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Click hereA look to the youth with the innocent eyes
with his hand held out
and his tongue spilling lies,
so she follows
A tilt of her head with a courtesans ease
accepting his word
she falls down to her knees
so she swallows
And when he is spent his boot lashes out
upon her fair hand
his venom is ground
so she's hollow
she pulls from the dress her seam ripping shears
his blood's not so blue but it spills with her tears
the guilt of her heart, the gilt of his hair
the glow of the fire in his now vacant stare
but I feel it could really use some restructuring. Just a little more time spent on this baby- add some punctuation, clarify a couple of things, etc. I like the dread I felt in this poem, and the guilty humor as well. hOpe to see you post more :)