All Comments on 'AMOST - Keri'

Short and hot. Loved it.

In one paragraph you said:

"Less than ten minutes after meeting this hot blonde she is bent over and taking my dick deep inside her - such is the life of a mind controller."

While previously in that same paragraph saying:

"Normally going in this fast would be painful for us both, but my mental abilities (and long experience) prepared for this moment by dialing up her arousal levels ten minutes ago."

Not sure if actually an inconsistency (I think it is but not sure, there's some wiggle room) but it did cause me to stop and reread the paragraph and it bugs me enough to alert you.

Otherwise, it was fun.

Thank you both for the comments.

Anon - yeah, the ten minute thing... I noticed that error after I had submitted the story. I didn't think it worth resubmitting the story for that small continuity snafu; let's just pretend the protagonist had too many more interesting things to focus on to take accurate note of the time. ;)

MePe