and sidled up beside me. "I texted him. Told him I was sorry, but he knew that I'd go back to you, if you'd have me. I told him to keep my stuff, donate it, whatever. I don't want any of it. It's sullied by being with him. We're starting over, and I swear, you'll never regret it."

She pulled me down and kissed me hard. Got a little of my bacon cheeseburger out of it. Fuckin' thief. "This was good for us, don't you understand? I learned. Learned the pain, and how much I needed you. I could never, ever, cheat on you again. Impossible. I'm going to be the best wife in the world, I swear it. Angel in public, and the hottest little slut in private."

She nibbled one of the french fries, and leaned her head on my shoulder. "You're not saying much. You're happy right?"

I reached around her shoulders and gave her a hug. "We've got three years of not having sex to make up for."

She squealed happily, tossed way to much money on the table, and dragged me out of there. Blew me in the car on the way home. She was naked by the time she made it to the bedroom, and I was only moments behind her.

I leaned back, watching her suck my cock. She looked up at me smiling. "I know I have a lot to make up for. Anything you want. Any fantasy you've ever had, whatever you can think of, it's yours for the asking. I won't deny you anything. My bottom? It's yours. Virgin and all yours. Tie me up? Spank me? Call me names? Invite my best friend over? Anything, honey."

"Ride me, cowgirl," I teased.

She laughed, mounting my cock, and rode me energetically. She was a wild woman, and I played with her tits, while she took care of me. There's no denying she'd always been a hell of a fuck, and if anything, she was better. That irritated me.

She slowed down, rocking slowly. "Why the frown, baby?"

"You're better. He teach you that?"

She pouted. "It's true I let him have me. I owed him that much. He never came in my mouth. Never got my ass. He ate me a lot, he loved that, and I didn't feel as guilty as with other things, so I encouraged it. He would eat me for hours, and get so worked up that half the time he'd pop before he could even get his little weanie inside me."

She laid down on top of me, while I held her. I guess she was in a confessing mood.

"He loves me, Ricky. Loves me like I love you. Totally, without restraint. Insensibly. I could insult him, humiliate him, treat him like shit, and he'd crawl back to me. I felt bad sometimes, using him. Using his love like that. But he knew I didn't love him. That I loved you. He said he was patient. That I'd learn to love him."

She kissed me softly. "Never. I'd never love him. There's only space for one man in my heart, and it's you. It always was. It always will be."

"You loved me so much you cheated on me," I reminded her.

She clung to me. "You can't understand. The way he adored me, the puppy dog eyes, the pleading, the begging. God, he wanted me so badly, that I finally decided to put him out of his misery. I slept with him. I didn't enjoy it, I barely did anything, but he... he was delirious with joy. It's a mind rush. That anyone could want you that badly."

"I cheated on you. Twice. I hate myself for that. It wasn't anything you did. Never. You were all I ever wanted. It wasn't out of love for him, or lust, or anything like that. It wasn't even the sex, which was never very good, at least not for me. It was the power over him. The sick adoration. I used him, and then threw him away. I tried to be gentle but it was over, and he was devastated. I totally destroyed him. And then I lost you." She lowered her head and started crying.

I held her, fucking her gently, while she composed herself. It was kind of a kick, the way her body shook while she was sobbing. I could feel it on my cock. Wild. "I realized what I'd done, and swore that somehow, someway I'd make it up to you. I operated in a daze for months. I was useless. Tried to hurt myself a few times. Spent a lot of time with councilors who don't know shit. Telling me I had to move on. No way! That wasn't going to happen!"

She kissed me, sat up and started fucking me fiercely. "I was right, they were wrong! I knew we'd get back together. We loved each other too much. All we needed was time."

I groaned, thrusting into her. "Fuck, I've missed this pussy."

She grinned. "Never again, lover. It's yours anytime you want. Anywhere. Any way."

I held her hips, feeling the need rushing upon me, and powered another nice load home.

It was a hell of a weekend. We ignored the phones, the knocking on the door. We hardly left the bedroom. We ate in there, we fucked, we showered, we played. I tried a lot. Not everything, it was only a couple of days, but a whole lot.

Her first anal was difficult. We took our time getting her ready, and still had problems. But she refused to give up, and the second time we tried, I penetrated her. We managed to do a little fucking. She embraced the pain, and allowed me to have her. Twice more in the butt that weekend, until we learned how she could almost enjoy it.

I spanked her a few times. Tied her up and teased her endlessly. That was good, because, let's face it. I'm only a man. Can only keep it up so long. But there's a lot of toys you can play with, and I found I could keep her rolling for hours. Blindfolded, ice play. Feathers. I searched through the house, finding appropriately sized and shaped things to fit inside her. There were quite a few. I don't know how many times I made her come for me, but it had to be in the hundreds before we were through.

I know, I'm an asshole. But I was gonna make sure she never forgot that weekend. Never.

Whenever I felt even a hint of life below the belt, I'd have her suck me to life, and I'd have my way with her. By Sunday afternoon, I didn't even want to come anymore. I just wanted to fuck her. And I did.

I slept with her in my arms, and did whatever I wanted to that sexy body anytime I woke even a little.

By Sunday night she was aching and begging for mercy. Her pussy and ass were raw, and she could hardly speak from having me down her throat so much. She sounded like she was a lifelong smoker, her voice was so rough and hoarse.

She told me everything about her life with him and to be brutally honest, I felt a little sorry for the bastard. To love someone that completely, and to be with her, but to never really have her. It was sad. He gave her everything, sacrificed for her, bought her that nice car while he drove a clunker. All for nothing.

Monday morning I peeled her off of me. Found the energy for one last good fucking, which I don't think she enjoyed, as sore as she was, but she'd never deny me. She couldn't. I showered and got ready for work, and she sat in the bathroom and watched me. That was all. Just stared.

As I was finishing up, she hugged me. "I guess there's a lot I've got to do. I've taken the week off, since I'm supposed to be on my honeymoon. I need to talk to Mom and the family and explain things. I guess I owe him a last meeting, to clear things up. That's not going to be easy." She sighed. "Can you drop me off at his place? I need to get my car."

"No problem," I told her, and accepted another one of her soul kisses. I was so fucked out I didn't feel any response down below. Good thing, because it was gonna have to last for a while.

I dropped her off, and called in sick. Hit the bank and moved all the money to a new account. Went back to the house and boxed her stuff up, including her wedding gown. Changed the sheets and aired out the room.

It had been an amazing weekend, but I didn't need the memories coming back to haunt me.

I locked up the place as securely as I could, and ran for the hills.

Let's face it. I'd fucked up. No way I was taking her back! That wasn't in the cards. I let the pussy blind me, and I had some fun, but that's as far as it was going.

Yeah, I took the money. I felt it was only fair. It was mine. I figured out what I thought I really owed her. The house was mine, the gun collection was mine. The 401K was mine. She deserved none of that. I never should have paid the cheating whore alimony. I'm fair. I wasn't going to cheat her. I made a check out for nearly $13,000, and mailed it to Mom, for Sheri, with a careful accounting of why it's all she deserved.

I called my boss the second day, and we had a long heart-to-heart over the phone. He was more sympathetic than I expected. He let me go, but assured me that if I ever got my head on straight, we could start right back where we were. I thanked him.

My phone was off for three days. I finally called and had the service interrupted. I explained I was going to be overseas. They were pretty good about it. I didn't know they could just pause the service, extending the contract and picking back up when you wanted. I had to contact them within six months, or I'd be stuck with breaking the contract.

By the time I hit the beach at Hedonism II, I was starting to unwind. After Sheri and I got divorced, I'm ashamed to say I was never with another woman, until our weekend together. At Hedonism, I found that there were a lot of 'friendly' women out there. A lot. Mostly married and older, and willing to be shared. If you're a younger guy, in good shape, with a decent attitude, you can get more sex than you can shake a stick at. And yes, I shook my stick a lot. The sad part was, I found out what I had long suspected. None were as good as Sheri. At least not with me.

Nevertheless, it was good. Great, really. Relaxing, fun. I did some weird things, things I can't even write about. Two days into the second week, my sanity level was back to the point where I could call home.

I hung up about 10 seconds into it. I wasn't going to take the yelling.

Two days, and two calls later, at least they were being somewhat reasonable.

"What have you done, baby?" Mom whined.

"Nothing. I took a vacation I badly needed. The stress was too much. Y'all pushed, and pushed, and pushed, and finally pushed too far."

"Sheri's a mess. You couldn't at least tell her you were going? We would have understood. You didn't even leave a key for her to get into the house."

"Of course not. It's not her house. It stopped being that over three years ago, when she cheated on me, bled me dry financially, and moved in with the bastard she cheated with."

"But you got back together?" Mom whined.

"I fucked her Mom. She wanted it, I gave it to her. That's all it was. A good time was had by all, and it's over."

"She said you took her back."

"She assumed. I never agreed, but wasn't going to mess up a weekend of great sex. I'm never taking her back. I've told all of you that a million times."

"What is she going to do now? It was the last straw with her fiancé. He's finally done with her. Dumped her stuff outside your house. Where's she supposed to stay?"

"She has $13 grand, Mom. She can rent a place. Get a job. Do what the rest of the world does."

"How could you take her money?"

"It was my money. She and her lawyers stole it from me. When she gave it back, I wasn't going to fight it. Only fair thing she's done in 3 years. I gave her what she deserved, I was more than fair."

"Fair! I expected better from you. You stole more than $90,000 from her. You broke up her wedding. Used her and threw her out. How could you do that?"

"I guess it's like everyone has said for three years. I'm an asshole. When you're told that enough I guess it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy." There was a knock on the door. "Gotta go, Mom. I bet that's Dave at the door. I'm gonna help make his wife and sister airtight tonight."


"Ask sis, she'll explain it."

"But what about Sheri?"

"Tell her I had a good time. I'll see her around." I hung up, and popped one of the little pills that are so readily available around the resort. I had big hopes for the evening.

* * *

So that's me. The asshole. I went back after a month. Got my job back. Listened to the bitching and moaning, the crying, the legal threats. It doesn't bother me anymore. Once you've embraced your inner asshole, it's so much easier.

Take Sheri for instance. I got over it. When I want her, I'll invite her over for a while. Fuck her brains out. If she denies me anything, I throw her out. She'll keep taking it, because she loves me, and believes that sooner or later I'll see the light.

Nope. But I'll fuck her, because the woman is awesome in bed.

I'll fuck others. I'm looking, with some success. Who knows, someday I might find someone as good as Sheri, and not just in bed. I'm not holding my breath, because I'm pretty sure all women have their inner asshole, and it's a lot closer to the surface. How else can you explain cheating on your spouse?

Family events are a lot calmer. Less pressure nowadays. Sheri's usually there. Sometimes she even goes with me. Even more often she'll go home with me. I'll admit it, once I've had a few drinks, the urge to fuck the living shit out of her surfaces. I think she knows it. One week, I found myself half-drunk every night, while she plied me with alcohol, and reaped the rewards.

I know, some of you will think I've caved, because I let her keep some of her stuff in the closet. Took her with me on vacation. Her visits have been getting longer. I stock Diet Pepsi in the refrigerator.

I don't think so. I'm not married to her. No obligations. So I like her, big deal. I enjoy spending time with her, and I love the sex. Absolutely love it. I'm a man. Still got my balls. So what if I like to empty them in her.

That rumor about her being pregnant? Shit happens. Not my problem. Alright, I told her the kid would always have a place with me, and I'll take care of 'em, whatever it is. If she can prove it's mine. Gotta admit, I don't doubt that. The woman's head-over-heels blind infatuated with me. She wouldn't go behind my back again.

But no guarantees. She has her own room. Not that I can remember the last time she spent the night there, but it's official. Her room. My room. If I decide to move on, I'll take care of her and my kid, but I'm a free man. I can see anyone I want. I tell her that, tell everyone. Nobody's tying me down again. I won't be burned like that. Not again.

So what, that it's been, uh...

"How long's it been, Honey?"

"How long, what, Rick? Are you still writing?"

"You know, since I was, uh, with..."

"Seventeen months, two weeks, three days since you fucked that skank. Was she so unremarkable you can't even remember?"

Like I said, so what if it's been over a year since I've been with anyone else. I could if I wanted to. I'm my own man. Nobody tells me...

"Yes, I heard you. I'll be a couple more minutes. You know it doesn't take me long to shower."

"Wear the blue suit I laid out for you. It looks nice on you."

"I will, I... You're wearing THAT!"

"Don't you think I look... No baby, not now... Please, I just got ready... Oh! Baby, we shouldn't... Ohhhhh, yeah, right there... sweet Jesus, Rick, the things you do to me..."

Where was I? I'm an asshole. I get it. But I'm my own man, and I've moved on.

There's a moral in here, somewhere.


Something a little different. I hope you enjoyed it, and as always, I welcome all comments.

Report Story

byTx Tall Tales© 57 comments/ 82740 views/ 65 favorites

Share the love

Similar stories

Tags For This Story

Report a Bug

2 Pages:12

Please Rate This Submission:

Please Rate This Submission:

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Please wait
Favorite Author Favorite Story

heartpaulrover, recass1 and 63 other people favorited this story! 

by Anonymous

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by Nexttimeround04/07/18

Brilliant --

cruel and very amusingly told. Is divorce really like that? ..... er I guess yes it is.

Just as no good deed goes unpunished, the best way out of victimhood is to be a complete bastard, sorry asshole.more...

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by Anonymous12/16/17

I Do Enjoy A Humorous Story

All of the outside interference reminds me of a woman who had her daughter-in-law have sex with three of her sons, the brothers to her husband. She had three children, one each from her brothers-in-law,more...

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by Boomerbill10/16/17

Remarkably funny

This story makes a poignant statement about human relationships; parody for sure but right on the money.

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by Anonymous08/31/17

Loved it !!!!!!!'

Thank you. I needed this.

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.
by Anonymous07/19/17

Funny as hell !

I laughed my ass off. You have such a wide range of skills, serious , sexy, angry, funny. And, you're good at them all. Thanks for another great offering. 😊

If the above comment contains any ads, links, or breaks Literotica rules, please report it.

Show more comments or
Read All 57 User Comments  or
Click here to leave your own comment on this submission!

Add a

Post a public comment on this submission (click here to send private anonymous feedback to the author instead).

Post comment as (click to select):

You may also listen to a recording of the characters.

Preview comment

Forgot your password?

Please wait

Change picture

Your current user avatar, all sizes:

Default size User Picture  Medium size User Picture  Small size User Picture  Tiny size User Picture

You have a new user avatar waiting for moderation.

Select new user avatar: