All Comments on 'Chasing Cindy Pt. 03'

I normally dont like using profanity but are you @#$%$#@ serious?! 5 stars for a good story, 0 stars for brevity.

This story was going so good until i saw that last part... THE END???

you now have to start to write about them.. really flesh out the characters and their lives and you are finished.. i would have given you 5 stars for the story but because of how u ended it ....the end....... nothing at all

Wish there was a better ending and a different punishment for Ricardo.

I think there is a good story lurking in here, but it is WAY too short. Too much ground to cover to do it justice at this length. I'm guessing that you'd have to triple the length (at least) to do proper character development and fore shadowing.

The story had potential in the first part, but then you started recaping the previous parts and it took half the chapter. I think you had a good idea but you're not experienced enough as a writer to build on the idea. You should take a few creative writing classes so your stories get better. Good luck!

Great edgy story,had me hooked till the end, looking forward to more stories about these two.

Well done Shirleyanne xx

I got totally hooked onto this story and I absolutely loved the world you brought up but this story was cut incredibly and sadly short I could see so many things that could have happened to both of them before Logan came in to save her but that was all cut short look how about I help you out I'm a free time writer and I think of stuff like these for stories all the time!

This story has great potential but I think you wasted a lot of time recapping what happend in the previous chapter at the beginning on the next chapter. As a reader it's annoying to have to re-read everything you just read even if it's from a different prospective. I think with some editing this story could be really good

I hope that the author intends to add more to this story. The characters deserve to have more of their story told.

I love the idea of the recount of what the other character was feeling

But the chapters were a bit short for that approach all in all great story, built in a great world, bad ending. Thx for the read.