Exposing My Body Online Ch. 02bydavidwriter©
Two days passed. I had to admit, I felt just a little bit excited to think that when I got home my pictures would be there on that website and, hopefully, there would be comments from guys about my body! How strange, I thought: if I ever thought of girls doing this sort of thing, it was in the context of bikini models or, worse, porn. Dumb girls who were either sluts or didn't know any better or just were too dumb to earn a proper living.
But more or less this was exactly what I had done, wasn't it? But I wasn't a dumb girl, and I certainly wasn't a slut. I was university educated; I had a brain and I was using it. I was a senior legal secretary at a prominent city law firm. A legal secretary doesn't sound like much of a big deal, but it is. You basically run the place. The lawyers wouldn't ever think of it or realize it, but without people like me basically wet nursing them, they'd be in real trouble. And there was real responsibility with the job, because it was in the legal sphere if I got anything wrong there could be grave consequences.
But here I was, I thought to myself during the train trip home, an intelligent young woman, if really just an average girl with no particular claim to fame, exhibiting my body on a girlie website! Years ago I would have looked down my nose at such a thing. I would have seen it as puerile and exploitative. But who was being exploited here? Not me. I had done this on my own terms, of my own choosing. And I was doing it anonymously, as 'Lola', just as Mandy had done it as 'Lazy Susan', so, well, who cares? Best of all, it was a nice distraction from thinking about Rick. And that's really what this was about.
When I got to the apartment I logged on immediately. The site opened and I scrolled down the day's submissions. There were about 20. I scanned through them. Then I saw it -- Lola. I felt a rush through my body as I clicked the link. There it was: 'Never done this before. Let me know what you think.'
And there were my pictures! I scrolled down -- I didn't need to look at them. I needed to see if there were any comments. Yes, there were! About ten of them. I read through some. The first one read:
'Nice start, good body'.
'Boring!' said the next.
Hmm. I moved on.
'you gotta be nekkid on this sight if U want my vote babe,'
Hmm, yes, and maybe you also need to be able spell, I thought to myself.
'Oh Lola, great body, you look fantastic! Please come back again!'
I liked that one; sweet.
'Good body babe, really really nice. Great first contribution -- Pete'.
That's nice. I noticed that Pete even supplied an email address.
'damn Lola, you're hot! Do post again, you've got great tits!'
I liked that one. Hardforyou -- what a laugh!
'good start Lola, we're waiting to see more. Show us your tits!'
'I quoth from mine play, 'Antony and Cleopatra': Age cannot wither her, nor custom stale her infinite variety.
But, dear girl, had I not shuffled off this mortal coil some centuries past, I might be driven to an utterance something of the order of: "fuck you're sexy, lola, my cock is hard thinking about those tits".'
William Shakespeare? I had to laugh at that. And he's even quoting Shakespeare!
'don't waste our time -- show us your pussy!'
'OMG, this is one of the best new posts I've ever seen on this site. Lola, you're so sexy. Please, please, please send more -- more more more!!'
That was the last one. Wow. The various messages tumbled through my head as I took it all in. It was weird. It was exciting. I sat there at the computer, my hand reaching down to gently play with my clitoris as I read them again and again and again. 'love to fuck you'. 'show us your tits'. 'great body'. 'Please come back'. 'my cock is hard thinking about those tits'. 'we're waiting to see more'. 'more more more!'.
God, this was as real rush! Mandy wasn't kidding. I read them again as my fingers went to work. Oh yes, this really was fun!
'damn Lola, you're hot'
Love that one. Mmm. But one guy had said 'boring'. Another wrote 'don't waste our time'. I felt a little put out at that -- I mean, if you've got nothing nice to say, why not move on to another girl's pics? It wasn't like there was any shortage of them on the website.
Boring. How dare he? How damned uncharitable. I was quite annoyed, although I realized that was a silly response. I mean, I don't even know who the guy is -- and I didn't want to know. For all I know it could be anyone -- like a fat old man living in trailer trash hell. Even so, it grated, it spoiled the experience. I'll fix him, I thought to myself. I got up and grabbed the camera. Boring. Let's see if they find this boring!
I went into my bedroom and stripped off my work clothes, down to my panties and bra. I looked in the mirror. Yep, you look good. Not 'boring'. I picked up the camera and aimed it at the mirror, at my reflection, standing there in my white underwear. Click.
I put the camera down and unclasped my bra. I grabbed the camera again. Click. Good. I trust you won't find this 'boring', Big Bob, I laughed to myself.
I slipped my hand inside the waist band of my panties. No, I couldn't do that. But why not? It's not like anyone will know who I am. I took a shot as I rolled the material down over my hip. I had to admit, it looked pretty raunchy.
I took them off. Now I was naked. I looked into the camera. Naked girl. It almost didn't look like myself. Well, you couldn't see my face behind the camera. But yes, I did look good. My God, I'm standing in my bedroom taking naked pics of myself!
I put the camera down. Four shots, done. I went back to the computer and loaded them onto the desktop. Now, to upload them on the site.
But should I? I was suddenly gripped with a sense of apprehension. These are fully naked pics, showing everything! I shouldn't. But it was no more than what Mandy had done. And look at all the comments she had got. And no one will ever know it's me. I sat there for a while contemplating things. Should I?
Oh just do it!
I uploaded. The message window came up again. What would I write? I typed: 'my second time here - thanks for all the nice comments'.
Meaning no thanks for the insults, I thought to myself. I sat there, allowing myself time to be fully sure I really wanted to do this again. I hadn't expected this, wanting to do it a second time, I hadn't really thought about it, but if I had beforehand I would have thought it was a one time and one time only. But here I am again, about to post, this time, naked pics of myself on this website!
My fingers strayed down between my legs. The tips of my fingers discovered what my mind already knew, and that was that I was wet. Truth be told, I was feeling extremely horny, extremely sexual, and I liked that feeling. This was exciting. Really exciting. For the first time in a couple of weeks I felt 'alive', blood coursing through my veins, as if before I had been in some kind of coma state. I felt alive, alive in a sexual sense, and it felt good. That is enough, that's enough to know that this is the right thing to do.
'Here you go guys', I found myself thinking as I hit the confirmation button firmly with my finger, 'take a look at this!'
Next morning I felt quite contented with myself, almost as if I had done something positive for the first time since Rick dumped me, done something meaningful, some self validating. A pretty sordid method of self validating, but it had felt really, really good. I still ached inside, but I could see a possible light at the end of the darkness.
I was thinking all this through as I passed by the construction site on the way to work, where I had been disappointed before when the guys didn't notice me. Yes, shallow, I know, but... As I walked by I squinted out of the corner of my eye as the workmen came into view. One looked up from his work at me, but only briefly, the returned to his hammering. He looked disinterested. I imagined him in my mind as 'Big Bob' from the website, looking at me and thinking, 'boring!' It kind of damped my spirits a bit, though I wasn't sure why.
The two days rolled around quickly -- mercifully we were really busy at work. That suited me fine. And that evening, when I got home, hopefully there would be more comments from guys about my pics -- my naked pics! It sent a little thrill through my body as I eagerly walked back to the apartment.
I logged on. Yep, there it was. I felt my heart beating strongly. I opened the page and quickly scrolled down to the comments section. There they were -- more this time, maybe 20!
'The lunatic, the lover, and the poet, are of imagination all compact. Dear lady, thou hast mine savage heart soothed, so by thine sweet blossoming flower!'
Hmm, Shakespeare again. They call Shakespeare the "Immortal Bard" - maybe he really immortal! Well, probably not. "Shakespeare" is probably a pretty strange guy, I thought. But funny.
'babe, you've got a killer body, thank you, thank you. And hey, Shakespeare -- you're an idiot, why don't just fuck off!'
Oh Bikeman, that's a bit rough.
'OMG, I just shot a load looking that this!'
I felt myself blushing!
'babe, you need a photographer, it's a crime you having to take the shots yourself -- you're just too fucking hot!'
'please show us your face. This teasing is driving me crazy!'
'This site is so great, I love this: you upload, and I unload - my cock that is'
'wow -- you're back -- baby you are the hottest thing I've ever seen on this site. Love to suck those little nipples.'
'still boring -- but glad U now at least nekkid. Girl get a photographer!'
'dittio Bog Bob, the man speaks the truth -- hell honey, I'll even take the shots myself. Least I could do, he he..'
Wonderful contribution Lola. You look so damn sexy with no clothes on, you have a perfect body. I will go to bed with a hardon for you'
I liked that last one. Very sweet. God, this was so exciting! My body felt tingling all over. I looked at Pete's comment again: 'You look so damn sexy with no clothes on, you have a perfect body. I will go to bed with a hard on for you'. It sent a little tingle through my body as I sat there reading it over and over again. Thank you Pete!
I saw that Pete supplied an email address again. I should send him a personal thanks. No I shouldn't. But why not? It wasn't really the right thing to be doing, conversing like that with a stranger. But I was anonymous. That was the whole point of this. And so was he, for that matter -- anonymous. Could be anyone, for all I know. Might even be in a different country; might be living in the same apartment block. But I wanted to thank him for making me feel good, who ever and where ever he was; as if nothing else but just to communicate. Yes, I would send him an email.
'Thank you Pete for your kind words, I'm glad you like my pics!
Within a minute a response came into my inbox. I felt a sense of, well, almost excitement to see the message from Pete come up.
'The pleasure is all mine my dear. You are just unbelievably sexy! Thank you for sharing!'
Nice! I felt thrilled. I replied straight away.
"well thank you Pete. You are so sweet. Makes a girl feel special!'
I felt almost a little bit silly as I typed that last sentence, it sounded a bit juvenile, but what the hell, it felt good. I almost felt as though I was acting in some play, pretending to be someone else in front of an audience. And the audience loved me!
Soon his reply came back.
'Well, you are special. But can I ask, why did you choose to post your pics? I mean, I just love it that you are, and that you're chatting here, but just wondering'.
Getting a bit personal, I thought. Oh what the hell. In any case, this was good therapy. I replied.
'well I wouldn't normally have done this, but I was feeling a bit depressed.'
His reply came back:
'I'm sorry to hear that. I can't imagine that you'd be too unhappy for long, if you're depressed about a relationship thing. Forgive me if I'm prying. But if it's that, let me say that you are so sexy that so many guys would be falling over you. And I'd be at the head of the line! But has this helped -- are you feeling any better?'
'thanks Pete. Yes, it has helped, I am feeling better. I don't want to go into the details with you, because I don't know you, but I guess I was not feeling very attractive.'
'Well, babe, you are -- you are'. I just sent you a pic, I hope you don't mind, but this is what your pics do to me.'
I saw the attachment. I opened it. It was a photo, a photo that showed the grainy image of my naked body on a computer screen, but with the torso of a man standing in front of it, naked. His cock was hard. Oh my God.
At first it seemed grotesque, and definitely weird. But I looked at it, and noted that the cock in the pic was erect. It was hard, hard because of my pics. And the man's body -- lean and muscular. Sexy. His cock was hard, pointing to the ceiling. Oh God, I felt a throb through my body. My heart was beating fast. Oh my God, look at that! It's depraved, but it's just so hot!
I typed a reply:
'thanks Pete, I can see you really like my pics!'
"Yes, I can't hide it. Hey, can I ask a request?' he fired back instantly
A request, I thought. What could that mean? I felt apprehensive. What does he want? But as I sat there my body tingled; I was sweating. In short, the whole deal was getting me hot. Rather than thinking too much I just went with it. I typed:
'You can ask, but I can always refuse. What is your request?'
'I want you to take a special pic, just for me'.
'Oh yes? What sort of pic'
'Sitting, legs spread, naked. Showing everything. Show me that sweet pussy baby. I need it!'
Gosh. I felt myself almost gasping. I hadn't expected this. Oh God, he wants me to do that? My body tingled. I looked over at the camera sitting on the desk. 'show me that sweet pussy baby'.
No. I couldn't do it. This was just a little bit too weird, too suss, too, well, I don't know, sordid maybe. No, I can't do that. I typed a reply:
'Sorry Pete, but I don't even know you'.
The reply came back:
'I'm sorry Lola, I was out of line there. But you're just so sexy. I hope you are not offended. And please -- please please post again! I'll be looking on the site every day for you!'
That's sweet, very nice of him. But was I going to do this again? Probably not, I thought. This had been fun, and it provided the answer I was looking for: it was there in those comments. I typed:
'Pete, it's OK, no offence taken. I might post again, maybe, don't know. It's bedtime now for me -- sweet dreams, and thank you.'
I shut the computer down and went to bed. I felt good. I lay there in bed thinking of all the comments. 'I just shot a load looking that this!' 'wow -- you're back -- baby you are the hottest thing I've ever seen on this site. Love to suck those little nipples' 'Wonderful contribution Lola. You look so damn sexy with no clothes on, you have a perfect body. I will go to bed with a hardon for you'
I lay there, naked, thinking of all those men looking at me. My naked body. I ran my hands along my hips, feeling my skin. Up along my tummy, my breasts, feeling my nipples, pinching them. Ohh. Touching myself, rubbing my clitoris, my lips, feeling the wetness. I felt myself drifting away, drifting...
That night I had a strange dream. I was sitting in the train, on the way to work, just a normal day. In the carriage I was the only female. There were five men in there with me; one standing directly in front of me, the others sitting on the opposite side of the train. I was wearing a short, plain white dress. They were all dressed impeccably in dark blue pinstriped suits, with red ties. They were all looking at me, except the man who stood.
He was standing right in front of me, just a little too close. If I looked forward in the carriage, I was staring straight at his crotch. I couldn't see his face. Then all of a sudden he was naked. And the naked image before me was the naked image of Pete in the photograph. And just like the in the photo, his cock was hard. It was right there, right in front of my face. Its presence was almost overpowering; I could almost feel its warmth. The train rocked and the man's body shifted towards me.
I looked up as the tip of his cock grazed against my cheek. I felt the sticky fluid bead wipe across my skin. Then I saw his hand as it came down to grab the cock. He took hold and guided it towards me, towards my lips. I felt the tip graze against my lips. I felt its wetness again. He said nothing, though instinctively I knew it was Pete.
I looked up, up at the guys on the seats opposite. They were all looking at me now, their eyes transfixed, watching me, that unmistakable look of lust in their eyes. They somehow seemed like a pack of angry wolves waiting to devour their prey. Then I felt Pete thrust forward, thrust his cock against my lips.
I opened my mouth and let it slide inside. I watched the men; some of them were gasping now, grunting, consumed by their need. The sexual energy in the train was all pervasive. I began to suck Pete's cock, began to slide my lips over it, feeling the size, the warmth, the wetness. The train rocked from side to side as it seemed to pick up speed. Desire burned inside me. I sucked him, devoured him, licked him, loved him. It was like I was in a trance; nothing existed except Pete's cock in my mouth. He grunted. It was a powerful sound. It was about to happen. It was too late now, too late to stop. He was cumming.
I felt him thrust deep into my mouth, felt his body spasm. Like a bullet, I felt him blast into my mouth: Bang! Then another blast, throb after throb, pulsing as he flooded my mouth. I was no longer aware of the other men, though they were still there, I was sure. I sucked him and sucked him, milking the last essence, all of it, till there was nothing left. And then he just disappeared. Gone. The others were gone too, but I didn't feel alone. It felt amazing.
I pondered over this most strangest of dreams as I lay in bed, trying to will myself to get up, gently playing with my clitoris as I recalled the strange night movements of my consciousness. But as weird as it all was, the strangest thing about the dream was that when he came in my mouth, it was like the sweetest nectar I had ever tasted.