My Country AuntbyStarlight©
Mine were the feelings of love as I stayed inside Nina. She was pressing soft kisses over my face and whispering, "My love, my love." My hand explored her breasts as her nipples relaxed from the tensions of her urgent desires now sated.
As we eventually separated we lay I each other's arms, and slipped into post-coital sleep.
For the rest of that weekend, Nina and I were wrapped in an ecstacy of love for each other. It was not so much that we wanted to be having sexual intercourse continually, but we could not leave each other alone. We touched and caressed and kissed. We went around the cottage naked, and the beauty and dignity of her body enchanted me.
Monday arrived, and I knew that in late afternoon I had to be on my way home. The thought of parting from Nina seemed unbearable. I was now hopelessly lost in love with her.
Nina was the one who spoke out about our situation. "Darling, we are committing incest. Do you want to go on doing this with me?" I fervently assured her that I did.
Put briefly, it was agreed that I should spend as much time as possible with her at the cottage. This meant weekends and the brief annual leave we had in those days.
This arrangement went on for two years. In order to spend less time in travelling to and from the cottage, I saved every penny I could, and with Nina's financial help, I bought a motor bike. This allowed me to take off straight from work at the weekend, and be with Nina within an hour or so.
It was towards the end of our second year of love, and as we lay in each other's arms after intercourse, Nina said quietly, "Darling, we are going to have a baby."
I was stunned. That I was stunned shows how foolish I was. Through endless sexual intercourse, no contraceptives had been used. Given that there was nothing amiss with our ability to breed, pregnancy had to happen some time. The only wonder was that it had not happened long before this.
What aunt and nephew had been doing together was unknown to anyone. My parents had been puzzled that I spent every weekend and holiday away from home, but seemed to assume that I was going off fishing, or on some jaunt. The cottage was isolated, so few people saw me around the place, and if they did, and they knew who I was, assumed I was just paying a nephewly visit to an aunt.
For me the real agony of our situation was that I truly loved Nina. Given the choice I would have married her, but the law forbade it. If we had been married, I would have rejoiced at Nina's news that she carried our child within her. But given our situation…?
As usual, it was Nina who broke through. "Love, I don't want you to be unhappy about this, I'm not. You are not to worry, I can handle this, and love doing it. I want this child, and I want you to want it too. No one need ever know who the father is, except us.
I wanted to be very masculine and protective. I had finished my apprenticeship and now received full tradesman's wages. I told Nina I would try to get a job locally and support her and the child financially.
"No you won't," she said sharply. "I've said I can handle things. I don't want any indication that you might be the father, as for money, I can deal with that too.
Then began the first serious argument Nina and I had ever had. She won the verbal argument, but at a later time, I partially won the practical argument.
The child that was born was a girl, and we called her Julia. I continued to visit Rose Cottage but Nina and I became aunt and nephew again, and for the sake of ease, I was "Uncle," to Julia.
Having been refused the right to financially support Nina and Julia, I did all I could by way of presents of clothing and toys to help things along. When I was twenty-six an idea I had been nursing for some time came to fruition.
Even after all the years since the end of the war, the country was still struggling. I could see no worthwhile future for myself, and had thought about immigrating to Australia. I put the matter to Nina like this: "We would go together with Julia to Australia, and live openly as man and wife."
Nina put a counter proposition. "You go ahead to Australia, get settled, and we'll join you in, say, about a year."
I did not like the idea, and had I known what was to follow I would have liked it even less. Nina, however, was adamant, and so in the end I agreed.
I spent one last weekend with them at Rose Cottage before I left for Australia. The time was both passionate and sad, and as I went to leave, Nina clung to me, weeping.
After arriving in my new country, I wrote two or three times a week to Nina, then, about nine months after my arrival, I suddenly got one of my letters returned. The claim was that the addressee no longer lived at Rose Cottage, and her new address was unknown.
I was beside myself with anxiety. I wrote letter after letter, all of them returned. I wrote to family members, but none of them knew where Nina was. I did not have the financial means to return to England, so I was helpless to carry things any further.
Then one day a letter arrived. It was postmarked somewhere in the north of England. The letter simply said, "Live your life without me. It is better this way. Nina."
It was as if a close loved one had died. I grieved for months.
Of course, I gradually recovered. In time, I married and we have three children. My wife is the best of women, and we have been happy together.
A couple of years ago, unexpectedly, I received a visit from a cousin I had not seen for fifty-five years. She was visiting Australia as a tourist, and somehow had my address.
We talked nostalgically of old times and in the course of the conversation I asked about Nina. The cousin had news of her. After spending many year out of sight of the family, she had returned to Rose Cottage. She was eighty-two at the time my cousin talked with me, and was crippled with arthritis.
After my cousin left, my mind dwelt on Nina. I confess to you, reader, that in all the years since we parted, and deep in my secret self, she has always been my one true love. Over all the years, I have harboured that love within me.
If my thoughts could fly over the oceans and continents to reach Nina in Rose Cottage, they would say this to her. "I love you still, my darling, until death."