tagHumor & SatireMmmmmmm...



Mmmmnnnnh, oh, OH OH HOH!!!!!!!!!!

Greetings to you, my dear, good friend! How are you?

My reason for writing to you, this fine eve, is to ask if you like food! I don't just mean, food: the stuff we eat every day to sustain our lives. No, Lover, I'm talking about, "FOOD!"

Food should be a sensuous and sensual experience, am I right? Something that releases your inhibitions and makes your eyes light up, your taste buds come alive... Something that releases deep, inner passions from somewhere, down in your soul, something that has been yearning to be freed since... since... well, since your last great meal! And, if you've never had a meal like this, then let me share with you what I am eating, right now:

It is 8:40 pm on Monday, Sept. 5, 2005.

I have just taken the whole-wheat pasta off the stove and have finished making my sauce.

And what a sauce it is!

I've made a white sauce, using some light cream, corn starch, mozzarella cheese and white wine. Mmmmm... Are ya' with me so far? Cool.

OK. In that same sauce pan, I've put some precooked (steamed,) whole, medium-sized shrimp, some thickly sliced, fresh mushrooms and, ohhhh, just enough garlic to curl your hair. (Mmmmmmm! Ya' can't forget the garlic!) And now I'm covering the pot to let all those good tastes simmer for a bit...

Oh, yeah, don't forget to throw on a little more wine! You'll thank me after you taste it!

Ahhhh... I can smell the good taste, already and, I gotta tell ya', it's makin' me horny!!!

Ooooooo! I can tell you, there is nothin' like sex in the kitchen, while ye're waitin' fer supper ta cook! MMM, mm, MM, MM, mmmmmmmhhh! It's taking all my will power to not stroke my hardening cock, right now, lemme tell ya'!

[Heh, heh, I just thought of something: I could make My OWN white sauce with My OWN cream! Now, how would THAT taste, I wonder... I guess you'll just hafta cum over here and try some...!]

Alright, now that the food's tastes have melded together and everything's just right, it's time to throw in some healthy stuff... Gotta fight off those free radicals. So, here's where I throw in some fresh, steamed broccoli! (Hey, George Bush Sr. hated it so it must be good!) Besides, it adds a nice, healthy green color to the meal. And, if you don't like it, fine. I'll eat your portion. More for Me, I always say!

Let it all cook for a little bit longer.

Now, that it's all cooked, I'll set the table and you can wait to eat.

But, wait! You're still fully dressed! We can't have this. You need to get undressed, right now, my friend! Go ahead, that's right. All the way. Very nice, I like your breasts when they're bare like that. You can't hide behind your clothes. You're now free to express yourself and I like the _expression your nipples are giving me. Very nice, my love. Have I ever told you how much I love your nipples when they're pointy like that? Ahh, look, they just got harder. And look at my erection! Those nipples of yours are having a very similar effect on my penis! And I can see that you are starting to drool a little bit. I don't know if my hardened cock is causing that reaction or the smell of the food is doing it for you.

Oh, well. It's time to put the food on the table anyway. There'll be time to explore each other further, once the meal is done and the table cleared.

As I pour the wine, I can see your body a little better. I get a whiff of your perfume mixed with the smell of the meal. And, what's that other scent? Could it be, "lust?" Yup, it's your pussy, all right, dripping on the cushion on the chair your bare ass is sitting on. Mmmmmmm... Talk about lovely smells.

As I sit down, I raise my glass to make a toast. "To a lovely meal and a lovely guest and may we both get something wonderful from this meal, other than indigestion!" I say with a wide grin on my face, causing you to laugh. Do you know how much I love to hear you laugh?

We eat the food and enjoy it, immensely! I've never seen anybody eat and enjoy food like you do. It must be good, because you're eating it with a smile on your face. As each bite disappears from our plates, and fills our tummies, it becomes clear that we shouldn't eat too much... We should save room for dessert!

And you know what that means: My specialty --- Chocolate Chip Cookies and Ice Cream!

But not for you, yet. Nor for me, either. First I'll need to prepare them correctly.

You look at me with that quizzical look on your face as I tell you to lay down on the table (I need to thank you for clearing the dishes, right here, my love. It saves a lot of time when we work together like this.) Now, while you're flat on your back, on the table like that, with your legs spread-eagle, dangling over the sides, I can now apply the mooshed-up cookies mixed in with the ice cream.

Mmmmmmm, I just love this taste and I can tell you do, too, as I put my finger in the bowl, then into your mouth and feel you suck and clean my finger off with your tongue. The feel of your hot mouth on my cold fingers is causing my cock to rise again, you little vixen, you... Mmmmmmmmmmm! I love it when you do that to me, please don't ever stop!

I like how the coldness of the mixture, when applied to your breasts, makes your nipples get so hard! I also love it when I suck on them, your moans tend to get really low, like that. You sound so much like a jungle cat with all that purring coming from the back of your throat...! Now I get to spread more of the mixture on your belly button. Remember me telling you about that girl who used to cum just from me licking her navel? Well, I can see by the wetness forming between your pussy lips that you just might be emulating her! I hope you don't mind if I tease you a bit longer and continue to work your belly button a bit longer before venturing lower!

*Sniff!* Ahhhh, the smells emanating from this table are driving me wild, I need to say, here. The chocolate and the vanilla ice cream and your own musk are making me crazy!

I love hearing you squeeeal as I spread the big scoop of the sweet stuff all over your shaved pubic mound! I wonder what it feels like to have that cold ice cream melting into your warm pussy, like that? I hope you'll tell me one of these days...

Mmmmmmm... Finally, I get to taste what I've been longing for, all night: your dripping pussy! I taste the ice cream, first, of course. Well, that, mixed-in with those delicious cookies, actually. But the next flavor is that scrumptious pussy of yours!


Can you feel my tongue sliding and dipping between your labia? Or has the coldness taken away some of the sensitivity from your most private of areas, down here, where my face, mouth and tongue are currently residing?

Ohhhhhhhhhh, my lovely, lovely girl! Your cunt is the most spectacularly yummy tasting thing in the world! I can imagine whole Nations going to war, just to sample some of what I'm feasting on, at the moment! If I could talk -- if I could pull my mouth from this meal fit for a King and actually talk -- I would tell you how you're the pinnacle of all my life's experiences; how everything else I eat, from this moment on, will merely be for sustenance and not for enjoyment. For this, my dear, is all that I have lived for!

Your second, third and fourth orgasms come in rapid succession as I clean the very last crumb and drop of the dessert from between your labial folds... No, wait! What's that I see hiding beneath your clitoral hood? Could it be a blob of my dessert? Ahhh, goody, goody, gumdrops, it IS! Ahh, ha haaa! My fun is not over yet... And neither is yours, my good woman!

How much more of this can you stand? I guess we'll both find out, won't we!

While I'm working on your clit, here, I'd like to stick a finger or two into your tight, juicy pussy, if you don't mind. And judging from your reaction to the sudden intruders, it doesn't look like you mind at all!

And what's this little bump inside your wet vagina? Could this be your G-Spot? Ooooo, I wonder what'll happen if I rub it, just like this!

Mmm, hmmm! Just as I expected: Total release of all your sexual energies!

Wow! You just came like no one I've ever seen before! I think I'll need to repaint my ceiling cuz' your face-print is all over it! Ahhh, but it's a lovely face to look at when I stretch my neck in that direction so maybe I'll just leave it there. (You didn't think I'd notice that you'd shot up to the ceiling when I brushed your G-Spot, did you? Well, I surely did! And you're entirely welcome for it, too, my love!)

Well, sweetheart. It's been twenty minutes and your breathing has finally calmed down enough for you to start to think again. And ya' know what I think? I think it's time for you to spread some of that delicious Chocolate Chip cookie and ice cream slop onto MY body, now! C'mon sugar! My fleshy, pink stir-stick is all ready to be covered with the gooey mess and cleaned off with your tongue, too!

Well, waddaya waitin' for?

Ahhhh, that's more like it!


Ha ha ha...

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